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Vivid Dream of A Former Lover

I was lying down having a short nap at about 12 noon,
just before going to work in the afternoon, two days
ago on Tuesday, 30 January.

I dreamt I was driving down this one-way road, and
there was this car coming towards me from the opposite
direction, obviously not realizing it was one-way only.

The car slowed to a stop facing mine, and I alighted to
talk to the driver, who also got down. The driver was
a female. To my shock, she was my first lover who left
me 19 years ago. She looked very depressed, as if trying
to tell me her current marriage was in ruins, and held
my hand.

Then another car behind her drove up and the driver
also got down. It was her husband. I was about to walk
up to give him a piece of my mind, when I woke up.

I have dreamt of her every every now and then over
the years, but it was never as vivid nor as direct as this,
and neither has this happened in the daytime during a
such a short nap, where I likely did not even have time
to reach the REM stage,

I am not sure if this was merely my subconscious telling
me that I still miss her and desire her back (which I do),
or if the dream meant anything.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 48, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Not in this forum, and not before today.

Re: Vivid Dream of A Former Lover

Tham,
Its apparent you have some knowledge of how dreams function and that's important. Although we do dream most often during REM sleep we also can dream at other stages of the sleep cycle. Daydreaming are different since we don't enter REM sleep. Daydreams oscillates between sleeping and waking and not being full REM sleep the conscious mind plays a bigger role as to the dream content. Daydreams are a mixture of unconscious and waking desires.

Your dream is probably confirming your wishful desires, as you stated in your post about wanting to get back with your ex-wife. But the one way street may be addressing the reality of those possibilities. The one way street may indicate you may want this but she may not. Or her being married makes it only you who is available. The presence of her husband in the dream may reinforce your conscious knowledge that she is married, being the opposite of you. Unless her marriage is actually in ruins then that part of the dream may be wishful thinking.

Consciously you have a desire to get back with your ex. I believe the dream is pretty addressing those wishful desires. But since dreams stem from the unconscious there may be a need to look at the motivations why you do want to get back with her. Is there another one way street where there is opposition to some other aspect of your life? This probably would make more likely to have these desires. It may wise to explore those possibilities. Causation {why we do things} are often more important than the act itself.

Gerard

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 56 Murfreesboro, Tn.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Re: Vivid Dream of A Former Lover

Thank you very much for your interpretation
which was very informative and eye-opening, Gerard.

Yes, I believe you are correct. The dream is likely
a manifestation of my wishful desires for her to come
back to me. The one-way street does also appears to
indicate that, while I want this, she does not, since she
was going in the wrong direction.

As for other one-way street you mentioned, possibly
the other obstacle could be my career, which is not
exactly a garden of roses now.

Possibly another subconscious trigger of this dream
could be something in common which two sources
told me recently, just before I had this dream. I had
a chat with two females on the net, one of whom had
natural psychic/paranormal abilities, the other was
apparently a Native American (Cree) young teen girl
who is currently an understudy of her Shaman grand-
mother in her tribe near Churchill, Manitoba. They
both told me that my ex was currently very unhappy
with her husband, who is keeping a mistress (which
would mean her marriage is actually in ruins) and
(to my utter surprise) still feels for me, kind of
regretting she made a mistake into leaving me and
marrying him, but realizing it was way too late to do
anything, since she now had kids and it has been
almost 20 years.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 48, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Not in this forum, and not before today.

Re: Vivid Dream of A Former Lover

Tham,
Thanks for your follow-up reply. Seldom do I get follow-up posts from men that details their thoughts and impressions from an interpretation. Most often it is the women who take the time to supply such information. I am beginning to believe there are too few men who have the capacity to understand the importance of dreams, especially men in the West.

Being from the East {Malaysia} may provide insights to why you are able to recognize the significance of your dreams. And why you are able to connect the 'dots'. I am beginning to believe the 'Eastern' psyche {in men} is more developed than those in the West.

Unlike the two women you met 'on-line', my only psychic skills are of the intuitive kind, natural abilities we all possess. Not to take away from these women's abilities. For anyone who studies the psyche, knowing just enough about the dreamer {your sex and age, and sometimes your cultural background} combined with an education in Jungian psyche and intuitive abilities, dreams can speak volumes about the life of a dreamer. And since all dreams are addressing the dreamer's life, one merely needs to discern what aspects of that life a particular dream is wishing to address.

Your dream seemed to focus on the direction in which you 'perceived' was what you 'wished' for. Being a daydream I put more emphasis on wishful thinking more so than what you unconsciously may have needed/wanted in your life. As I stated in my interpretation the conscious mind plays a bigger role when daydreaming. Wishful thinking seems to be an important aspect of day dreams where as they play less of a role in most 'night' time dreaming. But clues to the meaning of all dreams are always constant in the symbols. The one way street in your dream seemed to point to the realities in your life. Not only in the relationship with your ex-wife but also the deeper psyche {which most likely was your career, as you stated}. Perhaps the direction{s} pointed to in both aspects need the same attention. Having recognized the possibilities I believe you are more apt to understand how to navigate the 'one way' streets in your life. Since you now see the real possibilities of renewing the relationship with your ex, you can focus your attention on your career and how to manage that one way 'street'.

From your dream post and our dialog I sense we have added to the knowledge of how daydreams function. Research on daydreams is not as in-depth as that of natural sleep and what we have learned from your dream may help in our understanding. I appreciate your input and willingness to share your life experiences. You have added to our knowledge of the daydreams and how they can play a role in the understanding of the psyche.

Best wishes in your career decisions.
Gerard

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 56 Murfreesboro, Tn.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

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