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teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

I had this very puzzling dream two days ago and I have spend some time meditating on it but can't come to a conclusion even if I feel it has a profound significance but I cannot see which.As it might have a relation to the other dreams I posted I decided to post it as well.I would really appreciate if you could give it a try.
A teenage boy(who is one of my students in real life) is trying to strangle his father(who is not his real life father but more some sort of dwarf,very short and thin).I go between the two and take the father in my arms and lay him in my bed so that he can sleep there.My boyfriend and I have to sleep somewhere else because of that.I sleep on the sofa and my boyfriend in the spare bed in another room of my appartment.The next day I say that I have to find a solution because by sleeping on the sofa I got a stiff aching neck.
When i took the father in my arms I felt tenderness.But the more that I have been thinking about the dream ,the eerier gets the feeling towards this dwarf.
I have suddenly remembered a tale that fascinated me as a child which is called "rumpelstilzchen"by the Grimm brothers(and which I had forgotten for years.I don't know if you know the tale :here is a link
http://www.fln.vcu.edu/grimm/rumpeng.html if you are interested in reading the story.The father reminds me of that rumpelstilzchen(who is a dwarf and helps a princess to spin gold from straw but then claims her firstborn child).
I have also another question related to dreams:
If in the original dream you had a feeling towards a character and then in the next days the feeling towards him changes what does that mean and is this also something you have to take into account or is it just the feeling in the dream that you have to take as important or pay attention to?
Looking forward to your ideas...Margit

Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

The dwarf Father suggests that there is stunted growth within related to your masculine energy, The The father 'the stunted beliefs and attitudes' likely symbolises particular attitudes and appropriate responses that havent fully developed within the individual, But because in the dream he is not your father he likely represents undeveloped growth in one particular area of your life, and not all areas.
Getting a sense of where you feel handicapped in some way to a situation in your ife will help you to identify more with these traits in oneself.

The male energy born of this stunted growth is anger, There seems to be some response in self to this way of relating, or being handicapped in the world, that is frustrating and serves further to strangle this particular aspect of self. The throat also relates in to ones self expression and there is an action here taken to block this particular expression.

Taking the father in your arms suggests that you have or are beginning to embrace this one area of your life in relation to these attitudes and behaviour that no longer really serves you, and laying him in your bed within the dream intimates what is going on within the intimate layers of self, though there is still a tendency to put this in some way to the back of your mind, become unconscious to this part of ones self, put to sleep so to say.

Again shown to you by your finding a place to sleep and your boyfriend, the dream here seems to reflect that you switch off to what is going on inside you from time to time, even though you have began to access this particular place within you which has caused you to reorganise your inner arrangements and realtionship you have with your self,

Bedrooms indicate the intimate place in self that deals with inner communion (with spirit) for rest and rejuvenation, dreams for guidance, and connecting to one's sexual feelings, this embracing of these particular stunted attitudes is in some way making you adjust your relationship with your self, 'boyfriend sleeping in the spare bedroom' which also suggests that your current way of relating to oneself is seeking through dreams, guidance and connection to ones spirit new ways of understanding though this isnt allways a way you do/have done things in the past 'spare room'.

Your day to day feelings has awakened to the idea that this situation is in some way intolerable, you have to find a solution to this in some way which seems to be what your searching for at the moment, creating a stiff neck even weather this be a physical complaint that the dream is intimating the inner struggle is in some way manifesting in tension for you in your physical life, or is rather suggesting that the energy of this innerstruggle is not being released in the right way their is still a lot of tension in this area of your life that demands 'expression', thats not to say you need to verbally express this to someone else but it means more that the expression 'neck' comes from you actually connecting at the level of truth of this inner conflict, whats real for you and not at the level of mind understanding, which is, I wander how your trying to connect with the truth, of your dreams, guidance, Ie the part of you that inner way of understanding ideas, the same energy with which you relate to yourself understanding symbolised by your boyfriend is how your trying still to connect to what is going on inside you, 'boyfriend in spare bedroom', and is further causing discord to getting to the level of the truth of the situation.

Just some ideas to ponder, A father in dreams can relate at the personal level of how the father has inspired the qualitys of self respect, integrity and confidence in their children, The stunted father energy also suggests and reflects the stunted growth in the broader sense of the masculine energy and understanding available to us at present. Looking within our current paradigm one can see all manner of relatedness to women as a reflection of humanitys current internal 'undeveloped' masculine, the masculine though is continuing to be educated through the lessons we are learning, we are each personally responsible for changing this paradigm by changing our paradigm within, we will only act and 'do' in ways that currently are stunted as a consequence to the denial of the feminine our lower and higher feeling self and so the cycle spirals.

By not recognising and acknowledging the feelings that drive us and motivate us to say and do the things we do that leads to further harm and ultimatley self harm we perpetuate the cycle.

By shifting our awreness to our feeling selves and clearing the debris and pain at this level we are able to create a new paradigm whereby the masculine relates to others without judgement and harm to ourselves and to others.

We also allow the influx of higher qualitys of being into our life our soul qualitys, the higher refined energies of love and companionship in which we can express in the world.

Many blessings
Marce

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Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

Hi Margit, just another thing that came to me after was that in putting the father into your bed, gave me the impression that you are wandering what to do with him,, he cant stay here in the intimate levels of your self in the way that he is, To put it another way for now you have tucked away these damaged responses you have, either towards others or self, and are looking for a way to integrate it.
For now youve embraced him and thats enough but what next whats the solution? how are you going to work with this?

I hope this makes sense, and remember this is only my limited perspective of how I understand your dream.

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Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

Hi Marce,thanks for answering...and what do you think about the fact that the father/dwarf gets eerier later on in waking life and I preceive it sort of malign and connected to the rumpelstilzcen tale?Couldn't it be the other way round:that the teenage boy is my developing positive male energy and the dwarf is the negative animus/demon lover like...I cannot see it in the dream and protect him but my boyfriend and I have to sleep apart becuase of that.Let's say cannot connect really because the dwarf occupies the bed....Margit

Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

Hi margit
Just to respond to your question -
"Couldn't it be the other way round:that the teenage boy is my developing positive male energy and the dwarf is the negative animus/demon lover like...I cannot see it in the dream and protect him but my boyfriend and I have to sleep apart becuase of that.Let's say cannot connect really because the dwarf occupies the bed."

It most ceratainly could be, how do you feel about the way you understand it? does it srike a chord for you at a deeper level, do you feel ahh of course thats what it is, thats whats happening for me right now!, or do you still feel like your trying to put the diffrent shapes together so that they fit into a comprehensible pattern that you understand.

From looking at my own dreams when something clicks into place it really moves mountains for me so to say and there is a connection with what is happening right now, if im still having to shuffel around pieces then I know something isnt quite right or I havent connected with the understanding of the dream through the heart but only with my mind. The jiggling of elements in a dream to make them fit usually comes when we are trying to understand with the mind, dreams are not linear and not literal in the sense that no one element neatly slots into place before or after another, they are multidimensional and layered in many ways hence the varied schools of dream understanding. Engaging in ones dreams at the level of the heart brings recognition and understanding beyond the level of the mind. Feeling the dream is important as well as feeling the symbols and how they vibrate in your being connecting to them in this way brings up much unconscious material, thats why I find them so useful they help keep things real for me, they guide me to connecting with my feelings,attitudes and behaviour as well as the spiritual dynamics at play.

Another attribute that ive come to understand in dreams is that if I spend too much time with a symbol I lose the essence of what that original symbol was conveying to me, this ive found important and what the symbol gives on face value is what I work with.
The teenage boy what was the face value of this person conveying, and if you were to turn out some associations with this boy what would they be, Is he a happy mature student, good natured and healthy, or is in insecure maybe shy, comes from a broken home, low self esteem, troublesome even plays up in class cant settle.

When I read your dream I went with the energy of the dream that is too say what the teenage boy conveyed and 'MY' sense of things, and i got the impression he was angry with his father wanting to hurt him etc but that was just my sense of him.

Your sense of him as in the dream and the underlying associations you have of him in your waking life will give you more of an idea of what masculine energy he is conveying in you.

The boy energy seemed just frustrated with his fathers handicap, why was he strangling him in the dream, if you dont know that answer just go within and get a sense of his motivations his want to starngle his father whats the energy here?

What does the father speak of, symbollically that is, the dwarf symbolism, stunted masculine growth, is there a part of you that identifys with the energy of the teenage boy in response to some area of your life that isnt working out right now because of some sense of inadequacy 'short thin male'. im just going with what comes up for me here but asking yourself what is masculine about this man, or not?

Beds usually relate to the intimate layers within oneself and this is where he is in 'your bed' in these intimate layers asleep something your not conscious of in self.

And yes this has caused some seperation between you and your boyfriend in 'your house' (A House in dreams denotes ones psyche), its your inner boyfriend that masculine energy but he may portray something different here, what is his background how does he use his mind in his job? is he quite a rational person, I only ask this because I wander if he is reflecting some way in which you are trying to understand your self here, spare bedroom in a way you havent before 'spare' generally not used and bedroom symbollic of part of self that relates to ones dreams, guidance etc goes within.

what has caused this seperation in self though is ultimately the dwarf energy my first sense of this was to relate this (and because I know a little of your personal history) relate it in a way to your behavioural response in your relationship when overcome with feelings, this is what I 'saw' as the stunted growth of your masculine energy and this is what you still carry within the intimate layers of your self. The energy of the man in rumple what type of person was he what was his energy that you relate this dwarf person too, and how does that fit or tie into what is happening in your life?

As this is also what you have been focusing on recently, I would believe that there may be much unconscious work being done as well in your dreams.

As a result of working with this you are still looking for a solution to this very problem, which may not be a problem all the time only when you choose to focus and work with it. The rest of the time i would guess it is something you put to the back of your mind to sleep as does your trying to understand this as well, maybe when you go to work in the morning all awareness and work done on this is put aside, and you focus on your job and your life at work.

Im going back over a lot of things here but just to give you a sense of how I understood your dream, but its allways the dreamers call.

Working with the dream on waking is usually the best time as the feelings and energy is still very fresh in ones memory, then connecting with the feeling/thinking element of each symbol and listening to these elements play out in your psyche helps you to connect to the more unconscious dynamics at play within.

We live in a very reasoned world, science is making an exploration with reality by reducing it to its bare essentials, first the molecule then the elements then the atom then the protons neutrons and electrons then the quarks, the point im trying to make is the deeper you go into something the more unesscesarily complicated it becomes, if we try to apply the same logic when we delve into our dreams the symbols chop and change more associations, and finally were lost and far away from the meaning its meaning. We come up with something but if it still doesnt quite make sense than its a guide to say were maybe a little of track.

I hope this answers your question a little the energy of the man in rumple what type of person was he what was his energy that you relate this dwarf person too.

Blessings Marce

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Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

thanks again for your answer.There are many interesting points and I am learning alot.The teenage boy is fom a dificuly home situation but a good boy,let's say,but up to now very passive.So in the dream it was strange that he attacked the dwarf.It was as if it was a "new"thing in him to react. It was as if he "knew" more than me who the dwarf really was.I think i remembered the tale after so many years of not thinking in it because there is an affinity of the character in my dream.I cannot really explain it but there is a lot of energy in what I feel and even if I think that on one level your interpretation definitely is also true, there is a deeper layer where it clicks with my version,but is still very mysterious and I cannot see the whole picture.I suppose with dreams even opposite interpretations are coexistent and true on different levels.Yes,it is important to go back to the symbol but active immagination also is a powerful tool in my opinion as it draws from the unconscious directly as well.

as to the dwarf father...he is magical,eerie,from another realm,dangerous...he is not a normal handicapped father but a supernatural non human being,maybe not even the "real"father of the teenage boy sort of magical being which acts as a father and the boy won't accept that anymore,but nobody else notices...just he.I don't feel the boy is angry with a handicapped human father, he is defending against danger.
The dwarf in Rumpelstilzchen is very interesting as he helped the miller's daughter to spin straw into gold to please her father and king but then she had to give him two gifts and third one her firstborn child.This makes her react and look for a solution.When she guesses the real name of the dwarf(rumpelstilzchen)he disappears.So maybe naming,becoming aware of the impulses and forces that drive us makes them disolve and lose their power over us.This dwarf is quite magical too as he can transform straw to gold.I put the link of the story.
http://www.fln.vcu.edu/grimm/rumpeng.htm
all the best and I really enjoy listening to your ideas,it is very inspiring

Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

Hi Margit youve bought some very wonderful associations up here

"The Dwarf maybe not even the "real"father of the teenage boy sort of magical being which 'acts' as a father and the boy won't accept that anymore"

"I don't feel the boy is angry with a handicapped human father, he is defending against danger.The teenage boy is from a difficuly home situation a 'good' boy none the less".

Im just wandering here if this also relates to your past relationship with your father on some level? so just to summarize then

When our fathers arnt there for us at least from our own child/adolescent perception we become our own magical fathers as our own fathers are to us in a negative sense ie pretending to be a father to the best of their abilities, our inner father energy develops accordingly and also acts out in this way, which can be said also about the real father or not ie step father who acts like a father to create a relationship, pretends to be a father but hasnt truly connected with his own fathering energy, that energy that inspires confidence respect and security in a child etc. But on the outside everything is ok or is it?

The teenage boy adolscent from a difficult home situation is though, a good boy behaves well not angry but is defensive defending himself from some percieved danger from the acting father, real or not, any of these traits ring a bell in you?

Teenagers in dreams can also represent ones own adolscent energy, this response is there anywhere in your life that you act like this though is a new thing in you? what are you defending against what percieved danger of someone 'acting' to you about their feelings for you? is it triggering this response in self?

Often our parents tell us they love us as a child but how many times is that just words. As humans we sense all incongruencys, inconguent in the sense determined from what soemone says and what their body language is actually telling us we recieve the energy communication through the solarplexus chakra the gut, gut instinct of what is incongruent.

The father energy being 'acted' out in this way being complimented etc but really more preoccupied with work will be felt on all levels as an incongruency with the childs being which will shape all experiences in later life as well as attracting those experiences to them.

Im just going again with what comes up, Yes using active imagination is a great tool and naming the energy is to acknowledge it when we do that as you say it no longer has any power over us. I will check out the story thanks. Its also interseting that this dwarf resembles the energy that was utilised by the princess to please her father...

Best marce

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Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

Hi,Marce
Well,I had an interesting dream tonight which I associate(don't ask me why)with this dream and your interpretion in the beginning.Just wanted to post it as a feedback.
we were in a room and there was a strange animal sort of mixture between weasel and squirrel.it was cute but biting,and a little bit dangerous.I tried to catch it and put it in a place where it is safe and contained.Sort of big black plastic bassin with high walls so that it cannot jump out and run arround.I gave it food(little nuts,apples and all sort of stuff.And I don't know how it happened I wanted it have towater to drink and gave it water.However to my great anguish when I opened the bassin the next time to have a look at it it was cooked in the hot water.I didn't intend to kill it.It was an accident.I felt so shocked and sad.It looked like a little hamster so helpless and dead.Then, a boy near me(my brother,have no real brother though)said :look it still lives! and he takes the hamster and I see how it breathes.i feel so happy and relieved and try to heal and save it.

Funny dream,appreciate your ideas.Is this the dwarf again?.Seems as if this time I almost drowned it in hot water...what do you think?

Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

Hi margit

Since our our exchanges ive realised that ive been learning a lot about myself as well, I believe dream interpratation is a twofold process where by engaging in anothers dream one also engages in one in their own process hehe, I have also had similar relationship experiences in the past, alebeit my being drawn to your recent dreams, if to begin with only in an unconscious way, its truly wonderful to see who one attracts into their life in the variety of ways, to reflect back and initiate conversations that will take both partys in to the deeper realms of their psyche and spiritual life.

One thing I have started to look at is in how we make associations with symbols and I feel it might be useful to share this experience here for what ever reason, this morning on recalling my dream there was a female in the dream who I was attracted to when making associations with her I first went over what I saw in her that I was attracted to she was sexy, seemed confident and I felt she was attracted to me or would like to get to know me better etc these associations I had of her though were percieved and filtered only through my minds lens of perception and so still 'I' or the 'I' still felt a distance about what she represented for me the next part of what took place came then in a sense where I 'owned' this quality, the 'female feeling self' and was not of my perception of her, rather it was of an ownership of this quality in myself does that make sense?

The next part of the dream showed me how I was attempting to couple with this quality of personal power/confidence in self and where I was maybe uncomfortable with this in myself, as I was initially in the dream a little uncomfortable with her in knowing what to say (lol).

What is also interesting is that last night I met a woman who I was extremely attracted too sexy confident etc and there were moments where I encountered this same sense of being uncomfortable, though flirting with each other, what was for me then that uncomfortable moment was in my attempt to be comfortable in the personal power she projected, i Guess what im trying to say is that the experiences we attract into our personal lives may reflect in our dreams but only as a means of getting the same message accross about what is happening in the personal layers within self, the chicken and egg question what came first is allways going to flummox the reasoning mind as it is intself a paradox much of what zen meditation with koans, is based on takeing one beyond the experience of the mind beyond the filter through which we make asscociations, life and dreams are intimately intertwined and through which our souls messages can be heard in both if one pays attention enough. Just from observation of how our 'physical' reality unfolds we can see in all the symbolism the deepest layer of our own psyches. Ive highlighted the physical because I question is it really physical? or just an outward dream of our inner Selfs.

Any way ive gone completly away from what I wanted to say and I get the sense this is in some way a comment also to having just read yours and gerards discussion though i will have to go back and look at what triggered this train of thought.

The associations made within a dream help the dreamer to recognise unconscious aspects of self but are most effective when getting in touch and 'owning' the energy of self, not keeping it at a distance through ones own perception, almost like a becoming in some way to live more consciously from these dynamics. in doing so intergration also takes place, our energy is no longer bound up in keeping this 'stuff' locked up, split from, unconscious etc.

Your dream Just to start the ball rolling what is it you have been trying to heal and save, what part of you, your expression have you been keeping in a black barrel. The animals suggest some representation of your instinctual energy a blend of energys here, can you get a sense of this energy through your filtered perception, and does this differ in some way when you own it?

The symbol itself will generally have a twofold sense of understanding both what is being used to convey the meaning ie animals in your dream plus why these specific animals, and then their will be a more direct emphasis on how these energys manifest in self through your association of becoming and owning the energy at 'play' so to say that is the energy playing out.

This is all a very linear and rational approach that again is being filtered through the mind but also when looking through the mind in this way does lm realising now serve to add to the education and undersatnding of ones mind knowledge base which can then be redirected into ones growth and others.

However transcending the limitations of mind knowledge puts one in touch with the dream in a very different way bridging this mental framework of understanding puts one in touch with their deepest knowing which merges innerlife with outer life.

Best to you Marce

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Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

What is also interesting is that last night I met a woman who I was extremely attracted too sexy confident etc and there were moments where I encountered this same sense of being uncomfortable, though flirting with each other, what was for me then that uncomfortable moment was in my attempt to be comfortable in the personal power she projected, - just to edit the previous post That is the same personal power im trying to couple with in myself, in the same way that my dream highlights.

The other thing that came to me to add is that of how the mind chooses to see everything outside of oneself as separate and when making the association there is a pitfall of still maintaining this same sense of separateness which the 'I' percieves hence reducing the symbol to a filtered interpratation. This creating of distance is the same as the disatance we choose to create in our outer world that creates the illusion that we are separate from our environment.

Undersatnding dreams through the 'I' only serves us to see the dream through our filter of perception that we choose to see it through, and similarley seeing ones dream through the filter of others undersatnding of dreams also serves just to see the dream in that one light of consciousness.

So many schools of understanding dreams, each one a woven energetic pattern that we can weave into our own conscious understanding if we so choose, but limiting the filters serves one to understand ones dream in its fullest ie letting go of the shaped I of understanding and connectng within.

Best Marce

Opposties in dreams

Hi Margit

here is the post you made on another dream - as part of a discussion of opposite meanings in dreams:

"Hi what I mean is that maybe with "opposites" the same dreamsymbol can be true in two opposite ways that coexist.I see that in this dream Marce is interpreting for me about "the teenage boy who is strangling the father",two completely opposite interpretations of the dwarf /father sound true on two different levels.One is the dwarf as hurt positive energy to be healed and increased and the other as a maybe negative masculine energy which is eerie and sort of dangerous,a bit like a demon lover.God/devil...In my dream both make sense.What do you think of that?maybe you can post your opinion on the simultaneous true opposite interpretation at theteenage boy post in order not to stray from Eirene's dream too far."

As previously mentioned, dreams do deal in paradox and opposites - Marion Woodman uses a term 'Tension of the Opposites' ,,,, this idea is common. The constant motion of black and white in the ying - yang symbol. The dance of Shiva + Shakti ,,, the Universe is in cinstant motion. So we move from "either-or" thinking to "both-and" thinking; from an exclusive viewpoint to an inclusive viewpoint. We (the world) is seeing the efects of the "either-or", exclusivist thinking now ,,, it is Fundamentalism in any of its forms.

In dream? these themes are always there, encapsulated or acknowledged.
This is part of our learning frm dreams. It broadens out understanding of how the Universe is - it just is that way.
It is up to us to tease out the seperate threads and meanings and ,,, use this undrestanding to live more wisely..

All the best

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Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

Hi Justin and Marce and thanks for your posts.I am very busy at the moment and just wanted to drop this note to tell you that I read your posts and appreciate this very interesting communication.Marce, I have to reflect about your answer.I am happy to hear that both of us are in this learning process and thru sharing learn from each other.My best wishes Margit

Re: teenage boy is strangling his father(who is like a dwarf)

Hi Margit

This is a great dialogue you guys are having - it can take time for the meanings of dreams to be unravelled and understood.

A few point - Margit: I think it is important to take what the dream is trying to convey as intrinically trying to be helpful. Dreams are not out to trick or sabotage us : just the opposite, they can help us not to trick ourselves or sabotage ourselves.
I mention this because I sense that this may be a way that you 'opt out' or reason away things. The 'oh but couldn't it also mean ,,,, ' and so nothing happens or no deeper meaning is gained. The answer to this would be, 'yes, it could mean many things however given the context and feelings this is the most likely meaning - I'm going to go with that (while I keep the others as much lesser possibilities)'

AND

Jung and others have mentioned more than once - that once we see ourselves in the context of myth ,,, a real learning can happen. The myth can really tell us our story, help us to understand it transpersonally, and SHOW US THE PITFALLS + WAY OUT ,,,

stay in touch as you can
JC

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