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Weird, Vivid dream of being recruited into secret organisation

Hi all. I wonder if, collectively, you might all be able to help me work out what the following dream means. I've tried looking it up on various dream dictionaries but nothing really seems to fit...

The dream starts with me being chased to my mother's house (she's now dead by the way), although I don't know who is chasing me or why. When I get there my mum tells me that I'll be safe and she'll look after me, but I notice someone standing at the bottom of the garden and realise that they have already found me.

Not wanting to bring trouble on her, I leave only to get caught outside the front of the house. But the guy explains to me that they don't want to hurt me, but they need my help. At this point two women turn up and the guy begins to brief me. They are part of a CIA-style organisation and they are wanting to recruit me, because of what I know about conspiracy theories and the like, to infiltrate this group of criminals. I'm given a credit card, which I'm told doesn't have a limit to it, and the card is plain grey with just one long number sequence on it.

As part of the briefing the guy plays a video for me on his laptop, but I can't hear all of what is said as it is quite windy.

The dream then moves on and I find myself in a room, sitting at a table with members of this criminal gang and after a while one of the men turns to me and asks me about rope. Nothing in my earlier briefing prepares me for this so I try to bluff my way through it and start telling them about this new high-tech rope that I can get my hands on for them. They seem happy enough with my answer and then it's time to move on; as we leave the room I notice one of the guys is someone I actually used to go to school with and I hope he doesn't recognise me.

I then find myself heading into town to buy some new suits (with my unlimited credit card) as all I have to wear is the grey suit and black shoes that I have on; I also need to buy a suitcase. Looking around the shops I can't find anything that I like, but this is where I wake up and the dream ends.

So, any help trying to work this one out would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks

Alan

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 35, Hertfordshire, England

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? No

Re: Weird, Vivid dream of being recruited into secret organisation

Alan,
I sense the dream is trying to address inner conflicts that you may not want to confront. The credit card may symbolize your 'buying time' {buying on time}, again not wishing to confront inner conflict or pain that probably involved your mother at an earlier age {your childhood/adolescence}.

Your 'being chased to your mother's house ' is most likely is addressing some aspect of your relationship with your mother. Although she provides safety {or did when she was living} there are inner conflicts that threaten your tranquility in the present. Were you dependent on your mother when she was living? Were you close to her?

The whole scenario about the CIA organization also suggests a need or desire for protection. If these conflicts are exposed {caught outside the front of the house'} you would face painful emotions {your ego self doesn't want to confront these emotions}.

The rope would be a lifeline for your rescue. But again your are not willing or are ready to confront those conflicts that threaten you {I try to bluff my way through it}. You may be making excuses in your waking life so not to confront these inner conflicts {new high-tech ropehe doesn't recognise me}. Since the dream depicts the scene as being an old high school friend there may be an association to that period of time.

The last paragraph may be addressing your current state of being. Grey and black clothing, dull and not as happy as you should be. You can't seem to find that thing in life that would provide balance and harmony.

Look at the relationship with your mother and how that has affected your life. The thing that may be preventing you from a happy life may be those earlier experiences in life. That is often a norm and I can attest personally to that in my life. Seeking out the past and confronting the conflicts is the way to remedy those conflicts. Refusing to confront them makes it worse.

Gerard

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 57 Murfreesboro, Tn.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} M

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Re: Weird, Vivid dream of being recruited into secret organisation

Hey Gerard. Thanks for that. Shortly after my mum died (January 2005) I did undergo a course of hypnotherapy to help me deal with issues relating to my early childhood, but perhaps there are still some things that need sorting out...

Just to give you some more background info, my mum and dad split up in May of 1972 and I was born in November of that year. She never remarried or had any other partners so my sister and I grew up in a single-parent family. Back in the 80s, certainly here in the UK, there seemed to be a lot stigma attached to single-parent families; I guess what made it worse was that mum became disabled when I was about 7 and so she was unable to go to work and therefore we relied upon state benefit, which at the time, wasn't a huge amount, but we managed to get by the best we could.

Although I was close to my mum, I often felt that I was second-best to my sister.

I did well at school, although I was often bullied because of the clothes I wore or how my hair was cut and for many years I was quite a shy introverted person.

When I left school I worked in a variety of shops, which I found gave me some confidence, and then in my early twenties I got a job as an IT journalist, which helped with my shyness quite a lot; my best job came in 1997 when I became technical editor of a particular magazine and my confidence soared.

It was then around 1998, a year or so later, that I became very disillusioned with the world around me and began wondering if there was more to life than the usual day-to-day drudgery.

I am now happily married with a young daughter of my own (plus my wife's other two children).

At present I do have a number of health issues concerning my back which means I am unable to work, so again I find myself having to rely on state benefits. My wife is a full-time mum so neither of us are able to 'go out to work' to bring in a decent salary.

Right now I'm on anti-depressants and anti-convulsants (used in epilepsy to prevent seizures, but also useful in minimising nerve pain) although I can be in one sort of pain or another 24 hours a day: I wake up in pain, have various pains throughout the day, which limit what I am able to do, and even when I'm asleep my sleep is interrupted because of the pain in my lower back.

Does any of this help with decoding the dream more?

Thanks again,

Alan

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 35, Hertfordshire, England

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? No

Re: Weird, Vivid dream of being recruited into secret organisation

Sorry, forgot to add something...

I was always close to my mum, and she was always very supportive. I wouldn't necessarily say that I depended on her, as I was quite independent, but she was certainly always there whenever I needed help.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 35, Hertfordshire, England

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? No

Re: Weird, Vivid dream of being recruited into secret organisation

Alan,
Thanks for the detailed reply. I see real correlations between your waking life experiences and the dream symbols. Being chased is often an indication something is 'still' after you, long after the original experiences {childhood}. And I do believe the dream is addressing those childhood issues. The question is how does it affect your waking life in the present? Personality, how you act and react to different stimulus in everyday life, the causation's of how you confront life are all affected by past childhood experiences.

Your childhood experiences of being withdrawn and introverted remind me of my own experiences as a child. Being a true extrovert, living an introverted life is not conducive to good mental health. Although I grew out of much of my introverted ways by the time I was 20, it wasn't until I discovered Joseph Campbell and Carl Jung at the age of 42 that I finally discovered the root to the 'void' in my life. And that void was primarily because of a lack of fatherly love and acceptance. Plus having to grow up poor. If not for my heroic mother who sacrificed for her four children, I could very well be have lived a life of crime or at best as a non-productive life as a citizen. My childhood experiences were not the only reason for my actions but they set forth the pattern that led me to who I was up until my self discovery through Jung's Individuation Process.

Your dissolution in 1998 is understandable. It was about that time in my life that I began to seek answers. The closer we get to mid-life {35-55} the more we begin to look inward. Meaning becomes important. Yet social duty takes a great toll. Making a living is so much harder than it was just 30 years ago. And the more we have to put into doing that, the less time we have to concentrate on what truly makes us happy. Jung tells us it is in our creative Self that life takes on meaning. And in finding that creative Self we also discover a spiritual aspect {very often different from a religious experience}.

Do you have any hobbies or something that you truly love to do that fills your soul? I suggest you look to those creative aspects to help with your depression. Plus read those pages I have suggested {Individuation Process}. Jung has a lot to offer when seeking inner strength. My thoughts are everything is first psychological. The roots begin there. How the tree grows can be discerned by discovering the roots. It takes time but with patience and discipline you can find that path to a harmonious life.



The Meaning of Life - - "People say that what we're all seeking is a meaning for life. I think that what we're seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonances within our own innermost being and reality, so that we actually feel the rapture of being alive.".....Joseph Campbell

Hope this helps. If you have any comments or questions please feel free to post them here.

Gerard

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 57 Murfreesboro, Tn.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} M

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes


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