Hello..I've a very strange thing that has happened to me and my husband. It is very hard for me to even type this, as I cannot believe that either one of us could've dreamed of such things..but, here goes. My husband and I were talking about having wierd dreams sometimes and I told him I'd had one the night before and that it was very bizzare and disturbing! He said, me too..last night! It was bad! Then he began to tell me that he'd decided not to tell me about the dream, but he would now. This is where it gets scary! He said I dreamed of your daugther "Sissy"(which is not her real name) and my husband is her step father...anyway..I dreamed of here and we were in your bed and you were lying beside us and I was having sex with her. She did not protest and had nothing to say and niether did you. Almost before he could finish, I had to sit down..as I told him my dream the night before his. OMG! I dreamed of her too and we were in a room, I was aware of someone else in the room, maybe it was you (my husband) but, I too (ashamedly!) was touching my daughter and having oral sex with her..I was doing this to her. It was very brief and I recoiled in horror at what I'd even attempted. Again, she did not protest..nothing was said. Then I woke up and it bothered me all day and night. Until we talked about it today. We are both shocked and stunned and would NEVER do anything like this to our daughter. This is my second time to marry this man and we've been together for 10 yrs. We have a good relationship on one hand, but on the other, we have some serious problems. I deal with issues that are too deep and detailed to encompass here. He would have his view points and they would most probably be opposite to me. My husband is a good man, but can be very judgmental, cruel and angry sometimes. I am made to feel inadaquate and stupid at times and then at other times, I can do no wrong! I am truely his best and only friend..he would tell you that. This could all have something to do with the dream..stresses, anxieties, pent up anger and resentments, etc. (was a phychology major in college)and I am being treated for anxiety and remnents of bi-polar myself. So, I am no stranger to these things. But, for us to have the same type of dream and 1 or 2 nights apart..was way to wierd for even me!! My husband and I are Christians. He believes that it might be demon or devil related or something along those lines. He doesn't believe in mental illness persay..thinks that it is demon possession, a "sin" problem, etc. I agree with him on some levels, but on most, we do not. I just want to know what you think. I even think that this may be indicating some danger she might be in. She has had a rough time in the past and is on some med's for things, but is a bright and successful college student. Enough of my ramblings! Please respond, it would be greatly appreciated.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 49 Oklahoma City, Ok.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? no

Tami,
Let me ease your mind as I read through the first part of your post. Dreams speak in the language of symbols and metaphor. Although sex in dreams can represent actual sexual attitudes in the waking life, it very often symbolizes something else. Incest will often symbolize the following:

1} Unacknowledged aspects of self, particularly those that have not been explored as a result of limiting beliefs

2}A desire to integrate aspects of the incest victim into your own nature

It can also symbolize the union of opposites, a uniting of feminine aspects in your husband's masculine psyche, and the uniting of opposites of the masculine aspects in your feminine psyche.

You spoke of the opposites in the relationship between you and your husband. It may be the dream is using your daughter as the 'glue' that connects the two of you. Also if you look at the two possibilities I provided above on the meaning of incest, one is about limiting beliefs. You state your husband 'He doesn't believe in mental illness per-say..thinks that it is demon possession, a "sin"'. That fits with the 'limiting beliefs', he is focusing on moral issues when he should be accepting the possibilities of mental stress and anxieties. You share some of those views {which is opposite of the facts in the science of psychology}, thus you share the same metaphors in the dreams.

Your daughter in the dreams would be a surrogate or substitute for those limited beliefs. That would fit since, like you, she is on medications. Your husband, and perhaps yourself in a lesser light, believes this to be evil, so much so that is a sin on the level of incest. Your daughter in your dream would be a substitute for yourself in that the two of you share the same burden, and perhaps criticism from your husband, mental stress that requires medications.

Your husband's religious beliefs. Are they part of the problem?

So the crux of the dream is not the crime of incest but the crime of mental stress and medications. Your daughter is in the dream because each of you, you and your husband, share beliefs {although you may be merely following his actions and it is not a deep held belief as it is with him} that are similar.

Some advice, and I say this for the benefit of your future. Your husband needs to examine his belief system on medications and evil. The abusive attitude he sometimes displays is a sign of deeper psychological distress. If he believes mental disorders, even simple ones such as stress and anxiety, are the work of evil, there are great problems ahead for him and your family. You disagree on most issues. Do not be bullied or persuaded against seeking medical attention for your {and your daughter's} stress and anxieties. And do try to find ways to alter his attitudes. The danger you feel your daughter {intuitive feelings should always be given attention} may be from his attitudes more so than anything else. Pushing his antiquated beliefs onto her made be damaging to her psychological health.

And finally. You state you are being treated for anxiety and remnants of bi-polar. What are the sources for those conditions? Although there is usually a chemical imbalance that causes bipolar conditions, the underlying causes are more psychological than physical. The pent up anger and resentments you speak of. When did they begin? That is where you need to start in finding the root causes. Doing that is the best thing you can do to start a true healing process of the inner self. You have studied psychology. You know it is logical science and not something evil.

Here is a link to pages I created that may help with that healing process. It is what changed my attitudes, and my path in life.

The Individuation Process

Gerard

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 58 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes