I have a close friendship with a man I would like to be in a more intimate relationship with. I am frustrated by the slow speed at which that relationship is progressing and fear I am being delusional in thinking it will develop into the fully intimate relationship I want. I have decided to open myself to other possibilities and have re-opened an on line dating profile. I "met" a man I like and we are considering an actual meeting.

My 15 year old daughter is exploring relationships and her sexuality. I have a bit of anxiety around being a role model for her.

My dream starts out with me sleeping in my own bed (in waking life my bed is in my living room/dining room/kitchen). I wake up with the man (we'll call him TR) standing near the bed. It's still dark. He was supposed to come to visit, but was to show up later in the day. I was too tired to get up and couldn't quite wake up fully. I lifted the blankets on my bed for him to get in with me. He did, fully clothed. We held each other with my face buried in his neck. He smelled divine - a warm human smell combined with a slight earthy-woodsy smell.

The next image is of my 15 year old daughter looking out the window. She alerted me to 4 or 5 dead deer immediately if front of our house. (In waking life I live in a rural area where deer are not at all uncommon. It was as if these deer had been walking by my house and had been shot all at the same time). There were vultures and ravens feeding on the carcasses. This did not seem grotesque, just part of the circle of life and death.

In the next image I remember, my 18 year old son, my 15 year old daughter, TR and I are all sleeping outside in the snow. My son in a small tent, my daughter in a small igloo, TR and I in another small tent - more like a tarp spread out over us. My daughter complained to me that there was blood getting into her igloo. There was a river of blood through the middle of our "camp". I got up to build a small dyke in front of her igloo to keep the blood out.

I went back to the tent I was sharing with TR to find that he had enlarged it - he had used poles or sticks to make a structure. There was a candle or some kind of light shining inside. I felt welcomed and taken care of.

Upon waking I felt happy - glad to be starting a new relationship, hopeful. Later, upon re-telling the dream, the dead deer and blood haunted me. I had a foreboding feeling.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 50, Washington State, USA

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I'm assuming that TR is the man on the dating site, not the one with whom you had a crush on.

The fact that you were too tired to get up to get him, tells me that you are playing a more passive role in the relationship. His coming there early may say that you want him faster than your conscious mind may expect. There is diffidently more of a mental connection with him keeping his clothes on. The woodsy scent... from the rest of the dream it seems that you love nature, so that scent may just accent how you feel about him.

The dead deer were pointed out to you by your daughter. Deer are graceful creatures that could represent happiness, perhaps what you had with your past husband. It seems that your daughter may be someone who is trying to remind you of the last time you were in love, being a vulture that is picking at that. The fact that you see it as a natural thing tells me that you are ready to move on.

Next, snow is frozen water, or frozen emotions, as I have been told on the first post I put here. It feels to me that perhaps you have trouble conveying your emotions to your daughter, especially since she housed herself in and ice shelter rather than a tent. She complains of the river of blood. This river could symbolize many things. Blood could be a symbol of menstruation that begins in puberty, but could be explained as a rush of hormones. You make a dyke in front of the igloo instead of telling her to make a tent, which could be your subconscious telling you to talk more about her feelings rather than stop them.

Finally, TR has enlarged your personal tent, which may symbolize how you think he'll improve your life.

To summarize the parts you were weary of: The deer are in the past, and the blood is more about hormones, not death.

Nice dream,
Michael

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 18 in Indiana

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Lynn,
I sense the dream is about your desires, natural and emotional, of being in a relationship, and the effect it would have on your children if you were to enter into a relationship. And some concerns about your daughter's exploring. Since both children {budding teenagers} appear in the dream and not just your daughter {more than just addressing your daughter's exploration} I see that as being a part of your unconscious concerns.

Being in your own bed suggests you feel secure in your surroundings {secure within your own body and good about who you are}. The 'waking up' is probably addressing those natural 'human' desires for companionship {including sexuality}, the natural unconscious desires {It's still dark}.
I'm a bit confused as to which man it is you are calling TR.

I am assuming TR is the man you wish to have a more intimate relationship since in the dream he is 'supposed to show up but later in the day'. And the fact you are too tired and couldn't wake up fully seems to be addressing the slow evolution of that relationship. You 'offer' him 'intimacy' but he remains fully clothed, an indication of your feelings toward his attitude. The neck represents the relationship between the mind/mental and the body/physical. You want the physical but he seems more interested in being friends.

The next part of the dream seems to be addressing her 'view' of the world as she matures {looking out the window}. This is reinforced with the dream statement "just part of the circle of life and death". The dead deer may be representing your view of your daughter as it has to do with her loss of innocence and natural beauty, which is what you are afraid of as she enters the world of feminine attractions. Your own experience in life probably has to do with the 'vultures' she can expect to encounter as she matures. This is a natural fear for any mother whose daughter is at that 'age' and stage of life {15 going on 30}.

These parts of the dream are addressing the true and natural emotional attitudes you possess concerning actual waking life events.

Now the dream changes to addressing future concerns about a relationship and how it not only affects you but your children. And also still addressing concerns about your daughter's situation.
Being outside in the snow may indicate inner inhibitions of including TR into your family. It may cause divisions {separate tents and igloo}. Blood is often symbolic of 'emotional energy. The river of blood would be the emotional energy that is 'flowing' within you. It also may be addressing the inclusion of any sexual activities that you would introduce into your family life that may be passed onto your daughter {build a small dyke in front of her igloo to keep the blood out}. This would probably be addressing not only sexual aspects but emotional aspects as well {the emotional influence of relationships on your daughter}.

The last part of the dream seems to be once again addressing desires and the lingering possibility {light shining inside} that TR would some day 'build' on the relationship. This is a strong, and natural desire, that makes you would welcome and all else would fall into place.

The waking feelings are always important. The optimism is indicative of your personality and positive outlook on life {being in your own bed}. The foreboding feelings which came later are 'mindful' concerns about your children and how a new relationship would fit in with your present life. This may seem like a negative but I see it as a mature way of addressing life as it is and going beyond just the emotional desires that often take control of the logical mind. Both address your personality and both are positive aspects {even though the 'dead deer ad blood' were foreboding}.

Summary
Dreams address the emotional attitudes of the dreamer at the time you have the dream. This dream reflects your emotional attitudes. Often there is an expectation of dreams to provide clear answers to some particular emotional concerns. Dreams help sort out what is true and what are conscious misconceptions. Original dreams {this first dream} will lay out the conditions of your emotional life with subsequent dreams providing deeper insights to those emotions as well as possible solutions to any conflicts of those emotions. Although dreams seldom 'predict' future events they do help clarify your true emotional outlook toward those events.
This is the way of dreams.

Let me know your thoughts to my suggestions. If they fit with your life I would suggest you pay attention to future dreams to help provide insights to future decisions. What dreams are really good at is taking 'intuitive' feelings and highlighting those emotions. Intuitiveness provides real insights that the objective mind often misses. If TR is not serious in his 'intent' {or your wishful desires} then intuitively you may sense this in his attitude. Your dreams will reveal such attitudes and can help in processing how to address future actions.

gerard

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 58 Murfreesboro, Tn

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Comments on Michael's interpretation.

Although I see some differences in the dream than does Michael it does not mean his observations are wrong or do not apply. His observations could very well fit as well as those that I offered. Dreams address many aspects of the dreamer's psyche and often address the different aspects using the same metaphors and symbols. The good thing about Michael's interpretation is he ventured to offer one. Practice makes perfect and at 18 I see his interpretation as a logical perspective to Lynn's dream.

gerard

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 58 Murfreesboro, Tn

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Thanks to both of you, Michael and Gerard.

I'm sorry I was unclear on who TR was in the dream. He is the new guy, the one I'm contemplating starting a relationship with.

Both interpretations have helped me clarify my feelings.

Of course - TR showed up before he was scheduled to - I'm not quite ready. I have woken to the desire for companionship and sexual intimacy. This is not new, but maybe in a new context. I'm thinking that my raising the blankets for TR is more about me being receptive than passive (in waking life I've been thinking a lot about those qualities in regards to my feminine nature). I wonder if TR's clothes might be a barrier - wanting to make the mind/body connection (neck) before jumping right into the physical.

Gerard, I am particularly appreciative for showing me the obvious - that my daughter looking out the window is about her view of the world. In waking life she has always been very insightful about relationships. I both value her insights and am concerned about the kind of role model I am for her. That she was pointing out the string of dead deer to me makes me think she was pointing out the string of my past relationships, (thanks Michael). It could also be her loss of innocence - also something in the forefront of our lives.

I'm still not sure about the vultures. I read in one dreamwork source that vultures could represent selfishness - taking from others in order to boost one's ego. The vultures could symbolize, as Gerard suggests, the vultures my daughter can expect to encounter as she matures. They could symbolize transformation, or as Michael suggests, moving on. They also could represent my wanting to get involved with TR as a way to boost my ego. It's the physical intimacy that's lacking, and what I'm hoping to get. I imagine on some level I want to prove to myself that I can still attract a man physically.

Gerard, I think you're right on about the rest of the dream. Thanks Michael for the additional insight of redirecting the river of blood/life/passion rather than trying to stop it or cover it up. Yes, I do think I need to talk to her in a different and more open way about her sexuality and relationships.

Again, thank you both for you time, energy and insights. I've been doing dream work since I was about 15. Sometimes it takes fresh, experienced and knowledgeable eyes to help me see even the obvious. My dreams are guides for helping me know what's in my heart and head - to help decide what actions to take in waking life.

My Best,
Lynn

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 50, Washington State, USA

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