This was a strange dream

I was at home with my daughter and grandson, --one of my real neighbors (not one I really like) was renting a room from me and we were sitting on his bed watching tv when the air got still--like the quiet before the storm--I called my guy up and he told me that I should try to get to high ground being it felt like it would feel before a big wave came in and would flood--I told him I thought that we were high enough and not near the ocean--but he felt we needed to get out of there and to higher ground
When my daughter-her son and I went to leave we heard gun fire and realized someone(or more than one) was shooting and killing ppl--we went into the safe room in the basement and hid--they didn't know we were there--I had tried to get my tenant into the safe room but he wouldn't come in--I could hear them saying that they were going to kill him--the one wanted to just shoot and the leader said he had to be de-capitated to make sure he was dead
Then someone put tear gas into the house--a small amount got into the safe room but we were ok
The next part of the dream I'm in my guys car--he is driving around all kinds of downed branches--we are about ready to stop at a stop sign and we see a big black bear running with a male teen in his mouth--flopping like a cat with a mouse--he drops the kid and I tell my guy we need to call 911--at that time we must have a police ban radio in the car and hear someone had called--they are warning ppl not to get out because the bears father is on the lose also and protecting his (bear) son--as we make a left the bear comes running behind us and picked up the kid and dragged him disappearing in the woods
We continued up the road around downed trees and there was still branches coming down sp we decided to turn around and go to a restaurant that we knew everyone at--when we got there we saw some ppl we knew and ordered to go-- a girl around 11 that knew us was with her mom and she gave my guy some corn muffins she had baked--my guy then asked me to go outside with him while we waited for our order--he had his hair slicked back--he then asked me to marry him--I told him that I didn't allow myself to go there because I knew he didn't want to get married--he looked at me with sad puppy eyes like he couldn't beleive I said that and that he really did want to get married--I thought about it and told him yes I would--but I still felt like maybe it wasn't real--he gave me a ring that had a pink stone in it--I told my daughter that He had asked me and she told me that she didn't know if it was a good thing because she thought he was a bit rigid--I asked her what made her think that she told me that he got on her a bit about how she took care of her car (he is a mechanic)

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Peggy,
I apologize for not getting to your dream. I am in the middle of a very large work project {the social dragon calls} and have to put all my energies into that. My intuitive mind is neil and to try and provide a clear thought to your dream won't be an injustice. I will provide an interpretation in tomorrow {Saturday}. I will be finished with my project today.

gerard

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no problem--we all have things to take care of

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I hope all s ok with you and you will be able to interpet this dream

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I guess it won't be don't

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Peggy,
I sincerely apologize for not providing an interpretation to your dream. I thought I had gotten all of the backlog but I overlooked yours and did not realize it until your recent post. I promise to give an interpretation first thing Saturday morning.
Again my apologies.

gerard

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Peggy,
A strange dream to pin down. Let me make a statement and get your response and go from there.

Could this dream have something to do with aspects of yourself that you are not comfortable with and at times have a hard time accepting? Something that you do not like about yourself? It could involve the past, even childhood, or could have started earlier in life. It may be about experiences that make it hard for you to enter into a serious relationship. Something that makes you feel inadequate.

Let me know what you think of the above. Perhaps that will help clarify some of the 'strangeness' of the dream.

gerard

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Not sure-I am an incest survivior and ACOA--that may have something to do with it--I do have trust issues

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Peggy,
Thanks for the follow up post. My impressions were the language of the dream could be associated with physical abuse {as well as psychological}, but the dream language did not spell out in clear terms that was the case. Most often victims don't use the incest word and instead use physically abuse. The dream sentence 'we were sitting on his bed watching tv when the air got still--like the quiet before the storm' presented the first clue to the possible association. And the 'girl around 11' pointed to something that seemed hidden even from the dream narrative. Incest is often a 'hidden' part of one's life. Although many dreams about physical abuse provide clearer language to 'child abuse' this dream was less direct. Something about the dream that lead me to post my thoughts in my original interpretation {one of those 'feelings' that I often have}.


Issues of trust could be expected from such emotional experiences {my statement "Something that makes you feel inadequate"}. Do you have problems in relationships due to trust? There may be concerns, real or unreal, of your own daughter being abused {'he got on her a bit about how she took care of her car (he is a mechanic)}. That is where the dream left off. Have you had other dreams since you can remember?
And, what is the relationship between your daughter and bf like? I am very big on 'intuitive feelings'.

gerard

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My daughter is 27 and she and my BF have a good relationship--he has only been in her life for 3.5 yrs--she was 20 when her father and I divorced--She is visiting a friend of hers in TX--her friend and her friends 11 yr old are also incest surviviors--My daughter is a single Mom and lives with me--needs to get a job and my BF has mentioned it to her and I also feel the same

Trust issues--oh yeah--but actually dealing better than I ever have before

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Peggy,
Your daughter needing to get a job and the admonishment by you and your bf that she should may fit with the 'he got on her a bit about how she took care of her car'.

And it is great news that you are doing well with 'trust' issues. It may demonstrate you are overcoming those childhood issues that caused the trust issues to begin with. For many that is the most pressing problem since the deep seeded experiences from childhood are not often recognized or overcome. One step at a time and eventually you will be in that place of trust that you should be. Especially with having support from a partner who is caring and understanding.

Now only if you can get your daughter to find a job. If it helps I have read {and have experiences in my family} that grown children today still rely heavily on their parents. You are not alone in having to help raise an adult child and grandchildren. But as all good mothers would do, you do it with love {with the hope they soon find their own way}

gerard

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I do know the child thing--I have an associates in Social Sciences and that was one thing we discussed--partly due to the fact that a High School Diploma is no longer good enough and a College Degree is required putting kids out of the full time work force longer

JS= my daughter
KS= daughters friend
AS= daughters friend's daughter

KS had told JS when JS told her that she needed to get AS into therapy to deal with the incest she survived--KS told her that she had put the incest she survived behind her and out of mind--they will not even let her talk about it--it is like the old family secret come back to haunt us when we have grown so much as a society--they do keep her away from the family memeber that performed the act
JS saw all that I went thru when all came down on me 8 years ago and has tried her best to help KS--but KS and her husband don't want to listen(hear) it and the last time JS went to TX she came back troubled for the way it was being handled

My currant BF has his own trust issues--but we seem to work thru both of ours most times and a free to express outsleves without feeling judged--a good thing--that is the reason that I'm divorced--my ex couldn't do it

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Peggy,
It is sad news to hear KS won't talk about her issues with incest. It will reside in her unconscious psyche and most likely have real emotional and psychological implications for the rest of her life. Your own experience of 'it all coming down on you' is an example of what happens when such experiences are not confronted and put into its proper place of healing.

Is AS a victim also? I am not quite clear to her experiences and her therapy needs. And what about the relative who committed the 'crime'? Keeping 'her' away from the person is absolutely necessary but is this person capable of harming others? That would worry me.
And KS being able to confront the person. That may eventually require closure. Self denial can be dangerous in such situations. Not only to KS but also AS. Is that why AS needs therapy?

One thing I have surmised in the many personal contacts I have had in my life concerning the psyche. We all have childhood issues. Yours is to an extreme but the lasting results into adulthood very common. Your bf probably can trace his 'trust' issues to childhood also. I see a lot of dream posts, that depict actual personal experiences, that deal with such childhood issues {often a dream will focus with a dream statement such as 'an experience when I was 4 or 5 years old' or 'I was in my childhood home' that relates back to actual childhood experiences}. For most, acknowledging the emotional trauma is the first step on the road to healing. I am often surprised how many people do not realize the associations. Of course you know that from personal experience, what must be done, and having studied the psychological factors will recognize others who are in the same boat.

Communication. A necessary tool in a successful relationship. Being open with each other is hard for some. Your education is probably very helpful in the success you are experiencing in your relationship. Does your bf ever remember any of his dreams. They can be very revealing.

gerard

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