This dream has my now ex-partner and 14 month old son in it....

In the dream I was living with both of them (at my current address). There was a television announcemet from the "authorities" that "everyone" had to evacuate their homes immediately. (I am not sure who everyone was, although the announcement appeared to have the severity of some world crisis - like in War of the Worlds). My partner and I had literally minutes to pack a bag and get out of the house to escape to some destinaton that the authorities had set up for us. (I don't know what the threat actually was, but the feeling was that we were never to return to the house again.)

I had the task of packing my bag (my partner appeared to have either packed a small number of things for himself...or did not care to do so; it was not clear). I became anxious when I looked across the road and saw the neighbours who seemed perfectly prepared for this emeregency; they had a neat looking bag and a water supply on a trolly and were in the process of evacuating. My partner seemed preoccupied with this and went outside to talk to them.

My anxiety increased as I was left with the task of thinking what the most important things to pack for myself to face this emeregency. I became pre-occupied with the fact I was menstruating and, in addition to a few other clothing items, made taking 'feminine hygiene items' my priority - as the realisation that without life might be embarressin entered my head. I also thought that in this type of emergency I would be unlikely to get any more.)

I then became angry that I was not getting any help from my partner, especially as I was then left with the task of packing items for my son.

The dream ended with me thinking about what to pack for my son and feelings of anxiety about how ill prepared I was for what was happening.

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(I'm guessing this dream relates to my recent separation from my partner; but I'm hoping for a more subtle interpretation than that....)

With thanks

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 40 Sydeny

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

Anna,
If you put the dream into a context of your own life experiences it may provide insights to the dream message. It starts off with you and your family. There is a crisis. And a war. You are leaving that house where the 3 of you lived, never to return again. Does that fit with the current relationship with your ex? The urgency of the evacuation may represent the urgency you felt for a need to leave the 'war' that was about to come {with your ex}. It may be there was not an original intention of separating forever {from your ex} and that is why you left with him in the dream.

Then there is the packing of your bags. I see this as representing the emotions. he is less concerned, or unable to show his emotions {packed a small number of things}. Te neighbors tidy preparations may represent how you wish the relationship with your ex should have proceeded [was there animosity over the breakup?}. You partner is preoccupied with outer things, you more centered on the emotional aspects.

You are left to make your own choices {he is no longer with you}. The emotions are flowing {menstruating}. Not getting 'any more' feminine items may represent an unconscious fear of being on your own, having to deal with life and emotions all by yourself.

The anger is probably real. No help emotionally from him. It is now and your son.

The anxiety feelings, again being on your own. Were ill prepared when the breakup occurred?

The emergency in the dream. Was there some urgency to the breakup, something that may have been a catalyst to breaking off the relationship? Something perhaps he did that was a final straw?

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 59 Murfreesboro, Tn.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

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With thanks...yes, seems all to fit. A)My ex is not concerned with feelings but only the external appearance that everythngis still ok, and indeed, has difficulty expressing any emotion. And B) yes there was a crisis that precipitated the break-up.

I have been ill-prepared in terms of the demands of settlement; trusting when I shoudn't have etc..., And, the emotion linked to being a single Mum is new and disorienting to say the least.

Can I ask this question about this "type" of dream - just for the sake of intellectual interest? What would be the point of this dream psychologically speaking? That is, my first response to the dream was that it "simply" parallels my separation story. But what is the point of a dream that refelcts what you already know....or do I not know it so consciously - as indeed looking after my son seems to take up time and emotion that requires me to repress the reality of my feelings. Is the purpose of the dream therefore a "release" of what in my day to day existence I do not have time to acknowledge or work on?

cheers

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 40 Sydeny

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

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Anna,
Good question. And your observation that the dream was reflecting what parallels your waking life demonstrates Jung's assertion that dreams do compensate what we already know. But why rehash what has already occurred?

One reason is to amplify what is out of balance in the dreamer's life. It may be for you not being unprepared as a single mum causes an imbalance within the psyche affording the emotions to overwhelm the waking mind and taking the focus away from the objective level thus making it more an emotional issue. The dream focuses on an objective level rather than a subjective level {the ego does that} so to counter balance the ego's subjective focus {on the emotions}. Your dream would be an attempt to put your mind on what is necessary to live your life with a positive attitude rather than let your emotions overwhelm you and cause more emotional instability.

Another reason dreams use compensation is the dreamer is often unaware of the unconscious aspects that often control the waking life. If there is too strong an emotional reaction to a situation and the dreamer is unaware of it the dream will tend to focus on that aspect in order to help the dreamer realize the strong emotional response.

And thirdly dreams revisit the waking life experiences so the dreamer does indeed better understand what is occurring in the waking life. But it does so with the bias of the ego. As Jung put it in his Collected Works Volume 10:

“Dreams are impartial, spontaneous products of the unconscious psyche, outside the control of the will. They are pure nature; they show us the unvarnished, natural truth, and are therefore fitted, as nothing else is, to give us back an attitude that accords with our basic human nature when our consciousness has strayed too far from its foundations and run into an impasse.”

The above paragraph itself is a good explanation for the process of compensation of dreams. Impartial, unvarnished, outside the control of the will, providing a clear view of what the life really is and not the biased view of the ego.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 59 Murfreesboro, Tn.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes