Sorry that i come with my dreams again and again, but i'm really eager to find out what they are trying to show me...i got the feeling they're all connected and that every dream is trying to tell me the same thing but in another way because i still don't seem to know..

Cockroaches

I'm on vacation with a woman (i know her from a past holiday). We share the bedroom. At some point she's leaving the room and does outside. While leaving she asks me what i bought for dinner and i tell her 'broccoli'. I can hear her making noises about it...noises which explain to me that she doesn't want to eat broccoli. I don't understand that she doesn't like it. Later she's back. It's bedtime...though still daylight. (no curtains)
While i am walking towards the bed i suddenly notice there are lots of big cockroaches on the ceiling. I hope they won't fall on me while i'm sleeping. I study them for some time and notice that one of them has feelers on his head. The others don't have them. I find that i'm mostly scared of the one with the feelers.

Wallet
Still on holiday i'm in an unknown street with an unknown woman, though friend in the dream. We need money so we stop at some atm's. We both take another atm. I put my pass in. While getting money i notice a guy with girlfriend behind me. The guy starts talking to me. Then he starts pulling my headphones of my ears/head. (i didn't know i was wearing these)He puts them on the atm and then leaves with his girlfriend. I watch them walk away. When i turn back to 'my' atm i notice that my wallet is gone. I'm panicking a little, tell it my friend and then the thought comes up that pulling the headphones of my ears was just a way of distracting me so he could steal my wallet. I look if i can still see him but he;s out of sight. Later i'm in a room and see my wallet lying on a cupboard. I start feeling very ashamed. I must have totally forgotten that i'd left it there. I'm a little angry at myself, knowing that i always say that in first instance i trust everyone. Dissapointed now in myself for having lost my trust in the other..

Test
I'm sitting in a classroom full of students. We're there to take a test. In front of me, on a desk, there are grey papers full of questions and i start trying answering them. While busy doing this i notice a guy sitting left from me. There's a curtain between us, but the curtain has an opening in it and i can see the guy looking at me and my test.
For some time i'm totally into the test. I arrive at a question which i then do not read on the paper but takes me into a little scene. I see 2 women sitting on a bench. (one of them is my collegue in rl) Unfortunetly i forgot what happened then, but at last i arrive back at the question on paper, finding me staring at the possible answers to that question from the scene. I don't know the answers...hesistating between two answers, when i see the person sitting right from me. I recognize her...a friend from my childhood years who was very good at learning. I see her test is not on paper but on cd. She bends over to me and tries to whisper the right answer to me. I tell her that she shouldn't do that, that i don't want to get help with this test, knowing it isn't right what she's doing...though also knowing that it's coming right from her heart. I sort of push her away. But i now know the answer and know that what i would have picked was the wrong one. The right answers was something with believe/faith/religion.
I go on with the test, notice that there's only half an hour left and i'm afraid i won't finish the test on time. I see people leaving the classroom already, while i'm still having a really hard time. Then, looking for the next question i see i just answered the last one. I'm surprised. I thought the test would have 100 questions, but it only has 69. I walk to the teacher in front of the class and hand him my answers. I don't feel all that good; glad i finished it just in time but feeling like i have failed. I sense that the classroom behind me is empty and i don't understand that all the other students didn't have so much difficulty with it as i did.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 36 netherlands

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Hi Mask

Cockroach

I get the feeling the cockroaches are related to things that are bugging you. The ones you are particularly scared of are ones with 'feelers' or feeling. Ones with emotional attachments.

Notice also that this dream again involves beds, the same as the attic dream. Could this be related to your dream analysis as a symbol of the link between the conscious and unconscious, and your hope that these issues that bug you will not influence your dreams? I also think this may be addressing dream issues in relation to the vacation, the vacation from the real world? A good symbol of dreamings in my own mind.

I haven't got my head around the brocolli reference yet, perhaps related to trees, knowledge of nature or something. I am guessing it could be related to what you want to learn from your dreams, rather than the cockroaches that infest your house (metaphorically speaking).

Wallet

As for the wallet dream, it seems sketchy at the moment, but what it speaks to me of is losing your personality / losing yourself for a moment. Since the wallet is where we store our personal identification, I could see it as a symbol of our id. The money, our self-worth. The dream itself seems to be about getting self-worth from a source, but losing the self.

At first this would have been blamed on someone else, perhaps related to love in the symbol of the lovers / couple. Someone who opened up your ears / awareness of the outside world? Or perhaps plugged you into the source / sense of self worth (plugging into atm). It is then that you feel you have lost your personality or your self, and blame a lot of this on this lover after they disappear.

But you come to realise it was you who took your personality away all along, and this realisation makes you feel ashamed for the way you disrespected the lost lover after they were gone.

Test

To me the test is addressing something that you are struggling to learn (about yourself?). It could be in relation to rational / intelligence, grey paper being grey matter = brain? Also the presence of the man behind the curtain seems to me to be alluding to the animus? He is behind a curtain, can not help you, there is no communication yet, but you are aware of him as you can see him watching you. The part that you are struggling with may be in relation to faiths / beliefs / religion. It would seem your unconscious is saying you are going down the wrong path, but also that you want to figure this out on your own, don't want the help of your friend.

In the area of your beliefs are you surrounded by people who have hardset beliefs or religion whilst you are perhaps more of a wanderer, with no set belief that you follow? Hence why you are struggling where everyone else is finishing this test with ease?

Those are my thoughts. Hope it helps a bit.

Sweet dreams,
Rook

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 28 - Perth, Western Australia

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Hi Rook,

thank you very much for all your thoughts. They are very helpfull! I started a reply before this one, but the writing became so slow that i start a new, shorter one with an overall conclusion...for now..

All three dreams seem to show me how i'm thinking about some things.

The 'noises' the holiday girl made, in which i recognized that she doesn't like broccoli. She is me, so the broccoli stands for something i don't like. It makes me think that maybe it's about that it's oke to sometimes say 'i don't like that'. Maybe it's about saying 'no'.

In the Wallet-dream i felt ashamed that i hadn't trust the guy at an instance. He is me, so i think this means i don't trust myself..And i think that is where your self-worth comes in place. I have faith in other people, but why not in myself?
For my study to become a coach i have to learn to become congruent...to live out and show what i believe in. And as long as don't do that, that is showing of having no faith in myself...not trusting myself. And there goes the self-worth i guess.
And, you are right there, a part of my self-worth i lost in relationships.
What i find funny...i read your thing about the lover...there's this guy who i liked very much who somehow had opened my eyes (ears)...it was after having talked with him a couples of times i decided i was doing something very wrong...it was then when i decided to get help to find myself (and selfworth) again. I call it funny, because last night that same guy showed up in a dream. He had been a patient, but recovered and then he was waiting to leave, healthy again. He was reading a book. I was watching him from a distance asking myself if he would notice me, but he was to busy reading. At some point i wanted to go and bring him a cup of coffee, but when i finally had the guts to do so i noticed he had left and someone else was sitting there. Of course, he again is me...the coffee i think is symbolic for trying to 'awake' something in me. Reading a book while waiting...again that passive mode.

The test i think is my life. Sometimes, when things feel hard, it feels like life is testing me, knowing it's nothing but me who's making life that hard.
The right answer in the test...believe, religion...Yes, lots of people around me think different then i do or: i think different. Lots of them just seem to live without thinking to much, but i've always been an analyzer, always taking part but also 'flying above' to try to see and understand 'the whole'...like i want to understand what life is really about. I think i can't ever change that or even more: i don't want to change that...because that is, besides making it more difficult, what makes life interesting for me. But on the other hand...the guy reading the book while waiting...being passive and only observing...maybe even more can be learned when getting out of the mind off into the world.

But all those things: the saying 'no', the selfworth...i think they point in the direction of being congruent...something i need to show/possess when i'm a coach/counsellor. To reach that point i need to be aware of what i really believe in and then show the things i believe in and stand for to the outside world. As long as i won't do so i'm not being congruent...and this again i think has a lot to do with selfworth.

The cockroach with the feelers. Somehow i know i am a real feeler, but afraid to show it to the outside world. In the dream there's only one cockroach showing its feelers, while in fact all coackroaches do have feelers. Maybe that is what it's showing also...the fright of being the one and only or the first to show them, knowing that everyone has them...but lots of people are even more afraid of showing them or even are unaware of the fact that they have them.

I think that right now it's time for me to take that cup of coffee and awake my Self...The dreams show that the patient has recovered or has died (change), time to take it out into the real world instead of, like you wrote 'keep dreaming of it in my own mind'.

Thanks again!

Greetings,
Mask

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 36 netherlands

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Well, today, as out of nowhere, 'a lot of unkown bugs showed themselves to me today'..with a dream at night at first which almost seems to be a premonition.

In the dream i was walking with my 'boss'. We were going to have a formal conversation about work, workingplace etc. But instead of going to her office we went somewhere outside, went through a cafe where she offered me an alcoholic drink. I refused this and found it strange that she, so it seemed, drinks alcohol during working time. To her it seemed very normal and daily routine. Then we went to the terrace besides the cafe and sat down. The terrace was crowded with people, sitting on wooden benches at wooden tables with yellow parasols. It was a warm and bright sunny day. After some talking, which seemed more of friendly talk then a formal working conversation. Then i get stung in my belly and while this happens it's like i'm sitting on the ground. I see a wasp, dying. I got stung by it. My boss immediately comes rushing to me, takes the angel out of my belly and starts sucking the venom out. It all happens very fast and i'm totally taken by surprise.

Well, then today in real life. I had an appointment with my boss for a working conversation...a formal one. But, to my surprise, very soon the conversation started to take a whole other direction. I found myself crying in no-time..crying of totall relief. I think (know) she discoverd 'the sting of the wasp' and i think she still doesn't know what she really has done for me today...
Today to me shows again that the right people show up/ make themselves known at the right time...wow!

It was nice to find out that what i dicovered in my dreams (what i did write yesterday)...about ít being oke to say no and about the feeling of being ashamed of myself. For some time i was feeling huge resistance but till today i didn't know what the real cause of this was...

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