In last nights dream i was in some sort of a room.
At some point 'he' comes in and stands left of me, right beside me. I feel he's curious about how things are going. 'How things are going' is about this room/space i am in; i've been redecorating it. Besides being surprised i most of all am very happy to see him; happy, because his showing up seems to show he is still interested in me. It gives me a warm and good feeling.
So i show him how i changed things. Just like him i then am watching the room and see myself and my mum finishing putting new wallpaper on the three walls (left, right and back wall; the front of the room is open). The wallpaper is white, blanc paper. He responds to it and i remember him saying 'indoctrinate'. I laugh when i hear him say this word and tell him that's not the right word for it and then say the right word (can't remember this word). I didn't find 'indoctrinate' not the right word because of the word/meaning of it itself, but he really had choosen the wrong word. It felt like he totally didn't know what word to use to describe what i showed him. I felt he was surprised by what he saw.
Then he tells me he has to go to work. He appears to be working in the candy store just in front of my room. He leaves and i decide to visit him later that day.
The room/space is full of things after he has left. Lots of shelves packed with things (don't know what things). It looks like this room is my own store/shop. Later on i decide it's time to visit him, but first want to change clothes. I search through some clothes that are in my shop. It seems like i am having a real hard time deciding which clothes fit the visit, but after a long time i finally seem ready.
I walk out my room, walk over a little pavement and enter the candy store. I look for him, but instead of him i see a co-worker of mine. It appears his shift has ended and now it's her shift. I'm a little dissapointed, but aware of the fact that they are working in shifts so he will be back later. In the candy store a patient is lying in a bed.

Still feeling a little surprised that he showed up, interested in the things i am doing...

What i find funny is that in the 'finally inside that house'-dream the man was keeping his distance...this man was a stranger to me in real life...and that in this dream a man enters and keeps no distance at all (this man is known to me; had a few good/nice talks with him in real life) It seems to be one of the first dreams in which this guy is this active towards me; in other dreams it had been me who wanted to go to see/speak him but never had the courage to do so. In the other dreams he also never seemed to be aware of me; most of the time he was reading a book/paper.

Greetings,
Mask

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 36 netherlands

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

Mask,
Look at the man as an animus aspect and you may discover his true identity. He is you, your masculine aspects. The redecorating is an inner thing. It is a part of that inner search you are now currently and consciously undertaking. Changing clothes is a change in attitudes, perhaps even your whole life. Deciding which path to take is a standard event in the hero/heroine adventure/journey. Out with the old self and in with the new Self.

There may be waking experiences that would fit with the dream but I do believe the primary focus is on the inner search. Once you begin, and consciously determine to take the hero journey your dreams will reflect this aspect as much if not more than the waking experiences in life. The older you get the more symbolic the imagery will be of that inner self.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 59 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Thanks for your reply, Jerry!

I know it's about the inner search. But what i find interesting is, after having met this guy in real life, my (mostly) inner life turned upside down totally. I know this had to happen/ even wanted it to happen and inside i still thank guy for having said what he'd said.
I can find it strange sometimes; it seems like the more you think you almost have recovered, the more i don't know who i am anymore, which makes me confused. To me there's no way back, but sometimes i wish it could all feel a little easier. But these first four days of the year seemed to have taken me into a positive direction.

The Animus working in shifts in a candystore. 'In shifts' to me feels like it shows that there are moments in which the animus is already 'in action' or slightly visible, but to dissapear and make room for the emotional again (co-worker). But the co-worker and man changing shifts could maybe also be about balance.
Candy is sweet. Food is mostly spiritual/mental food. I was pretty surprised he was working in a candy store. Maybe this being surprised about this shows i'm thinking in the wrong way about what the animus stands for or what the animus does.
For a long time the integration of the male to meant that i needed to learn to organize, plan...all about responsible stuff. But this man working in a candy store to me now seems to show that i maybe should not be so hard on myself...to maybe search for 'the candy' in life. To go after the things i really like.

Greetings,
Mask

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 36 netherlands

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

Mask,
We must keep in focus your age. You are at that stage when looking back becomes a primary focus yet looking forward is very much still a process in progress. Perhaps the dream is addressing the relationship with this guy in the 'candy store'. Looking to what the candy store may represent may be important. As a child it would be an enormous thing. But as an adult it would be a luxury, not something necessarily conducive to good health {mental}. Because 'he' is a focus throughout the dream 'he' may be the primary focus. Of course it would be the relationship that is central to your psyche. Look at the dream with the 'relationship' with 'him' and see where that leads. It could be more about the outer search, the ego and the relationship in particular {as would be the case of a younger person before mid-life sets in}. Age is always important when looking at dreams.

A particular response in your last post caught my attention and may be important to be understand.

"after having met this guy in real life, my (mostly) inner life turned upside down totally".

How much attention have you put toward this relationship and what is its status? Is there a relationship in the offing or is it he has touched on an inner aspect {resembles some part of you} that has turned your inner life upside down? Since the term 'he' is a constant in the dream the 'he' would be important to understand {of course}. Is it more an outer thing or is it addressing an inner aspect that you associate with this 'he' in the dream?

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 59 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Hi Jerry,

i think it has to do with the inner search more than with the outer. And i think it has been the things we have been talking about that have touched on an inner aspect. (i think)
What was strange then: even before meeting him i was having dreams that seemed to say i was going to meet him (or at least someone who would mean a lot to me). And around the times we dated i had dreams with him in it, too. I told him i liked him very much, but got a negative answer. This answer for me was the moment at which i collapsed, but on the other hand within a short time i was thankful for his answer, because otherwise i would have been going on like i had been going through till then and i think not much would have changed. But...it's a couple of years later now and i still can't forget him. I've tried to figure out whether my coming and going feelings about him are real feelings or just have to do with wishes. This is what him, working in shifts in a candy store, is referring to. Because when he shows up in my feelings again i feel very good, happy. So i think i should try to find out what candy means to me. Back then, him appearing inmy dreams, i already thought of him as my animus and when i read about the animus it could be i'm projecting my animus onto him. Because...how well do i know this guy really? I think i know him, but maybe it means that i know myself...that i know what animus-qualities i possess. Maybe my feeling attracted to him in fact is my feeling attracted to my animus.
The only thing i know for sure is that having met this guy has pointed me in the direction of my animus.

In the dream the 'room' feels like a store and he's working in a candy store. I think the dream is also asking me to do inner search to find out what qualities i possess that can be sold. (used/showed to the outside world)
In the dream i had no feelings about the candy itself. It was only the feeling of being so surprised that he was working in a candy store. I couldn't have imagened him doing that. The candystore feels like something happy and not too serious, while i thought of him as being a very serious type. (i am a very serious type also, but can have real fun) Him working there in shifts could then be my own 'highs and lows'...my very serious periods and my fun periods. And i start feel the fun when he comes to mind...or is it the other way around and does he come to mind when i'm having fun?
There's a patient lying in the candystore when i visit the store...he's not there, though a woman is. This patient i think is symbolic of some inner thing which still is in the need of caretaking. I feel dissapointed when i find not him but this woman in there. This again, i think, is referring to the not being (fully) integrated animus.
I think it is my pitfall to see to much in the outer world and still hope to find my luck out there, while i somehow also feel that by trying to find my luck inside of me i will be able to see the really lucky things in the outer world...hope my writing still makes sense..

Greetings
Mask

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 36 netherlands

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes