I have had 2 dreams lately about the deaths of some people that are close to me – or were.

In one, my 2 yr old great-niece is standing on the floor between me and her mother. Suddenly, she jumps straight up and grabs the ceiling fan (which isn’t moving), then falls from the fan. She hits the floor with her head, and it cracks in two in a clean slice and looks like a walnut inside. That’s the whole dream. I am not very close to this niece, as she lives in another town, and when I see her she acts very shy. I am still very close to her mother, who grew up around the corner from me.

In the other dream, my sister and my former best friend (for 25 yrs) are showing me through a funeral home. They both know that they are going to be dead the next day, and they are showing me the caskets that they are going to be in and telling me about the funerals, very matter of factly. There is no emotion on either side, though just before I wake up, I briefly notice a feeling of fear. These are both people who, for most of my life, I was very close to, but have not been for the last 3-5 yrs. This might be only about the disintegration of the relationships, but that seems too obvious.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 57, Murfreesboro TN

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Peggy,
Your niece standing between you and her mother may be saying something about your relationship with them. But it may also be metaphor pertaining to some other aspect of your life that may hold similar qualities as the relationship {not close to niece- lived around corner fro her mother}. A possible symbol for niece;

Seeing your niece in your dream may suggest unexpected trials and useless worries of the future.

As nieces go {literally speaking} they can be a trial of effort and worries when you have responsibility for them.

The niece not being close but her mother being the opposite may be saying something about your present life experiences. Something is standing in between these two opposites. Or there may be conflict between two possibilities in your life, something may be standing in your way of progression. Refer to the definition of niece. A fan may represent changes in your life {constantly moving}. The two together may hold clues to what the dream is addressing compared to actual current life experiences.

The floor may be an important symbol, representing foundations on which life is build and lived. The fan may represent challenges in life but since it not is not moving it may suggest some aspect of your life is 'NOT' doing the same {moving}. The walnut may symbolize mental activities being extended by a 'task at hand'. This is something that is keenly on your mind, perhaps having to do with basis foundations you have built your life.

The second dream may be directly at some aspects in your life that is coming to an end {death symbolizes an 'end to things' and not an actual death}. A casket may suggest an end to a relationship. It could also apply to other aspects of life that are to be 'buried'. But the standard motif of any death symbol is the possible new birth or new opportunities. No emotions may symbolize no strong feeling either way towards some aspect of life {Your sister and friend become symbols and not their literal selves}. These things are happening 'matter of factly'. That may be what you need to do with this conflict of the mind. Look at it objectively and not emotionally.

Compare what is occurring in your present life and see if this fits somewhere. The feelings of not moving may say a lot about where you are in your life. The task at hand may be to find thing that will help you discover what will 'get you moving' again. There does seem to be a lot of mental activity involved {cracker walnut/cracked brain}. Thinking too much can be a nut cracking experience.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 59 Murfreesboro, Tn

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Thank you, Jerry.
The first thing that stands out is that you pointed out that my great-niece is standing between me and my niece. I didn't notice that relevance on my own, even though it was so obvious. That is how I feel - like the baby comes between us. Her life has changed so much since she became a mom, so she is a different person. Our relationship can't be the same. Since her child doesn't warm up to me the way her mom did when she was little, I don't have a closeness to her yet. I miss my niece, but I understand her life is progressing as it should.
If this part of the dream is symbolic of things in my life not progressing as they should, I would still say that has to do with work and jobs and my constant internal battle with that. Good point about why the fan is not moving - fans are made to move, but this one is still. The baby grabs the symbol of my inertia - and her birth has kind of done that in my life, as I watch her mother (my niece) accomplish something I didn't get the chance to do. (Become a parent)

With the second dream, I have a strong feeling that some things in my life are about to come to an end - that things as they are would be more painful than the re-adjustment required of any change. So the caskets could represent almost any area of my life. I have even thought alot about my personal death lately, as I never have before. Like it could be soon, although that is not a scary thought to me. Thanks for pointing out that dreams of death point out the birth of new opportunities. I didn't know that. I don't recall having repeated dreams about death since I was in my 20's. I used to have nightmares about mine and other's deaths, but they stopped suddenly and never returned. The main theme of my dreams over the last 20 years has been a loss of control - being in a speeding car that I can't stop until it crashes, or being chased, etc. So this death theme confirms for me that some good changes are on the horizon.

"The task at hand may be to find thing that will help you discover what will 'get you moving' again". Snap. That is definitely the task - there has been a long internal deadness that began waking up around Christmas.

"There does seem to be a lot of mental activity involved" - always, always.

Thanks again for your helpful insight.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 57, Murfreesboro TN

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Peggy,
Sometimes dreams will use language that provide a direct link to a waking life experience, as in the case of your great niece and her 'standing between you and your niece'. But if we look deeper we may even discover this language is also addressing other waking life experiences using metaphor to speak to those 'adventures'. You state as much in your response involving work and jobs. These 'internal' conflicts that are of the greatest importance would be the primary focus of most of your dreams with the niece/great niece addressing less important issues. But since that relationship is causing a conflict it too would be a focus of your dreams, seemingly a primary issue but in fact a precursor to the deeper internal issues. The more distant the relative {grand niece} would be speaking to a 'more distant' issue but one in conflict just the same. The head cracking in two may be language about the two divisive issues.

The second dream uses language that is very common when some aspect of life is coming to an end. Death seldom means an actual death {of a living person}, being a metaphor for that life ending event. The issue of your own death would fit with this symbolic image since that is what we begin to focus on as we age. One of the great conflicts that begins to enter into life's equation at mid-life is the subject of death. When we are younger death is something abstract. When we turn the corner at mid-life it starts to become a reality. Depending on the individual it can become a real internal conflict. For those who understand death is a part of living {which doesn't totally remove the conflict} it is less so. It often depends on a religious point of view, heaven and hell, rebirth/re-incarnation, whatever the belief system. I tend to look to an old mystic Islam proverb {quoted by Joseph Campbell of course} to put death in context;

When the angel of death approaches, it is horrific.
When it reaches you it is bliss.

Of course my belief system is a combination of many spiritual concepts, believing the soul to be a spiritual entity that survives the body after death. But as in all 'concepts' about death, none can be proven until the actual experience is lived {and life ends}. More on Death in a Dream and Jung's concept.

You state that the primary theme of many of your dreams is 'a loss of control' using the metaphor of a speeding car that crashes. Such recurring dreams are the focus of how you view your life. Paying attention to such dreams, and especially how they end can help resolve the deep anxieties of 'being out of control'. Although dreams seldom provide a direct answer to a question or problem, they do provide insights to how you do feel about life experiences, and often provide 'clues' to what a remedy may be. The end of a dream can be important in accessing those possibilities {read How Dreams Are Structured from my page 'A Simple Guide to Dreams}.

"The task at hand may be to find thing that will help you discover what will 'get you moving' again". Snap!!!!

Knowing a little about you and your life experiences {having built you a fence some years ago and our discussions about Jung, Campbell and dreams} I am confident your awareness of the tasks at hand will help you persevere. Awareness is perhaps the most important aspect of the inner search. Focusing on the inner self, away from just what the ego self demands, provides direction to better things in life. Especially in the later years. Setting goals and staying the course, the discipline required, this is the major test of will and strength that does lead to a more balanced and harmonious life. As in the myths the hero/heroine face a task that must be overcome. It is through discipline and strength of mind/character that this is done, slaying the dragons with confidence, knowing there will many more to confront and slay. Campbell stated that life is a series of trials and revelations/realizations. I know your character and I am confident that the heroine within will find that paradise of balance and harmony. Stay the course, believe in Self and those things that matter most will fall into place. From experience I witness this all the time.

Must go. Another dragon awaits. But staying the course, the hero path, there are less and less of them, that is fact.

Jerry

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