Morning Jerry and Kristi,

I hope you are both well. Dreams continue to inform and guide me. Your comments on past dream posts have been really helpful. I am so pleased I've found you site and full of gratitude for your good work.

Blessings to you both.

Ken


Jan. 29, 2010

Another dream ... recalled only vaguely.

I am in a big city - maybe Boston - biking through a nice neighborhood of moderately sized houses, old and well kept. Pleasant. A woman friend of mine is riding the same bike with me. I am pedaling and steering, she is behind on the seat (I think). We notice an urban homestead, out of place in this neighborhood.

It is kind of funky, unlike the other homes in the neighborhood. There is a big garden, some chickens and (maybe) goats on the other side of the garden fence. We agree to stop and explore and possibly meet the folks who tend the garden and farmstead.

They are a young couple who invite us into their house and on a tour of the garden. it is a pleasant experience. I consider including them in one of my photo projects about gardening/farming. The conversation with the couple is friendly. My woman friend and I leave on the bike to return toward home.

I waken feeling pleasure and peaceful.

The 4 or 5 days preceding this dream have been full of ruminations about my son, daughter-in-law and grandson. And I’m reading a book about shadows which has moved me into deeper examination of my own dark and usually unexpressed side. My ruminations where mostly about testifying in an imaginary court regarding custody of my grandson and included a lot of painful & ugly stuff about his parents.

This happens in a larger context of a recent message I sent my son about being unable and unwilling to pull up stakes and move to Oregon to “rescue” him in a very stressful situation regarding ending his marriage and taking his son to a different home. Very messy situation. And possibly the clearest message I’ve given him about how I am available to assist in a number of ways but not to disrupt my life here by moving to Oregon. I have not heard from him since and suspect I am once again on his rejecting father / bad guy list.

The last couple of days have been ok. Lots of sadness as I list and accept (just barely) some of the ambivalence - Shadow/Ego stuff - I did as his father and the dance I’ve done for years of being the nice guy while not saying no or setting limits well with my son.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 & Powell, WY.

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Ken,
If your dream is an indication of how your life is unfolding then I see great things.

The big city is you, your entire psyche {self}. Moderately sized houses {perhaps your ego}, old and well kept {perhaps your appearance}. The female friend, your anima. The masculine self is in the lead.
But there is something out of place.

Funky, that is 60's language. The garden is your garden, those aspects that perhaps need cultivating. These things are on the others side of the fence {perhaps a minor barrier}. The folks you wish to meet are those aspects that will lead to a more productive self.
There may be elements here of how you wish life to be when you were younger {1960s}, and how life should be now that you are in your '60s'.

The younger couple, again perhaps a reference to the past. But also a place within yourself that is capable, and in need of growth {personal growth}. The psyche is ready and willing to let this take place. All you need to do is 'farm' the psyche so personal growth will proceed.

The pleasant feelings you had upon awakening is a part of the dream. Either this is how you are feeling at this particular moment in your life, or/and it is a wish fulfillment dream of how things should be. I sense a bit of both.

After reading the rest of your dream I take it to be a confirmation that you have made the right decision about the relationship with your son. Since our dreams reflect our 'true selves', what we really feel and what is best, your dream, and decision, match. Probably the reason for the pleasant and peaceful feelings when you awoke. The dream does help in problem solving and can either confirm or reject a conscious decision or actions.

As for the 60s. When was your son born? If you look back at that period of time in your life, the aspirations and desires from then, your decision for this time of your life is a fulfillment of what is your true desire. It always somehow ties together, this world of dreams. And always reflects the life as it is and often how it should be.

Jerry

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Thanks Jerry,

My son was born (1975) during a period when his mom (my wife) and I were trying to become back to the land - Mother Earth News - farmers. I'd taken a leave of absence from a small college in the Hudson Valley in NY. It was mostly my interest, so the garden and goats were my passion. It was a good time that lasted two years when we ran out of money and I returned to professional work. The following two years brought great tension, divorce, my son in my soul custody and the end of any back to the land desires.

The dream of a small family farm has remained - although I know at age 67 any effort at this will be mostly a dream (pun intended). Even in all the tension with my son, he and I talk wishfully about a rural, self sufficient "family compound" and small farm activity.

Thanks for your comments. I also see and feel it was a hopeful dream and sooo different than the dreams I first posted here.

Ken

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 & Powell, WY.

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Ken,
Myself being a child of the '60s' yet having a son born in the early 70s, I can see where the influences are related. Although I do see the dream addressing the past I also believe it is addressing the present. Planting a 'new' garden, leading to positive personal growth. Is that where you are, or what you need at this stage of your life?

Jerry

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Hi Jerry,

There is and may always be lots of unpleasant drama in my son's life and I will get some of spill over. My job and interest now is to find a way to support him and his family WHILE growing my garden on my terms. Addressing shadows, setting better limits about my availability to him and celebrating / honoring my spiritual and creative efforts keeps me re-balancing often.

It is hard work and it is ok. My feet are usually firmly (ahem) planted and the soil is rich with opportunity. Any literature on "shadows" you can recommend?

Blessings,

Ken

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Ken,
A short response since I will need to start the day early in slaying the social dragons. My page on the Shadow is a great place to begin. Jung's philosophies are a great tool in self discovery and along with the works of Joseph Campbell there is a wealth of information that can lead to that path toward wholeness. It has been my path for 18+ years and I can recommend to anyone who has the courage and discipline to realize it is within them-self they will find the answers. You no doubt qualify.

Jerry

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namaste.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 & Powell, WY.

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Ken,
Your reply, namaste, I bow to you.
Namaste (Sanskrit: नमस्ते, Hindustani pronunciation: [nʌmʌsˈteː], from external Sandhi between namaḥ and te) is a common spoken greeting or salutation in India. It has multi-religious or else common usage where it may simply mean "I bow to you". The word is derived from Sanskrit namas, to bow, obeisance, reverential salutation, and te, "to you".

I have a favorite salutation also, Tat Tvam Asi or twat twam asi, something I picked up in my studies with Joseph Campbell {not in person of course}.

Tat Tvam Asi (Sanskrit: तत् त्वम् असि or तत्त्वमसि , a Sanskrit sentence, translating variously to "Thou art that," "That thou art," "You are that," or "That you are," is one of the Mahāvākyas (Grand Pronouncements) in Vedantic Hinduism. The meaning of this saying is that the Self - in its original, pure, primordial state - is wholly or partially identifiable or identical with the Ultimate Reality that is the ground and origin of all phenomena. The knowledge that this is so characterises the experience of liberation or salvation that accompanies the Unio Mystica.

Such is the wisdom from the East.

Jerry

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