I hope someone can help me with this one. Its pretty big!

I remember being in a country side, more central USA than my home state Florida. The sun had just set, I was driving down dirt roads with old trailers and farm houses that were worn out and had reached the end of their time. I came to this fence and got out of my car and went through the fence. The area reminded me of an old gas station/mechanics shop. There were stacks of crate, boxes and barrels that you could climb on to reach the roof. There were about 15 people hanging out here and I saw a That 70's Show Ashton Kutcher. This was a smoke out party and I somewhat remember Ashton trying to get me to smoke. I dont think I ever gave an answer but I was suddenly back in my car and it was after noon and I was driving through what looked like an industrial area without many buildings. There were a couple railroad tracks and hardly any grass, mostly dirt and poorly paved, run down roads. I drove up to an two-story tall steel garage/warehouse, not too big but not that small either. I went inside through a tall open garage door. There was a truck (I think a Dodge Ram 1500) with a couple big, burly, dirty men working on it. They were leering at me in a sexually perverted way. I walked passed them and through the building and saw another truck (same kind) with only one of the dirty men working on it. He emanated a sexual perverseness that was kind of scary and a lot disturbing. He tried to make a grab for my arm but I just danced out of reach and passed him. Then I went out a side door and was back at my car. My cat, Kishka was sitting near my car and there were two men and a woman standing near my car. One of the men, that automatically caught my attention, looked like he belonged on the cover of a werewolf romance novel. He was tan-ish with dark hair and light eyes, and he was familiar to me in a deep friendship almost lover sorta way. The other male and female were standing close together and I knew they were friends. I grabbed Kishka to put in the car so she wouldnt run away, except the front passenger window was down and she flew out of it and started running down a path that ran into the forest beside my car. Mr. Romance model and I ran after her and I started seeing spiders and webs and the spiders were slowly getting bigger. I got to a clearing and looked at the top of the trees and there were HUGE spiders and webs. Mr Romance model ignored them and keep going after Kishka. I got extremely hysterical and started running back to the car (I have a fear of any spider bigger than a nickel). The couple at the car tried to calm me down but I felt like the spiders were after me and I had to get away. I walked back into the side door of the building and I was in my apartment and I walked into my living room and there were webs with these furry spiders about the size of a 3 month old kitten. Mr. Romance brought Kishka back but all I could think about was getting away from the spiders. I edged past them and out the front door. Suddenly I was back at that old gas station but there was no one there but I could feel Mr. Romance familiar presence but every time I just about got him in my sight he moved faster than I could see. Than I was awake.

A little info... I don't know about the Mr. Romance, but I have been planning on joining Job Corps and go to train for car mechanics. I don't know if this dream has anything to do with that but there were a couple of things that suggest it might be. Please help me understand! Even the part about the spiders cause they seems to be reoccurring in my dreams. I am not absolutely terrified of spiders but I have more than a health dose of fear where they are concerned.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 22 Bartow, FL

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

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Alexa,
I know Bartow, Fl. I spent several months in Lakeland in 1994. I hope to return to the sunshine state when I retire in a few years.

To your dream. My sense is you are trying to find that 'center' {Central USA} where you can feel most comfortable in your life. You may have recently got past a barrier {fence} in that search but you are still having to give thought about that decision. You had to leave that 'old self' {car}, leave behind old habits and surroundings {old trailers and farm houses-Bartow is a bit of a rural area} in order to get where to want to be. The 'mechanics' shop may be a reference to the Job Corps position but also a reference to the mechanics needed to re energize yourself {old gas station}. The boxes and crates are your past and you still have to give thought to those aspects {roof is the thinking self}. There is a desire to expand your horizons to a new awareness {smoke party - marijuana} but the question remains if you are making the right decisions. You have moved past thinking about 'it' and are 'half way there' {noon} to moving on to a final decision.

But there are barriers that remain. The 'dirty men' are a problem which are either from the past or expectations of the future {could be both}. Have you had such experiences in your past, dirty men, that caused emotional conflicts? But it could be a reference to expectations of the sexual bias/treatment you may confront in a move. The 'perverted way' these men in your dream are looking at you suggest this is a real problem.
Let's move on past the detailed dream experiences with the 'dirty men'. You seem to be running from something that does have to do with 'dirty men'. My sense is you have had experiences in your past that were sexual in nature and they have produced a fear that you may get tangled up in a web of further sexual experiences {spider and their web. There is something in your life you can not get away from, perhaps to do with an old 'romance' but something else that was 'dirty'. But the 'romance' may not be a person but the desire for better surroundings and opportunities in your life. Those desires are somewhere other than in Bartow
{that old gas station but there was no one there but I could feel Mr. Romance familiar presence}.

The dream most likely does have to do with your plans with the Job Corps. But the question concerns the 'dirty men'. Are there past experiences that could fit with that? Or are they more of the expectations of sexual bias/treatment if you do join the corps? Is the 'romance' a reference to a real person or the great excitement of the corps possibilities of a new life? There is something 'chasing' you and you may need to resolve those conflicts if you want to find that true 'centered' position in life you seek. Your response may provide insights to what the 'dirty men' reference is about and shine light on the intent of your dream.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

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Jerry,
Thanks for your help. There has been things in my past that would relate to the sexual fear of the 'dirty men'. And I agree that is something that I have tried to run away from and I know that it is possibly hindering me in finding a guy I can trust, which I think might go along with the whole 'Mr. Romance' guy. I agree that the spiders and webs are related to that. I know spiders can represent sex, especial female. But I am truly afraid of spiders so I just wasn't sure if that was being translated from something else. I know recently I have dreamt quite a bit about spiders (all in a scary way).

I also want to say that your insight with the whole Central US thing was very helpful. In a way I feel like I need to get away from here (Bartow) because I consort with a lot of people that are no good for me, but I hang on to their friendships because I don't want them mad at me because I "forgot" about them.

But anyways, thank you so much for your insight.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 22 Bartow, FL

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

Alexa,
I appreciate the response. It clarifies the intent of the dream, the unresolved 'dirty men' experiences from your past that could very well contribute to the 'trust' factor you have with men in the present. I use 'unresolved' because our dreams are a tool in resolving those emotional issues that remain vibrant in our unconscious. As long as emotional experiences remain 'consciously' dormant and unresolved they will 'creep' into our dream life so to awaken the dreamer to their existence with an intent to find resolution to them. It could very well a real factor in trusting men and if so will be a barrier to your trusting men in general, and perhaps involved relationships with men in particular. If left in the unconscious without resolution such past experiences will eventually become more prevalent in your dreams in later life. It is much like a fire, it will burn until it is 'put out'. And their ability to control aspects of the waking life can be very real, such as a mistrust of men. Such a mistrust does not generally happen by chance. There is most always a stimulus for such emotions.

But I know seeking answers to those past emotional experiences are not a priority in a young person's life {and often an older person}. But if you continue to have real problems with relationships with men I do suggest counseling. If you choose the wrong man in an involved relationship it most likely will end in failure. You find out too late the true motives of the guy {he could very well have deeper emotional wounds than you}.

But there is always that possibility you will discover the 'right guy' who will help pull you away from the negative influences of those past experiences. Knowing the reason you have this mistrust of men {or at least one of the primary reasons} may help in choosing such relationships. Sometimes such issues resolve themselves by one means or another. Or you are able to survive and live a prosperous life despite the emotional wounds. I personally believe those chances are less than acceptable, there is need for some resolution or the unconscious influence will continue to have some control in your life {such as a mistrust of men}.

Be cautious. If a guy enters your life who has characteristics of past close relationships that were negative, and you find a trust in this person, well I suggest you look deeper into his psyche to determine his true character. Often such nuances are overlooked and you find yourself in a bad situation that causes more emotional wounds.

example: you get involved with a man who has characteristics of an abusive father/uncle/cousin/friend whom you trusted only to find out he is just like that abusive person. Unconsciously you realize this but consciously you are oblivious to it {as the saying goes when there are issues with a father, you have father issues', if the abusive person was a father and you tend to gravitate to such men}. So be careful when you do get involved in a relationship. But do not let such unconscious stimuli completely lead to a total mistrust of all men. Although a great many of men need to be 'watched', there are those who have good hearts with good intent. You may need to give more time to getting to know the person. Learn to trust your 'genuine' instincts, those intuitive senses, when getting involved. As with a promising experience that seems to good to be true, it most likely is. Your intuitive mind that is clear will recognize it long before an emotional mind does.

In closing I want to applaud your desire to serve in the Job Corps. I see little difference in that service to country to that of joining the military. It will most likely be a very rewarding experience and no doubt a valuable one in later life. Bravo to you and good luck for your future.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Jerry,
Thank you again for your insight. I kinda knew I had those issues, I guess I never realized that my dreams reflected it that much. I actually haven't had many relationships with men (in a boyfriend way) and I know its because I don't want to get hurt by them. But I want so much to find that someone that will be there for me and take me for who I am. But at the same time I am afraid to trust even the good guys and I know I have had the chance to be with a good guy, but I just seem to always be attracted to 'players'. But I don't want to get with someone before I can have my life a little more stabilized and organized before I try to settle down into a relationship with someone.

Anyways, thank you so much for your help. And I am truly looking forward to Job Corps and the experiences I will have there. I truly can't wait until I leave.

Alexa

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 22 Bartow, FL

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

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Alexa,
You are focused on the right thing. Keep going in that direction and enjoy your new life. If and when the past experiences of 'perverted men' start to return, and they will some where down the road, take the proper time and actions to address them.
Take your time in looking for the right guy. You have the Job Corps thing to focus on so make that your goal. Things will fall into place as long as you stay focused and not let the emotions control you. And the best of luck. As long as you stay focused on the right things your luck will be good. That is something you have more control over than most would think. A matter of Karma.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes