Hi Jerry,

It´s been a while, now. It sure is hard to find the time to post a dream, although I dream a lot these days. It´s a very busy but beautiful life beeing a single mom with two beautiful daughters. Much has been going on lately, but I feel like I´ve never been stronger, and never happier. Still there are some things that are not so easy to deal with. And now this morning I had a dream that I think has a message regarding to som of this.

I´m in my livingroom and the grils father is here on a visit. I come out of the shower and discovers taht he has been making a mess of things. He has sprinkled water on my lap-top, and when I open the fridge it is totally empty. he is now outside with the girls. I shout his name out the window, trying to get his attention. I want to know where he has hidden the food. When he comes in he is angry at me for beeing angry at him. We have a fight, end up wrestling on the floor, and I hit him several times because I get so frustrated. I say to him: We´ll never meet again here for sure! (I think this part is about the past months when he had to come here to see the girls. It was not a good solution, as we did´n get along very well. Now he has a place of his own where he can have our eldest daughter come visit him)

In the next part of the dream I´m still in the livingroom, but now, only me and my eldest daughter are here. Suddenly I see a huge black spider on the table beside the sofa where she sits. I run to get my camera, I want to take a picture, because I´ve never seen such a big spider (it´s tarantella sized) I hate spiders, they make panic, and this one is so big you can hear it making sound when it´s running. And it´s fast too. I call for my mom (who is in my daguhter´s room) to come and bring something to hit the spider. She comes out carrying an old porcelain mug (which I recognize from my childhood home) I say to her, No that´s to heavy, it´s too fast, you´ll miss it. Then we discover another spider. It is the same size but white, with barely visible brown stripes on the legs. The black spider has hid under the sofa, but we can hear it. The white spider runs out through a hole in the wall, which leads into a room that seems to be a a storage room that does not belong to my flat. We should block that hole with something, I say. But I know they get in even through the tinyest crakc. Then I wake up.

Sorry ´bout the spelling mistakes, this was written on a hurry, as the baby is impatient..

Inanna

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 31 Norway

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Inanna,

Great to hear from you. Seems things have improved since you last made a post. But that is not a surprise for me. Like the unconventional and assertive 'Pippi' I have felt all along you possessed those special qualities that help you to persevere. With two beautiful daughters to care for your great strengths have overcome all adversities. Let me provide my thoughts to this recent dream later this weekend, most likely Sunday morning. I am currently in the busiest time of the year with my work {contractor} and I have to leave early and have little time to let my intuitive senses awaken. My part time job becomes a full time requirement. I want to provide you with my best insights and although I am able to provide a good sense of most dreams I want to be sure I do my very best for you.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

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Inanna,
In our last correspondence there were strong negatives in your life. Things seem to have improved greatly and I have no doubt it is because of your strengths as a person. Few things are a product of luck, they are influenced by what we do about them. You have moved from a position of being in a most negative situation to having improved your position in life and having a genuine positive outlook. You did it and not someone else or the fortune of good luck alone. We make our own luck, good and bad. The key words are 'making it on our own'.

Your dream.
You have 'cleaned' things up the 'emotional mess' in your life {showerfather of your daughters[ but other than that the relationship is empty. The attachment is only with the girls {outside with the girls}. But you are still seeking nourishment from the relationship {where is the food?}. As with the real waking life experiences with him, you get angry, he gets angry, and anger becomes the focus of the relationship. You are unconsciously 'wrestling' with the whole situation as is. You have accepted the fact you will never 'meet' again in the old relationship that ended up in a bad way. You are moving on with your life {his moving out}.

Spiders can have a lot of different possibilities as a symbolic reference. There may be more than one symbolic meaning of these spiders in your dream.
In your dream it has to do with your eldest daughter. This may suggest 'you are feeling like an outsider in some situation', concerning the relationship between your ex and your eldest daughter. There are probably feelings of resolution to part of the problems with the relationship with your ex {I will refer to him as your ex not knowing his true position}, something you need to take notice of camera}. There may be negative feelings about his seeing your eldest daughter at his place. This may be 'intuitive' spiders can represent the powers of the feminine also} feelings about the whole situation involving him and her.
possible meaning of the spider is its 'mothering protective nature' calling for your mom who is 'in your daughter's room'}. You are concerned, wanting to 'kill' any possibility of his corrupting your daughter in some way, yet mindful of the progress that seems to be taking place in your life {feeling perhaps it is 'too heavy' of a response, and 'too soon'}.

The other spider may be related to your own childhood experiences {childhood home} that were hidden for so long {hidden under the sofa}. You can still remember those experiences {we can hear it}, they are coming through the barriers you had once created {hole in the wall}. You have 'stored' these past experiences and they are a reference for future experiences. You want to block such ideas from your conscious thinking {block the hole} but they still come through the cracks.

The last part of your dream if not the primary intent of it may be the concern you have trusting your 'ex' with your eldest daughter at his place. Not that there are concerns about 'physical' possibilities of abuse {are there any?] but the psychological possibilities. You know his demeanor and perhaps you feel those influences may rub off on her.

I think of spiders in a positive way because they are strong symbolic references to the feminine power. The greatest of those is perhaps the 'intuitive' instincts. If you 'truly and honestly' intuitively feel something is wrong believe in it. I strongly believe such feelings are 'NEVER' wrong {even though I also strongly believe in 'never' saying never}. By 'truly and honestly' I mean your emotional state of mind isn't controlling your thought processes. But either way I believe you should act on intuitive impressions as if they are real, emotional or not. The dream is reflecting your concerns and although there is a grey area in its possible meaning, it lends itself to being very cautious. What to do about it is another subject to be addressed but taking note of your daughter's attitude after she returns from a visit with him may provide clues.

Note: Often I can look to my own experiences in life as a resource to other people's experiences {such experiences being many in the emotional arena and perhaps a source to my connecting to other people's experiences as they are addressed in their dreams}. In my last marriage my step daughter was being manipulated by her dad so to cause problems between me and my wife {font color="#c996666">he still had strong feelings for her}. Psychologically he was using his daughter as a wedge. This could be your experience, an intuitive sense of possible manipulation. That would take you back to your childhood and the manipulation you suffered. That was a feature in your dream, your own experiences being a resource for looking ahead to the future of your daughter.

Does this fit with where you are at the moment? I am greatly relieved things have improved in your life but as always life goes on and there are will always be problems to be solved. Your strength is your strong suit and you will persevere. Believe in that, and the great distance you have come in such a short time since our last conversation. Often it may seem it requires 'super human' strenth to overcome all the emotional issues coming your way. But you have a great example to fall back on, the very positive outlook that Pippi possessed in her 'many adventure' in life.

I look forward to your response.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

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Hi Jerry,

Once again, thank you for putting such amount of effort in your interpretation. I think I know what may be the issue with the spiders. It became very clear to me the day after i had the dream, and now that I read your thoughts I feel even more sure of what they symbolize.
It is not that I don´t trust my ex, he would never hurt our daughter physically, and I know that he is making a real effort to be the best father to her while they´re together.
There was a period of three months just before and after our youngest daughter was born, that he just fled away from everything, and from living here with us, moved straight in with another woman (who he met just two weeks before I found out he was seeing her) This happened two weeks before the baby was born, and the period after this was very chaotic, and naturally I wouldn´t let him have our daughter come visit him when he was living with his new girlfriend.
It took him three months to arrange with a friend from work to share an flat just down the street that is for rent from mars-aug. For him to get to know the baby it is important that he lives nearby. This freind of his does not get along with my ex´s new girlfriend, and (to my relief) she is not there when my daughter is there. When my ex does not have our daughter, he lives with his new woman and her three year old son.
It is a long and complicated story, but bottom line: I have a very bad feeling when it comes to the woman my ex is involved with. I do not trust her at all, she is a mother herself, and despite that she chose to get involved with a man who was two weeks from having a baby, still living with his family.
I know I got really hurt because they didn´t hesitate to demonstrate their new love when I was alone most of the time with a newborn baby, and a 4 year old who couldn´t visit her father. He didn´t show much interest in his children at that time. It seems now that he is trying to make up for this by being super-dad when he has the eldest one. I know it is mainly him who is to blame for the mess that we had to go through, but I know that he at least takes good care of our daughter. And he is like a boy in many ways, inexperienced and immature. But this woman, his new girlfriend...maybe it is a "mother-to-mother" -issue: I cant wrap my head around how she could do that. It is really something I would never do. I just can´t help myself thinking she has a serious lack of empathy, and must be very manipulating. There are other things pinting in that direction to. I know she is very good with computers and that she used to spy on her ex on facebook... And I´m not alone saying it seems she has got some sort of control over my ex. She is very dominant. To my relief, she is not around all the time when he has our daugther, but in time, if they stay together, she will be. And that is a thought that almost makes me panic.. I have a strong feeling that she is obsessed by her own shadow, (after doing some reading on that topic) and I can tell she has a very negative effect on my ex too. He just shuts down, somehow. This was even worse around the time the baby was born.
I know this may seem like I want him back, but that is NOT the case. I really don´t. I see something new and good coming to me in the future.
But I want my ex to find a good woman too, who I can trust is going to be be good to our girls.
But of course, the problem is: Am I making this up, because they hurt me so much, or am I right.. Is she no good? It is the exact same feeling I get when I think of her, as with the spiders in my dream. I´m crossing my fingers that my ex will wake up and leave her, but he seems caught in a net, somehow. Part of the net is proving to me and the world that she was worth leaving his family for.. Even now I have that creepy feeling that she might somehow have access to see what I´m doing on my computer. I don´t know how good a hacker she she is.

But I am very happy in all other ways, my life is filled with love and light. I just have this fear for the future to deal with, but now that I have learned what good can come out of the seemingly catastrophic, I have faith that this to will pass..

Inanna

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 31 Norway

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

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Inanna,
Oh, what a web we weave! Although you trust your ex you have problems with your daughter being with him when his 'new love' is there. The central theme of the dream was focused on your ex and your daughter with no direct mention of the 'other woman'. But the 'huge black spider' is most likely her, that thing you are afraid of {her and spiders}. So it all does fit together.

As for her hacking into your computer. A possibility but either she would have to be a real 'nerd' with computers or hire someone to do it for her, either of which would be breaking the law. The senses you may have of 'her' breaking into your computer may be the fear of her 'breaking into your life' and having a negative influence on your daughter. Unless you can find evidence of computer hacking I would look to the later as the sense you feel. Remember, it is by being objective that you discover truths and not by letting the emotions control you. You overcame the 'strong' emotions when your ex went to another woman so you have that ability so continue use that great asset.

As for the condition of your life at the present time. You have come a long way and with all that has come at you, well it does take a strong will to combat the emotions you have had to deal with. Stay strong and focused on raising your children. Perhaps it would be a good thing to introduce them to Pippi Longstocking {if you yet to do so}. That is something the three of you can share and it can be a great tool for them to learn about strength and perseverance. Just as it has helped you.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

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Hi again,

I sure hope you are right, and you most likely are. Of course the fear of her breaking into my life may lead me to the fear of her hacking my computer. It is really almost the same thing. I spend much of my time in the evenings, chatting with friends now, since I can´t get out much. So the computer represents my life in many ways. It is my private sphere. The idea of her being an influence on my daughter haunts me, but in some way I keep those thoughts at a distance.. Maybe I repress them and they surface from another angle? The idea of her sneaking in and me not being able to catch her.
Even though I have these frightening thoughts every once in a while, I feel very safe, and the way things are moving forward makes me feel like I´m on the right path, and that I´m being "looked after".
So many things in my life tells me that everything that happened was clearig the way for good things to come. And now the challenge is to make the best out of the situation for the girls.

My eldest daughter has been a fan of Pippi since she was just one year old.. watching the films, not understanding a word, but still totally captivated! And she still loves watching Pippi. I´ll of course introduce the little one to her too when she´s a bit older!

Thank you for your thoughts

Inanna

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 31 Norway

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

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Inanna,
Those deepest fears are what are often the focus of our dreams. And your 'life being the time with your computer' is most likely the stimulus of the fear of her hacking into your computer, and thus your life. The good news is you have moved forward.

Pippi has become a family event. And a wonderful tool for the psyche. Just as with mythology the youngest psyche can be 'caught' by such tales as with Pippi because they strike an inner cord. To be able to see it on a screen, that is even better. Raising your children with those wonderful stories from your childhood can only be a positive in their lives. The experiences from your childhood can be a tool for raising your children and to have a such a wonderful guide in doing that, well that is special.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

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