This dream takes place in the livingroom in the house where I grew up, but in the dream I live there as a grown up, and some of the furniture is the same as in my mowin livingroom. I am putting my daughter to sleep in a tent on the floor. I can only see her legs in the opening if the tent, and she is very reluctant to fall asleep, she cries and crawls around in there.

I suddenly get a strong feeling that this is taking too long and I start to hit a broom (not the which-type of broom, but an ordinary cleaning the house-type) against a plastic baby bath tub that is placed on the floor in front of the tent. It makes a loud hollow rytmic sound, and as the sound increases I start using my voice, chanting: AiAi AAAA, AiAi AAAA, over and over agian.

As I do this the surroundings are affected by the sound, it is like the reality in the dream is distorted, the visual film starts vibrating with the sound. It is very intense, and I feel a rush of enourmous power coming out from me. In the bathtub i can see my yougest daughter, so now there are two of her, one in the tent and one in the tub. My eldest dauhter is sitting on the sofa and she looks at me saying: I think this is pretty scary!" but although I´m a bit afarid too, I on some level know that this is a dream and that i´m not really hurting her by doing this, so I continue to raise my voice and let the crazy feeling take me over, I want to see where this is going.
I get the feeling that I am some kind of shaman, and I do feel quite "insane" cahnting and hitting the tub with the broom. Both my daughters are crying now, but I still go on.
I turn around, stop the hitting, but the force of my voice is doing the work, everything vibrates and when I look outside I see enormous drops of rain start to splash into the river outside the house. I know that it is me who is causing it. I get a feeling that I should use this power, and t I get the idea that I must try to send this vibration in the direction where my ex i living with his new girlfriend.
I turn in the direction where I know they live and point the broom at a mountain I can see through the window (this mountain and the river are details from where I grew up) I stare at the mountain and suddenly I see a part of the moutain detaching and taking the shape of a large black bird, maybe a raven. It flies towards the window at great speed. As it comes closer it gets smaller and smaller and finally it flies straight into the glass of the window, falling down on the veranda outside. I see it rise up again going for another try at the window, and crashing into the glass again.

I feel the power decreasing and I´m not sure if i see it rise up once more and the question in my head is: is it dead? I feel some guilt too because actually it was me controlling the bird with my voice and the broom. I´m also convinced in the dream that the bird represents my ex. I wake up before I find out if it is dead or alive.

I think some relevant information is that it has been a very difficult issue for me if he should or should not be involved in my youngest daughters life. I feel that he has not done anything to try to get involved, and that it has been me trying to get him to get to know her, despite the fact that a part of me does not think he deserves it, or even wants it for real.
We have now agreed that he will be coming here to see her two times a week, and I will be out of the house for a couple of hours so he can see the both girls alone. The youngest is now soon to be 9 months old.

I do not want him back in my life, so it is not a very pleasant thought for me to have him over, but for the girls sake it would be good if they both could have a relationship with him, he is after all the father to both of them. I feel the conflict in me as I am writing this, because a part of me is protesting wildly inside me shouting: he is not her father, he has not done ANYTHING for her!

What do you think? The vibration in the dream was very intense and very physical.

I hope you can help me bring some clarity to this one!

Thank you in advance
Inanna

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 31 Norway

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Inanna,
"This dream takes place in the living room in the house where I grew up, but in the dream I live there as a grown up"


This opening sentence probably says a lot about the dream, and where you may still unconsciously 'live' today. And as we have discussed before there may be fears of your own daughter sharing some of the negative experiences as you did when you were a child. A living room is symbolic of where we spend our lives. The tent may represent a form of inadequate protection, again symbolic of fears about raising your daughter. She is in the same living room with you.

The bathtub may represent a need or desire for renewal or escape from the vibrations of emotions {sounds that are very strong}.

The chanting, the sound of AiAi AAAA, AiAi AAAA, you being the shaman may suggest that inner healing is at work or needs to be. Those unconscious forces are in need, if not in the process, of trying to get through {raven flying into the glass}. Your own past experiences as a child most likely have a lot of influence in how you wish to raise your daughters and the fears of them being mistreated {real or not} by your ex is probably a focus of the dream. The vibrations may be from those experiences. They are something a shaman would consider forcefully in the healing process {shamans are healers}.

The issues with your ex being involved with your daughter is most likely prompting such a dream. Taking an objective look at how he treats her may be a good way to gauge how to proceed. And gauging your daughter's reactions when around him. But the vibrations may be intuitive and if so they should be listened to. What do you feel intuitively of how the relationship is going between your ex and your daughter? Being a 'shaman' suggest you would possess 'magical' powers. Such magic in real life could be an intuitive possession. What are your feelings intuitively?

Jerry