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inner and outer

In the dream, I was inside an institutional-type building, like an old building at a college. I was on maybe the third floor, in a rather featureless hallway (light yellow walls), having come out from someplace before I started remembering the dream. It was evening and the place was nearly deserted, except for a few very young (female) students, and an older woman who was my teacher or mentor. The older woman was small and intense with dark hair pulled back in a bun. She did not speak much but did not need to because just her presence and nonverbal communication were so powerful. I felt the glow of her approval and, when I saw the young girls leaving, I thought I might have the chance to be with my mentor and gain some wisdom and insight that I craved. But then I felt shy and awkward and maybe it wasn't the time yet and so I took my toothbrushing and washing things from a locker and started down a long hallway to a lower floor where there were presumably some dormitories. But then I went down another floor to the exit of the building and found some men there building a complicated structure across the walkway ramp leading out of the building. It was made of metal posts and gratings, like a fish weir, kind of a maze at about knee-height. There was an older man working on it, a foreman type, and he was trouble-shooting out loud, talking to a couple younger guys standing outside of it. They ignored me totally, and I picked my way through to go on out to the street.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 54 - Alaska

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

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Re: inner and outer

Jamie,
I have provided a rather detailed interpretation of your dream. It may take some time to digest it all but hopefully we will learn something that will help you in understanding not only the dream but you and your life.

Let's do some in-depth investigation of the symbols within your dream. Hopefully to provide a good interpretation of your dream. And also provide some of my philosophies on dreams. Your dream, and at your age, should follow certain patterns which will be symbolic representations of the images and actions that are reflective of your life and your true self {instead of 'just' the perceived image/impressions you have of yourself, the ego self}. We all wear a mask to cover up that true self. The dream reveals what is underneath.

At first glance the dream symbols seem to fit with many of those aspects Jung tells us to look for in dreams. If we can put the pieces of the puzzle together in a manner that helps you recognize something about yourself/life, in particular your emotional self, interpreting the symbols as metaphors, then perhaps it will help you can go further in understanding why this is something you need to give attention to {it is a function of the dream to bring this to your attention}. Dreams are therapeutic in they try to help resolve emotional conflicts and conflicting energies so to promote a more harmonious emotional and personal life. I often compare the dream to the immune system that protects the physical body. The dream being from the 'metaphysical' psyche, also a 'natural' aspect but a mystery because we do not fully know/understand it, is protection for the psychological/mental self.

Observations on age
At 54 you have accumulated enough life experiences for me to feel/think most of the images in the dream are primarily symbolic and metaphor of aspects of you, of who you really are. Those experiences range from birth {if not in the womb} to your current age.

For anyone who is not within the range of mid-life years {I give a longer range to the mid-life span than many, between 36-60}, I would have to be more cautious since there is not that long range of experience in life. Not a lot of accumulated 'baggage' to sort through. Plus a younger person is still 'moving' forward in life whereas an older person is looking back.
Images can have more direct associations to the current ''emotional' waking life experiences, and at the same time address the deeper aspects that I would look for if in the mid-life years.

The Dream
The institutional building may be saying something about your 'inner' building or complex of buildings. The construction of those buildings, the foundation your life is built on, are a prime focus of the dream. And perhaps because there is not that conscious awareness of this part of yourself, it may be something new to the 'old' self, a new learning {college} experience from your unconscious. The third floor {see the number 3 in MDS dream dictionary} may be saying something about your life not being 'complete', a rather 'featureless' association to some aspect of your life.
Coming from somewhere before 'you started remembering the dream' may be language saying you are 'now remembering, because of the dream, something about your past. Such terminology as a sensory feeling is something I believe often reinforces actions within the dream. Dreams are almost always about the past. The building has a past, as does the inner building and its 'construction'.

It is evening may reflect your position in life, the evening of life. This place 'is deserted' except for young female students and a mentor/teacher. These are metaphors for yourself. The young females may be experiences when you were a young female and/or just now confronting/learning about past emotional experiences. The 'deserted' parts may reflect associations to these past experiences, perhaps emotions that leave you feeling 'deserted' or not being whole. That would match the symbolism of the number 3 in the dream.

Two Aspects of One Symbol
The older woman could be the older you as well as the wisdom self. This particular wisdom self is 'small' yet intense. The black hair would be 'unconscious thoughts'. The position of power is an unconscious position and the power it holds is not verbal consciously. There may be a lack of expression of this aspect of your life, something not yet consciously known or yet to be confronted/resolved. There may be elements of repression or wishing not to think about the experiences.

The older woman as mentor may also be addressing a real relationship in your life. As a young girl who would that person {if any}? If such a person, what was that relationship about? Were you left craving for more from it? She may have been a powerful influence in your life.

Personality
Shy and awkward. Does that fit your personality? Or perhaps it fit you when you were younger but now have grown out of. As a child to mid-teens I was introverted but grew to be my true extroverted self later in life. 'it wasn't the time yet' may be saying something about such experiences in a time frame. And then again it may be something you are now discovering, the unconscious contents of an emotional conflict being addressed in your dream and you in need of resolving the issues. My introverted early life was from not having a prosperous childhood financially as well as emotionally.

Life tends to help overcome the negative aspects, at least on the surface. Underneath they can still exist, the 'foundations from which they originated, a source of the conflict. Consciously they are 'covered up', repressed or not recognized as something that had/has either partial if not full control of the adult life.
Dreams often reveal personality traits. If not current traits those I mentioned above. Dreams often reveal aspects about the dreamer can be determined by someone other than the dreamer. As a direct link to the unconscious our dreams are a great tool to investigate that true self. Dreams reflect the true condition of the dreamer's life. They are objective whereas the ego waking self if primarily subjective. An important thing to learn is to be objective and not too overly emotional about how we deal with life experiences.

Going Deeper
Something in the unconscious is in the locker and needs cleaning. That may involve removing the protection that keeps it locked in. Putting up a shield for protection could be repressed contents. Hallways are often symbolic of connections between the unconscious and the conscious. Lower floors are the deeper aspects. The dormitory could be that unconscious self, the place of 'sleep'. Here is where the truths about your life reside, all aspects.

You are going even deeper in your 'inner building'. The exit may be the exit of unconscious contents. With many references to exiting buildings, removing protection, going deeper may suggest something that is repressed or you do not want to confront. The deeper they are stored the more likely they fit one of the above probabilities.

In these lower regions we find masculine aspects becoming a part of the dream action. My sense they are addressing aspects of your masculine self that are being utilized or may need utilization. They are 'constructing' a complicated structure that leads out of the building. The building is your inner building. It needs strong support and construction {metal posts and wire}. Being knee high may be a progress signification and/or the level of support you will need emotionally {what was repressed is now coming out requiring great strength to confront and resolve}. Tat is what will help you control the emotional aspects. But you have yet to utilize these masculine aspects, except the 'trouble shooting' that is taking place in your dreams/unconscious. You are ignoring, repressing these abilities.

Summary
There does seem to be a good possibility there are repressed aspects to this dream. Or experiences in your past that you do not want to think about or confront. It may involve mentors and younger females {which would be you, symbolically in the deeper sense}. And there seems to be a desire to keep these issues beneath the conscious surface. Do you have such repressed emotional issues? Is there an actual person who would fit the mentor role? At 54 you could be at a crossroads in the examination of your life and are now beginning there are emotional issues that are deeper than thought or realized. But there does seem to be deeper issues that need your attention. The answer to these questions should go a long way in understanding if there are repressed/ignore emotional issues/experiences and if so what they are. Those are things only you can know and verify.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

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Re: inner and outer

Wow, that is quite an analysis and there is so much food for thought and reflection there that I will be working through it for a long time to come.

I purposely did not mention any of my outward life circumstances that I think relate to this dream and other dreams that I have had lately because I wanted to find out just what the various elements themselves might symbolize in some more universal way. But I also hear what you're saying about the personal nature of the symbolism and how it can represent parts of my inner being now and even in the past.

It is interesting that you interpret this dream as covering a good share of my entire life-span until now. I truly am at a crossroads in my life right now. My second marriage ended suddenly, unexpectedly, and without explanation last summer. There have been other changes in my family due to my father's death almost two years ago and my kids moving farther into their adult journeys. There is a major career-path decision facing me right now, with long-term consequences, and most likely a move to a new city (I've lived in the one I'm in now for the most part of the last 35 years). Throughout my adult life, the career has been a struggle for me, to find what I really wanted and admired and to make it what I want it to be.

All this being said, no doubt there are various inner, emotional issues that are trying to be addressed. I have had several dreams that seemed quite significant in various ways over the last months.

There does seem to be a good possibility there are repressed aspects to this dream. Or experiences in your past that you do not want to think about or confront. It may involve mentors and younger females {which would be you, symbolically in the deeper sense}.


As to my younger self/selves, perhaps it is that there were issues at that time in my life which I did not resolve, or tasks especially psychological ones, that I avoided or did not complete. I'm almost positive of this. So now at age 54 I'm trying to play catch-up. I had one bad marriage and tried to fix it with a second. That didn't work. I could not get settled on a career so now I'm having a career crisis when lots of my buddies are thinking of retirement. The image of the mentor in the dream was a real person, who did indeed provide me with some wisdom and guidance at one time in my life but she could only play a small role in my life because she was in a discipline that I could not enter (professional dance). Nevertheless, she was able to express truths - both practical and philosophical - in a way that very few other people I've encountered could do. There was a very big element of self-discipline -- which I was still trying to figure out at the time.

At 54 you could be at a crossroads in the examination of your life and are now beginning there are emotional issues that are deeper than thought or realized. But there does seem to be deeper issues that need your attention. The answer to these questions should go a long way in understanding if there are repressed/ignore emotional issues/experiences and if so what they are. Those are things only you can know and verify.

I will read over and think about some of the other inner meanings that you discussed too, such as who or what part of me the woman mentor might represent or how my younger self relates to where I'm at now or what to do about the masculine elements. And yes, I was a shy and awkward kid, and a shy and awkward young adult. Though I don't feel particularly shy anymore, I still have plenty of awkward feelings, sometimes I feel like I just don't fit very well in my life, in all kinds of ways. Thinking about dreams and their symbolic meanings is a good way to try and make life fit better for me. Finding and/or learning to understand a metaphor for whatever is within me during a painful or awkward time is like finding hidden treasure. (I found some in the outer world too: deer on three occasions and mountain goats in the forest on another)

I have a debt of gratitude to you for the great and really interesting work you do here. Thank you.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 54 - Alaska

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? no

Re: inner and outer

Jamie,
I do appreciate your timely response. Every dream is a learning experience and yours was one that seemed to have several 'discernible' symbols and themes. Your 'quoted' responses fit with what I thought were viable waking experiences. Jungian psyche has provided the tools needed to understand the dream and your dream, my interpretation, and your response do verify there is true merit to Jung's approach.

Addressing the dream in reference to my interpretation and your response.

'There does seem to be a good possibility there are repressed aspects to this dream. Or experiences in your past that you do not want to think about or confront. It may involve mentors and younger females {which would be you, symbolically in the deeper sense}.'

There were many symbols that pointed to repressed or unrealized aspects in your dream. This is seldom a conscious attitude but unconsciously these experiences and their influences have been pushed aside. Most often it is because of the emotional pain they cause. This is standard stuff for most everyone and influences so many aspects later in life.

Your response does seem to confirm this

"As to my younger self/selves, perhaps it is that there were issues at that time in my life which I did not resolve, or tasks especially psychological ones, that I avoided or did not complete. I'm almost positive of this."

It would be those unresolved issues the dream is addressing with the intent to get you to focus on those early life experiences. Who you are, who we all are as adults, have their foundations in childhood. Those early life experiences/influences are 'fixed' in the psyche and remain there throughout life. They 'help' form who we become, how we act, our personalities {see my post New Study-Our personalities may be set as early as 1st grade}. As long as those issues remain unresolved they will have an unconscious influence on your life.

Personal Note: I had such influences from early life {especially childhood} that were controlling and framed much of who I was in my twenties. And I have had many experiences with other people, from the Dream Forum as well as in real life, were it was discernible to see where such influences fit. The early life experiences may not necessarily 'make' a person do any one thing but they do greatly influence the actions. I began to 'grow' out of these influences in my early 30s but it was not until the age of 42 {when I come across Joseph Campbell and began my inward journey and detailed self analysis} that I began to understand the underlying, unconscious influences and was able to resolve/control them. The experiences can never be removed from the psyche, they are ingrained, but the influences can, or at least controlled.

Back to the dream and your response

"So now at age 54 I'm trying to play catch-up."
The mid-life stage is all about 'catching up'. And trying to make sense of it all. Our dreams are a conduit for 'catching up'. You may not remember, may not want to, those past experiences/influences but they remained stored within the unconscious. The dream is a 'direct" link to the unconscious.

"I had one bad marriage and tried to fix it with a second. That didn't work. I could not get settled on a career"
Failed relationships often are influenced by one or two things. Unconscious experiences that have influence over your direct behavior {you are at fault} or influences that cause you to make wrong choices {the fault is primarily the other person but the choices you make lead you to choose such a person}. The same can be said of careers.

PN: I have seen many friends make wrong decisions in their choice of partners that were wrong from the beginning. They tended to make these wrong choices repeatedly. It is only reasonable to assume there was something other than what was visible that 'influenced' such behavior. From my study of Jungian psyche and what he had to offer as answers to 'why', I can see the relationship to those unconscious early life experiences/influences. It all fits together, so much so it is almost empirical.


  • "The image of the mentor in the dream was a real person".

  • she was able to express truths - both practical and philosophical

  • which I was still trying to figure out at the time


I broke this part down to illustrate two points. The first has to do with the imagery of the 'wise woman' in your dream. Understand that this wisdom image will often address the two aspects;
the self wisdom you possess or should possess
the actual person who was the wise woman in your life

The actual person we know was real. The way the dream stated her position is good cause to believe there was such a person.
As for the 'inner' wisdom she represents this statement seems to be addressing the power of that unconscious self:
"She did not speak much but did not need to because just her presence and nonverbal communication were so powerful".
This would be stating that your wisdom self was not speaking consciously and providing the guidance you need in your waking life in making choices and decisions. But her 'powerful' voice is present in teh dream, the unconscious. I take this to mean there is a true wisdom within you that is ready to take its place in your waking life. You need only to make her voice herd in everyday life. Hopefully your visit to the Dream Forum will provide insights to how to do just that.

My second point is within these words, 'which I was still trying to figure out at the time'. Joseph Campbell is famous for his 'follow your bliss' mantra. He states we have two opportunities in life to discover that bliss. Early in life you were introduced to the 'dance' but because of 'the discipline you could not enter'. I take this as saying you were not good at dancing. That could be because of your awkward tendencies. But it was an introduction to the creative aspects, an aspect both Jung and Campbell say is the 'soul's intent. Now, at mid-life, perhaps you are being directed to once again look at the creative aspects. Perhaps in the career you are seeking so late in life. As Campbell also stated about the bliss in life:
“When you follow your bliss... doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else.”
Perhaps you examine those creative possibilities you will find a career that not only provides a career but also let's you 'follow your bliss'. And with that your job is not a job but is a blissful indulgence in life.

What does the dream say about this?
'I thought I might have the chance to be with my mentor and gain some wisdom and insight that I craved. But then I felt shy and awkward'
Because of your shyness and awkwardness you could not gained the 'insights' to that creative self. You have overcome the shyness. The 'dance' is the muse and although you may be awkward at dancing you do possess some skill that not only you would be good at but also is that bliss you seek. You need only discover what it is.

PN: As a teen I had an interest in psychology. I even took several sociology courses when I was in the Army. But because of life's circumstances, and a lack of 'discipline' I never followed up on that interest.
At 42 my second chance came about. Again it was Joseph Campbell and the presentation of his interviews with Bill Moyers in The Power of Myth. After that first encounter, when the one hour program ended, I knew my life was changed. Campbell, a Jungian, led to Carl Jung and the dream. I have been with it ever since.

From my interpretation:
At 54 you could be at a crossroads in the examination of your life and are now beginning there are emotional issues that are deeper than thought or realized. But there does seem to be deeper issues that need your attention. The answer to these questions should go a long way in understanding if there are repressed/ignore emotional issues/experiences and if so what they are. Those are things only you can know and verify.


From your response this all seems to be very true. Of course we do not need to examine the dream to know that the mid-life thing is real. It is a time of searching and re-evaluation. It is the 'deeper' issues that must be examined. It is evident from your response quoted above {I am almost positive of this} that there are issues from your past, deep issues that need to be examined. That is the next step. To help you understand the process, a process I have followed for the past 18 years and one that is 'taking' me to my place of bliss, is Jung's Individuation Process. This is a self examination of the personal life and a discovery of what is in that life that makes up who you are and answers the question why you are that person. It is an involved task to undertake but with 'discipline' you will be amazed at what you discovered. Take a look at this very conversation about your dream and what you have learned. You just happened to find my website {Jung's synchronicity, chance encounter of fate} and that could be a catalyst to true self discovery.
That is the intent of Myths-Dreams-Symbols, to help others discover what I have found. And it is a way to explore and follow my bliss. MDS is my other self, my true self. When you discover your other self, the parts of you that are hidden in the deep unconscious, you too will know your true self. And that will open doors that you never knew were there.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Re: inner and outer

Hello Jerry,

There has been so much to digest in your responses, as well as other comments and essays on this website (just read Ancient Aliens Theory vs Jung's Archetypes, thought about standing on top of the Pyramid of the Sun at Teotihuacan just a few years ago with my soon-to-be second ex-husband, what an amazing experience it was to be there and also my first encounter with the Maya buildings and pyramids). But life rushes along and sometimes the outer world seems to just cannibalize the inner.

Anyway, I've made my career decision now and it does seem that this has been true,

doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else.

I had thought the insights in the dream I described might help me to understand the decision that I had to make. As with most things like this, it did but it raised even more new questions, especially upon reading your responses. One night I prayed before falling asleep for another dream to help enlighten me. Such things cannot be rushed or forced and when I awoke to go to work the next day I felt frustrated and disappointed until I remembered I did in fact have a dream, which seemed rather silly, just before waking up. But after remembering it better, it seemed to reflect exactly my current state of confusion. It went like this.

I am a volunteer ski patroller at our local ski area (in real life). In the dream, I was standing at the loading area of the new "baby" chairlift (pretty real, in the dream). A couple of the younger guys on the pro patrol, in their red jackets, were standing there chattering away, and I heard them laughing and joking about a crash and a bumble I had made recently. But in their talk and laughter, I could also tell that they really liked me too and were glad I was there on the patrol. I turned back to trying to get on the chairlift but was having trouble. First I was standing in the wrong place. The next chair came but swiveled sideways before I could get on it. Four chairs in all went by and I could not get on. The lift operators, nice, low-key guys in dark green jackets, were trying to help, coaching me on how to get on, but I kept missing, then I woke up.

Just a few days later, I felt I had the opportunity, in real life, to "get it right," so to speak. It was on several levels -- from actual skiing to relationships with others to finally making the decision and following through with it about my career.

Also in the period, I remembered another piece of a dream which seemed somehow significant. I was leaving the crowded downtown tourist area of where I live, and crossed a corner leading out to the main drag. In the dream there was a shop there, that, up a half-flight of stairs, was crowded with pianos, and I went in there to look. They were not just regular pianos, but they were studded with lots and lots of glitzy crystal-diamond things, tiaras, and such. I wanted just a regular piano and thought of an identical place that had only one plain piano in it and I wanted that one, not the dressed up ones in this shop.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 54 - Alaska

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? no

Re: inner and outer

Jamie,
Here are some thoughts from your recent dream from the last post.

volunteer ski patroller-providing healing

new 'baby' chairlift-something new that will 'develop' to help' lift' you up, help you with the 'load' in your life

younger guys from pro staff-fresh insights from higher self {pro}

chattering-communication between unconscious and conscious

crash/bumble-conflict or mistake in your life {perhaps looking back at you can laugh at}

trouble getting on chairlift-problem finding ways to 'unload' conflict

wrong place-wrong situation. This may be a test of your resolve {hero journey}

4 is wholeness, not yet there- perhaps this is addressing career choices

low keyed guys may be addressing your personality

dark green jackets-personal growth, going to the deeper aspects, helping hands

coaching/you keep missing -self discipline, something that may be missing

The part about the crowded area would be leaving that part of yourself/your life that crowds you {as you state, the clutter of devouring outer self}

The crossing may be a reference to a 'threshold' {see the monomyth}

Half way up is at the level of the heart {middle of the body}. Listen to the heart?

piano in one aspect would be the muse. It would also represent 'harmony' in your life

'studded with lots and lots of glitzy crystal-diamond things, tiaras, and such. I wanted just a regular piano and thought of an identical place that had only one plain piano in it and I wanted that one, not the dressed up ones in this shop.'

not needing material worth but the simple in life. The one plain piano is identical to who you are, want to be, the true self

where do we find that true self?
'physically' inward/psychological, and identically/ideally the muse, your bliss/listen to the heart

Summary/Food for Thought

It seems as if the dream was in its way addressing your prayer. But we must remember dreams are compensatory and although they can provide insights to the future, they seldom if ever predict/offer future events.

In the aspect of compensation I see the dream pointing to the 'heart'. What is it that fits at the level of the heart. The piano. On one had it would teh balance/harmony you seek in life. But is it pointing yo something more direct? Of course we know what Joseph Campbell says about following the heart. 'Follow your bliss.
But if you do not know your bliss? Then would not that be the thing you should be searching for? If there has been a lack of discipline what would that be?

If your bliss is known then it is only a matter of discipline to achieve it. And at this stage of your life, where do you go or what should you do that fulfills that 'bliss'? If it is a career choice or one of relationships you still need to discipline yourself toward that goal where you obtain/achieve/fulfill your bliss.

What do you think?

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

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Re: inner and outer

Hi Jerry,

This is once again wonderful food for thought. I have read part of and bookmarked the google book on Jungian dream interpretation, I know I'll be returning there soon.


Themes that you observed make them even more clear to me now, including the healing role, music, self-discipline, and how these might relate to career and relationships.

I intended to go to medical school, from about age 16. I was a serious student and always have gotten good grades but instead I followed an unplanned and winding path of adventure for awhile, including some undisciplined behavior, partly acquired -- which with increasing maturity I got rid of fairly quickly -- and partly I believe innate to my nature. This persistent lack of self-discipline you found in my dream stories.

My self-discipline was severely challenged as I tried settle down into the roles of marriage and parenting. My first husband was a partner in the early and undisciplined years of adventure, but once we settled down, he proved to be an inconsistent, often unfair, and unsupportive partner and I struggled, with him and myself.

After many years of frustrated attempts and false starts, I made some success as a fish biologist, coinciding with mostly peaceful and contented years of second marriage. But my short career in that started foundering about the same time that my Dad died unexpectedly and a short time later my second husband left me also unexpectedly. As I'd always kept the dream of medicine in the back of my mind, I began thinking of trying again to make this a reality. However, having made some tentative steps along this path, I was confronted with an opportunity in fisheries too good to pass up. It seemed the ideal job, as it would fulfill my love of adventure, of biology and science, and an element of helping people. It seemed a long shot I would get this job, though, and I felt comfortable knowing that I would have tried my best and could continue with my plans to enter the health care field. But through a drawn-out sequence of events which were juxtaposed in a really strange way upon events in my personal life, particularly my upcoming divorce, I got the job and decided to go for it. What to do with my dreams of medicine at this point?

I believe the dream scenario with ski patrol and chairlift may have expressed in some way my feeling of failure to have once again not followed through in medicine, despite the likelihood my deeper nature was trying to lead me there. Again, a lack of self-discipline and also a lack of confidence seems to be manifesting itself. Being aware of this now, though, I feel I can be more alert to where my true nature is trying to lead me and not bypass or miss those gates that I might find in the future.

I have always loved music but never considered it a career option. Studying jazz piano recently has added a depth and dimension to my mental and emotional life that amazes me and grows stronger as I progress. Perhaps this is in part an intentional practice in order to exercise self-discipline skills.

The scene on the crowded street and the corner across the street were very literal in my dream and your comments suggest to me they were literal in terms of my present psychological reality also. My life here, especially the past 18-some years since my first divorce, has indeed become cluttered and overcrowded in a way that is not truly functional for me; my roles and activities fill my time and connect me to others but do not really make me feel whole. The threshold is real: I will be moving from this town that has been home to me for most of the last 35 years and going into a new and mostly unknown place. I am approaching the "passage beyond the veil of the known into the unknown." I know that "the powers that watch at the boundary are dangerous and to deal with them is risky" yet now in my life I'm eager for that danger and risk, that adventure. I know that I am seeking greater harmony in my life, both personally and professionally, and I agree that the plain piano represents that, represents me and all that I am searching for. I might add that my playing right now is still rudimentary and awkward but that sometimes after long practice with little evidence of progress the elements just come together and voila! there is music.

I don't exactly know what I am searching for, but I have these threads I have been following up to this point, and I know that above all I am searching for a way to harmonize them all into a good and meaningful life. I know that success now will sustain me into my old age, and for this reason, failure is not an option. Therefore, the self-discipline is crucial.

Thank you once again for you clear and sparkling insights, and for the helping and healing work you do with all who interact with you on this site. I might not post again for awhile but will continue to visit here for inspiration and new knowledge.

Jamie

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 55 - Alaska

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Re: inner and outer

Jaime,
Jung had the wisdom in looking for the answers to always 'getting back to the dream'. Let's do that and see if that helps explain what is needed to find what you are looking for, that bliss you seek.

From your original posted dream the language was 'It was evening and the place was nearly deserted'. I look at that statement and think of your present stage of life
at the age of 55 {evening} and the inner condition of your soul {deserted}. The dream statement continues, 'except for a few very young (female) students, and an older woman who was my teacher or mentor'. These unnamed persons are aspect of yourself, you the student and you as the teacher. The question is what is it that needs to be learned? Your youth is in the past. You are in the process of teaching yourself about that past. The mentor{s} or guide are those realizations from that past. THIS IS THE HERO/HEROINE JOURNEY, your own self discovery.

Because the hero/heroine journey is primarily psychological it is the past that holds the answers. It is by searching that past, beginning with your earliest childhood memories and experiences, you discover the 'secrets' of who you are. This is Jung's Individuation Process and it is through this self examination of self that you find 'that thing' you are looking for {Joseph Campbell often referred to this common mythological motif as the one hidden thing}.

This teacher/mentoring part of yourself is growing, evolving, and is to be found within your unconscious past {The older woman was small and intense with dark hair}.
'She did not speak much but did not need to because just her presence and nonverbal communication were so powerful'. This is the inner communication of self, the unconscious wanting to inform the conscious self. This communication is done through dreams {and psychotherapy if so engaged in that exercise}. By looking to your past you discover aspects about these 'young girls' you were unaware of consciously. You gain insights to your present self.

Taking your toothbrush and washing things suggests to me two things. One was about timing {maybe it wasn't the time yet}. You took other paths, the evolving aspects of learning that are required in the pre-hero realizations. You eventually start down that long hallway {connecting unconscious to conscious realization} down to the unconscious aspects. The dormitories are where those earlier stages/aspects of life preside. And one particular 'floor' holds special emotional energy. It involves the masculine. Undeveloped masculine aspects {younger guys} following the instructions of the inner wisdom of a developing masculine {older foreman}. This is an unconscious aspect, undeveloped, wishing to 'shout out loud' to the conscious self. This is something that has been ignored in your waking life. Something we now know as 'DISCIPLINE'.

The second may involve 'career choices' at such a late stage of life. If it is something that leads to your bliss then changes may be positive. But is it about career, status/income, or is it about finding that final 'frontier' that leads to a harmonious life?

But the underlying causes to this lack of discipline are to be found in the foundations of your psyche, those earliest experiences/influences that helped form your personality and self in the present time. I say this only because the void remains and although you have made great discoveries about the discipline there remains those feelings of not knowing what you are searching for. I go back to my own discovery and remember my 'void' and what it was about. It involved my early life experiences and influences primarily having to do with my father. When I began to resolve those issues {in the ensuing years after discovering Campbell and Jung} I not only realized what those unconscious influences were in my life but I began to realize what my bliss was {my dream work and Myths-Dreams-Symbols website}. Being like everyone else, my journey of self discovery is standard fair, with early life experiences/influences being what leads us all to who we are later in life. And often the thing that prevents what it is we are looking for in our bliss. That 'one hidden thing' being a common motif because it is a common condition of the psyche most of us share.

My explanation of the dream is but one aspect. There may be literals experiences involved also {something you alluded to in your latest response}. In particular the masculine influences in the later part of the dream. Put that into context with the young females and older woman and you may begin to remember past experiences related to these dream symbols. But I do believe the central message, one that you have 'heard out loud' and have consciously integrated into your being, is of the discipline you need to continue down one path, the one floor, that will eventually lead you to wholeness and your place of bliss. It is a physical task in your waking life but more importantly a psychological journey you need to examine to determine those influences that 'block' your search {that one hidden thing motif is often behind a locked door}.

As for your bliss. A clue may be, and is most often rooted in the muses. At the age of 55 it may be important to go beyond career and look to that thing your heart and soul wish for {my wish is to retire early, next year in fact, so to be able to put all my efforts to my dream work and web site}. Could it be that early outer life masculine influences, the older foreman in your dream, were so dominant that it has left an undeveloped 'inner masculine self'? Consider the possibilities and see where they lead. It is in the mere thinking about such things that you find so many answers.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

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