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being cheated on

I was alone in a room, I think my bedroom, my husband opens the door but does not come into the room, and says something like "that was so fun", I can see another man by him, and in my husband's hand a sex toy. He implied they just used it together. In my dream I recognize the toy as mine and I tell him thats gross and not ok. Then he said they can just wash it. I tell him I need to speak with him privately and he comes into the room, I start to cry. "What are you doing?!" I say, and he says "what? You didn't have a problem with the midget!" through my tears I yelled "yes I did! I hated it! You are cheating on me!" Don't remember how the conversation ended but next I remember being outside the house and the man my husband had been with is painting a window sill. I confront him, tell him to get the f**k out of my home and our lives. This is the last part of the dream I remember.

A few notes, don't know if they matter or not.
I woke up feeling heartbroken, depressed, angry, and literally sick to my stomach.
In my dream I was in my bedroom, but it was not my real life bedroom.
In real life we live in an apartment, not a house.
I do not own a dildo like in my dream and the thought of this really grosses me out.
The color being painted on my house by the man is the same trim color of the home I grew up in; a blue-ish grey.
I don't know any little people and don't know why one was mentioned in my dream.
I did not recognize the man and cannot remember what he looks like, I think because he made me so mad!
My husband and I are both straight, not bi or gay.

My husband and I have been married for almost two years and are very much in love. We do argue often, mostly because I am no longer on mood stabilizing drugs because we want to start a family and they are not safe to conceive on.

Neither of us has cheated, but when we were dating years ago I did find a facebook message from him to a woman he worked with that was not appropriate. It was just flirtatious, nothing physical ever happened between them. But I did feel as though I had been cheated on. I confronted him and we worked that out and later got married, so I don't think that is still bothering me.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 28 Oregon

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? no

Re: being cheated on

Being in your bedroom alone may represent emotions having to do with your feelings about conceiving which may not be shared by your husband. But you may want to consider not taking your mood meds as a possible reason for the feelings of loneliness.

The fact your husband opens the doors does suggest there are conflicts between the two of you. The other man beside him may represent 'another side of him'. The sex toy would probably relate to your sexual {your toy} experiences with your husband. His using the toy may make you feel as you are more an objective for sex than one of love. The arguments may be a stimulus for some of these emotions, plus the lack of the meds that control your mood swings.

The 'cheating' may involve feelings of guilt on your part {your dreams are about your emotions}. The midget could represent being made to feel 'small', unappreciated. This is definitely something you do not like and can't be washed off so easily.

After reading the rest of the dream my sense is the 'other' man by your husband would be another way of looking at him. Wanting to get 'him' out of the house {the house is you} would be emotions about wanting/needing to get some aspect of the relationship out of your life. Because of the inclusion of the sex toy in the dream it is a good bet it does have to do with sex and conceiving. But because your dreams are about your emotions, and because you do have mood swings that require med, the other man beside your husband may due to the mood swings and lack of meds {the meds were something that controlled these swings and without them you have less control-dependency may be an issue}.

My sense is because of the conflicts over conceiving and your mood swings { the altering of natural moods} your dreams are partly due to the lack of meds but also an emotional conflict over the wish to conceive and conflicts with your husband. The past experience you spoke about involving your husband and the older woman. Consciously you may feel you worked out these issues but unconsciously theer remains a conflict. The other man could be that person who wrote the inapproperiate note, a person that is your husband but wh is different from the person you 'consciously' perceive and 'want' him to be.
A note: Always pay attention to intuitive impulses. They are always right.

But this could be the 'lesser' issue {midget} that the dream is wishing to help resolve.

There may be deeper emotional issues involved since the trim color of the house in your dream made you think of the same color trim on the house you grew up in. These issues may surface in future dreams and could be important. Childhood is where a person's foundations are set and the reason for your mood swings may have begun there {mood can be influenced by past experience which in turn can alter brain chemistry with the meds you take providing balance to that chemistry}.

A lot to think about. Sort through what I have provided and compare it to your waking life and see what fits. How strong are your 'moods' and how much are they responsible for the arguments with your husband. And also give taught to childhood issues. The first of a series of dreams often opens doors to the deeper issues. The arguments with your husband may simply be normal marriage conflicts but the underlying reasons why you need meds to begin with, and a source of your irritability, may have origins somewhere.
The other man could very well relate to 'husbands' but not your husband. Look at the relationship with your father, a husband, and determine if there are unresolved issues there. Again, a lot of possibilities that would require the use of my couch and my 'Freudian'/ NO STRIKE THAT/ my 'Jungian' mind to properly resolve.


Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 61 Murfreesboro, Tn.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

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