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a tree and a love question

Hello everyone... Please tell me smthing about this dream... i think it has a very important message for my life right now..
Here it goes:
I am in a forest. A big forest, old with a lots of trees. It is like a magical forest. There is also a guy who is like a gide who is showing me all of the trees one by one. And every tree represents a person. And then he showed me one which is maybe the oldest tree in the forest and i stood amazed before it. the tree had the shape of an old man who looked like Merlin from the fairy tale. And i want that tree. the Gide was shocked because i made that choice and kept telling me - but it is so old . and i was like - wow it must have like a million years! completely amazed by that fact and absolutly happy, extatic. Someone from behind me is pulling me away and i struggle because i want that tree and no other.
So, now in real life i am in a serious relationship for over 1 year with a man who completely changed my life for the best. And he is older than me, a lot older. And i love him very deeply.
this dream represents that situation - but in what way? Is a tree a good symbol for love? Please tell me what you think of the whole story :)
Thank you

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 28, Belgrade

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Re: a tree and a love question

Veronika,
It is fairly easy to see the dream is addressing your waking life experiences {something that is usual for someone who is younger than the mid-life years,a phase that normally begins at around 35, when dreams tend to focus on 'inner' aspects as well as the outer waking experiences}. But are there underlying reasons to why you chose an older man to have a relationship? Let's examine this old 'tree' and see if it leads to other possibilities.

First, what was the relationship with your father? Could it be one reason you chose an older man is he fills a void from early life, that wise aspect your father should have provided? Why is it you choose this one 'old tree'? Is there real 'magic' involved? Such magic in nature is not really magic at all but merely a fulfillment of the 'natural' desires and needs of the human psyche. The guide in your dream is masculine. Is the guide and the old tree this older man? He is a replacement for the father you never had? This is a relatively an easy question to answer.
Even so, he is filling a void, it doesn't mean it is a wrong choice. It may be he does fulfill such a void and that is what you truly need in your life, at this stage of life. If the answer to the question is a 'yes' then you will need to examine how strong the unconscious desire is in making this choice of an older man.

That may lead to another aspect of your choice, and a question of choices. Are you the type {the dream does suggest a personality that tends to rely on the masculine to obtain and sustain strength in your waking life} that tends to make wise choices or someone who makes wrong choices only later to regret them? If it is the later then I would examine the relationship with the older man in a deeper light. If it is the former his wisdom may support a wiser than usual masculine wisdom you possess {suggesting you possess a wiser masculine aspect than the norm for your age}.

It may be the wisdom aspect of your psyche is what is in play with the dream. Is the relationship filling a void of the 'wise' father figure and if so is it a fit with your true self {someone with a wiser than the norm masculine attitude that compliments who you are and supports not only your needs but his}. If it is merely fulfilling the void of a lost father relationship then you need to examine the relationship and perhaps pay attention to what your friends have to say. This would fit with a personality that tends to make the wrong choices {is this you?}. If the 'old tree' is both the man you are dating and also a wise animus then you are probably the personality type that tends to make wise choices. There should be a fit to one or the other.

Forests are often symbolic of transitions. Trees are symbolic of growth. The dream is probably addressing issues of personal growth and transitions in your waking life. Depending on your personality the phases would be related to what I have mentioned previously. If you possess a wiser than normal 'masculine wisdom' then that would probably be a focus of the dream, and related to the choice of the older man you are in a relationship. If you tend to make wrong choices, choices you tend to regret later on, then the old tree would more likely be a symbol for a need/desire to fill that void from early life. There would be good possibility the relationship with the older man could be another 'wrong choice' based on a need to fulfill what was not provided by your father {an easy question to answer if you examine the relationship with your father}. Look to your personality and determine which you are. Someone who possess a wise masculine that tends to make wise decisions or someone who is the opposite, lacking the masculine qualities needed to make those wise decisions {which could be a product of not having that proper father/daughter relationship in your formative years}. If you answer these two questions honestly then I believe you will be in a good position to see why you have chosen an older man to have a relationship.

There is that possibility the need to fulfill the void lacking from the father relationship would work with the older man, he filling that void. But it would likely be a 'choice' that doesn't turn out to be the fulfillment you seek in life, it being a temporal band aid for something much deeper. Again, the lack of an ability to make the right choices in life coming back to haunt you.

Let me put a personal perspective on the relationship with the older man that is outside the dream commentary. I recently celebrated my 62 second birthday and having been married three times but not have had been in a long term relationship for over 18 years, I look at the possibility of experience as my guide. As well as my true self and what I need and desire at this stage in life {having had the experience of sorting through the life long accumulated 'baggage' and sorted it all out}.
For me, entertaining the possibility of having a relationship with someone 34 years my junior is not likely. The age difference, the stages of life we are both experiencing, the current needs and desires of both, would be factors I would look to. This would reflect who I am, and in the case of the older man in your life, the same. How would I, and he, reconcile these major differences? For me the past experiences in life, the study of Jungian psychology and reconciliation of my own inner world would make such a choice with a younger woman most improbable. The difference would be too great.
Unless this 'imaginary' woman possessed a wisdom well beyond her age, as well as possessed a personality/psyche that required her to seek out an older man {in which I would have to thoroughly examine those aspects and see where they came from and where they may lead}. She would have to be in the same mindset as I thus making my position in most aspects in life the same as hers. I believe in equality and an relationship would be one of sharing those same things we both wish for, things that are similar and would likely work {with the experience of three failed marriages I know what doesn't work}. A 28 year old woman most likely would never be at that same place, or even close to it, than where I am at the age of 62 {although I don't look or act my age because of having engaged in a physical fitness routine for the past 32 years}. Not to say it is an impossibility. For someone like myself who does make physical fitness a lifestyle, someone younger would more likely match that aspect of life {at least in appearance}.

Note: To see what 30 plus years of physical fitness does for someone at the 'advanced' aged of 62 watch my video of playing basketball {on YouTube}. Besides advocating a sound mind and spirit I also tend to 'push' the importance of good physical health. The old adage of 'pay me or pay me later' is evident here. If I can do it anyone can.

This is something you may want to consider beyond your own motivations. What are his motivations? I have friend my age who still dates only much younger women. He has deep psychological problems. Not to say your guy does. But it is something you need to consider. If your personality type is of making bad choices, and his personality is not much better, you can see where that would lead. Disaster. Let's hope everything is positive in both psyches of the masculine old tree and the younger feminine lady engage in her own real life fairy-tale {Merlin}.

What could it be that is would be 'pulling you away' from the old tree? Your friends in your waking life, yes, that is a 'conscious' reality. But are there underlying aspects, unconscious motivators that could also be pulling you away? The dream is the 'wisdom' self, even for those who lack true wisdom in their waking life. Putting the 'pieces of the puzzle' that is the dream is the task at hand. But answering the questions I have proposed should also lead to answers. Being honest with yourself is important. Your future is before you. A person of my age, well my future is something different. Can you reconcile these differences? My heart hopes the answer is yes. My mind, and experience, requires me to look at things logically. At this stage of life the head is now above the heart and looking at what the soul. In my philosophy the soul is of both amour and bliss. My amour is my bliss and it is based more on the creative and spiritual, and less on the yearnings of the heart. But that is me.
The question is 'Who are you'? And who this older man in your life?

Jerry

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Re: a tree and a love question

look, i am highly intelligent. i.ve never done tests to see how much but i am at the top. i just "get it" whatever it is . And i have an enormous life experience - larger than any i know - except this man who i am with. So, i appreciate all the things you wrote about the " electra syndrome " but this is not my case at all. I have examined that possibility in every aspect - through pure logic, religion. psychology. parapsychology, and all other ways there can be for a better understanding of my situation. Particularly because i am pretty good looking and i know i can be with almost any guy i want but... i am so bored with people my age or slightly older. or even much older but nor at my level. this is not an imaginary stupidity - it is a fact and i was always told i was different and gifted. i do have a problem accepting that because i personally believe that everyone has the potential to obtain a higher state of mind and a better quality of life - with greater knowledge comes grater beauty and that we are all the same like equal and that i am no different than the rest of the world blablabla...
With this man - i've have felt such an magnificent sense of faith - like we were ment to be together sins ever. like i was created esspecialy for him. when we met - i couldn't believe how many things in our lives were a complete match - like we were each others mirrors emotionally, rationally - everything .

my problem with this dream is - why is someone pulling me away by force from that tree - i don't see who it is . I think it was a woman but unknown to me.who could that be when no one in my life is opposed of that union ( at least not that i know ) . And how can a tree be interpreted in a context of love and relationships.

Thank you ...

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 28, Belgrade

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Re: a tree and a love question

Veronika,
WHOAA! You must have really had a lot of friends tell you you are making a mistake in having this relationship.
You answered the question. You have examined the possibilities, have a logical perspective, rational thinking. You can look beyond that and look to other possibilities. What about the father/daughter relationship? That may have to do with the 'Someone from behind me is pulling me away and i struggle because i want that tree and no other.'

Dreams address not only the current waking life experiences but also the underlying reasons for personality, attitudes, emotions. The tree is old, a reference to current waking life experiences no doubt. But are there 'older' aspects that need to be examined? Perhaps your boredom with 'lesser minds' plays some how in this possibility {not that I feel I am better or smarter than anyone else, I know my limitations - the problem is there are so many mental midgets in this world}. Trees often symbolize growth. The tree that you want may have to do with growth. This older man provide those things that lend themselves to such growth. But what would be in the way of that growth. Early life experiences, old experiences? Fairy tales are for children. This may also point to the past, childhood. Those influences may be pulling you away, the struggle may not be about the relationship per say but something else or something related.
What is your temperament? Your response suggests a strong will person. Look at these possibilities and let me know what you find.

As for the younger woman/older man relationship. Older men dream of such things. If you have found the right man then I say go for it. A fortunate guy is he.

Jerry

Myths-Dreams-Symbols is Sponsored by:
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Re: a tree and a love question

Well... maybe there is something in the idea that something is standing between my growth and me now... i feel that i am changing a lot and i that i am loosing some parts of my personality, that i am replacing them with that "new me" .. It is a little bit scary because it is unfamiliar - I am unfamiliar to me and that is not how i am used to feel about myself.
About the fairy tales - i know that they are just stories but sometimes in my daydreaming i like to imagine impossible things and i am a little bit afraid that i will loose my imagination if i "grow up" entirely and that that will make me a less awesome mom i want to be one day...
i am entering in a serious faze in my life - big projects lots of responsabillity i am focused on a new work which is completely different from anything i new before and even though i now i will do good i also now that it will make me change and that i will lose some parts of my personality i like very much ... i like pushing my limits but this time it is big and i do want it but - something is slowing me ( stopping me) and i feel that - the show must go on ... i feel ready but .. my mom said to me that it is because of saturne the planet who is in something in some house and sign and that it has an effect on blocking my efforts and that it will go off to another position soon and that i will feel an explosion of energy and blablabla..

You have helped me by putting this in the open.. thank you very much! some things are clearer now..

can we continue this conversation via e mail?

bye

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 28, Belgrade

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Re: a tree and a love question

Veronika,
Improvement and understanding is what the forum is about. It usually takes a lot of effort to realize what one's life is all about. Giving real thought to it is how you make discoveries. Taking time to think about it is something few people will or are able to do. Jung's Individuation Process is all about 'thinking' about oneself. A self psychology from life's earliest memories and experiences. Things come up that were never realized. Discoveries that can enlighten and release a person from unconscious stimuli that can control conscious activities. The mind is a fascinating organ.

Yes, feel free to contact me by e-mail. I am more than happy to provide whatever assistance I can.

Jerry

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Re: a tree and a love question

Thank you.. could you please respond me to my mail aleksandraksn@hotmail.com
i don't have a mail account that can link me directly to your;s from this forum..

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 28, Belgrade

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