Thank you Jerry for your reply. I've always liked Jung, so... and yes you really sounded spot on on my dream. Thank you.

Would you feel like giving a piece on advise on something that isn't a dream, but that's being a bit of a nightmare! If you allow me the word play? I've been renting a room to an american 21yearold girl with eating disorders, of which she immediately informed me about saying they were past, but actually lok very present to me. She's also a compulsive lier and spends most of the times in her room, in bed, when she doesnt go to her Italian language course in the moring which she sometimes skips. She behaves as though she was normal, even talk about food a lot, but she is of course very depressed. Initially I felt so sorry for her and wanted to help her and was very 'motherly' toward her, but then when I realized her lies and her constant presence in the home, I got agitated and I feel claustrophobic in my own home and annoyed by her varied distructive behaviours. I wish I had more compassion, I did have it, but she made me feel cheated and now i distanced myself and just try to get on with my life. I offerd twice to introduce her to freidns of mine who are her age, but she refused. I can't wait till she leaves in 5 weeks, and am wondering how do i get through this time? But i wonder why is her behaviour upsetting me so?. There is something negative, like a negative spirit I feel about her, I feel both liked and disliked by her...I just think there is nothing I can do to help her as she really doesn't care for any help... sorry didn't mean this to be so long, also this isn't a dream, so not sure you'd want to respond. but any thoght you may have, I will sure aprpeciate. Thank you .

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Leti,
You have these mixed feelings because you do have a conscience and you do care about others. This is a good thing, an example of what Jung thought of as an inherent spiritual aspect. For those who really want to help them self, provide assistance. Some people, too many people have pushed this spiritual aspect deep into the darkness of their souls and could care less. But it comes back on them sometime and somewhere in their lives. The law of Karma, cause and effect.

There is little if anything you can do to help the girl. She needs a trained therapist and that may not be enough unless she wants to be helped. It is so easy to let the mind do want it wants and and the body will oblige. You do not need to feel guilty about how you feel, this girl thrives on vulnerabilities, her own and others who try to help her. I would tell her straight up just before she leaves to find help. Describe to her what you feel her problems are. That is the best you can do. Until then keep your distance. If she wants real help she must be the one to seek it out. From a professional.

I had a 'friend' who did something similar. I caught on pretty quick and had he move out. He went on to 'game' the system to the max, churches, people, government agencies. And he is 60 years old, has done it more than once. My thinking is to always care. But emotions must never shadow logic. Being too emotional is what causes problems. It can blind a person to what is really there. Always trust your senses. Change the negatives when/where you can but don't let the negatives change you. Being spiritual is one thing. Being foolish and letting others take aadvantage is another

Good luck.

Jerry

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Thanks so very much Jerry, how refreshing to read what you share!

I just needed to hear it all from someone else, although I now realized I had heard my own small voice saying some of what you say, like I've expressed enough compassion, now time to distance myself (without feeling guilty about it!), and also, i'm out of my depths here she needs a therapist, and also I don't feel an inch of her really wanting help, there is really is nothing I can do... and such a negative spirit in her!

I think this experience highlighted a vulnerability in me to feel guilty .... I will follow your advice and hold on for the next few weeks left... it could acutally be a good 'exercise' if difficult! for me.

Thank you for your help!

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Oh it comes with practice! About 30 years now!

Don't be put off if you only remember little bits of your dreams, write them down all the same, if you really want to listen to them. Get yourself a nice, special notebook for them, keep it on your nighttable with a pen, and see what happens.

You may find in time you also will learn to remember so many details and so much and more of your dreams.

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