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Relationship

Firstly, my partner and I have not had a very good relationship over the last 6.5 months. Yesterday she left me and afterwards she texted me saying "I'll speak to you in a couple of days."

In this dream her and I had been in Melbourne for a week. We'd had a pretty good week. The time came to go home. I wanted to book a flight. She wanted to catch a train. It would be a 2hr flight or a 2 day train trip. After fighting for a while, I said "Fine, we'll catch the train." We booked it that day and jumped on it with our light brown large fluffy dog. There was a carriage on this train in which animals could be kept so that's where we sent the dog. We proceeded to sit down on the train. Everyone on the train was with their partner, all looked incredibly happy. We sat down next to each other and did not speak at all. We stared ahead and sat there. I felt really uneasy and awkward so I continuously got up to go to the toilet. Not because I had to go, but because I wanted to get away. Every time I came back to our seat, she had a huge smile on her face which would disappear within seconds of me taking a seat. The day passed and night fell. We walked to the sleeping carriage on the train that had beds. We laid down on one next to each other and she fell asleep without a word. In the morning, she woke and, rolled over and kissed me. She said "Good morning Hun, how are you?"From there, the rest of the train trip was great. We were talking, laughing and enjoying ourselves. When we reached our destination, her friend picked us up. I had to get out of the car before her as we did not live together. I got out and lent in her window to give her a kiss. I said I love you and she replied with "I love you too. I'll speak to you in a couple of days."

That was it. Someone please help. We aren't together right now and I really love her and want us to work. Any help greatly appreciated.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 19

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? No

Re: Relationship

Trent,
The 'pretty good week' probably is a reflection of the long term conflict {6 1/2 months} you have experienced with your partner {our dreams are reflections of our true emotions and not what we perceive them to be}. It may be saying there are good weeks and there are bad weeks which would indicate there are positive aspects to the relationship that are strong but other aspects that need work. Your booking a flight and her catching a train may suggest different approaches to the relationship. You want to 'get there' fast whereas she wants to take her time. The fluffy dog would symbolize the emotional vs practical aspects of the relationship. My guess the practical aspects have given way to the emotional leaving less room for 'straight thinking' on your part {your dreams are about you and other known people in your dreams are in relationship to you}. There is too little communication {at least at times} between not only you and your partner but also your emotional self vs your practical side. As in many instances the male part of a relationship is prone to want things immediately whereas the female had rather take time to digest the possibilities. Is there a particular aspect in this relationship that fits that description? If so that would be a great part of the conflict that needs to be resolved.

There also seems to be a conflict about the relationship to do with the 'long term'. Are there commitment issues? Also be aspects to do with 'sharing' the burden {trains carry 'emotional' loads and your partner is interested in the taking the train} that needs to be worked out . When you think about the relationship it is a positive but the reality is there are problems. This may suggest there are aspects to the relationship that deeply interest you but the practical aspects are different than you vision them to be. Again, are there issues with committing?

The part about sleep separate would be the conflicts that separate the two of you. There is likely times when these issues take control and you feel separate from each other. The last part seems to indicate a real love for each other despite the differences. The good times out number the bad but it is up to you whether the relationship will work {you have to take the lead by getting out of the car first}.

What are the issues that come between you and your partner? Something about the relationship has caused her to take a 'time out' from the relationship. What is that about? Does it have to do with long term commitment or an ability to be realistic about aspects of the relationship? Also possible conflicts with your partner over 'sharing/carrying the load'.

Finally, the part about speaking with each other in a couple of days may indicate a need to communicate with yourself. All dreams reflect not only the outer world experiences {the actual experiences that are on going in your life and the relationship} but also the inner world, a communication with yourself. You are conflicted about aspects of the relationship and because there is a need to have an inner communication it may suggest deeper issues are involved. You may need to work with yourself in resolving these inner issues more than you need to work with your partner. The issues that bother you would involve deeper issues within you that have to do with experiences/influences from early life. Again, the commitment issue comes to mind when examining this dream.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 63 Space Coast, Fla.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Host Dream Forum

Re: Relationship

So yes there have been a few commitment issues. She has had some lying problems within the relationship. Great big stories she's made about about rape, abuse and a few other things have affected our relationship quite a lot. Is there any more information you could use?

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 19

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? No

Re: Relationship

Trent,
With that kind of attitude she possesses I would look at possible ending the relationship. Or if you are committed to the relationship trying to find a way to get her psychological help. The dream doesn't address the issues of the rape and abuse allegations. It does seem to point to a need to examine your feelings about the relationship. Are you wanting to continue the relationship despite her allegations and strange behavior? What you say about her accusations of rape and abuse point toward deep emotional conflicts on her part. Where do you stand in continuing the relationship and how do you explain her strange behavior? The failure to communicate is difficult enough in a relationship but when strange behavior on her part takes place then there needs to be a careful and thoughtful examination of the possibilities of continuing.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 63 Space Coast, Fla.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Host Dream Forum

Re: Relationship

Trent

I FULLY agree with Jerry. You need to sit back and truly look at the relationship. A relationship CAN NOT be built on lies or it just crumbles. HONESTY is the key and if she can't be truthful with you then she needs to take time to work on herself. YOU CAN NOT CHANGE HER...she NEEDS TO DO IT HERSELF. Lying, cheating and being sneaky...do YOU REALLY deserve this treatment....THAT IS NOT LOVE. One MUST love themselves first....than only can you love someone else.

AGAIN, a relationship needs to be built upon: TRUST, honesty, communication, being equals (not you being the caretaker in this relationship or any other).

I am only saying this after being with a husband for 13 years that treated me like trash...because I handed over that power to him. Psst also a relationship is not built on one partners needs - can't be one sided - it must be equal - and some peeps are caretakers - we are the ones who suffer because we feel we are responsible for the other person...only to a point the rest is totally up to them.

I can relate it's hard to let go of someone who you love....sometimes it's important to step back - IF...she is willing suggest therapy for herself and than a couple's session.
Best of luck.....dreams are powerful

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: NJ

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} female

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