Nannanut,
If we look at the dream on the level of an inner communication concerning your anima sending your friend {female} could be 'sending' emotional aspects to the deep distance of your unconscious. Or/and it could represent sending the emotional aspects away from being a conflict in your life. The unconscious is a place we are most unfamiliar with {I don't know where}. The darkness is also a symbol for the unconscious, those unseen aspects. The slight illumination of the golden light would be a breakthrough to the deep unconscious associated with whatever emotional aspect you have 'sent off'. This would be a positive event in you are happy for her {the anima quality}.

Dreams are a communication between the unconscious to the conscious self {albeit while asleep}. The conversation is with yourself, a long talk about emotional issues. This is a good thing in that you are actively participating in dialog with your true self {which is what the unconscious is}. It could be you are consciously engaged in a dialog, on a path of discovery and personal growth. In fact the whole dream does seem to point to this conscious engagement {is this true?}. You have to go a long way in reaching this deep unconscious part of yourself {consciously you may have travel a distance already in seeking answers}. Because you have engaged this dialog with the unconscious {We talked a little then she departed} it may be you are at that transition point of discovery, 'sending' this emotional aspect away in the context of 'doing away with the emotional conflict' the dream is attempting to communicate {a different sending using the same phrase}. You are no longer being 'crushed' by the emotional energies. Engaging the unconscious would make you happy since it will lead to a balanced and harmonious life {if you follow through}.

From the dream I get the impression there has been a breakthrough in learning about your true self. It does seem also to point to a conscious effort. The dream is positive and the emotional issue could involve the 'crush' as well as deeper emotional issues. Let' s seen what the other dream has to offer.

The Second Dream

I will analyze this dream on the level of the anima. There may be recent waking life experiences that fit in the dialog and actions but I will focus on the inner instead of the outer {only you can know the outer conscious experiences}.
The opening statement of all dreams are important in they set the stage for what the dream is trying to communicate. The house is you and there is an aspect that has an 'abandoned' quality. Then follow the dream action and it will fit conscious aspects as well as reveal unconscious aspects. Abandonment could represent a need to 'abandon' previous emotions that are impeding personal growth. The end to the 'relationship' with your crush could be a conscious event that fits here. But there would be other aspects also involved. Compare this to your waking life and see where it fits.

The unknown people are aspects of yourself, unknown qualities. Being a stranger is not being known qualities. The European aspect may have personal associations. The clothing is your outer self, what you wear and appear to be in your ego life. Or how you perceive yourself. The 19th century could be a reference to the age 19 which would have been a 'weird' time in your life. The modern dress is your current self. The manor could be a statement about your whole self {the principles that make of the foundations of your life} and the affects/influences to recent conscious experiences that are related those foundations {personality traits}. There is the abandoned aspect on both levels, conscious and unconscious {anima}. While traversing this experience {inner as well as outer} you {house} is set on fire {passion, anger, devastation, change}. It quickly burned may suggest a very fast moving event. The friends would be positive aspects which may suggest inner qualities. the 'I' is the ego which may be alluding to not being consciously moved by the experiences {but unconsciously yes}. Go to the lowest level would point to the unconscious. This may be a statement about the ego {I} has not acknowledged the inner aspects but has the outer. A work in progress for the inner self.

The man would also {on an unconscious level} be a part of you to do with the past. Red has similar symbolic representations as does a fire. The talk is about the past and the present self. Plywood is the outer layer of a 'house' and to break through to the conscious self requires a release of emotional energies. The unconscious aspects that motivate your conscious actions need to escape the emotional turmoil {fire/red} that is the result of conscious experiences {past experiences}.

Summary
My impression from both the dreams is the conscious experience involving your crush stoked an unconscious cord to do with emotions. I sense there is a progression of one related to the other which would fit with your statement, I allowed myself to feel the pain but I never let myself to be driven emotionally by it, although I'm can be driven emotionally rather easily. Would it be normal for such an experience to have driven you emotionally? Could it be you have progressed to where those emotional energies no longer control you? The dreams are addressing the difficult times involving the crush but are also addressing the deeper issues to do with the motivators that have controlled you emotionally. Those would be experience/influences from early life that laid the foundations for your personality and who you are today.

Then there is the abandonment issue {abandoned house}. Are there past experiences from early life that involved abandonment? If so then you ca look to those experiences to understand the motivating energies to your adult actions. The dreams seem to be stating you have gotten past those {whatever they were, abandonment issues or otherwise} and have progressed in your maturity as well as self discovery. It took your crush to awaken the inner issues and you have made great progress in what would have been a much worse incident if you had not been able to overcome the motivating energies. The reason why you were able to do so would involve a natural aging and wisdom but also a conscious desire to discover who you are. Being 'abandoned' in a relationship {with your crush} is a strong force to recon with. Either you wither on the vine or you become stronger and move on. I had that experience {end of a serious relationship} 35 years ago and it changed me tremendously {I became stronger from it}.

Does this fit with who you are? You may want to look back at your childhood and see what experience/influences there were that would be motivators to your personality and life. I was able to understand actions from my 20s when I search my past. Mine experiences were of the classical motif 'son seeking the father' which resulted in 'looking for love in all the wrong places' The first {soon seeking a father who abandoned him} was the motivator for looking for a substitute love for the father. I was unconsciously driven by the motivating energies. We all have these energies and most often they begin with childhood experiences/influences.

Jerry

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Jerry,

What you said is true on the issue of abandonment. My mother left me when I was 13. I supposed that the even left a scar on my unconscious level and I embarked on a continuous journey to pursue intimate affection/love from female counterpart to fulfil the lack of maternal affection. And I also assume that the rejection on my crush has just awaken this issue; therefore both events are co-related on bith conscious and unconscious level.

Now I know the origin of the driving force, what do I have to do next to pursue the course of self discovery. I believe that the sooner I know about my true self, the better I acn set my life on the correct path.

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Nattanut,
That is hard to answer without knowing your full life story. Pursuing answers requires an investigation of the early life experiences and influences {abandonment by mother} and the resulting consequences from those. Continuous efforts to pursue intimate affection is likely one result of the mother issue. Knowing it is an unconscious motivator and consciously seeking to control it would be how to handle those desires. But it is much more complicated since there are likely other factors associated with the mother abandonment issue. If you have access to a therapist {preferably Jungian} then you could take that route. I used Jung's Individuation Process to resolve my issues {abandonment by my father} but I was 42 when I began that process and had already overcome much of my dependency naturally {maturity and changes in life}. If you have the discipline and ability to look at your whole life, recognize the stimulus for who you are and make changes where necessary you could take the same route. It is as much an inner journey, a psychological endeavor on your own. In the process of doing this you will discover more than just the causes and answers to your psychological issues, you will also discover the important aspects that make life worth living. Creativity and spirituality {not religion but the laws of nature, cause and effect}. You put yourself on a level above the norm because you are leaving behind the old self and finding the new. The ego driven, materialistic self transitions to a life of simplicity. Simplifying life, reducing emotional attachments {having a limited number of close relationships, romantic or otherwise} finding that thing in life that gives meaning to it {creativity} and giving to life only in positive ways {spirituality}. This is the Jungian approach and takes a long time to get there {the reason discipline is necessary}. Few people try and even fewer succeed.

If you are interested in this process you can start with my Power of Dreams website. If you find you have the ability and desire to learn more {Jung can be difficult, a reason why I look to Joseph Campbell as a tutor of Jungian psyche} then my Myths-Dreams-Symbols website has 500+ pages of Jungian content that takes you to the deeper issues to do with the psyche process. Again this all requires time, effort and discipline. But the rewards are not only resolving the personal conflicts but obtaining a world, no cosmic view of life. You put yourself above all others because you are not limited by ego choices but are guided by natural solutions {mythology is the universal source that informs and supports the individual story}. Whereas most people are limited by their personal experiences, the knowledge of the cosmic view of life opens the psyche to deeper understanding of the processes that govern our existence. It doesn't necessarily make you smarter than the other person but it does make you more informed. There is a 'secret' knowledge and only by studying the cosmic view can you get past the limitations of the ego. Our dreams helps us resolve the personal issues but in the process takes us into the field of a metaphysical plane that offers insights not available to those who abide by society's dictates {political, social and religious}. You are free to explore all possibilities and not limited by the few choices that your personal ego world offers.

A lot to think about. But if you are serious about finding wholeness and balance in life there are paths to doing so. This path will take you there if you 'connect' with it. For me it was an instantaneous recognition that Jung's formula was my path. Overnight I went from a ego driven, couch potato/sports nut to a person who lived in the 'dream world' and became successful in working with dreams and learned web design and built the websites I have listed above. The old person underwent a death and resurrection/rebirth {the true meaning of Jesus on the cross-it is psychological} and become something totally different {see my profile}. I am my true self and live life on my terms, no longer controlled by those motivating energies from childhood. Nor am I obligated to social duty, doing what I am told. Instead I live life simple and have few obligations other than those I choose to have. Less emotional stress, not attached to emotional situations or the materials world, a better life on all levels {I also have made physical fitness a part of my lifestyle for the past 35 years}. And because I live by the laws of Karma/cause and effect things naturally fall into place. The helping hands of fate are always there to support me.

If you don't take this opportunity to find your true self. Consider my journey before I discovered Jung. Three failed marriages {3 wonderful women} due to the unconscious drive to fulfill that never received love from my father {the son seeking the father motif-Luke Skywalker seeking his father}. There was always a void I could never put my finger on and when things got rough I ran {as did my father}. Your pattern motif is of abandonment and seeking to fulfill what was not provided as a child. Different parent, very similar unconscious motivators. Unless those energies are resolved they will continue to have control over your life. You can live life as is and may find happiness but you will never find true harmony. It also impedes the creative self which is the one aspect that gives true meaning to life. The adage, pay me now {take time to do what has to be done} or pay me later {never doing what was needed} is something I have witnessed with my friends I grew up with. Most all are in miserable lives, dependent on drugs, food, sex, alcohol. At 64 life is very much different for me. Nothing can ever be perfect {the first Buddhist saying is 'life is full of suffering'} but my life is so much more better than it would have been if I had not undergone the transformation. At 20 you have a great opportunity to live life to the max, not an life of ego but of true identity. If you take this opportunity, when you get to my age you will be a sage, possessing a knowledge few possess. You will have paid your debt to ego long ago and will be free to explore the farthest dimensions of the possibilities.

Jerry

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