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Stumped and Confused (long)

I have a background in psychology and this dream has really just stumped me. Any insight would be appreciated!

For some waking life context, I have always been in some sort of conflict with my parents and close friends, although it is more on unspoken level. I have also been trying to reconcile the idea of reincarnation with my personal theology and asked for some sort of clarity on the subject. The first part of the dream seems like it could fit this, but I’m really not sure.

Part 1:
I was with my parents and I could have sworn one other person who I knew, but I never saw, sort of a shadow or presence, and we were walking through an old historic looking neighborhood and saw a house for sale. Since no one was home, my parents decided to go in even though it was not an open house. I went along with them even though I felt uncomfortable.

The house, farmhouse-esque style, was not very impressive from the outside at all. It looked well maintained but not flashy or perfect, and then I realized it was mean to look this way. Once inside it was the most beautiful house I have ever seen. It was laid out in a unusual but beautifully perfect way. It was all Early American furniture and architecture, which I thought was interesting since I don't gravitate toward this style in waking life. The floors creaked emphasizing the age, even though I knew it was supposed to be a newer house.

The front facing part of the house had an enormous grade/slope and all the furniture and decor was made to match. I wanted to slide down the hill, which began in the kitchen, but wasn’t sure I would actually have enough momentum to make it. I think I saw something slide down or threw something down first, I’m not sure. I decided to try anyway, why not right? I slide down the hill purely for the fun of it (I wasn’t falling or pushed), then got up and met the owner of the house who had just appeared/returned. She told me the house is not for sale even though it is shown as being for sale. I went to go find my parents and that other person to leave since I felt mildly embarrassed that we were intruding. I wound up in the flat/level part of the house which was toward the back. I remember being happy to see that there was a second kitchen on level ground. I got the impression that this was the part of the house she spent more time in. It was also a little bit darker than the rest of the house. The owner sort of looked impatient for us to leave so I insisted we leave and she said, “that’s a good idea.” She didn’t seem hostile though at least toward me. She also knew my name, though I never told her. Actually she looked like the image I have of myself in my head but with darker hair.

We leave and now notice that the whole area was block after block of old historic looking homes with tree lined streets and sidewalks, a little neglected looking, though just old and natural. Not overly cared for, but not let go. Cracks in the sidewalk, leaves everywhere (a lot of leaves but it was not yet fall), diffused sunlight, quiet. It was oddly beautiful and peaceful. Come to think of it I saw no children or families or other people for that matter. No cars either. Starting to seem creepy now, but it didn’t feel that way in the dream. I did however feel like I wasn’t supposed to be there and my parents were definitely not supposed to be there. I kind of felt like I was walking a fine line. The most confusing part about this whole thing was the old/new mixture. It was new that was mean to look old, yet it was actually old. Maybe it was partially new and partially old? Old then made new but made to look old? I can’t figure it out.

Part 2:
The next part of the dream involved myself and my friend of 15 years. We were going, or she decided, we were going to steal a car for the evening from a big car dealership. We pass a few hideously painted metallic coupes that I wanted to drive because I was thinking of buying one (I am in the process of buying a new car in waking life), but she found a very expensive car, I think it was a Jaguar, that was open with the keys inside. She got in the backseat and leaned forward to turn the car on. I was not comfortable with this at all, but I went along with it and got in the driver’s seat. I barely made it into the car when the owner came by with the police in tow already. I don't know if this was just bad timing or a trap or a bit of both. I get taken to jail but my friend disappears for the remainder of the dream. I tell the police I was only trying to rent a car so I could see how it drove because I was thinking of buying that car since I sold my previous car. I knew this was partially true and that I never wanted to steal a car in the first place. But I knew my friend did and I did nothing to stop her. The officer, a woman, seemed to believe me, but continued to book me. She seemed to know I was covering for someone else and appeared to commend me for it. I remember my lawyer, another woman, and the judge, can’t remember the gender, beginning my hearing and that was when I woke up. I remember wanting to just tell the judge the truth, while withholding some information and without implicating my friend, because I figured the truth would exonerate me.

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Re: Stumped and Confused (long)


Let me rephrase the dream in metaphorical language as I 'read' it, in the context of the personal information you provided. Then I will provide a summary. I can only see along the periphery of the dream and not see specifics from your personal life {anyone who states they can provide specific experiences is fooling them-self}. You will need to fit the general outline to your personal life. This is a long analysis {I usually don't break own the whole dream}.

The 'shadow' presence would be an unknown/unrecognized aspect {one other person you unconsciously know} within yourself. The old historic neighborhood may be addressing the history with your parents as well as this 'shadow' aspect. No one being home may suggest there is something missing {the house is you}. The issue with your parents is not an open issue/house {conflict with parents/close friends on an unspoken level}. You go along with the flow even though it is an uncomfortable position {conflict with parents?}.
{Note: close relationships are one of the few times a literal application of a symbol in dreams is possible}

The farmhouse style house {again you} would represent a need to expand or grow {could point to you in relationship with parents/close friends}. The outside is the conscious ego and from that view the relationships are not impressive. This outer self is meant to be the way it is because of the relationship with your parents {early life experience/influences}. Was your childhood OK, not perfect but in an acceptable environment {the material basics in life were provided}?

The inside is your true self which is 'intended' {by nature} to be a beautiful self. You may have unusual aspects about your inner life but otherwise it basically follows a natural pattern {everyone has a pattern of development}. The early American furniture would be alluding to early 'furnishings' of experiences/influences. The creaked 'foundations' {floors} are the past, aspects that reside within you in the present time {old emotions striving to grow/newer house}.

The front {conscious ego} has a 'slant/inclination' and everything about your life matches that decor {foundational experiences/influences from life}. Wanting to slide down the hill is the 'inner' desire to resolve the emotional struggles that began from early life {kitchen is where the emotional nourishment, the beginnings of the emotional life is prepared}. There is doubt to being able to resolve these issues because but you give it a try {perhaps alluding to actual attempts in your conscious life}. There is a 'fun' aspect to the conflicts {something you would have to name}. Consciously you may know it is un vain to try but why not anyway, make a game of it perhaps? {or play the game}.

The 'she' is an aspect of yourself and the game others are playing is not who ou really are {owner of the house that is not for sale}. You may go along with it {shown it was for sale} but you are embarrassed to let yourself do so {these actions may also be addressing actual experiences as well as an outline of emotional relationships/conflicts}. These emotional conflicts are intruding on your true self {owner of the inner house}. The flat level is your objective aspects which unconsciously {back} rule how you think and act {not in the manner others do}. This second self, the inner true self. is able to provide the emotional nourishment needed to sustain you when having to confront negative situations. This is the part of you you need to and wish to spend more time with, your true self, not for sale to the games people play. But there are darker aspects {unconscious} involved {foundations}. You have little patience with the 'outer' world that causes conflicts in your life {impatience may be a part of your personality}. But this is a good thing since by not associating with those who cause conflict is the better thing to do. You are not inwardly hostile to this aspect of yourself because it is the real you {the image you have of yourself}. The darker hair {thinking aspects} is the unconscious attitudes which, although you are an objective person, are govern by the foundations from your early life {as everyone is}.

The 'old historical self' was a little neglected but otherwise normal {a reference to early life and parents?}. Were your parents 'present' but not accountable, not overly attentive to your needs? Leaves are the dead parts that have fallen off the tree {family tree}, the sunlight which should have provided great emotional energies was diffused. There is/was an oddity to your relationship with your parents? Nothing to denote the 'children', not a real family environment, no real friends. No direction in life was provided {cars}. You were not there because your parents didn't treat you as if you were important? You had to walk a fine line emotionally as a child? The old/new mixture is what you grew up with mixed to who you are now. The old aspects/experiences/influences were not who you want to be but in reality a lot of them are. These are the unresolved issues the dream is attempting to help you figure out {a function of dreams is to help the dreamer resolve emotional conflicts}.

Part 2
The friend of 15 years {that number likely has personal associations beyond what I address} probably has aspects you identity with or has shared experiences. She is a part of you {thus she is you}. Stealing a car may point to the need to take control of the direction of your life {car}. But there are probably actual waking experiences involved also, but not literally as spelled out in the dream {especially since you are thinking of buying a car}. This aspect of yourself involves 'costly' alternatives, keys to who you are and how to give direction so you can personally grow {on a personal level it may point to actual decisions about the cost of the car you are in the process of buying}. Being in the backseat may indicate you are not in control of the process related to directions in life. Being in the drivers seat and being uncomfortable with that suggests you may be a position that would put you in control but not a comfortable one {this could be alluding to the waking life experience where games are being played}. Your true self {owner of the car} has a higher authority that controls {or should control} unacceptable behavior {police}. You are in a position where you feel trapped, the conscious self having to do one thing {playing the games} and your true self trying to get you to do the right thing. You are confined by the foundations you were brought up with and not by associations related to your friend {aspects you identify with and can use when needed}. Renting the car is only temporarily possessing the tools you need {direction in life}, not something you now possess that will see you through. You would need to leave the old self behind {selling your old car} in order to buy a new self. You know this to be true {the female police office is your controlling authority} but you continue to 'book' your life based on the unconscious motivators {early life experiences/influences}. Your ego self {which does all it can to thwart the true self} covers your true desires for personal growth, hiding the unconscious factors which are recognized as the real controlling agents in your life. You are your own attorney {have an ability to take control, lawyer over the unconscious motivators}, and your own judge {all these people, female, are aspects within you}. Inwardly you know these truths but the ego self covers this up by withholding the ability/information to realize the unconscious aspects. Implicating your friend, the shared aspects you identity with, would let you realize these unconscious truths. That is the only thing that can exonerate you from the controlling factors in your life.

I see childhood issues and relationship with parents in early life as part of the emotional issues that need to be resolved but sense there are other factors as well. A relatively normal childhood{?} but where the parents never showed or displayed a lot of love and attention. These would be motivating factors throughout life and have some control over your personality and actions as an adult. I do sense other factors. Reading the dream and about your true self, I got the impression there was something other than just parenting involved. It could be neurologically related. Or an experience{s} beyond parenting {although that seems to be key to the emotional issues}. Possibly other experiences this dream has not touched on {with future dreams doing so}. Having problems with conflict with personal friends could have evolved from childhood but there may be issues of trust underneath those conflicts. Dreams tend to build on themselves when you consciously get involved in analyzing them with one dream revealing one thing and subsequent dreams revealing more. Of course as long as the issues remain unresolved the dreams will 'replay' the patterns but using different symbols/images. I'll let you respond to my analysis and see what fits and how it does in your waking {as well as recognizable unconscious} life.

A couple of other issues. Reconciling reincarnation with your personal theology. Is that about spiritual concerns or more tuned to objective thinking as opposed to metaphysical possibilities? From the dream I get the sense you are an objective thinking type yet there are aspects to that objectivity that seem to beat odds with other aspects of your personality/psyche. They may be separate experiences but related in an unconscious way.

Also on the shadow issue. Anytime a dream brings up this archetypal aspect, even whne there is no specific image in a dream related to the shadow, it needs to be considered. These too may be revaled {if applicable} in furure dreams. If there are other experience beyond those related to parents then the shadow existence may have a prime spot in your next 'featured' dream.


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Re: Stumped and Confused (long)

Thank you for your analysis Jerry, it was interesting and enlightening. As far as I can remember this is the first appearance of the shadow, so I’ll be interested to see what happens when it appears again.

As to my relationship with my parents, they provided for me materially growing up but not much emotionally and still don’t. I’ve always felt left out in the cold there. My mother was particularly critical and tried her best to mold me into what she wanted, or probably into herself, but that did not work. I was rather resistive even though I used to try to do what she wanted to end the criticism and conflict which of course it never did. I’ve always tried to be what other people wanted while still trying to be true to myself but it has been rather difficult. It is a game that I really don’t want to be playing. I definitely don’t have much patience for it but have to play it anyway.

You mentioned that there may be something other than parenting involved. Neurologically? I’m not sure I know what you mean. I have always had a conflicting personality if that is what you mean. I feel like I am both objective and emotional at the same time among other conflicts.

In regards to the reincarnation, I am trying to reconcile it as objectively as possible but I know there are emotions involved.

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Re: Stumped and Confused (long)

The relationship with your parents was the primary issue I sensed from the dream {which you confirmed}. The early life relationship with parents {and the environment you grow up in} is key to personality traits later in life. These experiences/influences are what a child experiences first, and consistently, they are ingrained in the psyche. They become unconscious motivators for personality and actions as an adult. This was true in my life and when I began to study Jungian psyche I was able to see how the early life influences affected my actions and decisions as an adult {especially in my 20s and 30s}. My motif {universal pattern of behavior} was the son looking for the father who was never there {a Luke Skywalker in the 30th century}. We all have a pattern of behavior {many women are Cinderella types just as many men fit the Luke Skywalker motif} and to realize and understand those energies is to set oneself free from negative influences that often wreck a life {3 failed marriages on my part}.

As for 'something other' than parental relationships. The inherent characteristics we are born with have to be considered when looking at personality and the unseen forces that govern a life. Siblings grow up in the same environment and will be influenced in many ways by the same by the experiences/influences from that environment. But we are all different and those differences are inherent from natural ingredients that make up our psyche {psyche - Greek word for 'soul'. The 'totality' of the conscious and unconscious life. The mind considered as an organic system reaching all parts of the body and serving to adjust the total organism to the needs or demands of the environment}. Neurologically we are governed by the 'organics' as well as the psychological influences. These organic energies are related to Jung's archetypes but are also separate from them due to the individual makeup of each organic body. A person is an introvert not primarily because of their early life environment but because they are naturally inclined to be an introvert. It is how they are wired by nature. This may be what I sense from the dream, the neurological influences I mentioned. Your conflicting personality may be a natural trait as much as it is from the influences of the relationship with parents. The relationship with parents would re-enforce what is already naturally provided. I often sense personality traits/factors in dreams and sometimes the neurological factors as well. Your dream pointed to a relationship with parents and early life {as often is the case with most people} but also provided 'clues' to other controlling energies. The neurological possibilities just happen to come to mind when I was analyzing your dream. I rely heavily on intuitive sensing when I analyze dreams.

Dreams and Personality
The ability to sense personality as well as other 'deeper' unconscious energies is not really that unusual. The dream is showing us the true self, all aspects of the self including those aspects that nature provides. It is merely having an ability to translate the images and patterns of actions in a dream from a symbolic/metaphorical reference into a vocabulary that can be understood. Jung's concepts on dreams provide us with the instructions on just how to do that. A developed intuitive sense/mind along with an in-depth study of Jungian dream psychological provides the necessary skills and knowledge for a person to read dreams. Today there are quite a few who fit this criteria. With the internet there is an easy and rapid disseminated of tons of information related to the topic {not just the psychology but the other sciences related to the brain, body and spirit} that allows anyone interested to educate oneself. If the subject 'catches' you {as it did me} then a natural movement to it would be a normal occurrence. For me it is an intuitive connection and I have enjoyed great success in interpreting dreams. That success is cataloged in the 15,000+ posted dreams, interpretations, responses and comments at this Dream Forum {on line since 2005}. The Dream Forum design and construction is my creative self, self expression by means of creativity. That too is a product from my Jungian education {bot of which I am self taught}.

Re-incarnation is a subject I would not give a second thought to if it were not a core principle of Eastern philosophy. Eastern philosophy is far more developed and practical than Western. A lot of what Jung proposes in a metaphysical sense is based on Eastern concepts {along with Gnosticism and alchemy}. But even with that I don't spend a lot of time dwelling on it. It is not something you can 'objectively' prove. But unlike a heaven or hell which can be and has been scientifically dis-proven, re-incarnation can't be summarily dismissed. There are many grey areas involved with the issue and I am open minded to any 'proof' that science may offer in the future. Until there is concrete evidence of re-incarnation I relegate to the drawer where all other concepts to do with emotions and not objectivity are stored. There are too many issues in this life to be concerned about let alone worry about what the after life may hold. I do believe in the soul as an energy that survives a physical death but beyond that I leave it alone. My concept of the soul and the human experiences is this life is but one adventure for the soul. Where it travels to after this life no one knows. Making this life count is where I put my energies. Think psychologically {objectively and not emotionally}, live spiritually {within the laws of Karma, cause and effect}. It works for me.


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