ECatherine,
I apologize for not providing a response yesterday. My laptop died on me and a full day of obligations.

If you will look at both dreams as metaphor for the relationship then the symbols should fit with how it played out. Not only in a literal sense as far as the experiences you shared with him but also in application to the relationship. The dream language "we were traveling basically around the world together, seeing history" would be metaphor for traveling around the relationship and seeing the history of the relationship. The 'shooting' would have been the stimulus for the dream. All dreams have at least two meanings/applications and your experience it fits the actual conscious experiences with him as well as applicable in the relationship.

The same goes for the dream you posted in your last entry. If you apply the actions to your relationship experience you will likely see associations that fit. The photos are unconscious photos {as well as the literal conscious experiences}. There are likely unresolved issues to do with the relationship or its affect on you that need further examination. That's what dreams attempt to do, help the dreamer resolve emotional conflicts/issues. Much like the immune system for the body, the dream is nature's device to provide a healthy psyche.

But there is likely a third application, one to do with the inner world that makes up your personality and emotional self in the present. Any inner turmoil related to your total psychology is being addressed as well. depending on what conflicts there are to do with your early life and how that affects who you are in the present, the dreams are attempting to help those issues as well. Similarities in the relationship you had with the friend and early life experiences/influences could be in play. If you look back to your childhood and parental/other relationships you may see associations in the dream symbols. Touring a concentration camp and being in tears may be addressing an experience from early life that was a profound emotional event. If the parental relationship was not as strong as it should have been it could be addressing those issues. Whatever emotional issues you have in your life, whether it be from yesterday, a year ago or from early life, the dream would be attempting all issues. Such is the power of dreams.
Jerry

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Jerry,

No reason to apologize, it is all alright. I hope it was nothing serious with your computer and it is all back in running order. It’s amazing how much we rely on these things these days, and when they don’t work it’s like life stops almost. I say that as I am sitting here at work with 6 windows open trying to coordinate calendars and do work at the same time.
Okay I understand, I think anyway, so tell me if I am grasping the concept right. Travelling around the relationship to see the history of it, which means I was going back to see what we had relationship wise and remembering it, maybe shooting means that I was trying to freeze part of it for memories? We had a very close friendship in person, spoke daily, same birthday, same music, cars, even to a point clothing which was WEIRD, and then you add in the hobbies, photography, tattoos, we are both vets, the list goes on. Everything was so familiar to me, it was fun. And then it was gone just like that. No explanation, he said he was not ready to give one the very last time we spoke and that he would call. Well he never did, I guess that leads to what kind of person he really was/is, I have no idea. But I know it’s all unresolved in my head, and I know I can only control my thoughts and my actions, not his, so it may not be resolved, ever because he doesn’t want to talk about it.
There is a lot going on in the present and some unresolved points from the past as well, even childhood that I am just now figuring out and identifying. Last year my relationship with a man I had been with for 22yrs fell apart, I see now that it wasn’t healthy for a long time, much longer than what I thought. I am still battling the demons from this, as he is doing things that just are not good and healthy. All things I can’t control to a point, because it is what he feels he needs to do. Then I lost my friendship with my 2 good friends (one is in the dreams) the other is just well, I tried to mend things and she didn’t want anything to do with it. And my past, well my childhood was as good as what my parents thought they could give me, yes there were ups and downs and as an adult I see them clearly, as a I child I did not. When things went to the way side last year I ended up back at my parents, and it felt like I was 15 again living at home with them telling me how to live my life, that I couldn’t do this or that and there was no leeway with it. There still isn’t and I am much older now, you can’t live in the apartment, so I have been living out of a room, not healthy to say the least. But all of this is unresolved and I have tried to resolve it among other things and it just doesn’t work, my mom sees and hears and says what she wants, there is no give with her. It’s her way or no way. I know not my issue or problem, it’s how she does things, but it affects me and others, if that makes sense. Do you think that this all plays a role in those dreams too? If so, I am not sure how, maybe I am just not “seeing” it.
I haven’t had a dream with him in it since I first started to email you. Is it wrong that I miss them?

EC

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ECatherine,
I'll provide a response tomorrow to your last post. There are several issues involved in the dream as are there in your actual waking life. The relationship with your male friend is one of them but as you state there are issues from childhood as well as the 22 year relationship that fell apart. There could be issues of 'demons' why you stayed in the relationship that are related to childhood. Although the dream is using the relationship with the now past close friend, it is using that relationship not only to address the unresolved issue with it but also 'traveling around' the other issues to do with childhood and the 22 year relationship. Figuring out and identifying those issues, that is what your dreams are attempting to do. Help you identify the issues so you can understand them and resolve them.

Jerry

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ECatherine,
Again I have to apologize for not responding to your latest post on Thursday. Too many fish in the frying pan and some almost never get done.

Yes, what you state about the relationship and its history is one aspect the dream is addressing. Because it is unresolved in your head the dream is attempting to help resolve the issues related to the experiences. I dare say the circumstances which you find yourself now {living again with parents} not only is an unresolved issue but also brings back childhood issues {negative issues despite the good childhood}. You are having to relive many of those negative aspects again with your parents. Not having control over your life is itself an issue. And your dreams are attempting to help resolve them all, often many issues within one dream using the same images/symbols. Amazing how dreams are able to do that.

Remedy? Not knowing your total life circumstances that is hard to say. One step at a time, change what you can and work on those that will take more time. One thing that is most important is to find something to take your mind off the pressures in life, even if it can be a little time each day. Creativity is where you may want to look. Or, if nothing else, something you like {music for instance} and take time each day to involve yourself with that. If you do have a great interest in some creative endeavor get involved with that. Not only will that take your mind off the pressures but you put yourself on a higher plane, one that the 'true' self provides when being involved with the 'metaphysical' {metaphysical in we naturally possess senses and abilities but have lost touch with him since we no longer need them for survival}. Write down goals you need to reach to get to a better position and life and work toward those. The hero/heroine in one who works toward the goals that better one's life.

Jerry

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Jerry,
Please no need for apologies. If you had replied yesterday chances are I wouldn’t have gotten to it until anyway.
Living where I am now is bringing up a lot of old things from my childhood (I’m moving next weekend though into my own place) I know it’s not going to resolve a lot of things from childhood but it will help I think. I have tried to talk to my mom about a lot of it, but either she doesn’t want to listen or whatever because it never works. I have to live with the thought that things may never be the same or even get back to what we had with my friend, so that to me tells me that I will have these dreams forever because they will never be resolved. I haven’t had a dream since I started this thread, or maybe I have and I don’t remember. How do you remember your dreams?
I am a photographer outside of my day job, so creativity is my thing. It’s a huge outlet for me (that’s how I met my friend actually) Thank you for your support and what you said, I have to do that. What I have learned and what I want to work towards.
EC

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