Me my maternal grandma and my brother and i are camping. We were in the mountains and it was cold and in the snow. We are setting up camp, my hands are very cold. I decided to warm my hands up by turning on a stove. Then my grandma told me to the lock the doors. Suddenly our campsite had doors and walls, so I went through one door and started into a hallway with two doors began to lock the door. The first one locked the second one wouldn't very well and just kept opening. I thought this is pointless or silly and anyone can get in. Then I went and closed the main door and it also would not lock. We didn't want to be interrupted while we were camping. Then I remember that I was talking to my grandma she had stayed the first night with us, and I was asking her if she was going to stay the second. For some reason I was kind of hoping she'd go home to a small degree?

Next thing I remember I am driving in a car next to my brother. I an talking about my wife and I having a baby (which is not in real life but we have talked about it and it is a desire of mine and we haven't had success conceiving in the last 6 months)

I told my brother we were thinking about making him Union Carter.

Next I was in the hospital or doctors office. This was the most vivid coherent part of the dream. My wife was on a table looking very pregnant. I had just gotten back from the camping trip.
It was her due date and I looked at her. She was very nervous about the baby and it's health and I grabbed her and said with confidence and emotion it's ok now it's in God's hands no matter what happens. The nurse and the doctor are in the room. My wife asks if we should induce labor and the doctor said it was up to her. My wife said she wanted to try it and I asked the doctor if that increased risks of complication. The doctor said it did have risks, and the fact that my wife hasn't gone into labor yet was a sign something could be off (my wife is a very small and in her family they usually have kids a month early)

I turned around and my wife was standing up and I asked about the position of the baby, then I saw my wife's belly and the baby's head formed onto her stomach so I saw the shape of the head on her skin. The baby was positioned vertically. Then I looked down, I said oh never mind, the water broke. I turned to the doctor and said see the water broke. The doctor said somewhat panicked oh don't do that yet. I turned back around and my wife's white pants where yellow and red at the bottom from blood and the baby was just falling out of my wife feet first. The nurse lunged and partially grabbed the baby by it's legs and it just literally flopped out and almost hit the floor...it was kind of freaky it's head jerked back a little but then it started crying and I lunged for it too so it's head wouldn't hit. I remember thinking well that was easy and fast and that my wife must have been very loose down their.... And I thought it sounded like the baby had a healthy cry. Then I held him above the sink in my hands with the umbilical cord
attached and turned him around and
he was healthy looking and I held him. My wife stood next to me helping me hold him, I was not concerned about her having just given birth I was only looking at the baby.

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Dustin,
I'll provide an analysis of your dream Sunday. Since it is a bit long it will require some time to properly analyze, time I didn't have to day and will not have until Sunday {I'm retired but I work with the family business all day on Saturdays}.

Jerry [pray}

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Thanks, I should also point out that when I told my wife everything would be ok, I had confidence but also desire and hope and nervousness at the same time. I was anxious for the baby to be well. When I held the baby at the end I was both relived it was ok, and happy.

The part of the dream I really understand the least is the way the baby just flopped out and the imagery of my wife's yellow/blood soaked white pants and the way the baby came out feet first which I understand to be a breach birth. I kind of think I made my own interpretation of the dream generally based on what I felt it meant upon awakening, but I really wanted to hear your thoughts first. I found your interpretation of my other dream very helpful a while back and have been waiting for another dream that had the same depth.

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Hey, I have to add one more dream here. My dreams are getting very disturbing to me. I'm very depressed the last day or two and my dreams are very vivid...more than I ever remember then being night after night the last week or two. Tonight's really freaked me out. I don't really know who to talk to.

In my dream I had won some money or someone close to me had won some money. I went to a house and my 3 younger brothers were there sitting on a couch. I am the oldest in my family. A guy grabbed me and was holding me against my will. I tried to fight this man off but failed,I fell on the floor. He wanted this significant sum of money but I knew nothing regarding it only that it existed. I think in the dream my husband had it or a male figure did but that's weird cause I'm straight and married..... At first I felt like protecting the money but that changed very fast. He went and grabbed a knife and pulled my shirt up and cut me right across my stomach. I began to bleed quickly. I began pleading with this man to cauterize the wound. He demanded to know where the money is. I told him I don't know but I would try to do anything to help him find it and give it to him no problems just need tutu figure it out. I was bleeding more and more and my brothers just sat on the couch watching tv or playing a video game expressionless.

I kept talking to the man, and he began making some food. I began panicking. I was pleading with him offering him anything and everything. I began saying please God please. I tried to get up and walk towards him, but got light headed and had to sit down he came out of the kitchen and asked who are you pleading
With? I said God. Then i said you...you are God right now...please stop the bleeding or I'm going to die.

I was losing strength. I grabbed my shirt and began applying pressure to my wound. I looked at my brothers and asked for help but they would not and even questioned my method of applying pressure. I tried to move in ways to stop the bleeding. I told my brothers to tell mom I love a her. They seemed to hardly care. I got very faint and woke up.

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Dustin,
I have been working on your dream off and on today and have just about finished my analysis. But I would like to examine your previous dream post before giving my final analysis. This has been a tough dream to decode partially because there seems to be recent experiences involved that highlite personality traits. Th personality traits tend to come through {dreams are a general outline of emotional energies and seldom provide info on recent experiences}. If you would provide what dream you posted previously I will promptly provide a final analysis.

Jerry

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My last dream was the one entitled odd dream by Dusty on May 28

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Dustin,
Thanks. I couldn't access the old dream since it was under the name Dusty instead of Dustin.

Taking a quick look at the Odd Dream post I can see the same issues as in this dream. But I do sense progress in this one. I'll provide a complete analysis tomorrow.

Jerry

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Dustin,
Here is the analysis of the original dream you posted {I will look at the other dream later}. It is more a summary of the dream by paragraph rather than breaking down the dream by individual images/symbols {although I did break down the images...explaining each requires a lot of space and time}. I see pretty much a set pattern in this dream as the Odd Dreamexpress and be your true self, overcoming among other things emotional energies from early life that have prohibited you from doing so, aspect of your personality that lend to holding things in and not make waves. There are personal experiences, and likely experiences just prior to the dream, where there is a new development to this personality attitude. I do sense from the dream that the underlying energies still exert great influence but there is a move to overcome that {possibly evident from a recent experience}.

Here is how I read the dream pretty much by the paragraphs. I am reading the dream as it develops and not actually interpreting how it fits in your life. Hopefully you should be able to do that if my analysis hits home.

1> An inability/obstacles to open up and be your true self. Deciding whether to be more open about your feelings or keep them to yourself. There are risks in letting your feelings known. This is a part of your general personality, keeping your true feelings locked away. This is partly due to not wanting to make waves despite your true feelings. Your first inclination is to let your feelings be known but in the end you do not.

2> Sharing similar experiences/same direction as your brother. Unresolved issues about being powerless to change.

3> I couldn't really decode the sentence about making your brother the Union Carter because I do not {nor could find by Googling it} what a Union Carter is. But because you and your brother are have shared experiences whatever it does mean probably applies to do in some manner also.

4> Healing your emotional self. There may be mother issues involved, perhaps she sharing the same issues as you in expressing herself. Issues to being open to your true feelings. But there is a new confidence in yourself and being your true self. Need for healing between various aspects of family as well as whole self. A recent experience where there were elements where you did expressed your true feelings {if not wholly then partially}. But the mental attitude persists and the fear expressing your true self would complicate things.

4> Final paragraph.
Better judgement {conscious wise} is asserting itself at this point in time despite the repressed feelings that are ready to surface. This mental attitude of holding it in because of it being better not to speak up was developed in early life. To overcome this you must develop a new attitude where you must take a stand and so that the unconscious energies are overcome. A new attitude seems to be evident in recent times {recent experiences} but there is still hesitance.

Lesser self taking a stand despite the position/personal aspect of the inability to express/be your true self. The unconscious energies reign and even with a conscious desire for healing there is hesitance and you not quite prepared to express your true emotions {this would point to a recent experience}. There is just so much emotional energies involved there is still need to nurse this developing new attitude in order for the true self to take a stand.

An experience where you realize expressing your true self was not as hard as you feared. It shows a healthy response and although there is this new attitude major issues still remain. But it is significant you have finally began to develop a new attitude. That is what you are looking to and need to develop.

As for your question about the baby just flopping out feet first, I sense that to be pointing to a recent experience {one that lends itself to resolving the inner negative attitudes} where you 'took a stand' and expressed your true self {a new development} and the results weren't as negative as you feared they would be. Or you finally took a step in that direction and things turned out better than you feared {coming out and landing on its feet}. The wife's yellow/blood soaked white pants would point to the strong emotional energies involved and your normal attitude {one that must change} of wearing those emotions {pants}. Not questioning your true self but letting that self come out and stand on its own.

Summary
As in the Odd Dream post I sense issues of being your true self. Not just as a matter of your place in life in the way of 'meaning and path' but also on a personal end where you have a developed attitude of not speaking up/expressing yourself when you feel you should. There is a tendency to hold in your emotions or/and not say anything because of a fear it will cause even more issues/problems. This attitude/personality trait would be due to childhood, experiences and influences that helped form your personality. There are always foundations and I sense this inability to express/be your true self is a prime message of the dreams. From the Odd Dream whatever this aspect of truth is involves 'having to develop a new attitude' {the baby in this dream} so you can/will exert your true feelings/be who you new to be, who you really are. Although i don't often address personal aspects a dream may be focusing {only you can know those} I do sense strong vibes there was an experience{s} prior to this dream that demonstrated the development of a new attitude. Something occurred where you took a step in the right direction but did not completely 'cross over' and be that true self you wish/need to be. Family members/considerations are involved.

Let me know your response to the above. That may provide more clues to the dream message so you will be able to identify what exactly the emotional issues are the dream is attempting to communicate.

Jerry

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In the dream we were thinking about naming the child Union Carter. If it helps I have been married 4 years and it has been very difficult. Especially lately I say nothing because saying anything leads to fights, so I just stay quiet a lot when I feel like arguing.

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Dustin,
The issue with your wife where you stay quiet was the strong vibes I got from the dream, the recent personal experiences I noted. I don't often address recent experiences because only the dreamer can know those even though all dreams address both recent experiences where there are emotional energies as well as the deeper aspects related to causation/foundations to personality. I strongly sensed from this dream recent experiences related to personality. Your response verified what those were.

As for the deeper aspects. Is it in your nature to hold back from commenting or voicing your opinion, expressing what/how you really feel? That would be a part of your personality that had its basic foundations early in childhood. Also, was there similar experiences between your parents where one parent held off from commenting as you did with your wife? That also may go to the foundations to your personality.

Jerry

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When I was growing up I think I was actually more opinionated and expressive than I am now.

In the past I used to open up my too much to strangers. Over time I found that this mostly led to unwanted experiences and reactions.

In the last two years I have struggled mightily because I have come to develop a world view through my experiences that is very religious and in many ways taboo compared to the understanding of the people around me. In my religion there is a hierarchy that cannot be violated. I have little to no voice in what is taught or what is focused on. While most of what is taught lines up with my views, there are a few things that no longer sit quite right, and I am not the type to just blindly accept everything I am taught because I'm supposed to place my trust in some hierarchy.

making sense of this new viewpoint has been incredibly difficult because central to my core beliefs is sharing my religion, and that hasn't changed but my idea of what is the accurate teachings in my religion has changed so that it in many ways go against the norm. I cannot express this view point to anyone because doing so creates very intense contention and debate and also threatens my ability to stay in good standing with my faith.

Even though I have this knowledge, or beliefs, I have felt to keep it to myself which goes against my nature of talking to people in order to receive support and validation, so I feel very alone, yet feel it is important for me to stay put even though it is hard for me to feel so alone. I can't even talk to my wife about it. There is no one that I know that I can even talk to this stuff about because it's very unique to my religion and circumstance.

On the other hand my relationship with my wife has been very tumultuous and contentious swinging from great highs to extreme lows. During the times of extreme lows I feel very distraught and wish for death.

My wife and I have been married over 4 years and I had hoped to have kids by now but I have been afraid to because of the instability and also having come from a broken home where both my parents were divorced twice,I wish to avoid that happening once I have kids.

But I am fiercely loyal and apparently willing to suffer extreme degrees of emotional suffering before abandoning a relationship that is often toxic to me. I tend to focus on the good rather than bad and forgive the same behaviors over and over because I see my own weaknesses and contributions to the problems and am therefore unwilling to give up.

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Ok so something is changing. Last night's dream was completely different. I had the dream twice, first I was young, about 14 and watching a video of my 6 or 7 year old self performing in some sort of play. I was with friends and a cousin I used to be close too and they were watching it with me.

Then I had the same dream with the same video in the same room, only now I was older and with my wife, and showing her the video.

The video was me as a really cute kid but I was commenting on how I must have been autistic or add when watching myself because of how fidgety and weird I was acting. In the video I was acting in some kind of movie with lines and people directing me how to act and the video was of this process.

I don't need lengthy interpretation, but I feel like I am progressing somehow.

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Dustin,
In this post you answered my question about a spiritual search, one that was not revealed in previous responses. I sensed a strong spiritual connection but because there were not any responses addressing that, I did not continue with the question. Undoubtedly your religious associations are an important aspect of discovering and becoming your true self.

One very important aspect to being your true self is the religious experiences you were brought up with where you have no voice. Strict hierarchy is usually related to sects where a few people have control over many other people. Being led blindly goes against the natural fabric of our being. Psychologically so many people are damaged and only look outside themselves for answers instead of examining their own psychology {going inward}. I had an awaking and began to question my Church of Christ/Southern Baptist roots when I was 17. I was 42 when I began to discover the true spiritual self {when I discovered Jungian psyche and studied all the world religions}. I no longer am led, I am led by my inner self/natural instincts and my true self is a part of nature and natural law {Karma, cause and effect}. Jesus is the example to live by but the stories preached by the church are myths {exaggerated truths}. Its not what you believe/your faith that matters but your actions that dictate how life evolves. When you discover and become your true self you do not need a religion to follow, you naturally follow your soul {and do as Jesus/Buddha would do}. Place trust in your higher Self and life reveals new horizons not available to those who seek answers {and meaning} from the outer world. What you need to do is take those aspects of your religious beliefs you feel fit with your core being and reconcile them with the natural truths that govern all life. religion and nature are not separate, the true spiritual self is a part of nature. Your core being, your true self is what you witness in your dreams every night.

Note: As a science {psychology} Jung was often criticized for his concept that we all do have a natural spiritual aspect. It is a part of the true self we are born with, just as is the shadow and masculine/feminine aspects. The creative aspect {also a concept Jung believes we all possess} is a part of the spiritual because in expressing our creative self we are sharing from the soul.

Then of course there are the issues with your wife. I assume the two of you are of the same religious beliefs. That could have a bearing on the relationship since you are struggling with the faith and discovering your true spiritual identity. Beyond that the issue of having children could be apart of the message in the dream Baby dream {again that being a personal issue and one that would be difficult to discern without having more knowledge of your personal life}. All dreams have at least two applications and while I can define the general outline of a dream the personal experiences are not usually readily evident. The deeper aspects is what I normally sense and although those fit in your life {your response verifying my analysis to the Baby dream}. The personal concerns about having children due to the problems with your marriage {a legitimate one} would be another aspect the dream is addressing. The position of the baby, the position related to the issues with your marriage, would reflect your concerns of having children {dreams reflect your true self, your true emotions}. If we take the last paragraph of the dream {to do with your wife having the baby} and break it down symbolically we would find literal associations to your concerns about having children}. The yellow color of your wife's pants {pants representing you are questioning your role in some situation} would suggest something not clear {white} and the red color would represent emotional energies. The baby falling out feet first may suggest your desire for a firm grounding you wish for your children to be born with {which is not the case with the issues in your marriage}. I could break all the images down and find associations to do with having children and possibly to do with your marriage. The dream is addressing both the personal issues to do with having children and your marriage as well as the deeper issues I outlined in my analysis. This is the norm for all dreams {one Jung specified and one I see and apply in my dream work}.

In my analysis of the Baby dream, in the first part of the analysis I sensed a personal aspect of 'keeping your true feelings locked away'. That could fit with your most recent response where you state, "I am fiercely loyal and apparently willing to suffer extreme degrees of emotional suffering before abandoning a relationship that is often toxic to me". Just as with the religious aspects you tend to hold things in instead of voicing your true feelings. This goes against the grain in many ways and is opposite what you should do in many of the experiences in your current life. I can emphasis with the feeling of having ideas but with no one who is like minded to share them with {I am in that position in my belief all dreams can be successfully analyzed/interpreted where in general the world believes dreams are still unknown and a mystery}. You can not abandoned your true self because if you do life will never reach the higher plateau you seek and should reach. There will always be an imbalance, something hiding in the dark that shadows you and seeks expression. A quote from Jung: "Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate." You have to discover your true self and be that person if you are to live a balanced and harmonious life. In the end everything is psychological.

Jerry

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Dustin,
The ages 14 and 6/7 would have associations, perhaps related experiences years apart. Or something about the age 14 brought back past experiences from earlier years. The video is of the unconscious you and performing in a play represents your 'act' in life, the various aspects of your personality and ego. The dream is a 'video play' of your past life experiences. The friends would represent aspects of your whole self. The cousin could point to aspects about that relationship, something you had in common with your cousin, or aspects you held 'close to you' but no longer exists. That would go back to the video where something was ended and you are unconsciously watching that.

The later viewing would represent again viewing those past experiences. Being with your wife would suggest shared experiences, likely having associations to those past experiences. It may have associations to experiences to do with your mother. Are their shared experiences from childhood to do with her that fit with your relationship with your wife? You tend to hold in your emotions. Did you mother do the same in her relationship with your dad?

As to the part about being autistic. That condition has to do with communication, a mental condition, present from early childhood, characterized by difficulty in communicating. That fits with your holding in your true emotions. What was experienced in childhood at age 6/7 had associations to age 14 and again as an adult {with associations to a wife}. The directing how to act may point to the religious indoctrination as well as other aspects n childhood. Childhood experiences/influences are the foundations for personality and actions in later life. It is the process of who you become because of the childhood experiences/influences.

I can see progress in the dream because you may getting to the core of the emotional conflicts your dreams are attempting to communicate. Dreams tend to have a process of their won where the next dreams offers something new. I had worked with a dreamer who had posted several dreams over a period of time with the last dream and analysis revealing {and her recognizing the associations to her life } what was being repressed. We knew there was something but it took time to finally put it together. Dreams are like the old series of movies or TV soap operas where each episode offers something new toward an end to the story. This is a series of dreams with each new dream offering new evidence to what the underlying issues are as well as what caused them.

Jerry

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