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Pub - Cats

I'm posting 2 dreams which I had over 2 nights, since I think they may be relevant to one another. I hope that's ok.

DREAM 1
I need to go back to the public house where I lived as a child, I'm aware that there's something there which I need to sort out.

I'm standing naked in front of the pub's front door, looking up at the first floor windows. I've been knocking, trying to get the attention of the occupants. The door is in the centre and has a window either side on the ground floor and a window either side on the first floor. I have two people with me. My step-father is on my right, knocking on the right window and another person is on my left knocking on the left window.
I'm not very embarrassed about being naked, but it occurred to me that now I'd rather not be. I say to my step-father "Tell them to throw my dressing gown down, too. It's hanging on the back of my bedroom door".

Next, I'm inside, exploring the rooms on the first floor (the apartment above the pub). I feel that I'm the owner and this is my business. Two single mothers (younger than me) are now living there with their children. Woman 1 is accompanying me as I walk around. I notice her hair has been dyed and the roots are showing. Woman 2 occupies the first bedroom we pass, I glance in and see it's a little messy. I walk through the hallway, which also serves as an office. Woman 2 is sat in the hallway, busy with something in her hands. She looks up and gives me a shy smile as I pass her. There's paperwork strewn about the desk and on the floor, along with various other items (shoes, coats, toys, etc.) that have been left out of place.

Next I walk into the childrens room. It contains 5 bunk beds, two on the left wall, two on the right and one across the far wall, which meets the bunks on either side. A couple of the beds are made and the others unmade, the covers still thrown back from when the children got up. I notice the colour pink is quite prominent.

Lastly, I walk into my old bedroom, which is now occupied by woman 1 who is with me. She sits on the bed and looks around the room, then says "Sorry about the mess, this is kind of embarrassing" then, as if to try and explain "but, we've not seen you for 23 years".
My dressing gown is still hanging on the back of door where I left it. It's pink, but discolored and fading/yellowing in places, from age.**

Associations: I did live in this pub as a child, we left there 24 1/2 years ago, just before I turned 10 years old. The outside of the pub was the same in real life as in the dream. The inside was mostly different and smaller, but with some similarities, such as the desk being in the hallway.

My step-father may partly represent my ego's 'right-hand-man' (aux function), this often seems to be a strong possibility in my dreams.

I've tried thinking about events that occurred around this time period. There were many which were unsettling and I'm not sure how to narrow it down.

DREAM 2
I'm looking through the window onto my back garden. I see four adult cats bullying a kitten. The kitten is trying to escape or desperately trying to defend itself. The adults are different sizes and colours. The smallest adult is an average size, the largest is abnormally large. I watch them surround the kitten, then close in and start devouring it.

I call my partner in from the other room. I want him to go out and save the kitten. He watches through the window for a moment and I get angry at him for not going outside fast enough. Annoyed, I storm passed him and run outside myself. I'm feeling a little afraid as I approach the cats. I'm afraid of them for some reason, but also I'm afraid of hurting them. I want them to run when they see me, but they don't. They just continue devouring the kitten, like I'm not even there. I'm angry, I want to kick them all away from the kitten, but at the same time I still don't want to hurt them. As I reach them, I manage to keep my temper under control. I compromise between my conflicting feelings. I'm going to push them aside first, if they resist I will then use more force and hurt them if necessary. As I lean in to move them away, they retreat one by one. I brace myself for the moment that I see the kitten. I expect it to be in a terrible state, but all I see is a patch of dirt. I realize that I'm too late, the little kitten has gone. The cats are casually walking away, occasionally stopping to lick their paws clean. They're acting as though nothing has happened. I look back at the dirt and I remember the kitten's frightened look, trying desperately to defend itself when it didn't have a chance. I feel overwhelmed with guilt. I should have moved sooner and faster.

I'm back inside looking out through the window again. Two kittens come into view, playing together. I can see the adult cats in the neighbours garden, now there's several more of them. They're beginning to look alert and pay attention and I start to feel panicky (like when something bad is about to happen and I'm unable to stop it). I'm concerned that these kittens are going to suffer the same fate as the first kitten. I go outside and pick them up, looking for a safe place to put them. Nowhere looks safe, they're completely vulnerable.

There's a low shed roof and there are fence panels on top of it. The panels are laid flat and stacked up on top of each other. I put the kittens into a gap between two panels. I know it's still not very safe. I feel like I'm simply postponing the inevitable, it will only be a matter of time. I know I can't protect them and I feel helpless and frustrated.

Next, I'm in the back of a car with my partner, a woman is driving him to the hospital. I feel like she's his therapist or something. I'm still a little angry at him for not saving the kitten. I say I will wait in the car while they both go inside. Now I'm alone in the car. I go into my partners bag, hoping to find something to pass the time. I find some letters which he's shown to me before and decide to reread them. The car starts up by itself and drives erratically for a short distance. I think I'm going to crash into a wall, but the car stops just in time. **

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Re: Pub - Cats

Nicola,
I'll take a look at your dream on Thursday. Lost a feral cat {one of my community} last night and need a day to grieve.

Jerry

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Re: Pub - Cats



Sure, no problem, Jerry. Sorry to hear about that. Take all the time you need.

Nicola

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Re: Pub - Cats

Nicola,
Sorry to take longer to analyze your dream than promised. Other responsibilities took me away from my dream work yesterday before I could finish interpreting the images/actions in your dream. It takes a couple of hours minimum to do that as well as evaluate the actions and put them into context where it all fits together. I've finished the first dream and will work on the second today.

What I get from he first dream is there are issues from early life, if not at age 10 then the years while you lived at the pub, that have affected you personality wise, attitudes and personal traits. What stands out are issues of nurturing, something is lacking which may have left your own abilities related to nurturing in a 'mess'. There does seem to be hidden issues that could point to something repressed, an experiences or experiences more serious If so look to sexual aspects}. But those issues may merely be related to the nurturing aspects. Look specifically at the nurturing aspects during early childhood, the years at the pub that could have caused issues of personality as an adult. Self confidence may be an issue as well as other personal insecurities. Go back to your earliest memories and along with examine what may be remembered by doing that, analyze the experiences related to the memories and see where that might lead. You may have to draw some conclusions that lack evidence {forgotten/repressed} but if the possibility exists then consider those and perhaps anything forgotten/repressed will come up to memory. If it is merely a nurturing issue and not something repressed due to traumatic experiences {sexual or other abuse} then you may be able to eliminate what is and what isn't.

The second dream does seem to be more direct ion what the issues could be. The bullying may repressed repressed rage. The kitten would represent you as a child. The four adults could be addressing actual persons but could be addressing issues of parents/nurturing, your parents as well as you being a parent {experiences/influences from your childhood and your parents as a pattern in your own life as a parent}. I'll give tome to examining the dream and see where it leads.

Below is my interpretation of the images and actions from the first dream. These may help you see something related to personal experiences only you can know. I gave an interpretation to the title and you comments since these are often unconsciously motivated thoughts and relevant to the dream.



Dream Title
Pub - Cats
Your 'public' conscious self related to feminine aspects/experiences of power/possible sexuality issues

Dream
I need to go back to the public house where I lived as a child, I'm aware that there's something there which I need to sort out.

Interpretation of images/actions
-go back-going back to earlier life experiences
-public house-where you hung out, your 'public' self, personality traits/attitudes/also actual experiences while living in this pub
-as a child-pointing to actual childhood experiences or/and influences {what influenced your developing psyche as a child, experiences that had emotional energies that became embeded in your psyche}.

Summary of opening statement in dream
I have found in my dream work that a mention of any time frame or actual childhood experiences in the opening statement in a dream is addressing issues from that time period. Your dream is as direct as it can get in the opening statement. There is something in your childhood that needs to be sorted out. The public house {pub/bar} is you/house with the pub representing a need to release emotional stress or/and a need for acceptance in some aspect of your life {dating back to childhood}. Being aware may point to being aware of conscious actions but not the underlying reasons for them {the childhood experiences/influences help form personality traits and attitudes}. The emotional issues from childhood are what you need to sort out as an adult, those issues having strong energies that still affect your conscious life.
Note: One reason I ask for location of the dreamer is what means one thing in one part of the world could mean something different i another. A public house in the UK is a pub, a bar in the US {although the two terms have slightly different meanings as well}.

The opening statement is pretty much what the dream is addressing and trying to communicate to you.




Dream
I'm standing naked in front of the pub's front door, looking up at the first floor windows. I've been knocking, trying to get the attention of the occupants. The door is in the centre and has a window either side on the ground floor and a window either side on the first floor. I have two people with me. My step-father is on my right, knocking on the right window and another person is on my left knocking on the left window.

Interpretation of images/actions
-standing naked in front of the pub's front door-a need to expose/make consciously known the assertive/strong emotional issues
-looking up at first floor windows-looking at the developing/early years in your life {childhood/the first years where foundations/floor of personality development are formed}
-I've been knocking/trying to get the attention of the occupants-the dream is trying to attract your attention to some aspect of yourself {occupants}
-door is in center/windows either side of ground floor/first floor-entrance to what is 'center' of your personality/the ground for which your personality is built {ground floor}/the early years in life {first floor}
-two people with me-two is a common symbol for conflict/two people could denote actual people {parents?}/two applications the dream is attempting to address {there are always at least two meanings/applications of every dream/dream image
-step-father on right/knocking on right window-conscious reality {right} to do with issues of authority and protection with real step-father/windows are openings to unconscious contents/right usually refers to unconscious aspects that influence conscious {social} self
-another person is on left/left window-an unconscious aspect that needs to be made conscious
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dream
I'm not very embarrassed about being naked, but it occurred to me that now I'd rather not be. I say to my step-father "Tell them to throw my dressing gown down, too. It's hanging on the back of my bedroom door".

Interpretation of images/actions
-not very embarrassed about being naked-not afraid of exposing what is hidden
-occurred now I rather not be-part of your present mind set/personality
-say to step-father/throw dressing gown down, too-a need to confront personal issues
-it's hanging om back of bedroom door-residing in unconscious/aspects that are hidden
Note-To dream of your childhood bedroom could indicate a current situation or feeling that has triggered a memory from your childhood that you have kept secret. Sexual aspects may need to be considered
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dream
Next, I'm inside, exploring the rooms on the first floor (the apartment above the pub). I feel that I'm the owner and this is my business. Two single mothers (younger than me) are now living there with their children. Woman 1 is accompanying me as I walk around. I notice her hair has been dyed and the roots are showing. Woman 2 occupies the first bedroom we pass, I glance in and see it's a little messy. I walk through the hallway, which also serves as an office. Woman 2 is sat in the hallway, busy with something in her hands. She looks up and gives me a shy smile as I pass her. There's paperwork strewn about the desk and on the floor, along with various other items (shoes, coats, toys, etc.) that have been left out of place.

Interpretation of images/actions
-exploring rooms on first floor-exploring unconscious aspects related to foundations/early life
-apartment above pub-mental aspects related to pub experiences/personality
-owner/my business-personality issues you are dealing with
-two single mothers are now living there-two nurturing related aspects you are now dealing with
-woman 1 accompanying me-one feminine/nurturing aspect that has influences over you
-hair has been dyed/roots are showing-mental stains from your 'roots'/foundations
-woman 2 occupies first bedroom we pass/little messy-negative aspects that are hidden
-walk through hallway/serves as office-a transition of issues that burden you
-woman 2 sits in hallway-in a transitional phase
-busy with something in her hands-dealing with emotional issues
-looks up/shy smiles as I pass-a need to see aspects that have affected your personality
-paperwork shrewn at desk on floor-issues related to childhood you are dealing with {unconsciously}
-items out of place-aspects that are out of place/prevent wholeness
-----------------------------------------------------------
Dream
Next I walk into the children's room. It contains 5 bunk beds, two on the left wall, two on the right and one across the far wall, which meets the bunks on either side. A couple of the beds are made and the others unmade, the covers still thrown back from when the children got up. I notice the colour pink is quite prominent.

Interpretation of images/actions
-walk into children's room-unconscious aspects related to childhood/children that changed you growth wise
-contains 5 bunk beds-childhood issues that caused changes in your personality/influence your nurturing aspects
-two on right/two on left/on across from far wall-mostly balanced but with one 'prominent aspect out of place
-some made/other unmade-some issues resolved/others not
-covers still thrown back when children got up-uncovering aspects from childhood
-color pink is quite prominent-nurturing issues
-----------------------------------------------
Dream
Lastly, I walk into my old bedroom, which is now occupied by woman 1 who is with me. She sits on the bed and looks around the room, then says "Sorry about the mess, this is kind of embarrassing" then, as if to try and explain "but, we've not seen you for 23 years".
My dressing gown is still hanging on the back of door where I left it. It's pink, but discolored and fading/yellowing in places, from age.**

Interpretation of images/actions
-walk into old bedroom/occupied with woman 1-issues related to nurturing from early life
-sits on bed/looks around room-unconscious focus on issues
-say, "Sorry about the mess, this is kind of embarrassing"-early influences that affect your current life related to hidden weaknesses/insecurities
-we'e not seen you in 23 years-experiences from 23 years ago {age 10}
-dressing gown is still hanging on back of door where left-issues that need to be confronted from childhood/year while living at pub
-pink but discolored-nurturing issues that are tarnished
-fading/yellow in places, from age-faded memories/anxieties related to childhood age
-----------------------------------
Associations
I did live in this pub as a child, we left there 24 1/2 years ago, just before I turned 10 years old. The outside of the pub was the same in real life as in the dream. The inside was mostly different and smaller, but with some similarities, such as the desk being in the hallway.

My step-father may partly represent my ego's 'right-hand-man' (aux function), this often seems to be a strong possibility in my dreams.

Interpretation
-dream focusing on experiences at and before age 10 {while living at pub}
-outside is same in real life-experiences have affected your real life in the present
-inside mostly different/smaller-inside you were affected/issues that made you 'smaller' than you should be {self confidence/insecurities}
-similarities such as desk in hallway-similar issues now and then that weight on you
-step-father as aux function-development of attitudes to supplement what is missing/lacking

Note: I do request a response to my analysis. My services are free and a response is the least that can be given. A contribution of any amount to my Kitty Fund would be appreciated but not required.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 65 Cocoa, Fl

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Re: Pub - Cats

Thank you, Jerry.

In regards to nurturing, that time period might indicate a lack of parental nurturing. During that time, my parents worked all hours, couldn't afford to hire any staff so I rarely spent time with them. In addition, the business was failing and therefore stress levels were very high.
This affects my current life because I've always been very wary of how much time I spend away from my own children.

I recognize how two incidents that occurred during that time altered my attitude and behaviors. These caused me to repress certain aspects of my sexuality and sexual expression which I've been working to undo the effects of.

When you mentioned vulnerabilities, I realised that the dressing gown represents a cover to conceal vulnerabilities. This also relates to the kitten since vulnerability was a significant factor in that dream.

I think the kitten might represent the early stages of something developing and it being 'devoured' by experiences. Leading me to hide or conceal those aspects whenever they appeared again because I see them as vulnerable.

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Re: Pub - Cats

Nicola,
This fits with the images/actions in the dream. Nurturing seems to be a primary issue along with the sexual repression{I am careful of naming sexual aspects since they are very personal and difficult to pin down}. I sensed one application of the 'two' women. One would be your mother and the other you in providing nurturing. Because there was a lack of nurturing in your childhood {even if not intentional but because of life's responsibilities} you have a natural inclination to follow that 'pattern't life. What is learned in childhood usually becomes the pattern in adulthood. This was what I saw in the dream.

Note: Let me mention the negative nurturing pattern {the lack of} is also counter to the 'archetypal' mother and expected nurturing we are born with. Nature provides humans {and all animals} with an expectation of nurturing, protection and security. When this absent it affects the psyche and causes conflict {emotional in humans}.

As for the sexual repression, the bed image as well as the gown would point to this. I believe this and the nurturing are the the hidden aspects that need more exploration. As long as the issues remain unresolved {not fully understood and the motivating energies ended} they will continue to have an effect on your conscious life. You are aware of the issues so what is needed is a thorough exploration of the the experiences to see and understand them. What is know as the 'inner child' remains alive and it seeks understanding, looking back at yourself as a third person by viewing yourself as a child and getting an objective sense of that time and those experiences. The inner child is archetypal and it must be reconciled with the true life of you as a child, resolving the emotional conflicts and giving closure so there can be proper personal growth. Those early life experiences are the reason you have repressed sexuality issues {as well as nurturing}. When you explore those years you will see new things come up that were forgotten {or repressed} and with that you begin to understand who you are and why you are that person. You can take back control of your life by removing the motivating energies formed in childhood.

As for the second dream I believe you are correct in the kitten as an early stage of development in one context {you are the kitten}. Later in the dream there are two kittens which would represent the two aspects that are in conflict. The four adults {4 is the number for wholeness} it could on on hand represent your father and mother and you and your partner {the partner aspect would need to be vetted to determine what extent it applies}. Your partner would likely represent your animus in one aspect {anger for not saving the kitten}, anger within yourself, at your father and possibly at your actual partner.

There is a positive aspect to the dream. The dream mentions therapist which may be pointing to a solution {since you are already aware of the issues and are consciously working on them, you as your own therapist as well as an actual therapist}. Because of these issues your life is erratic and at times feelings of a possible crash {seeing a impeding crash but stopping just in time in a dream is a common motif}. Earlier in the dream the two kittens are playing together {coming together}, the adult cats in the neighbor's garden {garden represents growth}, beginning to look alert and paying attention. because your dreams reflect your true self at the time you have the dream I sense this is pointing to your actively looking to understand the issues. Understanding/acknowledging the emotional energies is the first step to healing. There is an unconscious fear {that becomes conscious when explored} that you will be like your mother, these kittens {your emotional issues} will suffer the same fate as the first kitten {your mother}. That does beg the question about other aspects/experiences of your mother {explore those, there may be more there than realized}. Until the issues are resolved you will have the vulnerability issues.

The next to last paragraph has the fence panels. Fences can represent issues with expression {barriers and repression} as well as issues of 'privacy' {bed/bedroom}. Panels can symbolize 'a layer of insulating material should be placed between the panels and the wall' {barriers}. Because of where this is positioned in the dream suggests it is a current issue with possible recent experiences adding more to your frustrations and feelings of helplessness {as the dream stated}. Then comes the possible solution of the therapist in the last paragraphs {these fit with Jung's theory of dream structure.

This dream points to progress. Follow the direction in the last paragraph and you will find solutions to your emotional issues as well as, in time, find balance in your life, a better life because you have removed the power of the unconscious motivating energies.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 65 Cocoa, Fl

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Re: Pub - Cats

I will continue looking at the areas which you have suggested. I remember a previous dream with similar images and suggesting the same time frame http://www.powerofdreams.net/dreamforum.html#bn-forum-1-1-2863566527/48/1198805/show
Again, two mothers, a cat and associations with experiences at ages 8 - 11, including one of the incidents I mentioned.

Thank you for your time and input. At least, it seems I have a narrowed down a timeframe.

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Re: Pub - Cats

Nicola,
Look at all the early years {memories begin at age 4 or 5}. In looking at the experiences do so with an eye not just on specific events that were traumatic but the overall experience of parenting and nurturing. There may not be any one incident that needs to be remembered but instead your whole childhood experience. Look at your earliest memories and replay how those came about. They could possibly open up new memories are provide insights to possibilities of how they developed .

Example: I have one memory of my father coming home and I was afraid he would be mad at me {for a reason I do not remember}. Upon further thought I could see possible associations that had a good possibility of abusive behavior on his part although I had no memories of that}. Either way it was the overall attitude as a parent on his part {leaving his family when I was 6 and never again a part of our lives} that was the controlling agent in my psyche and motivated me in many negative experiences in my early adulthood}.

Look for specific experiences but also your overall childhood. It could be the accumulative experiences and not any traumatic experiences. Or there could have been experiences a young child should not have been exposed to without being an abusive one. Your life in a pub could have exposed you to negative experiences.

Jerry [pray}

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Re: Pub - Cats

Yes, I have a similar memory from 3 years old where I wanted to ask my mother a question and was very apprehensive about asking, afraid she would get angry. I also know that she had premenstrual dysphoric disorder up until she had a hysterectomy a few days before my 12th birthday. My father once told my partner that my mother was "absolutely wonderful for 2 weeks and then she was an absolute b***h for 2 weeks". This would definitely fit in with the 'two mothers' associations and also the time frame. I will consider this further and look at any effects/correlations in my own life now.

Thank you. I believe we may really be onto something now :)

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Re: Pub - Cats

Nicola,
Memories before the age of 4 are unusual but if the energies for the memory are so strong there could be a impression left from them. Young children not only have memories from experiences but from impressions as well. You may not have known why your mother would have been angry but the fact she was and because it was so unusual and had a force beyond the norm it could have left an imprinted memory even at age 3. Also the issue of 2 week on and 2 weeks off could be a reason for the number 4 in the dream {2+2}. What your young psyche would be expecting would be a 'balanced' environment from the mother. Her temperament would have been something a young child would pick up on and because the psyche is prone to use 'universal/archetypal' images {and numbers} at that age {you are closer to birth and that natural environment than one where personality is in charge} it would be something your dreams would use to communicate the natural expectation of 'balance' as a part of life. An intention of dreams is to help restore balance to what is out of balance which would include early impressions/experiences and influences that formed your psyche/personality and personal traits.

Jerry

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