Hello Jerry,

I thought a lot about experience with my father. I realized that when I was a girl my father made laugh of me. He laughed at me because I was slow in thinking and he pointed out that I am not always in reality, because as a child I wasn't very interested in reality, more in thoughts and talking with people. Also he wanted me to look better, not to stoop and don't have my hands in pockets. Lots of people made fun of my appearance then, most of them were men - my cousins. I think that my father didn't believe in me much and comparing to my twin sister my appearance and behaviour(not being real women who takes care about appearance and wants to look nice for men) was not acceptable for him.

This year I will have 10 wedding anniversary with my husband. I chose him because he valued in me that part which my father didn't like. For all these years I had a problem with another men occurring in my life. At work I met few men towards them I had huge sexual emotions. When I left one company and started working for another there also another men occurred. I think they may be somehow similar to my father not being nice to me and commenting my behaviour or talk in negative way. My first experience with such a men was that that emotions were overwhelming and I wasn't able to talk with him or be around him because of huge emotions and at the same time thought that I don't want to sleep with him because of my husband.Then I left company and at my current work I met another men. I know he liked me and was attracted to me and giving lots of comments and emotions towards me. I worked on relationship and make it more sister brother like. And now I am able to defend myself and argue with him if I have another opinion. He is leaving company and I have changed team and another men occurred. Also many emotions around but I know I love my husband and my child very much and don't want to be overwhelmed by emotions. This men was also not nice to me and in exchange I was nice to him. He stated sth which told me that he is attracted to me and I hate that part. I hate being perceived by men as an object of desire and it is happening very often in my life. I feel like being offended that way.

Now relationship with my husband is great, I realized how much I love him. Previously I was haunted by desires and not always loving him.

By stating :' because of the relationship, or he provides you the opportunity to release negative emotions by being someone you can project onto the negative experiences from childhood'. What do you mean by stating that he is someone I can project onto the negative experience.Do you indicate that he is victim?

I will comment your interpretation:

Waterfalls
-releasing negative emotions--> right now I am working as analyst in team of 13 men, I am the only women there, maybe it is opportunity for me to release emotions now

-dropping two stones into lake-letting go of internal/external guilt that affects your emotional state of mind--> not sure what guilt it may be, maybe the fact that I am not a real women(the way my father wanted me to be)
-later spotted water of lakes are deep-emotional state of mind is related to personality traits/attitudes--> not sure what this may mean
-went on a road alone-feeling alone in your journey-->previously I felt alone in my marriage because I wasn't open to my husband
-road started down with lot of curves-life starting in wrong direction with a lot of emotional twists--> probably being close to my husband, and having depression thoughts
-in front I/prevent from going down the road-consciously trying not to let negative emotions control you--> yeah it matches my attitude toward men which I controlled in order not hurt my husband
-afraid to to go to him because of vipers-feelings of self doubt/lack of control because of hidden fears--> lack of control of sexual tension
-I was in mountains with friend and his family-possessing major emotional obstacles/rejected masculine related aspects--> in what way I reject masculine aspects? In my marriage I am more men then my husband, our friend comment it that way
-spotted beautiful green grass/sun shining-able to see personal growth/positive future--> I started finding lots of happiness in my family
-view beautiful and overwhelming-positive but immense emotions--> now I have lots of love for people sometimes afraid that too much
-looked at friend/he didn't look at me/only his family-rejected masculine aspects that affect your whole self--> not sure what I rejected?

And to answer your question I did experience depression.

Thank you very much for your interpretation.It makes sense and means lots of to me. also sorry for not responding to my last eclipse dream, i think that time i wasn't able too see my father in negative way.

Lots of smiles and hugs for You!

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 33 female

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