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Dreams after Healing and Recovery

Hello Jerry,

Let me begin by saying I am so grateful that I have found this informative website, looking forward to learn from what you'll share on here and it’s a real joy to go through these posts and see mutual dreams symbols and their interpretation they make so much sense to my young-self dreams.

A little info:

I am really concerned about these two dreams of my ex, because I have grown up from being a very needy and weak woman into a woman who knows herself and accept both her masculine and feminine sides, my ex was too masculine which you know results aggression and control, I was too feminine and too forgiven and quiet about his mental and behavioral patterns. But not anymore because lately I have been through an inner journey and healing so I decided to end it all in December and someone last month told me he wants me back in his life again, I am really confused and upset at these dreams of him, does it mean that I am still carrying him within me without me being aware of it? Does it mean there are more healing I need to go through?

The first dream:

My boyfriend has a daughter that he hides as a secret without telling me, I was so shocked! And went speaking in a high angry tone "why he did not tell me that he has a daughter?! "

The second dream:

I called my ex on the mobile, he answered while pretending that he is talking to someone else I think it's a girl, while he was aware of me speaking to him, I got very insulted at this indecent manner and hang up then he called back immediately telling me while he is playing baseball "your letter has changed my life!" Then he shot in the basket when he finished his sentence, I was so upset and shocked in the dream saying with wide eyes to myself " how come he is talking to me while playing baseball? indecent and disrespectful"

as you can see both dreams are sharing mutual recurring feelings, which are shock and upset at such indecent manners.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 25/Female

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} No

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Re: Dreams after Healing and Recovery

Rena,
I am working on your dream but it may be Thursday before I can give a final analysis. I have obligations tomorrow which may not allow me to put the mental energies required to provide a proper analysis. Short dreams can be tough to interpret and a thorough examination of the possibilities is needed. I do sense associations to childhood {the daughter being you}. As for continue healing the dream does point to that. Resolving emotional issues take a very long time especially when childhood issues are involved. Strong emotional experiences during childhood are imprinted on the psyche and are hard to resolve. And what is learned from childhood often becomes the blueprint for actions as an adult. Both dreams are addressing these issues as well as current experiences related to the same issues.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 Cocoa, Fl

Re: Dreams after Healing and Recovery

Rena,
Here is my interpretation of the images and actions from your dream. I'll provide further comments later, after you have read this post and hopefully provide a response. But basically I see it as dealing with your desire in seeking to balance the masculine/feminine aspects. You have made progress but work still needs to be done. Much of it may be related to early life experiences {or lack of} in developing proper masculine aspects {not having a father to provide guidance}. There are personal aspects to the dream that would require more personal info about your relationship with your father. That may have hampered personal growth related to masculine aspects which could be a hindrance in bringing balance to your psyche.

Dream 1
My boyfriend has a daughter that he hides as a secret without telling me, I was so shocked! And went speaking in a high angry tone "why he did not tell me that he has a daughter?! "

-my boyfriend has a daughter-masculine aspects/inner aspects related to developing feminine aspects/early life associations
-hides as a secret without telling-hidden aspects aspects that need to brought/is being brought to conscious knowledge
-was shocked-causing emotional disturbance
-speaking in a high angry tone-elevated emotions due to frustrations with self
-why he did not tell me he has daughter-need to understand inner masculine aspects that are preventing personal development

Summary
I sense the dream is addressing inner masculine aspects that still need to be developed. You are working on such issues and may believe you have solved much of the problems but there is still work to be done. The early life associations as a daughter would be relevant also. Not having had a proper relationship with your father {prior to reconciliation} would have harmed the growth of your inner masculine self. That could be the 'secret' you are not fully aware of which in later life has caused frustrations and led to choosing an psychological abusive relationship {in your ex-bf} compensating/mirroring how your mother treated you as a daughter

Dream 2
I called my ex on the mobile, he answered while pretending that he is talking to someone else I think it's a girl, while he was aware of me speaking to him, I got very insulted at this indecent manner and hang up then he called back immediately telling me while he is playing baskeball "your letter has changed my life!" Then he shot in the basket when he finished his sentence, I was so upset and shocked in the dream saying with wide eyes to myself " how come he is talking to me while playing basketball? indecent and disrespectful"

-called ex on the mobile-communication with masculine aspects
-he answered while pretending he was talking to someone else/a girl-deception in association with inner masculine aspects
-while he was aware of me speaking to him-communication with inner masculine self
-got very insulted at indecent manner-self esteem issues due to improper experiences
-then he called back-recurrence of past experiences
-playing basketball-working in making progress to bring balance in life {basketballs are round, a circle which symbolizes wholeness}
-"your letter has changed my life"-inner guidance making changes
-he shot the basket when finished his sentence-holding onto masculine beliefs even after making judgement about these aspects
-I was upset/wide eyes to myself-emotional distress in seeing waking actions
-"how come he is talking to me while playing basketball"-questioning masculine aspects in making progress to bring about balance

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 Cocoa, Fl

Re: Dreams after Healing and Recovery

Hello Jerry

Thank you for interpreting my dreams.
My thoughts on the two dreams and the interpretations are:
I thought that dreaming of certain people is always related to them and of the fate of the relationship. I didn't expect that It would be related to my past issues or hidden forces within myself. I agree with some psychoanalytical points that you have highlighted but I also believe that what happened in the past could be healed. Also the past led to see other positive aspects within myself too that I both have and developed within myself.
also I thought that the first dream was relating to something the guy was hiding, maybe an undeveloped feminine aspect within him that took the symbol of a daughter. ( he is acting like a little girl )

the second dream :
I thought that he was in fact going to call me in real life. also I thought that he was actually working within himself to change into the better. but the interpretation was different.

Thank you.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 25

Re: Dreams after Healing and Recovery

Rena,
To your thoughts: "dreaming of certain people is always related to them and of the fate of the relationship." It is related in some form to them but it is in relationship to your emotions. He is the masculine aspect I pointed to and his inclusion in the dream is due to the emotional energies within you to do with that he effectuates. But this is but one layer of the dream, the personal layer that I can only discern with having more personal info about you {I have only your age and gender, nothing personal}.

The other layer, the one I can discern from the dream images and actions, goes to the behavioral and developed attitudes that are the foundations for your personality/psyche. We all have both masculine and feminine aspects and your bf is your inner 'masculine', your animus. Your actual bf may stimulate inner masculine energies and the dream uses him to address those energies. If the 'literal' representation isn't real {did he hide a daughter from you?} then the dream message is 'more' about your inner masculine, something that is 'hidden' within your unconscious about your masculine aspects that needs to be brought out. Your inner masculine is 'out-of-balance'. This could be due to not having a proper relationship with your father {thus be deprived of the needed masculine guidance} and/or an improper relationship with a male, one that you hide from consciousness because of the emotional pain {which would fit? that is the masculine aspect that needs healing}.

'What happened in the past can be healed'. That is about dreams attempt to do, help heal emotional issues/conflicts {what is out of balance within your psyche}. Just as the body has the immune system to regulate, protect and heal the body, so to the psyche has the dream. It is nature's tool, evolutionary and developed over time.

'Also the past led to see other positive aspects within myself too'. I noted in my analysis the positive, the progress. Are you consciously working with your inner aspects, therapy or a personal search? I can read the outlines of the emotional energies but you can only name actually what the cause for the out-of-balanced' masculine aspects. Look at the reasons for why you were a needy and weak woman, go back to childhood and go forward. The experiences in early life, and later life 'traumatic' experiences {emotionally charged} are what formed your personality and personal attitudes {along with biological DNA}. hat have you done to address these issues? The dream tells me you are working to make progress but not how you are going about doing it.

What is still hidden? That is the main theme, issues related to masculine aspects that produced a needy and weak woman. The hidden daughter could very well be you as a daughter and there are 'emotional secrets' related to masculine experiences that need to be brought out, still. These issues are hindering complete wholeness, resolving the out-of-balanced' emotional issues.

'dream was relating to something the guy was hiding, maybe an undeveloped feminine aspect within him that took the symbol of a daughter'. Again, your dreams are about what is hidden within you. There is some aspect related to your actual bf that stimulates the inner bf, the inner masculine aspects, Boy is masculine, friend is a positive. This indicates there is a healing taking place {the positive aspects I noted} but there are still issues remaining {they will always be within the psyche, to what degree they affect your life is dependent on the healing process}. The 'he is acting like a little girl' tells me there are experiences in early life {you are the little girl} related to outer masculine experiences {with a male/males} that are still be 'acted out' as an adult. The second dream seems to be addressing these inner attitudes but would point to some aspect of relationships with men as an adult {your bf} that still need to be resolved {deceiving yourself}. The 'questioning' of masculine aspects I noted in my amplification at the end of the second dream probably is pointing to 'questioning' aspects to the actual relationship with your bf. The aggressive/controlling male/bf and you as the weak feminine addresses the actual relationship, but also is addressing the inner issues that come from early life experiences with males. The underlying reasons for the weak female you were and how they played into you ignoring and being too forgiving to his behavioral problems.
My sense of all of this is there is still work to be done, on the inner issues and then the outer {the outer can never be resolved as long as the inner persists}.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 Cocoa, Fl


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