Good morning, Jerry,

I would first like to thank you for such a thorough analysis. It is wonderful.

I am not sure of where to start, exactly, so I will try to start with this (I am not sure if I have mentioned this before, but if so, forgive me): A couple of years ago I graduated with a Masters Degree in Interior Design. I had been let go of my job during the recession, and had a hell of a time trying to find a job. Long story short, I was never hired anywhere (even part time would have been great - I didn’t care where). I completed my degree and didn’t get hired for a job until right after graduation, part time (finally after 3 years of being laid off – thank God for family!) at a local university. After being with the university for 3 months, I ended up getting a foot in the door type of job at an Architectural firm in North Carolina – where I had wanted to move. I got there and the job was hell – found out no one stayed in my position because of how horrible the owners were, how horrible the workload was and how horrible some of the staff was. I got paid really well, but the trade off was horrible – the hours were ridiculous, the owners unrealistic and not kind (abusive, really). The university in NY ended up hiring me back FT, so I packed up everything and came back to NY. The money is enough to get by on, but I can’t afford to live on my own (I live with my parents) and the job is lackluster.

In the meantime, I began to paint. Really paint and take classes on a regular basis which has been healing for me – a way to channel my frustrations, energies, etc.

I have just been starting to be really honest with myself and realize that I have been unhappy with the direction I have allowed my life to take these past couple of years. Fear has been the underlying factor to a lot of my actions, inactions and dissatisfaction.

When I lost my job, I was in a field I hated – maybe hate isn’t strong enough of a word lol. “Abhorred” would probably be better to describe my feelings. I fell into that career and it paid well and was familiar but I was not happy. I wanted to work creatively and be around creative minded people and thought going back to school would allow me to adjust my sails. So far, that has not been the case with interior design, BUT I do feel this affinity with painting.

With respect to work, I am finding that I am in another work environment that is filled with a variety of miserable and negative people and that was getting me down for a long, long time. Then, earlier this year, I started to really look at myself and how my life was reflecting what essentially, was going on inside of me (I feel anyways). I was 20 pounds overweight, felt crummy, felt miserable inside and I just got sick of it. I started to do some inner work and some outer work as well (took me long enough). In March I began what I now call a “lifestyle change”. I began exercising and eating clean, meditating and really focusing on my painting and even came across an artist that I admire and who inspires me and who I am now taking a class with until *next* March.

I am attempting to come to terms with my fears (which isn’t easy) – the normal things like the “what if’s” – What if I lose my job again? What if I have nowhere to go? What if I don’t have enough money saved to take care of myself? What if I am scared to live alone? What if something bad happens to me? What if I am never happy working anywhere? Those are just a tip of the iceberg for the questions, I have a huge litany of them. I find myself wondering what I am most afraid of – being overqualified for my job, unhappy with the environment, etc. or missing out on what *could* be.

To get back to the dream, I have to say that I found it fascinating that Jaime made it into my dream. I was friends with Jaime in high school, had a bit of a crush on him (he was so cool to me, he was an avid artist and I loved to draw, but he was the epitome of an artist to me then and I was really intimidated by him) and he has since gone on to become an art teacher and lives in California. He appears to have his life together in a way that I envy and wish for, for myself.

So I am of the belief that this dream, based on what you have relayed, is telling me to essentially trust myself, follow my heart (creatively) and to stay on this new path that I am on for myself. Your interpretation was affirming for me.

Thank you!!

Jackie

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 41 F WNY

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Yes - the other day

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Jackie,
I'll provide a follow-up on Sunday. I do appreciate your detailed response. It shold help in getting deeper into the dream message.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 Male Cocoa, Fl

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} www.powerofdreams.net

Jackie,
I appreciate your detailed response. It provided insights to the dream and the analysis with remarkable similarities in the dream language to your actual life experiences. Not often this is true since dream language is primarily symbolic with only some literal translation. As often the case the dream title says a lot about the dream message. Translated I came up with 'creative aspects/life adventures/various emotional energies'. That seems to fit with your description of your journey in your response.

As for the direction you need to take. Yes, I agree. The dream is pointing to the need for you to follow your creative bliss. And it is acknowledging the obstacles you have faced in the positions you have been in and the fears and anxieties you still have regarding your future. As for Jaime he would represent the success you seek in your creative self {your masculine aspect representing success and strength}. He has achieved what you wish to achieve for yourself using strength and perseverance. As you stated, "He appears to have his life together in a way that I envy and wish for, for myself". Your anxieties in coming to grips with your fears are addressing in almost exact language. In the dream there is, "What if I can’t get to where I want to go? What if I go too far to the wrong place?" There is a lot of language in the dream that reflects what yo state in your response, especially your determination to go left {following your creative aspects} instead of right {social duty/doing what you are told}.

These parts of the dream are defined in my analysis and your confirmation. The next task is to determine what underlying energies exist within your psyche that make up who you are and why you act in certain experiences/environments. In the third paragraph there is this; 'I listen to the other people' which when translated -not following desired path/following other people's lead. This has led you in the wrong direction on several occasions {as with the terrible jobs}. My sense is this is an aspect of your personality which, when looking for the source for personality and attitudes, goes back to childhood when traits and instilled habits are formed {from the environment in which you grew up and lived}. Hopping on the bus {your total self} closest to you {first paragraph} would suggest you are following your programming from early life. Only after inner reflection do you realize you are on the wrong bus. But because of the programming you tend to have 'to see where it is going'. That is social/family programming, following the money/career instead of your bliss. Look to your childhood and relationship with family and environment to see how that fits.

The dream ends with, 'I then opted to head out to look for Park-wherever'. Not knowing exactly where you are going {wherever} but looking for Park{hurst}. The 'park' is not stated as Elmwood {the artistic neighborhood} but it is a park which represents a temporary escape from reality as well as renewal, meditation, and spirituality, a period of a readjustment. But because Parkhurst is not Elmwood there is still aspects of indecision. That would be a statement of the anxieties and fears you still have in life. To get to those a deeper introspection is necessary, getting to the core of your psyche, starting with childhood to determine what are the energies that drive unconsciously you. One avenue in doing this, the one I took, is Jung's Individuation Process {Individuation is the development of one's individual personality through a bringing-to-consciousness and assimilation of unconscious tendencies}. Read my pages on the topic and see if it fits.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 Male Cocoa, Fl

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} www.powerofdreams.net

Hi Jerry,

Thank you for your response. I can certainly identify with all of the aspects of your response. With regards to the Programming, I can, without a doubt, say that was largely influenced by my parents and their beliefs surrounding work that were instilled. I KNOW I am trying to break my thought process out of that frame of thinking. The thoughts are limiting for me and are not proving to help me in my happiness process and working creatively.

I will take a look and read the information on the Individuation Process and see how it relates.

Thank you for linking that!

Jackie

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 41 F WNY

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Yes

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Repost of earlier dream

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 68 Cocoa, Fl