January 14, 2020 – Fun with Danielle: Danielle (my old math tutor) and I are in a relationship. She has a playful and fun personality. We are going to the bedroom where we will be intimate. She comments about my ‘giving her ‘head,’” as if to make fun with the play on words. I perform a short act of oral sex on her, after which we are just enjoying one another’s company and conversation in the bed. It is a large apartment with spacious rooms and a very large bedroom with what I think is a king sized bed. Then, when talking, still in the bedroom, she tells me she has gone for a psychic reading and that Alex (storefront owner from the Game Shop I used to go to in my childhood) passed messages to her through the psychic. I wondered over this, as Alex has appeared in my dreams through the years bearing important messages for me. Danielle has a little pad of paper on which she writes notes to me. When I see it, I am happy to learn that she so often thinks of me and writes her thoughts down. We continue having fun conversation and then it is 3:30 AM and my musical alarm sounds. I say to Danielle, “Oh my goodness, it is time for me to get up for work!” Danielle smiles, as if to say, “I am sorry, but we were having fun.” END.

Jerry,

I found the dream very interesting and responsive to my thinking about the last dream I posted here concerning the "Female Prisoner," of which I said/wrote that maybe I was sometimes being too "rational" when weeping. Danielle was my math tutor in 2015-2016, when I was back in school to earn my Bachelor's degree and taking Calculus. She is a homosexual (I am not) and from what I could tell of her role in her relationship with her significant other, she does lean more to the masculine role in her relationship. Interesting also is the play on words, "giving her head." This dream really makes me smile, as I consider how my unconscious so immediately responded to my thoughts and feelings about being too rational. Hence, my decision to also post this one, as it seems a good example of how responsive our unconscious can be when working toward healing and wholeness. I understand its message to be reminding me (in a very playful way) that "both/and" is the way to be in greater balance and not either/or - to not disown one mode or aspect of being in favor of the other. So, telling me to also love and engage the Danielle in me. Alex was a loving and caring man from my childhood, old enough to be a father or grandfather to me, whose dream messages/images have always been healing and helpful. I think I should look back at my dreams of Alex, which is one of the reasons I started to keep an electronic dream record years ago, for it makes it very easy to search back for key words and themes.

Kristi

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 53, USA

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Yes, 01/02/2020

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Kristi,
In your most recent dreams I sense real progress in your inner journey. This dreams seems to be pointing more of that, a positive dream and positive progress. I think I have mentioned previously that when you discover the creative being you begin to walk down the path to true wholeness. I see this dream as pointing to your creative self, even has words to that extent {musical alarm}. The time 3:30 is a numerical 9 which of course in Jungian terms represents wholeness and healing. Healing by realizing your creative self and looking beyond the rational world {as you state, being too rational} society and normal conscious requirements in the world at large we live in. You have pondered these creative aspects before but either you are giving greater consideration to them or/and the dream is directing you to do so. Read my interpretation of the individual images and actions {by sentence} and see what you think.

One note about Danielle and her inclusion in this dream. Since she is gay doesn't automatically mean an interest in her sexuality. Sex represents {symbolically} an integration and merging of contrasting aspects of yourself. There are positive qualities about Danielle you find appealing. Something about her that completes you. Being heterosexual and dreaming that you are having sex with someone of the same sex, then it represents an expression of greater self love and acceptance {again symbolically}. Any literal applications would be natural as well since sex is a greater drive of the natural psyche. Again a positive aspect within the dream that allows you to open up to your true self and the best way forward in self discovery.

Interpretation of Images/Actions
Danielle (my old math tutor) and I are in a relationship.
-evaluating guidance/personal aspects provided by Danielle as well as your inner qualities

She has a playful and fun personality
-your own inner qualities or desires for these qualities

We are going to the bedroom where we will be intimate.
-getting to know this part of yourself

She comments about my ‘giving her ‘head,’” as if to make fun with the play on words
-it is ‘what’s in your head’, your psychology

. I perform a short act of oral sex on her, after which we are just enjoying one another’s company and conversation in the bed.
-your willingness to give or receive pleasure/joy, a conversation with your unconscious {verifying you are headed in right direction in your personal journey}


It is a large apartment with spacious rooms and a very large bedroom with what I think is a king sized bed.
-A BRIDGE BETWEEN CONSCIOUS AND UNCONSCIOUS/EXPANSIVE ASPECTS WITHIN YOURSELF AND ABILITY/DESIRE TO LEARN


Then, when talking, still in the bedroom, she tells me she has gone for a psychic reading and that Alex (storefront owner from the Game Shop I used to go to in my childhood) passed messages to her through the psychic.
-SEARCH AND DISCOVERY OF UNCONSCIOUS ASPECTS INCLUDING using your imagination/creative aspects

I wondered over this, as Alex has appeared in my dreams through the years bearing important messages for me.
-exploration over time of your imagination/creative self

Danielle has a little pad of paper on which she writes notes to me.
-what has been a small aspect in your life/past and at times consciously taking notice {imagination/creativity}

When I see it, I am happy to learn that she so often thinks of me and writes her thoughts down.
-consciously realizing the positive aspects of your creative self

We continue having fun conversation and then it is 3:30 AM and my musical alarm sounds.
-discovering your true path and the wholeness it brings to life {musical, the muse}
I say to Danielle, “Oh my goodness, it is time for me to get up for work!” Danielle smiles, as if to say, “I am sorry, but we were having fun.”
-overcoming anxieties/inner fears and enjoying/being your true self


Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 69 Altoona, Fl

Jerry,

Yes, I am seeing significant progress in my life right now, even though my dreams still take me to my difficult past. I cannot tell you how inspired I have always felt to write. Having said that, even in this moment of writing to you now, the inspirational prompting (what I believe is a literal prompting from spirit) courses through my body, tingling me to my core. I have pondered this for all of my life - and my dreams appear to confirm my need to write. In one, I carried a book with a first aid symbol on it. In another, I was told I possessed a golden book. And, rather recently, there was a dream of several others asking me, "Won't you write our story?" Imploring me, "Please tell our story." I have been giving this much greater consideration lately and have even reached out to a writing coach concerning this. The writing coach is something my analyst has advised against - and I agree - as my story need to be my own voice, not shaped by the opinion of another.

I can see that musical alarm as the muse in me telling me it is time to get to work (as 0330 is my waking time for my week day work schedule) on this endeavor. I do believe the writing will carry me forward into greater healing and wholeness.

I did not at all interpret my involvement with the Danielle of my dream as indication of actual sexual interest in her or any other woman, for I do know that sex in dreams is more often about integration and merger of aspects of ourself.

Okay, line by line:

-evaluating guidance/personal aspects provided by Danielle as well as your inner qualities

One of the things I admired about her was her willingness to not hide her homosexuality from others, though she also did not flaunt it or feel a need to make a statement with her way of life and loving. I saw her as intelligent and enterprising. What I interpreted from her is that she felt free to be who she is. I can definitely take a lesson from that, as in giving me license/freedom to be and show the world the truth of my own being. A truth I have until now hid from the world at large - the childhood sexual abuse.

-your own inner qualities or desires for these qualities

The dream certainly left me with a feeling of fun and playfulness, hence my reflecting on it with a smile being felt in my inner being. As I can sometimes get rather blue feeling when revisiting painful memories from my past, it had the effect of reminding me to be light hearted. Danielle does possess a fun and positive spirit. Incorporating more of this will be useful to me. In the moment of this writing, I am reminded of my belief that though we all possess the unique dramas that life writes in our lives, underneath it all, we are love - and this love looks for expression in the world.

-getting to know this part of yourself

Yes. Spending time with the Danielle in me that is all of intelligent, enterprising and fun and playful - all good skills to incorporate into my life and my writing.

-it is ‘what’s in your head’, your psychology

In this moment of responding, I am seeing how it is that my personal history has engrained faulty patterns of thinking in my life, like shame and blame. In my way of seeing her, Danielle did not express shame for being a homosexual - and I needn't feel shamed by my history.

-your willingness to give or receive pleasure/joy, a conversation with your unconscious {verifying you are headed in right direction in your personal journey}

I also think it is asking me to love myself, to take pleasure and joy in loving myself. I think when we more fully love ourselves, we free ourselves to more truly love and give/receive joy/pleasure with others. Yes, I must seek within my own self/unconscious for the continued healing needed in my life.

-A BRIDGE BETWEEN CONSCIOUS AND UNCONSCIOUS/EXPANSIVE ASPECTS WITHIN YOURSELF AND ABILITY/DESIRE TO LEARN

This does describe the space I am in at present!

-SEARCH AND DISCOVERY OF UNCONSCIOUS ASPECTS INCLUDING using your imagination/creative aspects

The message of what you have written her comes through very strongly for me. I can feel the importance of using my imaginative and creative aspects in my life and my writing. I rather think the story is one that will write me. I strongly feel that I must put my rational self aside and allow the creative process to take the lead.

-exploration over time of your imagination/creative self

Agree.

-what has been a small aspect in your life/past and at times consciously taking notice {imagination/creativity}

It makes me think of the many notes I have made (many pieces I have written) when feeling inspired to look reflectively/creatively at my life story.

-discovering your true path and the wholeness it brings to life {musical, the muse}

I do believe writing is my path forward. This is something that was strongly impressed upon me as a child - as though I was being told that it was the one thing that would give meaning to all the suffering I would endure, even though I did not see/understand the whole story at that time.

-overcoming anxieties/inner fears and enjoying/being your true self

Jerry, I am impressed by the fact that I came back to your dream forum revealing a major truth of my being, which was/is my very painful past, something I was too afraid to publicly share in earlier years. My true self has no need to hide the story of my life, knowing that though it shaped me, it does not ultimately define me. I believe this truth can and will be more fully realized in my life when/as I write the story.

I notice that my responses to this dream today focus on my desire to write - and I strongly feel held in a cocoon of loving inspiration encouraging to move forward with this task. This must be where I am meant to be at this moment in time.

Two days ago, I received a message telling me my brother (one year senior to me) was taken to the hospital in the middle of the night because of a heroin overdose. He does not live in the same city as me. I called the hospital and learned he was treated with Narcan, rested, and released. This is something that happens so often in big cities, I am sure, and they are just put back out on the streets. I wept deeply for him, praying for him, and I just felt inside of me, all the more deeper reason, all the more strongly why I must write the story. Love and nurture is so sorely missing in our world. Broken childhoods become broken lives.

Kristi

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 53, USA

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} January 13, 2020

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Kristi,
Sorry and sad to hear about your brother. Happy to know he is OK, for now. Too few know how and why such things happen {addictions} but we all have them {food, drugs, sex, etc.}. In so many if not most instances you can go back to childhood. The stimulus begins there. You and I know first hand, literally, having explored our childhoods and seeing and acknowledging those childhood experiences as foundations for decisions and actions in later life. Unfortunately drug addictions become physical which makes the psychological healing even more difficult.

As for the sexual aspects in this dream. I didn't see any associations to your sexuality. Not any Freudian connections in this dream. I seldom apply literal sexual associations unless there are clear indications. Sex is always a possibility and even when it is benign. It is natural to be inquisitive but that isn't a controlling emotional energy. The first and foremost function of dreams is to express emotional energies. Dreams can display inquisitorial senses but not in an accusatory aspect. I look to the symbolic applications first when it comes to images/actions related to sex {beds, bedrooms, phallic images} unless there are other supporting images/actions that clearly point to a literal application. That happens and I will note this but most often it is symbolic. When a dreamer responds to this analysis they usually admit it {some, if a true association don't respond at all}. They already consciously know there are connections but aren't sure how to react to it.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 69 Altoona, Fl

Jerry,

Thank you for the sympathy for my brother's condition.

And I am sorry if I gave you the impression I thought you were taking a Freudian view at my dream. I knew you were not and merely endeavored to communicate that I also knew this was not the case.

Best,
Kristi

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 53, USA

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} January 13, 2020

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Kristi,
Not to worry, merely referencing Freud. He was wrong on so many of his concepts. Thankfully Jung came along and set it all straight.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 69 Altoona, Fl