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bad dream

Hi,
I had this bad dream and so here goes.
I am at a dance for the disabled and some guy comes up and rubs against me. I turn around and give him a dirty look and he goes away. Then this other guy comes up and leans his whole body up against me from behind. I turn around and he runs.I grab a chair and smash it and have one leg of it in my hand to go and hit him. I go over to his area and yell all sorts of things at him. They laugh at me and I yell 'where is your supervisor? who's in charge of you people?.
Then I figure out he's disabled.
I tone it down and tell him he needs to stop that sort of thing or he could get into real trouble. Then the police show up and the cop is so stupid I tell him I am fed up and I leave. I walk all the way home and realize my car is still at the dance.I remember I felt very strong and beautiful walking. I enjoyed the walk.
I see my brother and sister are making a wall hanging out of a beautiful shirt and shells, jewelery and the like. She is making this wall hanging for her boyfriend. (both of them are very disabled in waking life and are very manipulative - my brother is the opposite). My brother tells her not to use the entire piece of material because he cherishes it. She doesn't listen. I tell him to cut a piece and give it to her himself. I show her a beautiful shell that shimmers. Then I remember my car. I begin to cry and realize this has upset me so much I don't want to go to work.
I try to talk to my Mom but she's busy with my sisters boyfriend (this guy actually grabbed me once and when I confronted him he never spoke to me again-my sister says she doesn't believe me)
I go downstairs to feed the cat and there are 5. I see there is a wedding party going on. The bride is still in white and I see some guy I recognize. I tell him I've seen him before and then I realize he is there to spy on me. He's the team leader of the disabled men at the dance. He thinks I'm going to tell on him. I yell at him **&)&^(^)(^^
and he turns to run.His wife understands me but goes along with him. As he leaves I yell " you are indirect and afraid. It will ruin your life if you don't change it now"!!
Through out the dream I am thinking.. well at least I don't have to go to work today.

In waking life, my sister called my Mom today and asked for a bunch of money because her boyfriends SSDI doesn't cover his meds. I asked her if she wanted some resources (because I know the SSDI does cover this). She said yes which is unusual for her.

My sister and I were talking for awhile this summer
(after 8 years) and I asked if there were something I could do to begin a healing process with her boyfriend. She said I could admit I lied about his abuse. I told her I couldn't do that. We ended our talks at that point. She's been giving my Mom a hard time over it. I also hate my job.
I am sick and tired of mental health issues all around me. I know this is a lot of stuff
any feedback is most welcome
Leslie

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 52 Colorado

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Re: bad dream

Hi Leslie
There is a lot in this dream and I have not read all of it yet.
In the meantime could I suggest you look at some of the links on this (great) site - I would suggest anima. animus and perhaps architypes.
The characters in dreams are often representations of parts of us ,,, that can be a pretty daunting and trying thought but I think you are ready to look at things.

This dream seems to bring us issues relating to your father, and /or men.
Do you have history there? Issues of trust? boundaries overstepped?
Your self image - feeling disabled, but knowing you have a beautiful creative side. You are able to see through the superficial.
Have you put your life on hold? Forgotten it so to speak - left it in the past somewhere?
Do the words in your dream speak to / of yo in any way? (" you are indirect and afraid. It will ruin your life if you don't change it now") ,,, it seems like a call to action.

My apologies for this pointed form but I wanted to get something back to you that you might chew over. If you could post your thoughts it would be appreciated.
JC

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47 Brisbane Australia

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} M

Re: bad dream

yes and yes again. I will spend time on the animus information. this dream confuses me to a degree.. and some of it I do understand.
I'll get back to you when I've read more here.
thanks very much!
Leslie

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 52 Colorado

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} f

Re: bad dream

Hi JC,
I'm not sure this had to do with my Dad. I've done lots of work on that and feel pretty close to him. However, the leftover issues of boundaries - perhaps my own because I really am sick of my jobs. For some reason it's just not in me anymore to do the work I've loved for 25 years. I believe the disabled men are indeed my animus and I just don't know what to do with that energy now. I keep trying and I think I need to move in a different direction. I'm reliving old trauma's through these jobs. I didn't expect it.
I've prided myself on being the one person in my family who functions in the real world. Now I feel pretty blown away. These dreams are giving me information on this.. I just don't know how to use them in this time of change.
Leslie

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 52 Colorado

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} f

Re: Re: bad dream

Hi Leslie,
Although no one walks in anothers shoes, through my own life I can undrestand how you feel. It has helped me greatly to learn about the ideas of Jung and Campbell (primarily) - and realise that others have walked this path, and that know it or not we are all on our own path - towards the expression of our own individual selves,,,, this is the true task of life,, and the path of the hero that myths describe. To know that I was not alone and that I was not crazy really helped me.

I think there is a lot of symbolism in your dream - as you 'chew' it over n your mind, ideas will come and go, new levels on self understanding will unfold. You may be shocked, slap yourself on the knee as you realise the reason for something - it takes gentle courage and persistance.

I wonder if there is a clue in your dream -'I see my brother and sister are making a wall hanging out of a beautiful shirt and shells, jewelery and the like. She is making this wall hanging for her boyfriend' ,,,, is there a latent creative side to you? something that you have thought you couldn't do?

all the best
JC

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47 Brisbane Australia

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} M

Re: bad dream

yes actually, I've been told several times that I could illustrate childrens books or sell my dolls.
they're a bit unusual ( my dolls). I feel the competition out there is formidable. My brother is a gifted artist and has his work in museumes around colorado and new mexico.
Truth be told, I'm very depressed right now.
I like what you said about being patient. I feel like a bit of a failure and I'm not patient with myself at all. I don't have it in me to work with people like I used to. It is traumatic and I'm sick of it. Last night, a woman came in to the shelter who had been beat up and raped. I kind of fell apart and just walked out. I would love to do my art but it's expensive. Maybe there's a way. I'll think on it.
and thank you for your tender replys JC. I appreaciate it more than I can express
L

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 52 Colorado

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Re: Re: bad dream

Hi Leslie,
Thank you for you open replies - it really helps to confirm the value of dream interpretation.,,, and that something from within ourselves can help us unfold ourselves (if we are willing, and put in some effort) to bloom fully.
I would encourage you to look at some of the work by Joseph Campbell, and Jung - great links on this site.
The concept of transition is not one often spoken about (or acknowledged) in everyday modern life - mostly transitions are not even recognised and therefore ignored,,,, with ,,,,,, consequences.
You have taken the first and perhaps the hardest step - and it seems as though there are some hidden talents that deserve expression
JC

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47 Brisbane Australia

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} M

Re: bad dream

Hi Justin,
Thank you for your support. I wanted to follow up and tell you this dream I had last night.
I was at my brother's house in the mountains.
(In waking life he speaks often of the ghosts he lives with there - I have wanted to ask him what they are and if he could let them go)
projection!
I'm walking to the school bus and decide to take a path I've never taken. My dog is with me. I meet a little girl-about 10 or 12 yrs old. This little girl is very brainy and conservative-I think.. this ought to be interesting! We both have our books and I tell her I've never gone this way, and could I walk with her. She says sure. As we walk I notice the sun is out and the snow is melting. So the two of us are off to school and I'm going in a new direction!

I am remembering that I did create this change in my world. Perhaps like an old skin that is shedding, it's slow and I'm stubborn
Leslie

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 52 Colorado

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} f

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