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A strange gender change

I don’t dream often but had a dream a few months ago which has puzzled me and which keeps coming back into my mind.

My dream began where I was walking into a Cathedral with a tall spire and then down the aisle towards the nave. It seemed familiar to me but it was completely deserted. It was quite dark inside with only the fading sunlight coming through the windows. Then I noticed a woman praying alone in one of the central pews with her head bowed so I could not see her face. She had shoulder length dark hair and was darkly tanned and dressed in veils and a wide colourful red and brown skirt and I felt I knew her well but she did not look familiar to me. I could smell her perfume and the oils on her body.

She was crying bitterly and I went to comfort her but next minute I was walking in open fields which were full of buttercups and poppies. There was a tall bushy solitary oak tree on a small grassy mound in the centre of the field and I could see the woman sitting under it with her head in her hands and still crying deeply but now very softly, just sobbing.

I tried to walk toward her but suddenly I found myself walking through some thick woodlands and in the dark centre of the woods I came to an old log cabin. I went inside and it was very gloomy. It seemed that someone had been living in the cabin with a large log fire burning and the remains of what must have been a very lavish meal but the cabin was deserted.

I wandered into the bedroom behind the chimney place as I had a feeling that someone was in there but there was no one. The bedroom and the bed were decorated in purple and red and with a woman’s toiletries neatly placed on a dresser. For some reason I undressed and went into the shower. The water was warm and comforting and I closed my eyes in the soapy suds and spray and I just seemed to drift away. I then felt someone enter the shower behind me and tried to turn to see who the person was but something was stopping me. It was then I realised that my feet and hands were manacled.

The person behind me began to hug and caress me without speaking and I felt comfortable and relaxed but after a while I felt a penis pushing gently against me. It was a very strange feeling. As a man, I felt it to be very uncomfortable, humiliating, and embarrassing and I wanted to move away but did not as I was enjoying the comfort of the hands caressing me and ignored the rubbing of the penis. Eventually I was slowly able to turn and as I did I could feel the enlarged penis enter my front, but I still could not see the person’s face. I remember I kept thinking this can’t be happening, I’m a man, I don’t have a woman’s sex organs – but it was happening.

Then I smelled the perfumes and oils again and as I was slowly able to open my eyes I saw a mass of dark hair and realised it was the woman I had seen earlier who was now making love to me. I wanted it to stop and wanted to pull away but it became so intensely pleasurable that I didn’t ever want it to stop. It constantly went through my mind, how can a woman with a penis be making love to me!. But it became a deeply enjoyable feeling and the most ecstatic experience of my life. My mind just slid away from me. At almost the point of climax it all suddenly stopped and I was lying naked and manacled again on the ground outside the cabin. The woman was looking out of the cabin window but was gazing into the distance and she was still crying. Again I wanted to go to her but it was then that I lost the dream and for a while lay in bed half-wakened trying to recover it, but as with all such dreams, it didn’t happen.

I’ve always been a strictly heterosexual guy and have no wish to be any different so this dream really shocked me.

Have any others experienced a gender change in a dream?. I’m lost to understand this dream and its meaning as such an experience would not have occurred to me in waking life – I have not been with a regular partner for a few years so was this my animus becoming activated?.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 45 Sorrento

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Man

Re: A strange gender change


I've not experienced gender change in dreams. As a female I do dream of sex with females. I'm hetero and accept sexual orientation as a natural part of Self whether gay, lesbian or heterosexual. Many times dreams of sex are symbolic of union. Depending on the dream it can be symbolic of integration complete or needing to develop and integrate, of a repressed or lessor aspect for balance of the Psyche.

It appears this is what this dream is communicating. A need to integrate your anima or bring to consciousness and fully utilize repressed feminine aspects/traits. Colors here may symbolize those emotions or feminine traits -brown, red (skirt and poppies), yellow or gold (buttercups), purple. In the beginning of your dream the female openly expresses her emotions. Do you tend to repress your emotions opting for masculine rational thought as 'indulging' in emotions a sign of weakness or inappropriate?

This is by no means a thorough interpretation and for that I apologize. I'm mired with work right now. With your response and finally! what could be a work free weekend coming up perhaps we can look deeper into the dream with more detail over the weekend.

Many thanks,

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 43 Central OH

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

Re: A strange gender change

Dear Carlos and Kathy,

After reading your posts, I find this forum really interesting. I dream almost every night and they are detailed and for most, have influenced my life in so many ways. I can still remember dreams that have happened a decade ago. I have a friend who is a professor in Psychology in San Francisco and she has always been fascinated by my dreams.

Carlo's dream is very similar to one that I had last week. Its the same concept, for me to be male and then having sexual intercourse with another man where I became a woman. It was a bit hilarious (and gross, mind you!) when the man in the dream was Prince Charles!! I am not embarrased to admit that though.

Kathy, for your analysis, I have royal blood and I am from a line of royal ancestors, not that its of any importance to me though. Would this have any relation to the dream since Prince Charles is there?

Anyway, hope we can share comments and dreams. I have always wanted to share my dreams with experts and anyone who may have similar dreams and compare experiences (if any) in their daily lives. Hope to hear from you.

Best wishes,


Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 32, Malaysia

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

Re: A strange gender change


Welcome to the Dream Forum. Gerard and every one on the Forum have created a wonderful place to explore many aspects of the Self be it the Psyche toward psychological balance and understanding, of our inner Self and others, the metaphysical, spiritual, the collective experience...all through dreams. It is an excellent place for open discussion and dialogue so we all may share with and learn from each other.

You make a sound point in not being embarrassed by the content of our dreams. Openness is an important factor when looking at dreams, both for the dreamer and interpreter. Opening our conscious to non literal meaning of dreams unlocks the gateway for honest examination. It removes the social stigmas we’ve been indoctrinated to allowing the conscious to listen as the unconscious speaks freely to the fundamental psychology of the personal and collective Psyches. This also acts to facilitate and support the individual spiritual pathway which is an important aspect of the Self and the Individuation process.

With Jung’s approach to psychological wholeness dreams, and dream symbols, can hold several meanings. Dreams are an efficient means of communication from the unconscious to the conscious. For each of us symbolism in dreams is both personal and collective. On a personal level your royal lineage likely adds a personal dimension to interpreting a Prince symbol. On a deeper level, in relation to the inner Self, the symbolism would then be viewed as a collective or universal symbol. In this interpretation your royal lineage would not be as prominent in interpreting the symbol as the symbol then takes on a meaning derived from the whole of human experience.

I hope I was able to answer your question. The Myths, Dreams, Symbols site contains a wealth of information on many topics conducive to balance of both the inner and outer experience. I hope you will return to make MDS & the Forum a part of your Journey as many others have.

Kind regards,

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 43 Central OH

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

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