Power of Dreams/MDS Dream Forum
Start a New Topic 
Author
Comment
asked for a dream

Ok..I'll try and keep this simple. I asked for a dream to help me decide how to respond to my sons letter. He has been in Tx. for 3 months and I sent him a letter about his childhood. His letter back was so loving and big. I am having a hard time believing the amount of love and respect he said he has for me. I feel like I'm talking to a stranger which is very odd for me. I also left Denver about 9 months ago.

The one hurt he spoke of was his feeling that I don't validate his truth. This blows my mind since it is also an issue I am working on with my family and my truth. I love his truth. But I've remained intent on believing he can touch enlightenment without drugs. This wont change.
He has the same bright creative edge that my Dad and brother had. Both of them searched for the 'truth', were bright and addicted..and wounded. They both committed suicide. This is the second time I've had a knife dream in response to asking for a help dream.

Dream
It's my birthday and people and gifts are arriving. There are men everywhere and I don't know any of them. They are all drinking and I am not. But I'm in a good mood anyway. Gabe is about 5 and running around collecting rocks for me (something we have always dong for each other in waking life). We are both happy and playful. There is a young woman in the room who is lacking confidence. I ask her if she is aware of her I.Q. and she says no. I tell her it's 140 and she could do anything she wants. She is young, beautiful and sad. I decide to go dancing with all the guys. We race to the car which is a large camper like bus. When we get in we are all soaking wet from sweat and sort of sliding around on each other. I start laughing because I think this is funny. I tell the guy next to me it's fun. He puts his arm around me and I wish the other guy would.
Then I am sitting in front and we've stopped for two men who are fighting in the road. One guy is beating the other guy up. The hurt guy is asking for help and we all notice the attacker is pulling a knife out of his jacket and getting ready to kill the hurt guy. The driver of the bus hits the gas to try and run the attacker over, and I put my foot through the glass to kick him in the chest. Then I wake up.

any ideas on this? I understand some of it, but the
sweat, all the guys, and the fight...are confusing.
thanks,

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 52 wisconsin

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

Re: asked for a dream

Hi Leslie,

The bus could be a symbol of the self, and kicking the glass could represent the breaking of a boundary you define yourself within.

Maybe this will accord with the symbolism of the knife as a pruning implement. It's interesting that you have dreams with knives in them when you specifically ask for dreams.

Perhaps you lack confidence in yourself Leslie? I think I know you and if so then you are very, very bright. But suicides can be devastating to one's self-image esp when close family members are the deceased.

All the men around you must have a lot of significance. It felt good to be among them, didn't it? Sharing sweat and dancing speak to close intimacy. I think your animus (everyone's) has many faces, not just the face of your father and brother. But the two men fighting must (I think) represent a struggle within yourself, and it's hard not to wonder whether you are about to put some of your past struggles behind you. In the bus with your multi-faceted anima, you have the strength to do something
about a long, painful struggle.

I know there are some problems in looking at the dream this way but I'd like to hear from you before I guess how to resolve them (if possible).

And I know my own bias is to think of this as a dream of breaking free from encumbrances; does that resonate with you at all?

Jim/Pryzm

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47, Nasvhille, TN

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Re: asked for a dream

Hi Leslie,

I meant to refer to your multi-faceted animus in the bus, not anima (sorry!).

And I also meant to make the fairly obvious observation that the moment of your breaking through the window is equivalent to the moment of awakening. I think that coincidence suggests you are ready to break free from something that's been holding you down.

I'd also like to venture a question that might involve a lot of projection on my part, and I hope it won't offend you. I tend to believe the dream is asking you (in part) to honor all the many faces of your animus, and I wonder if your son feels in a way that you might not have done that? Perhaps that's what he thinks is your failure to validate his truth?

I am very sorry if this question is out of line.

Take care,

Jim/Pryzm

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47, Nasvhille, TN

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Re: asked for a dream

Hi Jim,
If you are the poetry lover from the fishbowl, then yes, we've met! Please don't ever feel a need to apologize to me for anything you want to say. If I'm going to put my business out here for feedback, then I'd better be open to what comes my way..and I am.
This forum does specific kinds of work that I'm very comfortable with.
Ok..so I will try to answer your questions.

When I kicked the glass and hit that one guy in the chest, I did it to knock him down so he would not be run over by the bus. I thought that was going too far. I felt good about it. I also remember the other guy was holding his wallet out and hoping to be identified if he was killed. So yes, this would be a boundary of mine in terms of violence. But it seems in this dream I was comfortable with the necessity of violence..to a point. There are limits or boundaries in my family I would like to bust wide open..
One limit or perhaps unconscious limitation, is that I am starting to see Gabriel very differently than anyone else in the family. I think it's that I see him as a man..and honestly I haven't had a lot of experience with this in my life. And I'm not talking about watching my brothers grow up, but about watching a young man grab onto his sunshine and create something with substance. Like the magician in the tarot deck.
And yes I know for a fact the validation issue is partly projection. I'm scared to death of his bright edge and creative search for the divine, being combined with drugs and alcohol. This is what my dad and brother did. However, I have signed Gabe up for a series of shamanic healing experiences, and one of them will be with me. We both want the opportunity to do whatever needs to be done.
In this way, I'm stepping away from traditional therapy because that's what he wants.
Now, I don't know what the animus has to do with all of this. I would think it would be more about me as a woman/mother? and how I validate my son from a feminine energy?
Could you explain how you think Gabe might feel that as animus?
I do think that it's very possible I am like my mom in not seeing her childrens strenghts or the need to get up and fight back sometimes.
Sometimes I wonder if I really see Gabe at all for who he is or if what I see is a shadowy history of trauma.
Is that what your talking about? Something like that?

I really like what you said about breaking through and that the men on the bus are all parts of me. We were having such a good time! I remember thinking I would not let tradition stand in the way of me being myself and I didn't really give a darn what anyone thought.
This entire series of events is uncanny right now.
It's time for something big and I feel it coming. I was already in therapy working on all this stuff when Gabe wrote. I've never felt so strongly that now is the time to speak openly and honesty to him, listen to him and let things happen. I also believe that in order to go home I will need to have done enough work of my own, to not get caught up in the darkness in my family. That's my main goal right now.
So Jim...geeze..this is really long. But I thought it was so cool that you responded! Hope this answers some of your questions. And again, I'm happy to hear anything you have to say. No need to be careful with me.
Many thanks,
Leslie

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 52 wisconsin

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

Re: asked for a dream

Hi Leslie!

Yes we have exchanged favorite poems from Emily, Edna, and Kahlil on the fishbowl site. Welcome to the MDS web site (if you're new here that is :-) !

I am very sorry for the loss in your life. I read in Hero With a Thousand Faces that walking the line [of individuation] is like walking on the edge of a razor. I think he is quoting from the Upanishads in that passage and it's certainly been true for me.

I wanted to try to answer your question about animus tho today's a rush at work. Let's suppose (just for the sake of my explanation) that your dream is encouraging you to honor all the many faces of your animus, and even that it's doing so b/c there are some faces you might be neglecting (please note that I'm NOT saying this is the case). What if some of those faces represent qualities that are either present in Gabriel now, or align with directions in which he'd like to grow?

I was trying to suggest that in cases like that, he may feel that you aren't validating his truth. Does that idea have any plausibility from your perspective? Sorry if I was unclear earlier but have you asked Gabriel what he means?

Busy day so I'd best close with that remark. I made a resolution to forum members never to post when I'm busy at work (and thereby appear even more foolish than I realize I am) so I'm going to try to keep to it.

But it's very nice to see you here! I hope you are having a great day,

Jim/Pryzm

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47, Nasvhille, TN

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Re: asked for a dream

Hi Jim, yes Gabe and I have talked about what he believes in and his truth involves the use of drugs for spiritual enlightenment. Now that he's sober, we would have more common ground in this area. I have maintained that drugs are seductive in that someone feels 'enlightened', but finding truth is a life process that takes time and work. That is the area of disagreement that he is talking about. I am starting to believe that my dream has more to do with me standing my ground. If the men are part of me, then the man who was hurt..and had the wallet, is a part of me that wants to be identified. I don't know who that is..or what part of me he is. Perhaps it's enough for now that I 'broke through' the window?
I am also well aware that my own wounds over suicide can play a part in how I approach things with Gabe. I'm trying to be very aware of this as we move ahead and not lay my own fears on him. That is a real issue for me.
thoughts?
Leslie

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 52 wisconsin

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

Re: asked for a dream

Hi Leslie,

That's actually a deep question for me. If you can give me some time I'll try to give you a detailed answer from personal experience.

Jim

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47, Nasvhille, TN

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Re: asked for a dream

sure thing, take your time Jim.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 52 wisconsin

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

stats from 7-14-10 to the present