Hi i am really scared and stuff because i have a lot of memory lapses and my friend tells me what happened during one of them and im really scared cause i never act like that usually.

my t told me i have did but idk what that means and im really confused and scared

therapists in the USA cannot diagnose specific dissociative disorders only psychiatrists and psychologists can do that here in the USA. Therapists can say they "Suspect" that you may have DID but they cannot say you definately have DID without proper testing. In order for your therapist to state you have DID (dissociative Identity Disorder) you have to have been given a comprehensive spychological evaluation with special tests for Dissociative Disorders) this test is an extremely long process that is given only by a psychiatrist or psychologist over a two week (sometimes more) time period.

So please dont panic yet about the label DID and not know anything about it. first step is to be refurred to a psychiatrist for psychiatric evaluation. Once the diagnosis is confirmed the diagnosing professional will sit down with you and tell you all your test scores are ie math 12th grade, reading this grade, short term memory this score, long term memory this score, TAT that score, MMPI this score DES that score, DDIS this score, Validity scales this score, specific mental disorder this score ect on down through all the tests that you were given. You will also have to see your physician for a physical and any physical health diagnostic tests that have to be ruled out before you can be diagnosed with DID.

Once you have all your tests done all your treatment professionals will sit down with you and explain what mental or physical health disorders, diseases ect.. on what is called a multiaxail scale is and what your treatment plans are.

If it does turn out that you have DID hey dont panic. all that does is say this is why you have always had this problem and that problem. nothing changes. you just have a name for what is wrong with you. just like someone who has allergies goes and gets tested and finds out that they are allergic to milk products so now they know why every time they ate cheese or drank a glass of milk they got an upset stomach. Being told you have DID just tells you hey heres why you are the way you are all though your whole life time and guess what we can fix it with special type of therapy work just like those with allergies can fix their allergic reactions with the right treatment.

Being DID isnt the end of the world and it is curable. all you need to do is make a commitment to learn about what dissociation is and how you over your whole life time have used it to mentally escape your problems (this involves alot of hard work of looking at your life and things that you have dissociated (Mentally consciously or unconsciously desided not to remember by using dissociation)and then learn new non dissociation ways to handle your problems.

someday you will have all your memories so that they are no longer dissociated into alters.

If you are DID there are some great books out there that your treatment profesionals will have you reading that explain what DID is and what dissociation is and how every person uses dissociation (daydreaming and so on) every day of their lives. ect.. your treatment professionals can help you research based on what your specific problem areas are.

A quick version of what DID is - A child while undergoing extreme abuse daydreams that they are not being abused, that the abuse is happening to someone else. when this happens the memories of the abuse and anything leading up to that abuse and after that abuse gets stored in the childs unconsciousness. Then anytime after that when the child and as they grow and on into adult hood experience anything that reminds them of those memories that are unconsciously stored they switch from being fully aware to daydreaming that they are safe and physically act out those unconscious memories as they pertain to what is going on at the moment.

ie a child Mary is forced to have oral sex. Mary daydreams she is safe and it is her best friend pete who is having to do oral sex. all Marys memories of having oral sex is stored unconsciously as the name Pete. Any time Mary has oral sex from then on she consciously or unconsciously (some people are so in tune with them selves that they remember daydreaming they are floating, sinking ect far away and others dont)daydreams she is safe and her body automatically acts out the unconscious memories that are stored as Pete by completing having oral sex.

to stop this acting as the alter Pete, Mary works with her therapist on learning what momory is stored as Pete and what causes her to switch into acting like Pete and learning how to calm herself when she encounters the things that make her switch into acting like Pete so that she no longer switches into acting like Pete because she know knows what that memory called Pete is and so on.

If you have DId its fixable but it takes many many years of commitment and hard work in therapy. There is no medication for it but you can learn to stop using dissociation as a way to handle your problems and so on.

good luck and take care.