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reflections of myself

Hi all. This is my first post here. What an interesting site!

A few weeks ago, I was driving my red Sentra (I loved that car! 215,00 miles before I gave it to a neighbor, but I have a new Yaris now) up a hill that spiraled counterclockwise. I was in the left lane, and the road was grey. There was no oncoming traffic to worry about (I live in America, where we "typically" drive on the right side of the road).

As I got to the top, I looked out to see a body of water like a lake far below; the day was bright and beautiful. The water was like a lake (and I could see a source like a river in the distance) but it was vividly blue, and roiling far more than any wave pool. Yet it was like a wave pool in a way, b/c there were people playing in the water. Some of them were on floats. I had great trepidation in looking down, but whether that was due to my height above the water or the tremendous energy and life that were inherent in it, I'm not sure (probably both, but mostly the water's energy). The faces of the people were expressionless, almost as if they were painted on. They had no fear b/c they were unaware of the energy in the water.

But in spite of my own fear, there was a woman seated to my right who seemed to be me, seated in the lotus position and looking down unmoved over the people and the water, from our high position.

Then it was time for me to go, so I had to take my car to the left and drop it over a ledge into shallow water below that was pooling in a road. There I was, dead, lying in the water, yet awake, and with eyes open, pointing upward with my right hand at my chest, so that the direction "I" who had the car would take if I followed it (which I did) was to my right. I had to drop the car but there were some elevated sides to the area where the dead "me" lay (like a tub), where the wheels could rest, so I did no damage to that other self. Proceeding onward to the right, I then reached a point where it was time to turn left, but the car would not turn, and there was oncoming traffic. So I had to pick it up myself and negotiate the turn by carrying the car. End of dream.

-----
I'm aware of the spiral as a symbol of individuation, a leftward direction as symbolic of the unconscious, and a car as a symbol of oneself, or possibly ego. I liked the idea that my anima was some kind of Buddha figure, because it seemed to represent some potential within myself.

The water certainly seemed to represent the collective unconscious. But the dream's symbols feel rather like a house of mirrors in retrospect (I mean that reflections of myself kept cropping up), and I'm sure there's more here than I've mentioned. I should also mention that in retrospect it seems as if the ascent and descent were suggestive of two phases of Joseph Campbell's monomyth. And even though I felt fear in the dream, there were no moments of desire...

And I'd surely appreciate any help anyone might offer!

Thanks,

Jim

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47, Knoxville

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

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Re: reflections of myself

seems like the woman in the lotus position and your dead self are indicating that you should look to use your rational side more as you are caught in some depressing intuitive behaviours that are leading you to some type of death. the death may be an ending of your mobility and your ability to think clearly.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 42

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Hall of mirrors

Thanks Carlos,

Something I meant to mention, btw, is that when I looked over the ledge and saw a reflection of myself, the "me" that was dead was completely submerged in water that was perfectly transparent.

The "house of mirrors" effect resulted in a lot of confusion on my part, in trying to unravel the dream, even though my thoughts about it were along the same lines as yours.

On the one hand, you're absolutely right in that the "Buddha-woman" was on my right, and the dead and submerged version of myself was pointing upward, which, because his head was to my right, was actually RIGHTWARD from the perspective of the "me" who was the driver.

And here's something I had forgotten, that your comments helped me to remember: I had a hat on, kind of like a baseball cap (and I don't wear these). I looked over the water with great fear at first, then I had to step back from the edge. Then I looked and had to step back again. Finally, I had to take another step back, remove my hat, and take a deep breath to collect myself, before I could gaze at length at the picture below me. OK, I took the cap off with my right hand... and third time is the charm. Also, there were three versions of me, (but four if you count the car).

On the other hand (and I've been thinking of car as "ego" but that may not be too accurate...), I had to turn leftward when there was oncoming traffic (i.e. other egos?). In the dream there was no right turn in the road at that point, and I had to pick up the car from the inside while I was driving it, kind of like a Fred Flintstone maneuver. As I turned left, the road was also moving downward in elevation btw, as if I were going into the depths. And that was the moment of awakening too; and as a general rule, I try to ascribe some extra weight to the waking moment when I'm doing dream interpretation.

And I'm not sure what the final leftward movement was about; do you have any ideas?

And from another perspective, it was, after all, a counter-clockwise spiral upward (on the left side of the road) that led me in the first place to a vantage point where I could witness the (very scary!) image of the collective unconscious, and encounter the archetypal images of my anima and my "self".

So could it be that individuation, and integration of the unconscious, that leads one to a place where the relationship between consciousness and unconsciousness becomes possibly more mutually accommodating?

I mean, since my journey was (possibly) about validating my unconscious processes, is it plausible that they in turn would validate consciousness? Could that be what those images were doing?

Maybe it was taking a (rational) look at the collective unconscious, and maybe taking it in on a deeper level as well, that allowed me (after a turn to the right) to go deeper in my own creative work (writing fiction).

Ok I admit it, I'm stuck in a hall of mirrors again. The fact that I hate rationalizing doesn't seem to stop me from doing it, and finding myself in a hall of mirrors is often a good symptom that I've done exactly that (again!)! ;-)

Thanks again for your thoughts Carlos. Sorry if I've made a mess of it all. If you're so inclined, I'd welcome any other thoughts you may have.

Best Regards,
Jim

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47, Knoxville

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? this one only

Re: reflections of myself

no steve you didn't make a mess of things. This is part of the process of figuring out your dream.

the cap may have been you limiting your rational abilities. What you were wearing is actually called a cap, as well as a hat. When you cap something you limit its flow. Taking the cap off with the right hand can symbolize using your rational side to enable a free flow of thoughts and growth, or it could mean that you are making a conscious effort to do so. This also seems to allow you to step back and brace yourself.

The car, I would disagree with you, is not really your ego. It is you being in control of the direction you take, and where you go in life. you were driving so you are in control. Larger issues are directing you or limiting the path you are on. It is a gray path, and gray is what it is: unhappy.

YOur final left turn took you downward and that makes sense in the scheme i am working in on your dream. YOur final left turn is the end result of your overall journey as it is, or was.

I think the dream is about your hate of rationalizing. The trip on the spiralling road is not the solution to achieving insight to your subconscious, it is a description of has led you to a type of death.

Now, if you take a look at the people on the lake, their expressionless faces are also a part of you, and they may be a part of you that is telling you to ignore you sub, and continue to as you were, oblivious to the unconscious' suggestion. This is also a description of what has created the parameters in your consciousness that are limiting your direction and view.
yes an intergration of the sub and the conscious is being called for. Most dreams call for this in some way or another. How it is done, lucky for you, is unveiled in your dream. this doesn't always occur. Use your reason and rational is the suggestion your dream makes.

anyway, that is what i think. Hope it helps. if not, then I apologize.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 42

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How Did You Find the Dream Forum? no

Re: reflections of myself

Carlos, it helps a lot. And thanks for taking the time to share your perceptive insights.

Jim

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47, Knoxville

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? this one only


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