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the other church dreams

Kristi suggested that I post the other church dreams that came before and after the "In a Catholic Church" dream.

Dream #1. I go to what is supposed to be our church.I'm returning there after a long absence. It doesn't look the same. The sanctuary is turned sideways. It is now wider than it is deep. There are a lot of people there. It's Saturday afternoon rather than Sunday morning (as usual). A new family has joined, and they are getting a lot of attention. They do everything at the church. They are maybe late 30's and have a son about 12. The son is talking in a loud voice about his dad's special whiskey sour recipe. This seems like a funny thing to talk about in church. I think, it seems like we're here for the liquor. The scene shifts and I'm at my house. The woman of that same family and her husband come to my house. I'm baking brownies. The woman has brought something to cook in my oven. At first I think she's brought brownies, but they're not chocolate, though they have chocolate icing. She's a very confident type,maybe even a control freak. I have the feeling that she's taking my place. Then, I'm in church again only this time my son Adam is there beside me. I'm a stranger there. Nobody notices me. The scene shifts again, and I'm in a bar. My younger son Michael is with me. We're sitting at a table in the middle of the room. We each order an appetizer. They bring the wrong appetizer to one of us. The appetizer consists of small pieces of fried bread-- sort of like small breadsticks. The waitress is Liliana, a woman from my drum group. She's a very gruff waitress. She's busy with lots of customers. After we get our drinks, I see a startling sight in the open doorway of the bar. Silhouetted against the sun as they stand in the door is a group of men. Then they barge into the bar. They're like barbarians. I never see their faces, but I have the impression they are Japanese-style characters as in anime. They are dark and unclear. They may be wearing masks. Everyone else seems to be expecting them. They always come at this time. I think it's the Happy Hour. Michael puts the hood up on his hoodie and slumps down in his chair. This is something to be endured. The invaders may have swords, but they don't kill anybody or hurt anyone. They push chairs over, shove people, disrupt the place, maybe even kick people. Then, they leave as suddenly as they appeared. Michael comes out of his hood and gives a shrug. This is just the way it is. It happens every day like this. Then, everything returns to normal. You have to just let the barbarians come in and take over, do their thing, and then they're gone. I'm surprised at how accepting everyone is of this.

Dream # 2. I'm in the basement, in what seems to be the educational wing of a church. I'm waiting for things I need for making and showing a movie. There's a black man, dressed in a suit, sitting at a table. The movie I'm going to make may be about his work. The stuff for the movie is delivered in a large canvas bag. But the bag is unmarked, and the black man doesn't know what it is. I think it has only one letter on it, the letter T, but I'm sure that this is my package. Hurriedly, before church starts, the black man is showing me how to do something with clear movie film (it's not dark the way movie film usually is but totally clear). He's showing me how to clean it with some sort of fluid. I'm thinking, "He doesn't realize what a waste of time it is to give me instructions." Then, an overweight woman is in the maze-like hallway in this same basement. She's heading up to the service. She has her hair in a bun. She has intense blue eyes. I tell her I've just seen her former husband, but I realize I've used the wrong word. I don't think they were married. And I tell her I have also seen her son, a little boy. She fiercely looks me in the eye and says she doesn't have a former husband or a child. But I know she's in denial. She walks up to the sanctuary via the narrow staircase. I'm keeping the nursery, and of course, I don't want to. The woman's son is in there (the son she denied having). He's about four or five years old. I hear the Arrowoods (real-life people who go to our church) coming. I hear one of their girls say, "Daddy, why are you so mad?" Then I hear him explaining something in a patient and gentle voice that doesn't sound mad at all.

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Re: the other church dreams

harriett,
The first dream does seem to be addressing your spiritual identity, the old and the new possibilities. I will break the dream down by changes of scenes. The last part may have other applications {barbarians} but I can see the following as one of those.

Dream 1
Returning to your true spiritual self. There is less dogma and more expansion of possibilities. Your whole self is engaged {as it should be}. The ages 30 and 12 both equal 3 which is symbolic of completeness {trinity} in Christianity but is one short of 4 {which in Jungian psyche represents wholeness and balance}. Losing spiritual inhibitions {alcohol}. A developing masculine attitude is taking place {boy of 12}.

Another aspect of self enters into your psyche domain {woman of same family}. The brownies may be metaphor for the mystical aspect {brownies=fairies- (folklore) fairies that are somewhat mischievous }. Ovens are often symbolic of the womb. Chocolate may be the nurturing of the mystical {or non-traditional} spiritual aspects. But there are other controlling agents in your life {control freak}
.
You are in need of escaping from something {bar}. There is the developing masculine aspect present {younger son}. A desire to center yourself. You are a stranger to the other spiritual possibilities. You are searching for that true spiritual identity but have yet to find it {appetizer}. There is the constant reminder of the bread {wafer} of life {given in Christian churches along with wine/grape juice}. The startling light in the doorway is the awakening to other spiritual possibilities. But these possibilities also have their 'masculine identities' {as with patriarchy}. But they do less harm. Japanese traditions of masculinity are less patriarchal and more practical in its use. It is their long held custom, culture.

Back to your normal routine. What is needed is an 'invasion' of new possibilities of spiritual identity. That thought is in your mind but the application has yet to thoroughly take place.

Summary
The dream as a whole is addressing those old demanding spiritual aspects and the new developing spiritual possibilities, and the realities that they present.

Dream 2
Basements are the deep unconscious where you learn about your true self. Movies in a dream are about the dreamer. The black man is your shadow masculine aspect. The bag contains the different possibilities {also symbolic of the womb}. There is no marked belief system. T is for Truth. You are developing a clear path to that true self, it is no longer in the dark. You are in a hurry to realize this TRUTH. Instructions are needed but resistance is the prevailing attitude {due to indoctrination?}.

The search is becoming a heavy burden {overweight woman} in your search for that deeper spiritual identity {waking life emotions}. This woman is you, an aspect that refers to your life as is, a denial of sorts about waking life aspects {no husband or son}.
There is a reversal to old habits. The developing masculine aspect is retreating. waking life aspects are in command. But those conditions aren't as harsh as they could be. You do have an understanding and compassionate husband.

Summary
There is that true desire to find that true spiritual identity but there seems to be a 'blockage' in that search. Most likely due to waking life circumstances and also indoctrination. There also may be a resistance to this self discovery. Again due to indoctrination, but perhaps also because your husband doesn't strongly discourage you in your search. {your husband may also be metaphor for your own developed masculine identity which is weak, one that is trying to take on a new spiritual identity {young son}.

These dreams, as are all dreams, are addressing your 'true' waking life emotions, conscious and unconscious. And waking life experiences. The revealing aspect of the dreams seems to be the weak masculine self when it comes to your true spiritual identity. That is probably due to life long indoctrination in spiritual values, a less demanding husband who accepts/tolerates your search, and the reality that other religions and spiritual philosophies alone do not hold all the answers.

Where do you go from this point? A continued search, focused on what the soul desires. The outside influences must be integrated with the inner search. But it is the inner search, something that takes time and discipline that must be the true focus.

What about your creative self. Is there a creative aspect, or a cause you strongly believe in, that could help with identifying that true self? Campbell's assertion to 'follow your bliss' isn't just a motto. It has deeper meaning and application to discovering the true self.

gerard/Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 58 Murfreesboro, Tn

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Re: the other church dreams

Gerard,

Thanks again. It's amazing how much you can see in a dream. And I'm sorry that they often boil down to a major message to me that I'm resisting. At least, I'm sorry in the sense that I want to stop resisting. I am not sure if there's anything I can do to make the application of those new possibilities of spiritual identity take place, other than to follow what's going on by paying attention to my dreams. I feel that my major blockage is caused by indoctrination, although that word sounds harsh to me. But when I am aware of being blocked from moving in a new direction, the messages I'm hearing are harsh. They're Old Testament messages ("God is a jealous God," etc.). It's the same kind of voice as the negative editor that a writer hears or the inner Predator written about in WOMEN WHO RUN WITH THE WOLVES. Yet I know that that negative voice is wrong. It's what I want to leave behind. Okay, now I see that you have answered my question, where do I go from this point? Continue the search, focusing on what the soul desires. And give it time. A dream last night contained a very positive and numinous image for me. I went to the home of the woman who usually hosts the meditation group I've been in for the past couple of months. When she answered the door, she had the most impressive hair I had ever seen. It was high on her head and blonde and glowing. And she had the biggest, happiest smile on her face. A smile of pure joy. I said, "Your hair is beautiful! You look like Barbara Stanwyck in an old movie." She laughed at that, and then I realized what she really looked like. A queen. She looked like Queen Marie Antoinette. Then, I looked closer, and her hair looked molded like candle wax. That seemed to me like a positive dream about a different kind of spiritual influence. Maybe even a spiritual light. Harriett

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Re: the other church dreams

harriett,
No need to apologize for something that has to come natural. It is a time consuming 'adventure'. And within time you will begin to see, and experience those needed changes. The important thing is you are working toward that end. Stay the course, follow your soul and everything will fall into place. I know that from experience.

If I may I will tell a story, a true story of how things do fall into place when you let go and follow the soul. Actually it is two stories following pretty much the same path. One is my own adventure back in 1994. The other is my son's recent move to Orlando. It is amazing the similarities in the two stories. Although both were with the intent of 'follow our bliss', mine was done consciously, knowing the patterns of the hero cycle. My son's was less informed but a 'blissful' flight all the same.

My First Hero Adventure
In January of 1994, at the age of 44, less than 2 years after the end of my 3rd marriage and two years after my introduction to Joseph Campbell {The Power of Myth}, I set out to relocate to a warmer climate and to be closer to the ocean {what some psychologist call 'running to the sea', a midlife thing}. This had been an obsession for nearly 3 years, to live in Florida. I had researched the mid Florida area {before computers and Google} and had decided on Lakeland, Florida, in-between Orlando and Tampa on I-4. It seemed like te perfect place to start over.

When I left I had about $2000 to my name, knew no one there, did not had any prospects for employment or a place to live. But I was enthused, set on living that adventure along the lines of the hero path, not afraid. One day after I arrived in Lakeland I found the perfect place to rent {a mobile home on Reynolds Rd}. Three days after I arrived I found employment selling fence for a local company. That next Sunday I visited the most wonderful Unitarian church where I felt at home spiritually {that was when I was still going to church}. Everything fell into place as if it were scripted to do so. Follow your bliss, as Campbell instructed, and you will come to bliss.

A side tale to this story about finding the job. I dropped off my resume on Wednesday. The owner of the business {who lived in Tampa} just happened to be in town on Thursday and we set up an interview. It just so happens he was looking for a new salesperson. He hired me on Friday.
Luck? Perhaps. Or was it I was following my soul's desire and when you do that you discover, and receive, the helping hands of fate. It is a part of nature, a mechanism within nature that gives when needed and takes equally when deserved.
At least that is my philosophy, something I have lived by every since I took that first adventure.

My Son's Story
I have an only child, Jerry, who is now 36, married and has fathered three children. He too got the Florida bug within the past two years {His wife Liz agreed}. Although his story is less dependent on happenstance than mine the similarities are striking.

Jerry had taken over the major part of my fence construction business here in Tennessee {I had reduced it to parttime, enough to live on while concentrating more and more on my dream work and MDS} and had done a terrific job in doing so. But he wanted to move to Florida where his father-in-law and mother-in-law {she is his age, mid 30s} had relocated within the past two years. They were close and socialized a lot. It helped to know they were already there.

On with the story. Jerry left for Florida Dec 26th of last year {almost 15 years to the day I left}. He and his family were to stay with his in-laws {a great 4 bedroom house with pool, fenced yard, the perfect place for two families with 3 kids, 4 cats and 3 dogs}. He had two jobs on the horizon but nothing concrete. He probably had a bit more money saved than I did but nothing to insure stability for any length of time. His concern was to get the 'jobs' lined up so to go to work asap. In between the time he left and today he has not only secured a job as managing partner of Orlando Fence Company {the owner had given little attention to the business while concentrating on other business interests} but also successfully transferred a parttime job with Fed Ex {for the insurance}. Everything has fallen into place. He is living in sunny Florida where the attitude fits his psyche, where he has employment, a great place to live and family to share life.

The theme in these two tales are
1}Like father like son. The influences of childhood should never be under-estimated.

2} and most important, follow your bliss. When you do so you will find there are those helping hands {some call angels}, What I believe to be {as did Campbell} a natural aspect of the collective psyche that awaits all who dare adventure the hero journey. Whether it be relocating to another state or just relocating the center of your soul, there is that mechanism within nature that insures success when you let go of the ego centered self, and recenter yourself in the Self.
I think so. No. I know so. From experience.

One last comment involving spirituality. After leaving the Christian identity behind and seeking new places to nourish my spiritual soul, I tried several 'unorthodox' churches. One was Unity churches. This is a great place if you want to stay within the confines of the 'Christian' faith. They teach from the bible but metaphorically. Everyone is welcome, no one is excluded. Buddhism, Islam, all other faiths are recognized as equal partners.
Their motto: Let go and let God

Another church, and the one I will probably return to when I once again relocate to Florida {yes, I plan to return permanently} is the Unitarian/Universalist churches. They are as open and accepting of all faiths, lifestyles, spiritual concepts as it gets. No one spiritual doctrine, no sole focus on the Christian myth. Most who attend are 'humanists' devoted to the souls of all faiths, people, religion. They subscribe to nature as the spiritual center {as I do}. I recommend anyone who is searching for a spiritual church home look at the Unitarian church {UU}. Always a great spiritual environment.

gerard/Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 58 Murfreesboro, Tn

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