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Snow bound with friends

Hi Jerry and Kristi,

I spent time on the forum this morning, following another dream I think is important. And I want to express my gratitude and appreciation for the work you are doing here. Since initially writing you back in August, there has been a shift in my unconscious which is revealed in this morning's dream. I look forward to your responses.

Gratitude and blessings to you both.

SNOW BOUND WITH A FRIEND

I'm in a big pickup (very much like the truck my son drives) with a young man who I don't know but (I think) is my son or like my son. I am pulling a trailer load of Joe's stuff (Joe is one of my grad school mentors and still a good friend) to his cabin which in near Salt Lake City (where I met Joe). I get to his cabin and discover the trailer is gone. I spend the day at the cabin - having fun with Joe and his family - kids and grandkids. Joe gets news that there are 40 feet of snow on the road back to my place (I think the place is Klamath Falls, OR - where I was born and lived till I left for college - but the exact location is vague in the dream) and invites me to stay over at the cabin. Joe and his wife are celebrating an anniversary or something related to family - maybe Christmas - and all his kids/grand kids have many presents for them. I stay and enjoy time with all of them.

I wake feeling a vague relief and then listen to my self talk expressing lots of anger toward my son who has been rude, hostile and nasty during a recent visit to Powell and left full of anger. A very sour conclusion to a visit that could have been good. Now 6 hours after waking I am feeling some release from the mild depression and sadness I've felt for the past several days - sadness about my relationship with my son and some of the shadow thoughts I am beginning to express in my self talk. Sadness about how much stuff I have been "stuffing" related to my parents and now my son. And feeling released from some of my need to "stuff". There have been more days of sadness about family and isolation since. I get through and past these and back to my live usually in a day or two.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 & Powell, WY.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

Re: Snow bound with friends

The truck, big and able to pull heavy loads, is most likely metaphor for your present attitude toward your son and your own past. Pulling Joe's 'stuff', which you describe in the dream as a fun time with family and friend, probably represents your own desire for such a relationship. The trailer is gone, the good times with Joe {which would represent a positive aspect of your own psyche} being a retrieve of the negative energies you have experienced the past several days with your son. The 40 ft of snow {4 is the number for wholeness in Jungian psyche} is a barrier to your wholeness {back to your place}. Your deepest desire is to 'stay over' into Joe's world {with his family representing your own wishful relationships with family}. The Christmas celebration may be due to the upcoming holiday season, a time when family is most important. You may consider Joe as much family as your true siblings.

Your narrative about waking emotions may play a big role in how to look at the dream. Although the past several days have had a lot of negative energies, the dreams is mostly positive. The mild depression and isolation from family is tempered by a positive attitude you must possess. 'Getting through and past' these negative emotions requires such positive thinking. The wishful thinking of enjoyment with Joe's family not only requires a positive outlook when it comes to your family relationships, it may be telling you where to look for some comfort in the lonely days that often come with the holiday season. Friends if not family.

I can emphasize with your position in life. Although my son and I have a good relationship it is still difficult not having the family atmosphere we once enjoyed. Two things have depleted those happy times. One is the passing of his mother, Susie in 2003 {my ex-wife whom I had a great relationship even after being divorced since 1983}. My son, his wife, myself, his oldest son, even my mother and Susie's mother would gather at Susie's home {she also had a live in partner who fit in well} for Christmas. A weird situation for some but an extended family for someone like myself who has lived alone since 1993.

The second is his moving to Orlando this past Christmas {Dec 26}. Although his oldest son still lives close, my two youngest grandchildren are with him. There is nothing in life I love more than my grandchildren. I doubt if I will be able to enjoy the upcoming holidays with them and that will make for a sad Christmas. That is the one of the sad part of the upcoming holidays.

But strength endures in the souls of positive thinkers/believers. I sense your dream is addressing your positive strengths. The loneliness never goes away but experience in life does help calm the emotions. Close friends can be a good substitute.

And as for 'stuff'. I have lived a simple life ever since 1993 and could have made a lot more income if not for my desire to 'follow my bliss' {my dream work and Myths-Dreams-Symbols website}. At Christmas the emphasis is so much on 'stuff', materials things, I often feel bad I can't provide more for the family. Of course that is tempered by the fact the grandchildren always get more than they need at Christmas. But your emphasis on 'stuff' leaves an impression much like my own. It just isn't that important.

The dream seems to be emphasising the positive. Even with a strong will it is still difficult being without family. 'We' have to gather the strength once again to get through these times. That comes with experience, something that should be a part of who we are as we age. And something I believe your dream is trying to communicate to you, your positive attitude during the negative times.

Do you have any creative endeavors, a 'bliss' in your life?

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 59 Murfreesboro, Tn

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

Re: Snow bound with friends

Hi Ken,

Just popped into the forum and saw your post. I will try to respond with my thoughts by tomorrow.

Best,
Kristi

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 43, Kansas

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

Re: Snow bound with friends

Hello again, Ken. I just read your dream and Jerry's response and find there is nothing I would add, except that you are obviously doing a lot of housecleaning. Kudos to you! And how refreshing/healing for the soul. How wonderful that you would have such a positive dream of Joe and family closeness (which is also an aspect of you) at the same time you were airing negative feelings. Very balancing!

Best,
Kristi

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 43, Kansas

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes

Re: Snow bound with friends

Thanks for your thoughts and personal notes Jerry. Christmas has (probably) always been a challenging time for me. I recall as a child, almost every Christmas, getting sick. For a long time my parents speculated the illness was an allergic reaction to the fir tree we put up. I suspect now as an adult there was an emotional drama operating in my family that we couldn't acknowledge and didn't recognize. I have not during any of the Christmas celebrations since leaving my parent's home, put together a way of celebrating that would satisfy. I have consistently avoided or been absent for Christmas holidays. Or when there was a wife in my life to celebrate with - I recall consistent unpleasant times. I almost said disasters.

Your example as a man who struggles with distant family connections and wishes for closer geography with family - especially grandkids resonates with me. Geographic and emotional distance is painful. And the two are often related regardless of the nature or quality of the relationship.

I still miss some times/activities with my first wife ... we divorced in 1977 and I have a truck load ... hhmmm a big truck load and maybe a trailer full of ... unresolved painful emotional stuff with her. It just occurred, in my last dream, when I got to the happy family gathering at Joe's cabin, the trailer, truck and young man who was kinda like my son and riding with me to the cabin, were gone. They did not appear in the dream again. Which I think is important.

I have been letting go of my hope for a close relationship with my son and his family for the past two years. The past couple weeks I have let go of more than I thought possible. I am moving toward relationships with friends that are more fulfilling. Learning to hold my son and his family with love and compassion and keep my distance is a very tricky balance for me.

He and his wife lead a very different life style than I do and they are raising my grandson in ways that really frighten me. These are issues that we cannot talk about. So time with them is tense and not often happy. My son has suggested violence toward me on a two or three occasions and his recent visit here ended with an angry push which knocked me over. He later called and said "I don't know why I did that dad" which was as close to an apology as I think I'll get.

As I write this I am feeling a deep sadness and reluctance to let go of my dream of a close family. There is no evidence this will happen in the time I have left on this earth. I have given it all I know how to give and it is not enough to make a difference. OUCH.

Thanks again for you insight, for providing this forum and you good counsel. You and Kristi have been a big part of my growth.

Blessings,

Ken

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 & Powell, WY.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes

Re: Snow bound with friends

One more thing. I do like the creative outlet of photography and put some energy into photo projects. When I am involved with my emotional struggles with family I find the energy for almost all else wains. I would like to be a successful photographer. I don't like the work necessary to become a successful photographer. So I make images that are appreciated by a few close to me and find that is enough. If you are interested you can see some of my photo work at .... http://backroadzimages.com/BackroadzImages/Home.html or go to the flickr site that is mentioned on the web page.

Ken

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 & Powell, WY.

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? yes


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