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I'm looking for my new house

I dreamt [2 weeks ago] that my husband [keith] and I had bought an apartment. The apartemnt was in a kind of old building, like a station of some kind trains/buses/aeroplanes, a place where there was lots of people coming and going. The apartments were up above where you had to get a lift, quite a large place with lots going on, fork lift trucks were moving things into lifts. The place was cold, old grey and dingy looking. Keith [my husband] had erected a wall fountain which was meant to pour out and go back up to come out of the fountain again, but it was just pouring water all over the floor creating a puddle [I had the feeling in the dream that he was trying to make things nice in the greyness and misery of the dark underground place. The dream changed like it was the beginning again, and keith and I were lost and looking for where we lived, we asked several people who either knew and directed us, and some who didn't know. Eventually we found the building. We walked up wide stone stairs, and entered large doors that had some kind of deep engraved and embossed carvings on them, we then went up the inner stairs to the apartment. Keith then said "this is the way, I've remembered you have to go down D corridor. The number to the apartment was something like 41/42/51/49?!!. The apartment was light and airy and felt nice.
At this point in the dream I was back in my own house, one of my sisters was in the house visiting, and then one of my female friends ann [of 25 years]came for a visit, I was so pleased and happy to see her, I gave her a big cuddle and told her "I'm so pleased to see you" [I haven't seen her in ages]. Just then another female friend marg' of the same length of time, came to visit and was talking to my husband in the hallway, and then they stepped outside. I went to see what they were doing, and my friend was looking at a plant that was growing from under and up the fence near the front door and to the left side of my house, I had not noticed this plant before, but it had big green leaves and beautiful deep pink flowers on it. Marg' told me she wanted to take the plant, I was looking at the plant and thinking how lovely it was and that she can't have it, marg' then said "half of it will do" so I replied "yeah, that's fine". Next moment, I was leaving to help her carry the plant to her car, I shouted to my friend ann in the house that I would only be a moment in helping marg' carry the plant to her car. We seemed to be walking for ages, and as we were walking the dream changed so that we were then walking away from the underground building where the water was pouring, and I said to marg' "ask steve [her husband] what the problem might be" [marg had told me the previous week of problems she was having with her husband], marg' replied "you're pouring water out, it's not doing anything".
Next I was lost in a city with old buildings somewhere, it had been raining and I had my bottle green mac on, there was lots of people hustling around me going to and from their business, they also had macs on. I couldn't find where I lived, I walked up streets and streets trying to find and remember where I lived, but I couldn't find anything that was familiar, or anything I recognised. Everytime I thought I saw the doors, I would go in only to find out that it wasn't where my apartment was. I was beginning to become quite distressed, and began asking people where I lived, but they didn't know. I went up an escalator and tripped nearly falling backwards, a dark skinned man behind me pushed me upright saving me from falling, I thanked him and he replied with a grunt, shake of the head and a sigh. I then went into a shop, where I recognised a womans face behind a counter, there was another 2 females working nearby. I told the woman whom I'd recognised [I don't know who she was though] that I was lost and started to cry, she was nice and said "let me help, I'll see what I can do". She asked me did I have anything with my name on and I told her I only had my debit card, she said she would see if she could find anything with that. As she was looking I was crying and telling her that it's horrible to forget where you live and not be able to find it. I told her that I had said to my friend that I would only be a moment, and she was waiting in the house and I had only gone and disappeared, she'll be wondering what's taking so long, and she had only just come. The woman gave me a folded blue paper towel with my card inside, I noticed she had written where I lived with directions how to get to it. I thanked her and went outside. I walked up the street following the directions on the paper. I noticed I was carrying something grey, it looked like the inside reel for a water hose to wrap around. I walked on and noticed 2 large apartment buildings with wide doors. I was about to go in one when a man said to me "I think it's that one you're looking for [pointing to the other one], that's cheaper", I don't know if he was referring the cost to the one I was going into or the other one. I said to him with a smile that I was lost and only look posh?!! I went in nad just by looking around I knew it wasn't the building I was looking for.
Just then I was back inside the shop where the woman had helped me, the other 2 women were still there. They sat me down and listened to me telling them that I was lost, and how horrible it is to be lost and not even know where you live, and this is how it must feel like to the old people who want to go home and get upset because they don't remember who they are. I was crying and wiping my eyes and the women were silent and listening, and then I said "this is how it feels to the old people, and until I've experienced how it feels, then I will never understand how they feel, I have to experience it to understand it". The 3 women smiled and nodded their heads, and the woman who had helped me said "yes, you have to experience it to understand it". I looked at my son paul [who was a child in the dream and is actually 32 now, and who had only just appeared beside me] and said "lets go home", I took his hand and walked away from the chair, I knocked against something on the table which fell to the floor, it spun round and round like a spinning top, and then stopped. The woman said "it's only the sugar". I picked it up and noticed the sugar was pink, and still in the bowl, and said "well, here's your sugar" and we all laughed. I then said to paul "become, let's go home". Walking up the road I saw the wide stone steps that I recognised, at the top of the stairs were the 2 wide doors, and the deep and embossed carvings which my husband and I had saw first time round but didn't 'see' at that time, were a Dragons face.


I had the feeling on awakening that this was a good dream, because I woke up feeling better than I had all of that week. I think I understand the part about the elderly due to working in a nursing home where some of the elderly suffer from forms of dementia. I don't understand the Dragons face though, or the complete distressed and helpless feeling of being lost finding an apartment that I wouldn't want or live in, or the water pouring into a puddle, or my friend wanting the plant .... I do love dreams though and always try to analyse them myself ... I hope that you can help me understand this dream .. Thank you :o) xx

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 56 .. England, Britain

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Shirley,
I'll give a deeper look into your dream Saturday. But a cursory inspection may suggest you are looking for a new self or new life. It may be one particular aspect that needs changing.
The old life would be one that is 'cold, old grey and dingy looking'. There may be some 'recurring' issues that may make/require you want to make changes in your life. Your life, as depicted in the dream, seems to be a busy one, possibly suggesting a lot of responsibilities.

The 'good feelings' when you awoke may be the affects of the dream as it attempts to help you resolve the emotional issues in your life. Apartments, compared to the whole house or building {both of which would represent your whole self} may suggest the dream is addressing one particular aspect in your life you wish/need to change.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 61 Murfreesboro, Tn. USA

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Thank you Jerry for replying to my post re: my dream. I do understand what you are saying about changing an aspect of my life, sometimes I feel that I get put upon by certain people, and I do feel that I have a lot of responsibilities. I want to be able to say "I can't/won't do this" :o) ... I do feel lost in myself re: work, I've done caring for 24yrs, but it's too much for me now, I would love to do something easier .... moans out the way now :o) ... Thank you for taking the time to read and reply Jerry, I look forward to reading the summary of the whole dream, especially about the Dragon engraving on the doors, and the specific numbers and colours .. :o) x

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 56 .. England, Britain

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Shirley,
The dream does seem to be addressing the pressures you feel from life. The relationship with your husband seems to be an issue, possibly related to the same issues Marg is having with her husband. The 'pouring water' would likely have to do with 'pouring emotions', your emotions, and no one seems to notice or care. The plant that Marg likes and wants probably relates to similar experiences the two of you share that is growing {the issues with her husband?}. You may want to examine what related experiences you share with your sister and Ann to see where that leads {both Marg and Ann share the 25 years time frame in the dream}. Because Marg and Ann are not current relationships they would possess aspects that would fit you/your life. These shared issues have been 'going on for ages', those issues related to you. There does seem to be elements in your search related to the past, the 25 years and your son as a child being possible links.

My sense is the dream is addressing the many stresses from your responsibilities. The long prose has specific symbolic representations that have to do with those different pressures. But the primary focus seems to have to do with your husband. The 'second time around', what could that represent in the relationship? The 25 year time frame and your son as a child could be clues. Were there experiences from that time period that would relate to more recent experiences? Suspicions perhaps?

The Dragon in this instance may represent unconscious aspects tat threaten you {in myth dragons are dangerous and threatening creatures that live in dark caves which would represent emotional issues within the deep unconscious}. My sense is these unconscious fears that have to do more with your husband and that relationship is complicated due to the other stressful issues in your life.

The numbers, 41, 42, 51, 49 are progressive, then regressive. This may represent a particular issue in your life that was progressive but reverts to regressive. The 25 year time frame may relate to this regression. A time when your now grown son was a child.

The 2s and 3s could be symbolic of conflicts in your life {2 often represents conflict, 1 against 1}. In Jungian psyche the number 3 is one short of wholeness {4 representing wholeness, a balanced, harmonious life}. These emotional issues that play on your mind is keeping you from being the whole person you wish to be.

Examine the relationship with your husband. Are there issues there, similar to Marg? Go back 25 years and see what may be similar experiences to the present. What issues then may relate to today. I do feel there is a relationship to that time period and the emotional issues you are experiencing in the present time.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 61 Murfreesboro, Tn. USA

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Thank you Jerry for giving me such an indepth reply to my dream. Reading back over my dream after reading your reply, I did notice that there are several mentions to time of '25yrs', which I never noticed while writing it. My husband and I have recently celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary [we got married when our son was reaching his 7th birthday, which now I come to realise that in almost all of my dreams where our son appears he is approx' that age!!], and although there have been stressful times, firstly within the first several years of our being together when I would have walked away from it all, and then again about a year ago when the same old problems were recurring [yes Jerry, the same problems as my friend marg' is having with her husband], thankfully the problem is now resolved, or I sincerely hope it is, this time resolved for good!!
I have lost a lot of trust in people, and I know that no-one truly sees me as me, I have just always been!!. I can't abide anyone lying to me, so everything in my life that has hurt, and does hurt me stays deep within my mind, and I guess the only outlet my thoughts have is to surface in my dreams!!
I also feel a lot of guilt about going on holidays recently, in regards to our son. We never went on holidays when he was growing up, although we did do a lot of going places. My husband was in the merchant navy for 24yrs, and travelled the world, so he never wanted to go away on holiday, which I did understand, but this last while it keeps playing in my mind that my husband was being selfish because it meant that our son and myself never got to go either, and our son missed out on wonderful things to see through the eyes of a child .. that saddens me.
I feel that I can't let go and be a whole person Jerry, I want to be, but everytime I feel happy and made up about something I start reflecting on what should have been and wasn't. I know I cannot change the past, so why do I keep reflecting on it rather than totally enjoy what I have now??!!
I think on deeper reflection that, I am my own problem, so therefore, I am my own solution!!
Thank you so much for replying, and opening my mind to the solutions in dreams .. I really appreciate it .. Yes, I understand the dream now .. Thank you Jerry :o) x

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 56 England, Britain

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

P.S Jerry .... I meant to mention about the Dragon engravings on the doors, and my perspective on Dragons :o) ......... I personally don't see Dragons as something to be feared, I see them as a spiritual aspect in a mythical light, breathing the fire of life, protectors in their own right. The doors were large and wide, out in the open, so to me they were inviting me in, a clear walk through, clear of obstruction. I got the feeling from them, although I know I did wake up before entering, but I got the feeling that I would be entering something spiritual, that once I entered them, there would be no looking back!!!! ..... I will think about the Dragon engravings a lot more, perhaps they are telling me to be "As a Dragon" and breathe a bit more fire, instead of being so put upon .. who knows eh? ... Thank you once again Jerry :o) x

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 56 England, Britain

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Shirley,
Thanks for the response. It really means a lot. It has stimulated my brain and since it is a Sunday and I do not have other responsibilities demanding my time {during the week I have my job that is mentally demanding, and taxing} I can provide some 'deeper thinking' about your dream and the dream in general. I ask your indulgence in my long response. It is not often I get the time to provide such detailed thoughts. Something I hope to remedy within time.

Every dream has a correct interpretation and the importance of understanding the possible meaning of the symbols is the greatest task to a proper interpretation. Jung's approach to the dream world is controversial to some but with responses like yours confirming the observations to the dream only verify his philosophies. Through the years I have seen such confirmations time and again and these leave no doubt Jung 'got it right' when it comes to understand the dream and the unconscious.

Comments on Dream Interpretation and Long Dream Narratives

The numbers in your dream are important to understand not only because the dream experiences do correspond with events/experiences in your waking life but they are also another example of a proper approach to interpreting dreams. There are few instances where one can pen a dream, get an interpretation and then get a response to that interpretation. That is one of the great things about the Dream Forum, being able to confirm or deny the interpretation.

Then there is the inclusion of two friends of 25 years {Ann and Marg}. This is standard fair for dreams, using known people as examples who share experiences/characteristics that relate to your own emotional conflicts. I say standard fair because it is pretty much a standard to interpret such symbols in this way. Numbers often fit this same pattern although they differ in they will be used in different contexts {instead of 25 being a number that denotes an actual time frame, there would be a need to add the numbers together to get their meaning, 2 + 5 = 7}. In your case the time frame fit the flow of the dream. I'll address the other numbers later in my post.

The other great thing about the Dream Forum is I get to help others better understand their dreams, and in the process themselves. I feel this is my true calling in life and have been fortunate to have had the turn of events over the past 18 years lead me to this place in time. Hopefully within the next year and a half, when I plan to take early retirement, I will be able to put all my energies toward my dream work. It is the interaction with those like yourself I receive the enjoyment from working with the dream world. Thanks again for the response and being open to your life.

Long dreams can be hard to interpret but it is important to understand how such dreams function. The experience in working with your dream has provided new insights to long narrative dreams. One aspect I feel it provides is the insights to the personality of the dreamer, the indepth narrative saying a lot about how your psyche functions. There is still a lot to be understood about such type dreams, something that probably would require face to face analyzing and a better understanding of your life, but with each discovery {and I am speaking to my understanding of the dream} we can get closer to better interpretations of the dream. All in all from what I can gather there is not a lot of difference in a long narrative dream compared to a shorter dream. Both address the true conditions of the emotional life of the dreamer. One aspect about your long narrative is that when interpreting the symbols there should be a close look at the relationship to the other symbols with the need to determine whether they support the prime intent of the whole dream. In your dream there is a natural flow of events which suggest to me a natural flow of events in your waking life. In other words this dream is not going in one direction and then another, making confusion statements that would contradict the other symbolic representations within the dream. I would think if such a case should occur, contradictory dream symbols, it would be saying something about the dreamer's personality and psyche. Such contradictory dream symbols may be a telling statement about an unbalanced psyche and personality. And although you may feel you are in an 'unbalanced' state at times, your dreams suggest you are as balanced as any normal person. Dreams do not lie. Understanding the symbols brings about truths about the dreamer and for the dreamer to realize those truths is why there is a need to interpret our dreams.


Your Dream and Response

In your response you spoke of the spousal problems early in your marriage and the 'same old problems recurring'. I sensed as much, as an overall experience, and I see that emotional experience in the dream statement 'Keith [my husband] had erected a wall fountain which was meant to pour out and go back up to come out of the fountain again, but it was just pouring water all over the floor creating a puddle [I had the feeling in the dream that he was trying to make things nice in the greyness and misery of the dark underground place'. The inclusion of Marg in the dream, which in such cases where other people are within a dream it points to similar shared experiences with that person, is meant to support the emotional stress still felt about the relationship. She is of the same age with similar martial problems. The 'cuddle' is the dream 'cuddling' the shared experiences, an attempt to point to the underlying emotional issues you have/had with our Keith. I dare say the sister image could being a 'sister' in a similar conflict but would not discount an actual shared experience with your true sister {this is another case where the dream will use an image to address more than one issue or experience}. Ann would also fit in this proposition of shared experiences. If not martial some other shared experience. The 25 years denotation may also be saying something about the early relationship with these two women, both being relationships of 25 years duration.

The Plant

Here it seems there is a diversion from the 'pure' subject of husbands and troubled relationships. This is addressing something that is growing, normally denoting a positive aspect. At first I took this as something speaking to a possible growing relationship between Marge and your husband but soon dismissed that possibility since it was a dream scene and not an actual waking life experience {unless Marg has in fact re-entered Shirley your waking life and there is something to that}. That left the plant to be symbolic of something else, something that has potential for growth or is growing. It could be in relationship with the shared husband conflicts {if we should determine if Ann is having the same shared experiences}. My sense is it has to do with the 'you're pouring water out, it's not doing anything'. Pouring the water would likely being 'pouring of the emotions' something you feel no one seems to care about in your immediate relationships. Although there is a negative connotation to this, the positive aspect would be you are 'letting these things out', not bottling them up and let them become even stronger and doing more emotional harm. One example of the positive instance that provides healing is the fact you have posted your dream for interpretation. You are seeking personal growth in positive ways and not letting the negatives control your intents. This could also be interpreted as a ' spiritual' aspect because you are looking for the positive, the higher ground, a spiritual endeavor related to the higher self. This is one aspect on your life that has potential to grow, the spiritual.
But that poses the question whether Marg and Ann have similar shared experiences in some form to this positive growth. Something to consider.

Lost in the City

One constant in dreams is that houses, buildings, autos, and even cities are metaphors for the dreamer. Being lost in the city would in one context represent 'being lost within yourself'. That usually denotes a search, most often an inner search { a common experience during the mid-life years of 40-65}. And often this involves a spiritual search taking note of your comment in your added response, 'I see them {dragons}as a spiritual aspect in a mythical light'}. The whole context of this part of the dream seems to be addressing an inner search, while although prompted by outside waking life experiences, involves something deeper. I won't break the whole of this part of the dream but will address some of what I think relevant to the search. This part does seem to be addressing something more than just the emotional conflicts having to do with husbands {,font color="#00aaee">although in a lesser context it would}.

There is something not familiar in this part, that being something unfamiliar about yourself. Note the comment on the 'doors', and your observations about Dragons on the doors and the positive spiritual context you hold them in. Another reference that may also denote positive aspects was you had your 'green mac on', I take to be eyeshadow which applies to the eyes, or 'seeing'. The others with green mac may be representative of your whole self and/or to other people you have associated with who are instrumental in positive aspects. Again, Marg and Ann were involved in the dream experience with the plant with the 'green leaves and beautiful deep pink flowers'.
In this part of the dream there are elements of self help, doing those things necessary to help yourself through the emotional conflicts in your life. This could be references to the inner search. The unknown woman you recognized but did not know would be yourself, unknown/unrecognized aspects about yourself. You are trying to find, discover, your true self, that being the inner search which usually involves a spiritual identity. In this dream search you are looking through many doors, and not finding fit. The dark skinned man probably fits with any negative attitudes you have toward your husband. You do not have an identity that fits. Nothing seems to fit {fitting with the emotions of your waking life?}. The rest of this paragraph should be taken as a dialog with yourself. Look at it in that context and I believe it will begin to make sense.

It shouldn't go unnoticed the two friends are also a part of this dream. These could be references to Ann and Marg and/or to aspects of yourself {a rule of thumb is unknown people usually represent aspects of yourself, a man in your dreams symbolic of masculine aspects} within your psyche. The man pointing to the door would be a masculine aspect. Noting the distrust you spoke of in your response there may be elements of distrusting masculine aspects, literally in your waking life, and figuratively within your psyche. These 'masculine' aspects seek the 'cheaper', possibly representing 'inadequate' parts in your life. This is not the door you wish to go through. In Jungian psyche, and in my philosophy in life, it is the feminine aspects that are superior. The spiritual, creative aspects are feminine. Intuitiveness is a superior aspect. Trust your instincts, those intuitive feelings that first come up, before you give time to thinking about them. They are never wrong when you learn to do this. NEVER!
I will note that Jesus lived from the feminine aspects, loving caring, giving, etc. On the other hand God possessed more masculine traits. This realization helped shape my spiritual philosophy.

Continuing to shop.
Note, it is a woman who helps you. And the other two women are there also. The women listen. Men often don't. One aspect of this last part of the dream, a climax to the whole of the dream.
This how it feels to be old. "this is how it feels to the old people, and until I've experienced how it feels, then I will never understand how they feel, I have to experience it to understand it".
Mid-life issues, at the age of 56? Mid-life, when the inner search takes place. And the feminine quality of emotions.

The three women. In Western philosophy this is the trinity which represents wholeness, a desire for spiritual as well as conscious wholeness. And the three of 'you', sharing experiences with Ann and Marg {we must learn the shared experiences with Ann}. Again the dream using the same images to address different aspects in your life.

Culmination . What is important in your life, at this particular time in life? Your son, who again appears by your side. This Is the 'sugar' in your life, still in your life {bowl}, even before you met your husband.

The stone steps, the concrete foundations you need to take to find 'yourself', the path/road your 'inner self' recognizes that you should take.

The two doors. The 'deep' unconscious recognition, embossed carvings of the Dragon's face {I see them as a spiritual aspect in a mythical light....which is how the dragon is seen in Eastern philosophies}. This was the path you envisioned at first with your husband. But at the time you did not see the changes through time, things change, he has changed, the trust in the masculine has changed.

"I had the feeling on awakening that this was a good dream, because I woke up feeling better than I had all of that week".
I can see why you felt this way when you awoke {waking feelings should be considered in the interpretation of the dream}. If you will take heed of the message, look to the spiritual aspect, look within yourself for the courage you need to overcome the conflicts in your life, then the recognition of the 'Dragon's face' will be a positive aspect in your life. All indications are you have begun to do this. Future dreams will reveal your progress.

Numbers in a Dream

We have established the link between the 25 year notation in your dream and the waking life 25th anniversary marriage. The 41/42/51/49?!!. I believe to be the progression/regression, looking forward then looking back, of the mid-life issues. The two known women, plus yourself. Also the 3 aspects of life, physical/psychological/metaphysical. Your son at the age of 32, 3 and 2 fitting the previous sentence and perhaps more {3 + 2=5 which represent changes}. Or even 32, reflection, reversed, + 23=56, your age. Dreams have a funny way with numbers. Some are very relevant, others not. All should be examined for their importance to the dream, and the dreamer's life.

I haven't gone over my full response looking for improper grammar and speech. I do use spell check so not to look too foolish with my words. If you have any questions on any part feel free to ask. A response to any degree would be appreciated. The hope is you discover answers to your search. I do sense you possess a strength that will lead you down the right path, an intuitive sense as well as from the dream itself.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 61 Murfreesboro, Tn. USA

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

2nd attempt at posting this reply .. I wrote a lengthy answer [took me an hour LoL], but for some reason when I tried to post it, my computor decided to 'time me out'!! I've just looked to see if by any chance it did post, but alas not ... oh well [there are reasons for everything] :o) ...
Aww Jerry, thankyou for looking at my dream again in your leisure time, it is greatly appreciated. I know how busy and taxing on ones energy a working week can be, so thank you :o) ... I have always believed in the power of dreams, and I know that they can be great problem solvers, and that if we could all only learn how to interpret them [as you have done], what an amazing life we could all have.
A little bit about me :o) ... In the last 7yrs, I have felt that I am not the person I want to be or used to be, I have changed, and feel like I am on this downward spiral, trying to get hold of something/anything that will stop me from continuing on this negative journey, and let me get back to where I used to be, someone who looks to the positive in everything, like I used to.
I am going to re-read your reply and answer it later tonight, as one of my dutiful daughter jobs is to help my mum bath on a monday night :o) .. I feel that I have seen where the importance of my friend Ann has come into the dream, and I want to tell you about it ... So, until later Jerry :o) x

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 56. England, Britain

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Shirley,
I know the 'emotions'. I taken to opening Wordpad and using that program to write my posts due to the many times I have spend time putting thought to a reply and.....bamm, I lose it. You talk about being mad. It reminds me of the Joseph Campbell/Bill Moyers/The Power of Myth conversation where Campbell talks about being frustrated with his new computer because it seemingly having a 'mind of its own'.

I do look forward to your reply. Do give it plenty of thought and when you have the time post your feelings/impressions/thoughts. I've taken to trying to better understand prevalent patterns within dreams and your relationship with Ann and Marg {in the dream that fits with the waking life} and the 'named' 25 year time span seem to be one discernible pattern in a lot of dreams. Much like when there is an image of a child or adolescent {especially when they are unnamed} in the first part of a dream {the exposition....initial situation {setting} pointing to a central conflict expressed in the dream} turning out to be about the dreamer as a child and an emotional conflict occurring during that time frame. Of course the language accompanying the image is in symbol and the metaphorical reference of that is what has to be interpreted/understood. Possessing this knowledge of such recurring patterns allows a much more 'legitimate' interpretation. And even more important it allows the dreamer to better understand the emotional conflict the dream is wishing to expose.

Whoops! Let me stop for a moment and backup this post in Wordpad. MY computer is acting silly again.

As for your 'downward spiral'. Think of your life as a story, your personal myth, and look to fable/myth/fairytale/story to help you understand the possible 'paths' to 'resurrection'. All stories have patterns of behavior and reading/seeing these patterns in 'story tales' helps us connect those to our personal lives. These are the 'universal' stories, depicting discernible patterns of behavior of which one or more will match any individual person/life. There is a hero/heroine and a villain in every tale. Your dream is about your tale, your myth, the story of your life. The unfolding patterns in these stories will often match or have similarities to the unfolding emotional conflicts in the personal life. Distinct 'universal patterns' or images/symbols {Jung's archetypes} will often come about in dreams during major changes in the person's life. Mid-life is most often the stage of life for these these 'life changing' events due to the fact at mid-life we are 'naturally' undergoing physical as well as psychological changes. What is true on the inside is true on the outside. The hero journey is about the inner journey, psychological and with the many aspects that make up the human psyche.

The one constant in the hero's/heroine journey of mythology is the search for the 'true self'. Often this true self is rooted in the spiritual and/or creative aspects. But getting past the emotional barriers that block the institution of these qualities {the creative aspect is actually an aspect of the spiritual in that a person is giving of oneself when engaged in the muses, or 'giving of oneself' to benefit the other}.

Discovering and a an identification with the 'true self' is the primary focus and theme of Jung's Individuation Process. And a reason why we have dreams, its therapeutic function of helping the conscious mind realize/resolve emotional conflicts which are stored within the unconscious.


How to get past the emotional conflicts, the 'dragons' in life. Identifying/realizing the conflict is the first step to resolution. Most often we can find the underlying foundations to be from childhood experiences/influences. These experiences/influences accompany the dreamer throughout life and often have a unconscious influence how the person lives their life. The 'void' we come to feel in life very often can be traced to early life and/or traumatic emotional experiences, such experiences possessing emotional energy that is 'imprinted' in the mind. Navigating your way through those issues and resolving what can be resolved often leads to answers. The downward spiral you feel in your life has reasons. 'Medications' can help in many instances but until the 'original' conflict is resolved it will likely 'retain' its 'psyche energy', and its control, and will come up regularly in our dreams. Interpreting the images as well as patterns in dreams can lead to the identification of the conflicts as well as their roots. Jung's 'Individuation Process is a 'self help' method to wholeness {and my path to filling the void that had an unconscious control over my life until I was into my early 40s}. More often it requires psychological counseling to work through the conflicts.

What I hope we can do in interpreting your dreams is to help point you in a positive direction that will ultimately lead you to your own 'individuation'. If you can come away with some sense of direction, better understanding why you feel there is this 'downward spiral' and perhaps identifying the foundations of these emotions, you may be able fill those voids, overcome the 'downward spiral', right the ship and be that person your soul seeks to be. By consciously engaging that hero journey you become the heroine, self savior {requiring a lot of self discipline}. This is the hero path in a nutshell.

A first step was when you posted your dream. You have already learned something about yourself from our conversation. What more will be learned may be found in the images of Ann. Bringing up what has been unconscious to a conscious level, that brings about new knowledge. Such knowledge can let you be that person you truly wish/need to be. It is why it is called the 'true self'.

Jerry

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Hi again Jerry ... To tell of the shared experiences Ann and I have, I go back 14yrs. Ann, Marg' and myself have known each other for 25yrs [well it will be 25yrs this coming october], due to working the same E.M.D Home together. In 1997, Ann and I witnessed the owner of the home physically abusing an elderly female resident, we wrote a statement re: the incident, and processed it through the appropriate procedure. Ann and I were dismissed by the owner 2 days after the incident as he needed us to work the weekend shift [something we found out later], and we went through 18 months of Social Services Court hearings as witnesses to the incident. I was fortunate to be employed immediately by the social services working in the community, Ann however went into a depression, she needed me at that time, and I was always there for her. 5 months later Ann was able to start working on the community too, but she had become quieter and withdrawn. About 5yrs ago, Ann decided that she wanted to ease her friendship and visits with me as I reminded her of the traumatic time we went through together, she couldn't stop talking about it, she was becoming obsessed with what happened. I understood her feelings because I knew she was under a lot of stress with her husband, who had developed a form of arthritis shortly after the court case had ended [the home got closed down, and the residents were moved to neighbouring homes, we both felt guilty about this, but Ann couldn't shut out the long term feelings of guilt, whereas I accepted it as an inevitable occurence - It was the only way I could deal with it all eg everything happens for a reason], and she was tired by it all. I miss her, and usually when Ann appears in my dream, it is normally when some emotional conflict, or stressful situation re: work is going on in my head. So yes, we have shared an emotional experience which made us very close to each other, Marg' was a tremendous support to us both. Marg' and I are both private people, and there is only so much about our marital conflicts that we tell each other, but we both know each other too, words aren't always necessary with us!! So yes Jerry, there is a strong connection re: emotional experiences.
My sister who is in the dream is going through marital difficulties, so yes, again there is shared experiences between us.
At this present time I don't feel any difficulties in my relationship re: my husband, I feel the difficulties are with me personally and my work. I feel frustrated with myself. I feel that I am just a number in a workforce. 7yrs ago, I started to become tired in everything I did, and then it was discovered that I had an underactive thyroid, so now I have to be on a tablet daily for the rest of my life, which I hate. I was the person that believed in the power of the mind ;o) .. I am tired all the time, and now that I have become tired, my husband wants to do holidays and go here, there, and everywhere. I believe it's to do with him thinking as I said in the dream "I had the feeling that he was trying to make things nice in the greyness and misery of the dark underground place" .. I think I am the grey and dark underground place Jerry, and I am trying to get out of it.
I realise by your interpretation of my dream, that I 'think' I already knew what the dream meant but also, I needed it confirming to me. Yes, I am happy/overjoyed that everything is going well for my husband and I, and I love the fact that we are going on holidays now, but deep inside me I still fear that everything good doesn't last, and there will be a recurreence of past problems, and it frightens me that I cannot trust him totally!! It frightens me that I cannot trust anyone totally anymore, because a lot of my trust in people has been abused .. it's sad to be like that.
I am looking for myself Jerry, and I will find myself, but I don't think it will the very confident person that I used to be, the person I loved to be, the person that no-one would even dream about using or treating 'just as a number' ... I believe in using my intincts and my intuition, I have always used those aspects of ME that I still own and are mine to keep .. it's just everything else about me that everyone wants and feels free to take when they want to ...
And yes, my son is 'the sugar' in my life, and he is so much like me when I was ME :o) We are both spirtual thinkers, we have good conversations about the philosophy of life, and we are very close, whereas my husband prefers the television :o)
Anyway Jerry, thank you once again for giving my dream so much of your free time and attention, and
making it clear to me that the only way is forward and up ... So, into the Dragon Doors here I go .. Thank you :o) x

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Hi again Jerry ... To tell of the shared experiences Ann and I have, I go back 14yrs. Ann, Marg' and myself have known each other for 25yrs [well it will be 25yrs this coming october], due to working the same E.M.D Home together. In 1997, Ann and I witnessed the owner of the home physically abusing an elderly female resident, we wrote a statement re: the incident, and processed it through the appropriate procedure. Ann and I were dismissed by the owner 2 days after the incident as he needed us to work the weekend shift [something we found out later], and we went through 18 months of Social Services Court hearings as witnesses to the incident. I was fortunate to be employed immediately by the social services working in the community, Ann however went into a depression, she needed me at that time, and I was always there for her. 5 months later Ann was able to start working on the community too, but she had become quieter and withdrawn. About 5yrs ago, Ann decided that she wanted to ease her friendship and visits with me as I reminded her of the traumatic time we went through together, she couldn't stop talking about it, she was becoming obsessed with what happened. I understood her feelings because I knew she was under a lot of stress with her husband, who had developed a form of arthritis shortly after the court case had ended [the home got closed down, and the residents were moved to neighbouring homes, we both felt guilty about this, but Ann couldn't shut out the long term feelings of guilt, whereas I accepted it as an inevitable occurence - It was the only way I could deal with it all eg everything happens for a reason], and she was tired by it all. I miss her, and usually when Ann appears in my dream, it is normally when some emotional conflict, or stressful situation re: work is going on in my head. So yes, we have shared an emotional experience which made us very close to each other, Marg' was a tremendous support to us both. Marg' and I are both private people, and there is only so much about our marital conflicts that we tell each other, but we both know each other too, words aren't always necessary with us!! So yes Jerry, there is a strong connection re: emotional experiences.
My sister who is in the dream is going through marital difficulties, so yes, again there is shared experiences between us.
At this present time I don't feel any difficulties in my relationship re: my husband, I feel the difficulties are with me personally and my work. I feel frustrated with myself. I feel that I am just a number in a workforce. 7yrs ago, I started to become tired in everything I did, and then it was discovered that I had an underactive thyroid, so now I have to be on a tablet daily for the rest of my life, which I hate. I was the person that believed in the power of the mind ;o) .. I am tired all the time, and now that I have become tired, my husband wants to do holidays and go here, there, and everywhere. I believe it's to do with him thinking as I said in the dream "I had the feeling that he was trying to make things nice in the greyness and misery of the dark underground place" .. I think I am the grey and dark underground place Jerry, and I am trying to get out of it.
I realise by your interpretation of my dream, that I 'think' I already knew what the dream meant but also, I needed it confirming to me. Yes, I am happy/overjoyed that everything is going well for my husband and I, and I love the fact that we are going on holidays now, but deep inside me I still fear that everything good doesn't last, and there will be a recurreence of past problems, and it frightens me that I cannot trust him totally!! It frightens me that I cannot trust anyone totally anymore, because a lot of my trust in people has been abused .. it's sad to be like that.
I am looking for myself Jerry, and I will find myself, but I don't think it will the very confident person that I used to be, the person I loved to be, the person that no-one would even dream about using or treating 'just as a number' ... I believe in using my intincts and my intuition, I have always used those aspects of ME that I still own and are mine to keep .. it's just everything else about me that everyone wants and feels free to take when they want to ...
And yes, my son is 'the sugar' in my life, and he is so much like me when I was ME :o) We are both spirtual thinkers, we have good conversations about the philosophy of life, and we are very close, whereas my husband prefers the television :o)
Anyway Jerry, thank you once again for giving my dream so much of your free time and attention, and
making it clear to me that the only way is forward and up ... So, into the Dragon Doors here I go .. Thank you :o) x

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

I'm having a little trouble posting my last reply, it's posting only half ... but perserverance is the name of the game ... so, I will try again with copying nad pasting :o) x

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Hi again Jerry ... To tell of the shared experiences Ann and I have, I go back 14yrs. Ann, Marg' and myself have known each other for 25yrs [well it will be 25yrs this coming october], due to working the same E.M.D Home together. In 1997, Ann and I witnessed the owner of the home physically abusing an elderly female resident, we wrote a statement re: the incident, and processed it through the appropriate procedure. Ann and I were dismissed by the owner 2 days after the incident as he needed us to work the weekend shift [something we found out later], and we went through 18 months of Social Services Court hearings as witnesses to the incident. I was fortunate to be employed immediately by the social services working in the community, Ann however went into a depression, she needed me at that time, and I was always there for her. 5 months later Ann was able to start working on the community too, but she had become quieter and withdrawn. About 5yrs ago, Ann decided that she wanted to ease her friendship and visits with me as I reminded her of the traumatic time we went through together [now thinking about it on reflection of your reply to my dream a similar situation also happened to Marg' 5 yrs ago, and she was suspended from work, now I know why Ann wanted to ease her friendship with me, the thing with Marg' must have affected her more than I had realised .. golly, I never even thought about that until this second on trying to repost this post!!], she couldn't stop talking about it, she was becoming obsessed with what happened. I understood her feelings because I knew she was under a lot of stress with her husband, who had developed a form of arthritis shortly after the court case had ended, and had to give up work - the home got closed down, and the residents were moved to neighbouring homes, we both felt guilty about this, but Ann couldn't shut out the long term feelings of guilt, whereas over time I accepted it as an inevitable occurence, but I couldn't understand her not wanting to be friends anymore [until now]!! It was the only way I could deal with it all eg everything happens for a reason, and she was tired by it all. I miss her, and usually when Ann appears in my dream, it is normally when some emotional conflict, or stressful situation re: work is going on in my head. So yes, we have shared an emotional experience which made us very close to each other, Marg' was a tremendous support to us both, and so therefore i was the one who supported Marg' through her traumatic experience which last 4yrs. Marg' and I are both private people, and there is only so much about our marital conflicts that we tell each other, but we both know each other too, words aren't always necessary with us!! So yes Jerry, there is a strong connection re: emotional experiences between the 3 of us.
My sister who is in the dream is going through marital difficulties, so yes, again there is shared experiences between us too.
At this present time I don't feel any difficulties in my relationship re: my husband, I feel the difficulties are with me personally and my work. I feel frustrated with myself. I feel that I am just a number in a workforce.
I left the community and went to work in the college 5hrs lecturing care, and 20hrs assessing care in the candidates places of work so they could obtain a national vocational qualification, but I left it 7yrs ago, and went back to work in a nursing home. I started to become tired in everything I did, and then it was discovered that I had an underactive thyroid, so now I have to be on a tablet daily for the rest of my life, which I hate. I was the person that believed in the power of the mind. I was the person who told everyone 'think positively' [another thing the dream reminds me off is "you have to experience it to understand it" - it's all making sense to me now ;o) .. I am tired all the time, and now that I have become tired, my husband wants to do holidays and go here, there, and everywhere. I believe it's to do with him thinking as I said in the dream "I had the feeling that he was trying to make things nice in the greyness and misery of the dark underground place" .. I think I am the grey and dark underground place Jerry, and I am trying to get out of it.
I realise by your interpretation of my dream, that I 'think' I already knew what the dream meant but also, I needed it to sink in and make me remember!! Yes, I am happy/overjoyed that everything is going well for my husband and I, and I love the fact that we are going on holidays now, but deep inside me I still fear that everything good doesn't last, and there will be a recurreence of past problems, and it frightens me that I cannot trust him totally!! It frightens me that I cannot trust anyone totally anymore, because a lot of my trust in people has been abused .. it's sad to be like that.
I am looking for myself Jerry, and I will find myself, but I don't think it will the very confident person that I used to be [I'm older now too], the person I loved to be, the person that no-one would even dream about using or treating 'just as a number' ... I believe in using my intincts and my intuition, I have always used those aspects of ME that I still own and are mine to keep .. it's just everything else about me that everyone wants and feels free to take when they want to ...
And yes, my son is 'the sugar' in my life, and he is so much like me when I was ME :o) We are both spirtual thinkers, we have good conversations about the philosophy of life, and we are very close, even though he doesn't admit it, whereas my husband prefers the television to conversation :o)
Anyway Jerry, thank you once again for giving my dream so much of your free time and attention, and
making it clear to me that the only way is forward and up ... So, into the Dragon Doors here I go .. Thank you :o) x

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Shirley,
Thanks for the detailed response. Let me examine the post later today and see what I can come up with that may shed new thoughts.

The social dragon summons {slang for I have responsibilities related to work/job}. Slaying the dragon in the present time is 'taking care of business'. For the future it would represent slaying THE dragon so I can put all my energies to the dream world. Saving the damsel in distress, saving my feminine self {intuitive abilities and my working with dreams} from the world of social obligations.

Jerry

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Thank you Jerry .... I dare say that this damsel does need saving :o) ... I have had to copy and paste your reply to notepad so I could read it, for some reason my latest posts and your replies have started showing half of the post ... more than likely it's only a glitch at this end of the globe :o) ... Thank you Jerry :o) x

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Shirley,
Switch to Threaded Version.
I notice only part of the page in your last two posts and my response were showing. You can see the full page if you switch to the 'Threaded' version located at the top page in the same line as 'Start A New Post' & 'The Forum is Open'.

Jerry

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Shirley,
Your dream is at the top of my list {along with Kristen's} and I will give it my attention later this morning or early afternoon. Unexpected business transactions came up last night and I must work on a contract this morning to finalize the job.

Such are the demands of the social dragon. WE must slay all dragons.

Jerry

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Shirley,
Thanks for the response. The connection in the dream and waking life with Marg and Ann are likely the various shared emotional experiences. The dream used those relationships to expound on your own inner emotional conflicts. This how dreams often function, using images and symbols to present a motif of personal experiences illustrated through relationships such as with Marg and Ann. Marg and Ann are metaphorical representations of yourself and dreams, with their language of symbol and metaphor, utilize know aspects of these two friends to help you consciously understand your own inner conflicts.

One reason for this 'dream language' is because the primitive mind, the developing mind of ancient man, thought in a language of symbols. An example would be the language of symbols and images, better known as hieroglyphics, used by the early Egyptians. Although the brain has evolved to using a language of words and numbers the early imprinting's of images are still used by the brain in dreams. Exactly why nature uses this method of language in dreams is not clearly understood. But it may have something to do with 'foundations'. Our system of language evolved from he early experiences of mankind. So to does the foundations of our personality/psyche evolve out of the earliest experiences/influences in life. What was learned early on influences/shapes what 'becomes' later in history/life.

I digress.
Your sister was briefly mentioned in the dream so the relationship/associations with her are not the strong shared experiences as with Marg and Ann. The stronger the shared experiences the more likely the inclusion of the symbolic references {Marg & Ann}.

The stresses/conflicts in life are what the dream seeks to help sort out and resolve during unconscious sleep {REM sleep
is when we most often dream}. This is, in my mind, nature's therapeutic device for the mind, to help resolve emotional conflicts, conscious and unconscious. Just as the body has the immune system, also a product of nature, the mind has the dream.

What is the solution to your emotional stresses/conflicts? If here was one simple answer I would be rich and famous. But I do believe a good path to follow is first to resolve/eliminate those things that cause emotional stress in life. And avoid creating new conflicts. This can be a long process {my personal path to wholeness has been over a period of 18 years and I am in reaching distance of a final, hopefully, solution with early retirement}. Eliminate one by one those things that cause the stresses, Change what you can and find a 'happy' balance with those you can not.

The Creative/Spiritual Self

IN everyday life where 'social duty' is the primary controlling factor {work, responsibilities, abiding by the demands of materialism, the ego centered life} the mind 'thinks' about these things constantly. The need is to change how one thinks and that first requires what I offered above, changing what you can that needs changing. The other aspect is to learn not to think about these pressures/stresses/emotional conflicts in the waking hours. One way to do that is to find something to substitute the thinking. Joseph Campbell suggests one find/develop the 'creative' aspect, which in his philosophy is a natural thing. The muse. Put the thoughts to the creative self, emerge the self in a creative aspect, that thing you love doing most. It usually comes natural, but the task of discovering exactly what it is can be difficult because the mind is so entwined with the 'social being. I 'happened' to find my calling when I saw Joseph Campbell and The Power of Myth' in 1992, my interest in dream psyche. Looking back I now realize it was there all the time, my interest in psychology at an early age finally manifesting itself at mid-life.

Another aspect of finding wholeness is in the spiritual aspect, which creativity is a part of. By giving of oneself to the other, whether literally performing the physical act, or from sharing the experiences of the psyche through the creative process. True spirituality is living in harmony with nature and oneself. Religions is a product of man, the loving soul is a product of nature. Instead of following a path of religious dogma where one may or may not live accordingly to true spiritual concepts, if a person lives in accord with nature and the basic tenets of good and what is right, nature has its own devices of reward. And the psyche becomes comfortable with the whole self because the person is being who they truly should be. Nature has its own devices for good and evil. Most of what occurs in a person's life is caused by that person. The proverb 'what goes around comes around' is true. Good actions generally produces good consequences, bad actions negative consequences {one of the basic tenets of the Eight Fold Path of Buddhism is 'right actions'}. Again, what happens in a person's life is usually from the consequences of that person's actions. It is simple formula but so hard to follow because of the developed human emotions.

You stated you had begun a spiritual search. Where are you at in that aspect of your life? Are there creative endeavors that you love to do? Or something you love to do in general, as with gardening? Put your efforts toward those aspects, develop in your life a balance between those and the personal demands and responsibilities in life. A great tool for 'changing your thinking' is not to think at all. Yoga is one path. Another is in the muses, music, art, drawing, as a path to releasing the stresses/pressures. As Campbell instructed, take a hour every day and do what you love doing most, even if it is merely listening to 'corny' music. It takes your mind off the pressures in life. Along with working to eliminate/resolve those aspects that are the cause for the stresses in life, this creative aspect will help you discover a balance. And one day, if you stay the path, you may be able to live that creative life 24/7. That is the goal, the journey to wholeness being a path of giving of oneself to a higher cause, or to the creative self. Both are spiritual in 'nature'. We are 'connected to the earth', the muse is natural aspect of the psyche. It is left to the individual to do the hard work and the rewards are a natural aspect of living a spiritual life where the creative self is controlling the life and not the ego centric material world.

You can become the heroine in your own life. It is a choice few realize and even fewer can follow. I know from personal experiences the ups and downs, ebbs and flows of this path. But what I do know it works for me and according to Campbell and Jung it can work for anyone who follows the hero path. I sincerely believe this to be true. That belief, as is most concepts I hold to in life, comes from first hand experience.

I have given much to think about. I hope I haven't rambled without doing so in a constructive way that is understood. Jungian psyche has a lot to offer for those who 'understand'. It is often a natural attraction that pushes one to get involved in this journey of self examination. An inner journey, a psychological examination. Getting past the ego centered self and discovering what is true within oneself. That is what brings about wholeness. Self discovery and staying the path. Not easy to do. Life is a psychological journey full of emotions. Minimizing the negative emotions and accenting the positives. One life, one path, one journey. The choice is left to you.

The End.

Jerry

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Re: I'm looking for my new house

Thank you once again Jerry for the time you have given to me re: the quality and the quantitive replies to my dream, it is so much appreciated ... I wish you every success for your future in your early retirement, and your more in-depth study of dreams - I know you will always succeed :o) ... Thank you for helping me 'understand' my dream .. Best wishes ... Shirley x

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Re: I'm looking for my new house-Threaded Option For Viewing Post

There seems to be a faulty connection in the last posted messages in this thread. If the posted messages are only partially visible in the last several posts you can switch to the 'Threaded' version of the Dream Forum and see the complete posts. This option is at the top of the board on the right side and in line with 'Start A New Post'.

Jerry

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