Hi! I just need some explanation about the 4 dreams I had with my ex-boyfriend. The first dream occured when we were still together. I dreamt that we got married. I was wearing a white wedding dress and he is wearing a red and black warrior type of clothes. We were so happy and we hugged each other and never want to let go. He gave me a rusty ring with a diamond. Then one of his friends said "At last! you guys got married!" The second dream occured after we broke up. I was on a beach and he approached me then he locked his fingers into mine. The third one, we were in the kitchen of my house then he was teasing me to make me laugh. Then I said I'm sorry and I hugged him. The last one, I woke up from a sleep then saw my phone with 75 messages and 100 missed calls, all from him. I read his messsages. on those messages, he was asking me why am i not answering his calls, why am i not texting back, then he told me that he is cooking "adobo" which is his favorite, he also said that he will just wait until i reply. I just need to know what those dreams mean. Thank you so much for the answer.

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Jean,
I will give your dream a thorough inspection later today. If you see this post before then perhaps you could tell us why the relationship did not work out. Could it have to do with his personal qualities or personality {wearing a red and black warrior type clothes}? Red could be symbolic of 'temper', angery reactions. Black warrior clothes may also suggest conscious tendencies of a 'warrior', combative type mentality/personality. Perhaps for a time you 'missed' these calls warning you about these aspects he possessed.

Or, as an alternative possibility the relationship was so 'combative' it could not endure. This could also have to do with his personality/qualities, as well as your own masculine aspects.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 61 Murfreesboro, Tn. USA

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Well, according to him, we broke up because of me. My family problems affected our relationship and we had argued wtih money. I asked him for a few months to fix everything since I just lost our baby but then he refused. He said that he is no longer happy and he broke up with me.

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Jean,

Th dreams are likely focusing on your relationship with your ex-bf. The dream prior to the breakup probably involves your conflicting emotions about the relationship, the white wedding dress representing your positive attitude and your desires for being a bride and the warrior type clothing symbolizing his negative attitude and his 'combative' attitude toward the relationship. The rusty ring with a diamond would suggest you felt there was problems in the relationship, the 'rusty' commitment {ring} to wholeness {diamond} you seek.

The next two dreams are dealing with the issues involved with the relationship.

The final dream would likely symbolize message from your unconscious. Everything involves him, not the relationship, not your welfare, his feelings and desires. The 'messages' may be reflection of your unconscious recognizition of his negative attitudes prior to the breakup. Everything was about him, not you, the relationship. Although you knew of these qualities you may have ignored the signs {common when someone is 'in love' or seeks to solidify a relationship}.

Of course only you can know for sure your emotions prior to and after the break up. But from what you state in your posts and what seems to be 'reflected' in the dreams, he seemed to be more interested in himself and not you and making the relationship work. Look deep into your soul and see if this is true. If so it may be best the relationship is over and you need to move on.

Jerry

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thanks for the reply. can you clarify the meaning about the beach and the one on the kitchen? He actually had issues with his life at that time we broke up and he is dealing with it. I know he can't handle the pressure at the time so he ended the relationship. i told some of my trusted friends about what happened and they said he has a problem with himself and he can't handle it. my ex-bf will not admit it because of his pride. thanks again.

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To answer your question about the beach and kitchen symbols. A beach is a common symbol for the 'bridge' between conscious and unconscious {the ocean representing the unconscious}. It would symbolize unconscious aspects that need to be made conscious, realizing something about your life you consciously are not aware of, repress or ignore. What is coming out of the unconscious, via the beach, is the locking of fingers. Fingers often represent manipulation.

In your last response you state your ex-bf had a problem with himself and couldn't handle it. Was manipulation a part of that problem. This dream may have been speaking to your unconscious/conscious recognition of this manipulating behavior toward you {your dreams area bout your emotional life}. Would that also address my statement about his being only interested in himself {the dreams would be addressing his feelings as they affect you and your emotions}.

As for the kitchen dream. Kitchens are where we prepare food, a symbol for emotional nourishment. The house is you so this 'emotional nourishment would apply to you. Teasing would symbolize 'receiving favor' as an emotional release. Unconsciously, or perhaps consciously, you knew he was using such tactics to gain favor and make you feel like the guilty party when you argue. This type of behavior would also be a sign of a self centered person who tends to manipulate others for his own benefit.

Is he that type person, the problem you mentioned where he could not help himself? Such behavioral attitudes would fit with 'someone who cares only about himself and not the relationship'.

Jerry

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all you said about him is true. I'm stubborn when it comes to some things in our relationship and i guess he doesn't like that. thank you so much for enlightening me. now i can make a final decision and be happy in my life again. I know that i made mistakes along the way but i make it up to him all the time. I guess learning the art of letting go is now my next step. thank you so kindly. i'll post again if ever i have another unexplained dream. take care.

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Thank you Jean for providing a final response. That you were able to connect the dots so the dream made sense in your mind {you are the ultimate judge} let's me know there was a proper communication of the dream symbols so you could understand its message. Knowing the interpretation and further explanation had a positive affect so you could objectively make a decision on how to proceed, that is a bonus reward and makes me even more enthusiastic about working with dreams. My goal, besides providing a proper interpretation, is to be able to articulate the dream in a manner so the dreamer is able to connect the dots and put the pieces together. Interpreting the symbols is but one aspect in a proper interpretation, articulating the message so it is understood is just as important.

Letting go can be very difficult. But with time, and a willingness to be positive and move on, will help heal the wounds. If you can look at it as not just an ending but also a new beginning, the possibilities for better things will surely come. Dreams are about the emotions and when you can understand your own emotions then objectivity has a chance and subjectivity {what negative emotions feed on} loses its emotional energy. Affairs of the heart are perhaps as strong of energy driven emotions as there are. Getting past that is never easy. And I dare say most everyone will have an experience of the heart at least once in a life time. By learning from the mistakes there is a 'wisedom' learned, not to repeat the mistakes, and that is one positive benefit that such an experience can provide. Be positive for the future, look forward to the greater possibilities, and things will get better. As are most things in your life, it is your actions that ultimately decide what occurs in your future.

Good luck in your future. You are always welcome to post your dreams at the Forum if you feel a need of an interpretation.

Jerry

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