Hi Jerry - Gottagrip of "Howling Great Dane"

Watching myself ride a bike from above. (30 feet above?)It is night.
It's pitch black at my margins, as I am riding, seemingly, under a spotlight.
I am alone. riding in a straight line.
I am riding across a blank, flat yard of light-colored gravel.
about every 4 seconds i pass through a double-doored cyclone fence gate.
The gates close behind me as I pass through.
After I pass through three gates, I become agitated in my sleep.
I become aware of my heart pounding out of my chest.
I pass through maybe three more gates and My pounding heart just wakes me up.

It was a nightmare...not a peaceful or interesting dream.
There are no other particulars...just bland repetition with extreme adjoining anxiety.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 54 USA TX

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gottagrip,
Riding a bicycle is often symbolic of seeking balance in life. The night would be unconscious aspects and the 30 feet focusing on the number 3....not quite whole because of emotional conflicts {4 is the number for wholeness}.

The pitch black at the margins may suggest conscious realizations of the unconscious emotional conflicts but not quite an understanding of their energies, or an acceptance of the forces. The spotlight would be on these unresolved issues. Riding in a straight line may have to do seeking balance and overcoming limitations {the ego accepting what is true}.

The yard with the gravel may suggest a need for practically of the ego {instead of letting the emotions lead you}.

The 4 seconds would be the path to wholeness {resolving the emotional issues} and passing through the various gates with be going through the phases of acceptance of what is required to resolve the issues. You have to transcend the barriers {of the ego self which wants to ignore or repress this need}.

With each new transcendence and acceptance of the emotional conflicts you are one step closer to closing the gates to the emotional wounds.

The agitation in your sleep is the unconscious {sleep} seeking to overcome the resistance of the ego mind to what needs to be done to resolve the issues {3-not quite whole-emotional conflict}.

Your heart beating out of your chest could represent the need to confront {out of chest} the unresolved emotions {heart}. There may be a fear in doing this, the emotional pain being a factor. Plus the conscious ego sees life as being just fine without having to confront the unconscious conflicts {the ego opposes anything that attempts to disrupt the world it has built-a perceived world and not the true self}.

Passing through three more gates may suggest you continue to repeat the same path of resistance. You need to 'wake up' to the emotional conflicts and resolve the issues instead of just letting them lie dormant within your unconscious.

In you last dream post {Howling Great Dane with Glowing blue eyes} you stated in your response "I am fine...I keep the emotional baggage right below my surface." Have you resolved these issues are you merely keeping them hidden and at bay? This dream seems to suggest you have not yet reconciled the conflicts. In such a case your dreams will be more 'nightmarish' because unresolved emotional conflicts take on a greater urgency and possess greater energies as long as they remain unresolved. Unconsciously these unresolved issues may have control over aspects of your life you are not aware of {I went through my 20s and early 30s being controlled by unresolved/unconscious emotional issues}.

The ego thing I mention. The ego world is different from the true self. It is constructed on experiences/influences from early life {especially childhood} and the environment you live in. The ego personality conforms to the world around it and builds a perceived world that fits in. But underneath {" I keep the emotional baggage right below my surface> is the true self. The outer world is actually influenced if not controlled by the 'baggage beneath the surface'. The ego self has built a world where you do keep the true self hidden and the ego is perfectly fine with that. It will resist any attempt to bring out the true self. But eventually, and most often, these things 'naturally' begin to ease up from the depths wanting to be made conscious. This is a function of dreams {and an psychologist/analyst when things become too hard for the ego to handle and you have to seek professional help}. Knowing these things are there and not resolving the underlying issues {abnormal childhood, issues of abuse, etc} only makes it worse since these things can only resolve themselves at best partially {if at all}. You grow out of some things but the underlying forces remain as long as you do not 'go back' and determine what it is/was that caused the unresolved issues to begin with. It is like letting a wasp colony form at your front door {ego} only to get so big it begins to attack you whenever you try to 'open' the door to your house. Eventually a single sting becomes a real threat.

Let me know your thoughts and perhaps we can expand on what the dream is trying to communicate and possibly what needs to be done to resolve these issues.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 63 Space Coast, Fla.

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Hmmm...
Read your response twice.
Don't have balance...check...all focus on children and work...even at the expense of the attentions to my wife...yes, we are both guilty and talk about it often... we address...get away weekend coming up.

yes the "baggage", not necessarily the "howling" baggage control a lot of what i do, how I act, etc.

No, I can't ever see resolving the Howling Baggage. I don't want to hurt my Mom by confronting her about what happened. I knew all along that it was a anger thing, a jealousy thing...I had no control.

Same with my father...his baggage has to be much heavier than mine. He is a genius, with a closed personality. Although we were very close, I didn't really know him...what made him tick...what makes him tick...6'5" physical specimen and controlled by my angry 4'10" mom...she's formidable.

My parents did and do sincerely love me. They are proud of me. No one faked anything. We were the Brady Bunch with a really big, destructive elephant in the room.

Not sure of the three or four analogy is correct, I could have just as easily switched the two, but I get your point. I like four way better than three...and I like blue way better than red.

These things will go unresolved, but accepted (many gates, but I won't get through all of them. Pretty sure.

The heart pounding follows suit and makes sense when you put it that way (in and out)

I have a knack for not letting the wasp nest grow. I am kind of pragmatic. What I meant by "just under the surface" was that I keep it there to keep an eye on it, not to suppress it, and to make sure that I do not repeat it.

Dig?

Again...thanks...this is sneaky fun (being about me), and I feel like i am learning a thing or two about my dreams.

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gottagrip,
If you do not wish to confront your parents then you will need another way to resolve those issues. Although you have been able to keep the baggage 'beneath the surface' unconsciously it is still an issue. You can go through life without confronting it but unconsciously it will play on you and it probably already has affected your person and personality. The good thing is you have analyzed your parents behavior and can see why they are who they are. More of that, in relationship to how they treated you, may be the answer. You can do this on your own {read my pages Individuation Process and Individuation and the Union of Opposites} or seek professional help. From what you have posted i believe you are fully capable of doing it yourself. The main thing is to go the full distance and resolve the issues. When it stops being a part of your dreams you know you have succeeded.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 63 Space Coast, Fla.

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