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Jerry's Dream-Driving a Loaded Truck

I had a dream last night that I awoke to early this morning with it fresh in my mind. I reference the 'clearness' of memory of the dream because most dreams I have are not remembered without some real effort {and often not at all}. I attribute this type dream to its importance. Dreams that lose their energy upon waking are, in my mind, normal dreams that hold a message but not one central to a new phase or important need in the dreamer's life {at the time of the dream}. After I pen the dream and the interpretation you will better understand my thinking.

By the way. I knew when I awoke what the dream was 'primarily' about. By primarily I mean the main focus of the dream. Because I, as did Jung, believe every image {every dream} has at least two interpretations/meanings/applications, there is usually a primary focus on one of the applications. I knew what this dream was about immediately, as I often do with my dreams I remember so vividly. Why is this true? I believe it is because I am aware of my life, consciously and unconsciously, having identified, confronted and resolved those old emotional issues that so strongly governed my early life, and I am consciously aware of the new issues. This 'knowledge' is a part of the 'Individuation Process'' I have actively and consciously engaged over the past 21 years.

The Dream
I was working for an unknown person who owned a construction business. We {myself, owner?, other employees} were at a wholesaler to pick up a load of materials. There were several men in the material yard, some who who worked with me, others who were employees for the wholesaler. None I could identified specifically but it 'felt' I knew most of them. My boss was around but not actually visible {I could hear him speaking to other people in the office and yard}. I got the impression, without actually seeing him during the dream, he looked like the actor Patrick Steward.

As we were loading the truck I was told by a fellow employee the boss didn't have the money to pay for the materials but to go ahead and load the materials anyway, not letting the whole sellers know this. But it seemed as if the whole sellers knew this already, or didn't care. They loaded the truck with the materials that looked to be stacks of plasterboard {4'x8' standard dimensions}, all stacked in neat rows. They made sure the truck was loaded properly on the truck bed. The vehicle was a strange looking vehicle, one that looked as if it were the type to carry such a load but not the normal truck used to haul materials. As it was being loaded I was told I would drive the truck to its destination although I had no experience in driving this type vehicle . I was taken back a bit, thinking I was to drive the vehicle, concerned of the heavy load as well as the type vehicle {a mixture of a crane hauled by a very heavy truck but without the boon but with a flat rear bed-see image}.

We loaded the truck without any problems {I got the impression the wholesale workers knew their job very well} and everyone was smiling and happy, as if it were a Friday, time for the weekend and satisfied with a final job well done for the week.

I got into the truck and started it up. I had to back the truck up and turn it around to go out the only exit available from the yard. It was a cumbersome truck to drive and without experience driving a this type heavy duty vehicle made it even more so. I got it turned around and headed toward the exit. I had to go up a steep but short hill to exit the yard and it 'seemed' as if I were in sandy/muddy conditions {as if the ground were wet but not so muddy it was not traversal}. Bu because of the steepness and ground conditions the truck could not make it up the hill with the heavy load. Before I could get stressed about this a yard worker jumped on the truck and lower a metal handle that was on the left side of the cab. It was a mechanism that shifted the weight from the back to the front {not aware of such a device} , evening the load over the whole truck. That allowed me to slowly drive the truck out of the yard and onto the street. I remember driving very slow and getting used to the vehicle, gaining some confidence as I drove. But I knew it was still a drive ahead of me and I needed to be cautious. end of dream.

Prelude to Interpretation
First off let me say I was self employed fence contractor for 35 years so the stock yard setting is familiar to my senses. Secondly I just over the past few days decided I was going to 'attempt' to pen a book on how to interpret dreams, using the methods I use here at the Dream Forum {the preliminary title; A Simple Gide to Interpreting dreams}. To cut to the chase this is the primary focus of the dream, a recent emotional 'event'. But looking at the dream I see associations to my journey in life, both early life {with the emotional conflicts that were resolved in my individuation} as well as the journey to my 'bliss', working with dreams and my websites}. I will not break down every image or action phrase {as I often do} but will provide a general explanation of some and go into detail with others.

Unknown People/Invisible Boss
The unknown person I was working for of course is myself. But the construction business is not the business I worked in for 35 years but the 'new business' of constructing my new book. The materials are the various parts of the book I will construct. The other men {masculine aspects} are also me, various aspects required in the new construction as well as aspects I will to 'load' up on {research} to do the book. Not having written a book before would be the 'unidentified' aspects. the 'invisible' boss is what I believe to be the 'invisible' hands available to anyone who travels the hero path. 'He' is everywhere I go, he goes with me and I can hear the voice of the great force he possesses.

Patrick Steward
As for Patrick Steward. When someone of this stature is in a dream it is because the dreamer identifies with the person in some way. This holds true for 'known normal' people in a dream such as a office worker or close friend. I am a fan of Steward, not so much of all of his filmography {not a Star Trekkie} but those he best uses his true talents. This is what I will need to accomplish the task of writing my book, the deep hidden talents. He is also someone I have recently read about on Facebook, a positive piece about his activism in 'Action on Violence Against Women'. There is also the aspect of his appearance. In the photo he has a distinctive white beard. I also have a white beard {but covers much of my face and much closer shaved}. It is the one thing that stands out in photos that show my age. Most people believe me to be much younger {33 years of physical fitness} and my beard in photos does stand out.

The Load of 4x8 Plaster Boards
I will have to write this book using the limited resources I live on {in retirement}. I know this but it does not hold me back in the least. I also think this part has something to do with my last project where I spend a few hundred dollars putting together the displays {four workshops at the EarthDance festival in Lakeland. Fl}. That venture took money I could have spent elsewhere but because I agreed to do the workshops I wanted to give a good presentation.

The loaded truck would be the load I know I will carry in researching and writing the book. This is a new 'vehicle' for me, one I am not familiar with. But the confidence of the yard workers is my confidence in my abilities to get it done. Not only to do the work but in a proper and organized way to insure it reflects what i want to write, a book that states in the simplest words how to interpret dreams. The 4x8 plaster boards represent the wholeness I will receive in this endeavor {4} plus I will be working on a project I love doing most; working with dreams {8-2x4}. The load and the experience is reflected in the dream language.

Satisfied Friday
This part conveys my confidence in myself. Not only because I believe I can achieve writing a good book but also because I have 'faith' {a word I dislike} in the hero journey and the 'helping hands' I know I will have to assist me. This is a 'looking forward' perhaps a little over self-confident but one that I expect to be come a fact. At the end of the week when I have accomplished all i set out to do, I can sit back feeling gratified. This is how I often felt in managing my construction business and all that was involved with that. This part of the dream is probably reflective of those 'emotions' also.

It also demonstrates my desired position in retirement. Working hard {M-F}and but having the time to enjoy retirement. When I first arrived at my Florida residence after leaving Tennessee I thought I wanted to give workshops and group presentations on dreams. I accumulated relatively quickly several engagements but found myself not 'being retired'. The one thing in life I want {besides following my bliss} is to be retired. I've paid the social dragon having starting work very early in life {at the age of 13 I was selling magazine subscriptions}. I like waking up every morning not being obligated to social duty. I've slain those dragons and don't, and won't create new ones. That is one message I believe central to Campbell's hero journey.

Closing & Summary
Now I must begin writing my book {starting the truck}. It will require some 'backing up' in my desire to be 'retired' {the added tasks} and a need to turn around on those desires. To be sure this will be a major undertaking. But I know I must do this as a part of my obligation to the hero journey, the specific directive 'to share what you learn' from the journey. It will be cumbersome and difficult to navigate, not having any experience with writing a book. But the confidence there and this is illustrated throughout the dream. It is a 'heavy duty' type endeavor.

Beginning the project will be the most difficult part of writing the book. But I have ideas already in my head how to do this {research not only in the subject of dreams, researching my interpretations at the Dream Forum, but also writing a book as well}. This is the 'going up the very steep sandy/muddy but short hill'. Getting started will be the hardest part but once I get going I feel there will be a flow I will be able to pen that will illustrate what I want to say. This idea has been brewing for a long time and just over the past few days have I decided now is the time.

Once I get started I can 'shift the load' of that part to actual writing the book. Although I felt tension from the dream when I had to maneuver the truck up the hill I also felt a sense of accomplishment. the feeling of stress was apart of the dream and that is probably due to my attention to stress in life {I am very disciplined about good physical and mental health}. And again I believe there are 'mechanisms' {in nature} that will help me in this endeavor. I could not do it alone, the old self that once governed my psyche. But with the helping hands {the yard worker jumping on the truck to assist me} plus other natural resources I believe will turn up I know I will succeed. I must take my time and cautiously pen exactly what I want to say, not just writing something to fill space. Every word should have relevance. Once I get started i will find the confidence within myself and will have the helping hands to guide me.

How good a book it will be? If I feel good about what I write, getting across what I really want to say, that is how I will gauge my success. The hero of myth doesn't set out to become rich and famous, he/she does it because it is what the soul desires, the bliss factor. The true artist doesn't paint to make money {Campbell's quote, "If the work you're doing is the work that you choose to do because you are enjoying it, that's it. ... And if you get off the beam to earn money, you've lost your life."}. You do it because it comes from the soul. This is what I wish to accomplish. I see this dream as an affirmation of those 'emotions' as well as a predictor of what I can and hopefully will do. Beyond merely compensating, I believe the dream is very positive with a message that is saying something about success. Perhaps that is the over confidence I feel but having worked with dreams long enough to know them, I 'sense' something more.


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