Agsunshine,
As long as you 'hide' these experiences and emotions and not confront them they will continue to control your life. The abuse is something that has taken control over you although you consciously push the experiences deeper from thinking about it. The pattern I talked about in choices of relationship is a part of the control. The guy you are dating now may or may not be the right guy for you. But as long as your senses are corrupted by unconscious stimuli you will not be able to tell right from wrong. He may the right person and just happens to have a strong introverted personality. By having these trust issues your 'intuitive' senses, those that naturally let you know true and false, is out of balance. That important psyche quality needs to function properly or you will remain at the mercy of the unconscious energies you have lived with. I strongly suggest therapy with a trained clinician or psychologist. No matter how great your belief in God is it is up to you to take control and do the deeds necessary to heal.

Please seek help. Life can be hell on earth if you continue to let these emotional conflicts ruin any chance of having a loving relationship with the right man.

Jerry

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Yes Jerry U r right. I am going to get help.

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