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Tears with my Mother

Hey Jerry,
Hope life is going great. I've been working on this dream a few days now I'd love to get your insight into it when you have the time. There's a lot to it and I have a fair idea of some of the themes but I'd love your help. It was a really emotionally powerful dream especially the last scene.

This dream starts off in the rainforest village/destination I talked about in my earlier post **The Curse** My two brothers AJ and Sean are gone (as featured in **the Edge in Dubai** the second dream I posted on this board). They offered to leave me money but I forgot to ask them I think that this is pre dream and we never actually see them. So I am figuring out how to sort my food and accommodation since I know I'm not going back to the resort I was at before.

Near the start of the dream I feel like someone walked in on me masturbating except they thought that I couldn't get it up. They were wrong yet I went along with it. I was up high looking down on them. Somehow I am beside these tram lines that run between these cabins and the beach.

And then there was also this suggestion by my gf or perhaps my ex anyway my gf in the dream about collecting as many crabs and shrimp and such seafood as possible that there was some critical mass of them in a shower room at which point they would generate so much heat as to be self-sufficient. I rejoinder that nobody would want to eat such things (all red shelled in my mind somehow) from the floor of our shower room she agrees.

Another scene i seem to be somehow very high in the esteem of this boss woman in the office like way up level nine while everyone else was down on one. This offended or perhaps gained the respect of [a lady i used to work with at the resort in the rainforest]. I knew I couldn't go back there

So I resolve to work in the cabins on the beach it's only 3 hours for accommodation and I'm figuring out what I'll do for food maybe I'll make a deal to work 5 hours or ask [another resort in the rainforest village] to work some hours for food.

There was some drama in one of the cabins that happened I gathered some reinforcements. I feel like someone was being attacked or held hostage so I got a couple of other people to help and we went back in and sorted things out. 2 of the guys backed down as accomplices and the third guy the real perp gave in to us with our superior power.

There is a scene where I am at the beach waiting for a sunrise I feel. I'm on the beach contemplating my problems and then when I look back around there's this topless sexy kinda older woman leading a tai chi class beside me on this beach. She is surrounded by a few students. She is like this powerful attractive older woman something really like mother like about her as if she were fertile or I'm not sure but something very maternal about her which makes her beauty almost like a goddess somehow. I look to the ocean and when I look back there are loads more students amongst which another woman woman topless. I am awed I think I make powerful eye contact with the woman teaching.

Then there is a working scene I feel me and two guys work on a pirate ship like working on a dry dock mechanics project of a sort (I guess repairing a ship). We are using this giant wrench to loosen a thing no to tighten it and we do so but somehow it's not working properly and so when we take off the wrench the guy can just pull the wrench head right off. I wasn't actually doing anything just watching and standing by to help. The guy beside me was turning it then the other more boss guy kicked it helping it along and determined that it was ****ed. I had walked along to the restaurant part before coming back to this drama thinking how I was going to solve my food problem when I came back to this lot.

There had been some photo analysis perhaps in between the pirate ship and the mam scene I was identifying many scenes in which there were two snakes like they'd multiplied somehow that there was always more than one snake in all these killings. There was some talk of an evolution. And an actress as a little girl in an office. Then the mam scene.

I can't remember if that is the transition but in the next scene it is [my childhood home] I am returning to the house. Is it night? My mother is telling [my aunt, her sister] that she had left the house open and that some of my aunt's stuff is gone from the top drawer but somehow she is attacking her as if it's my aunt's fault that my mother left the door open. My mother had tried to use my aunts watch and it was stuck on 6 (though it's a digital watch and thus would not get stuck but rather turn off) and so she is giving out hell to my aunt. I confront my mother and tell her she can't speak to her like that and I feel i'm really right so I'm outraged and then she tells me my aunt has been slyly attacking me behind my back and I say that one's is between us. And then somehow we end up hugging it out and really forgiving and embracing one another I kiss her cheek yet it doesn't come off there are some tears and we hold each other she offers me a tissue I say no but then accept one. The dream ends.
I feel my mother had been giving out to my aunt in the sunroom my aunt sitting in my mother's normal seat while my mother was standing up.

Wow another emotionally powerful dream. It's between me and my mother a lot of energy and feeling in this last scene.
The section of this dream with my mother had a powerful bewildering effect on me as I awoke really powerful dream. Felt it in my belly like a shock.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 23 now in canada (previously travelling Australia) but from Ireland

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Internet search I think?

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Re: Tears with my Mother

Jimmy,
I will work on your dream later today and in the morning. A very long dream that will take some time to analyze.

Jerry





Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 65 Cocoa, Fl

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Re: Tears with my Mother

Thanks jerry I tried very hard interpreting this dream but I have had to give it a break since there are just too many parts and it is hard fitting them all together. I appreciate the amount of effort and I am really very grateful for any insight you can give me. Thank you

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 23 now in canada (previously travelling Australia) but from Ireland

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Internet search I think?

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes November 27- The Curse

Re: Tears with my Mother

Jimmy,
I have been working on interpreting the images/actions all morning and have most of it done. I need to stop for now and wanting to post what I have done thus far for your inspection.

There are two aspects of the dream. One is dealing with the issues we have gone over in other dreams. Your search psychological and spiritual. That was coming along in an orderly manner when the 'drama' part of the dream came up. Have we gone over 'mother' issues in previous dreams? That is what seems to be the focus of the drama in this dream. Look at what i have come up with thus far, all but last paragraph. The last paragraph does seem to have some interesting images/actions which I will work on later to finish the analysis.
Here is my interpretation of the images/actions {preceded by the dream paragraph}

Tears with my Mother
-Healing and Nurturing/Mother

This dream starts off in the rainforest village/destination I talked about in my earlier post **The Curse** My two brothers AJ and Sean are gone (as featured in **the Edge in Dubai** the second dream I posted on this board). They offered to leave me money but I forgot to ask them I think that this is pre dream and we never actually see them. So I am figuring out how to sort my food and accommodation since I know I'm not going back to the resort I was at before.

-brothers not present but influence/values are available.
-food and accommodation-emotional support accommodating your personality
-going back to resort-back to an escape attitude

Near the start of the dream I feel like someone walked in on me masturbating except they thought that I couldn't get it up. They were wrong yet I went along with it. I was up high looking down on them. Somehow I am beside these tram lines that run between these cabins and the beach.

-walked in on me masturbating-accessing unacknowledged and unexpressed sexual/emotional needs/desires
-couldn't get it up-could not access these emotional energies
-wrong but went along-physically yes {erection}, psychologically you are still trying to access these emotional energies
-high up, looking down-consciously looking into the unconscious energies/attitudes
-beside tram lines-needing discipline
-between cabins and the beach-various conscious aspects and unconscious contents

And then there was also this suggestion by my gf or perhaps my ex anyway my gf in the dream about collecting as many crabs and shrimp and such seafood as possible that there was some critical mass of them in a shower room at which point they would generate so much heat as to be self-sufficient. I rejoinder that nobody would want to eat such things (all red shelled in my mind somehow) from the floor of our shower room she agrees.

-gf-rejected emotional aspects
-collecting as many crabs and shrimp-discovering unconscious aspects and making them conscious
**crab-trying to avoid some issue/hanging on to a hopeless endeavor or relationship
**shrimp-feeling overpowered by your emotions
**seafood-acknowledging and fulfilling the needs of your subconscious/merging unconscious with consciousness
-critical mass in shower room-important aspects in the process of cleansing
-generate heat as to be self-sufficient-induce emotional energy to reveal true self

Another scene i seem to be somehow very high in the esteem of this boss woman in the office like way up level nine while everyone else was down on one. This offended or perhaps gained the respect of [a lady i used to work with at the resort in the rainforest]. I knew I couldn't go back there

-high in esteem of boss woman in office-respecting the assertive emotional energies
-level nine while everyone else was down on one-creative/spiritual aspects vs ego aspects
-gained respect of lady {resort in rain forest}-escaping emotions/cutting down their energies
-couldn't go back there-allowing past emotional energies to control you

So I resolve to work in the cabins on the beach it's only 3 hours for accommodation and I'm figuring out what I'll do for food maybe I'll make a deal to work 5 hours or ask [another resort in the rainforest village] to work some hours for food.

-work in the cabins on the beach-consciously work with emotional energies/attitudes
-3 hours for accommodation/what I'll do for food-accommodating the nurturing aspects related to emotional conflicts
-make a deal to work for 5 hours to work for food-make changes {5} to obtain the needed nourishment {to be true self}

There was some drama in one of the cabins that happened I gathered some reinforcements. I feel like someone was being attacked or held hostage so I got a couple of other people to help and we went back in and sorted things out. 2 of the guys backed down as accomplices and the third guy the real perp gave in to us with our superior power.

-drama in one cabin/gained reinforcements-ability to confront negative emotional attitudes
-someone being attacked/held hostage-emotional energies attacking/holding you hostage
-got couple of other people to help/we went back and sorted things out-self help in resolving conflicts {couple/2=conflict}
-2 of guys backed down as accomplices-resolving conflicts that enable neagtive attitudes
-third guy/real perp gave in-aspects that are lacking {3 represents not quite being whole} in process of being resolved
-superior power-empowered in resolving issues/conflicts

There is a scene where I am at the beach waiting for a sunrise I feel. I'm on the beach contemplating my problems and then when I look back around there's this topless sexy kinda older woman leading a tai chi class beside me on this beach. She is surrounded by a few students. She is like this powerful attractive older woman something really like mother like about her as if she were fertile or I'm not sure but something very maternal about her which makes her beauty almost like a goddess somehow. I look to the ocean and when I look back there are loads more students amongst which another woman woman topless. I am awed I think I make powerful eye contact with the woman teaching.

-at beach waiting for sunrise-conscious renewal
-look back/topless sexy older woman-exhibiting seductive past emotions
-leading a tai chi class beside me at beach-emotional health being a conscious positive
-surrounded by few new students-learning to bring new attitudes to conscious life
-powerful attractive older woman/like mother-powerful emotional energies/mother relationship
-fertile-ready to bare new aspects
-maternal about her-nurturing aspects
-beauty almost like a goddess-admiration/respect of powerful feminine/emotional aspects
-look to the ocean-look within the unconscious
-look back there are loads more students-much more to be learned within unconscious
-among which is another woman topless-other powerful feminine/emotional aspects to be exposed
-make powerful eye contact with the woman teaching-connecting with inner aspects of knowledge/seeking approval with feminine authority

Then there is a working scene I feel me and two guys work on a pirate ship like working on a dry dock mechanics project of a sort (I guess repairing a ship). We are using this giant wrench to loosen a thing no to tighten it and we do so but somehow it's not working properly and so when we take off the wrench the guy can just pull the wrench head right off. I wasn't actually doing anything just watching and standing by to help. The guy beside me was turning it then the other more boss guy kicked it helping it along and determined that it was ****ed. I had walked along to the restaurant part before coming back to this drama thinking how I was going to solve my food problem when I came back to this lot.

-working scene me and two guys-working with inner issues
-on a pirate ship-suppressed desires
-dry dock mechanics project {regarding ship}-strained from working on past emotional issues
-giant wrench to loosen a thing-important need in fixing situation/loosening the emotional aspects
-'no' to tighten it-{Freudian slip?} covering it up instead?
-not working properly-not able/unwilling to resolve issue
-when we take off wrench-remove desire to fix situation
-guy can pull the wrench head right off-removing mental aspects
-just watching/standing by to help-detached/need help working to resolve issue
-guy beside me was turning it-other 'self' turning emotions
-other boss kicked it helping it along/determined it was ****ed-controlling other 'self' {ego}/useless
-walked along to the restaurant part-emotional nourishment aspects
-coming back to this drama-going back to 'dramatic' emotional attitudes
-how I was going to solve my food problem when I came back to this lot-hown to resolve emotional issues related to past nourishment issues

-There had been some photo analysis perhaps in between the pirate ship and the mam scene I was identifying many scenes in which there were two snakes like they'd multiplied somehow that there was always more than one snake in all these killings. There was some talk of an evolution. And an actress as a little girl in an office. Then the mam scene.

-photo analysis between pirate ship and mam scene-examining a relationship issue/suppressed desires/mother
-many scenes where there were two snakes-two aspects symbolic of the snake
***1 hidden fears/issues
***2 phallic? {consider this as a possibility}
-they'd had multiplied-created additional emotional issues
-always more than one snake in all these killings-Emotions that are capable of 'killing' you
-talk of an evolution-evolving emotions/understanding
-an actress as a little girl in an office-???? You may be able to fit this in. Are there any personal associations you can think of? It may relate to evolving emotions {feminine girl} that you are consciously acting out or need to act out
-then the mam scene-mother experiences/issues

Jerry




.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 65 Cocoa, Fl

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Re: Tears with my Mother

Wow jerry thank you so much I can see how much work you have put into this. It's a tough dream for me to unravel because there are these many aspects to it. We have not dealt with 'mother' issues in any of my past dreams they were more to do with father elements. This dream certainly seems to be about the feminine and indeed the mother theme given that there are just so many woman of so many different types so prominent in it. It's a bit overwhelming. As far as my relationship with my mother goes I do think that it is a big thing. It's more my teenage years than my childhood years where it was eventful though perhaps there are underlying childhood issues which set this up. We had a falling out when I was a teenager and we didn't speak for weeks but of course in the end all was fine. Yet from that day it has been different. It's like there's a distance between us I guess its a part of growing up-the separation from the mother- but I know that it is time we became close again that I form a bond with her as a man since that day was the end of my relationship to her as a boy and this time since has been like a transition phase where there is a will on both sides to connect but neither of us could bridge the gap I guess since the old roles were altered I didn't know how to connect with her deeply. We get on and we are both very nice people but still I want to connect with her deeply and to form the second relationship with her as a son who is a man. This was one of my revelations in Australia. The need to go back home and reconnect with family and to connect deeply with my roots since I'd left Ireland when I was just out of school and then gone travelling. So this is the state of my feelings and thoughts towards my mother. But I'm not sure how this plays out in the dream. I guess this is one of the major things to face in my emotional and dreamwork and makes sense as a next stage in the psychological and spiritual search as you call it. I'm not sure if this makes it click together better with you. I still cannot fully understand the dream even with all these aspects. It's still so multifaceted and vast.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 23 now in canada (previously travelling Australia) but from Ireland

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Internet search I think?

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes November 27- The Curse

Re: Tears with my Mother

Jimmy,
My analysis was incomplete beyond just interpreting the last paragraph. Most likely your mother enters into the equation since there are so many images alluding to that possibility. But the other older woman could be addressing inner feminine aspects. Your journey and transformation would have at least some associations and it could be the primary focus of the dream. If so then the experience with your mother could be a secondary issue. I am so confident that there are at least two meanings/applications to every dream {if not every image} the possibilities of one aspect being a primary focus and a second {and possibly more} a lesser focus but with interchangeable symbolic images. Let me finish the analysis tomorrow with the additional info you have provided and see where it goes.

By the way. It was a lot of work interpreting the images/actions because it is such a long dream. But my intuitive mojo was working overtime and when the juices are flowing it takes a lot less effort.
Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 65 Cocoa, Fl

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Yes

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Re: Tears with my Mother

Haha fantastic to hear that Jerry!
I look forward to part II tomorrow

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 23 now in canada (previously travelling Australia) but from Ireland

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Internet search I think?

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes November 27- The Curse

Re: Tears with my Mother

Jimmy,
I am working the last paragraph and there seems to be the possibility of 'hidden' aspects in the narrative. What I need to know to help clarify the images and where they fit is the images/actions of your aunt. Can you tell me something about her, your relationship with her, your impressions? The additional narrative you provided about your aunt sitting in your mother's normal seat seems to be pointing to your aunt in your mother's position in some aspect. The aunt image can be symbolic of being a substitute for the mother. If you can give clarity to your actual aunt relationship then perhaps a discernible pattern will emerge.

As for the possibility of hidden aspects. The childhood home image along with returning to the house {childhood} and being night {unconscious aspects} point to childhood experiences. The stolen stuff from the top drawer {mental hidden aspects that are stored away} could be addressing a childhood experience that had emotional energies. Is there anything in your childhood you can point to that would fit with this?

Jerry

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Re: Tears with my Mother

Jerry,

I did actually find a,very interesting dynamic between my aunt and my mother in my own analyses. My aunt is my mother's elder sister and my associations with her are that she is extraverted and more openly nurturing and emotional than my mother (who is more introverted and a little bit sensitive and shy I guess). So in the way my aunt is I see a more expressive nurturing side. My aunt is one of our closest relatives (along with my grandmother) she is generous and considerate. I guess there are traits of hers that I wish my mother had such as this expressiveness of her nurturing side. I feel perhaps that my mother has been the shyer child in their relationship as I have been the shy one in my family growing up.
As for a particular childhood experience again I am coming up empty. I will think on it further but I seem to be drawing a blank...

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 23 now in canada (previously travelling Australia) but from Ireland

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Internet search I think?

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes November 27- The Curse

Re: Tears with my Mother

Jimmy,
I'll go back to work on your dream on Monday. I worked yesterday {as usual for Saturdays} and had to do paperwork this morning as well as clean house. After some less involved work with other dreams it is now noon and my 'dream' mind is ready for rest. I want a fresh mind when I tackle your dream. There are several aspects that not only need more analysis to their meaning/application but also how the dream played out and changed from addressing your journey to focusing on 'childhood' things. I will say that usual dreams about childhood issues have the childhood images/actions in the very first part of the dream {the dreams being about childhood experiences that I have pointed to time and again and positively confirmed by the dreamer}. The inclusion of childhood images/actions later in the dream often are different in some ways. Exactly how and to what degree I am still trying to understand. This dream may help advance that understanding. Thus may enthusiasm for better understanding the dream.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 65 Cocoa, Fl

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Yes

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Re: Tears with my Mother

Brilliant jerry I'm glad to be a help also this is very interesting I didn't realise that its generally different if the childhood stuff is at the end this a a fascinating little tidbit for me. Thank you and I look forward to your discoveries,
Jimmy

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 23 now in canada (previously travelling Australia) but from Ireland

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Internet search I think?

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes November 27- The Curse

Re: Tears with my Mother

Jimmy,
Let's go back to the next to last paragraph where there is a photo analysis between the pirate ship and the mam scene. The photo could represent a need to examine a relationship where you have not given enough attention to. Photos are of the past so the image may be directing you to look back to your past {something the last paragraph addresses}.

The analysis is between the pirate ship and the mam scene could be defining the issue you have yet to recognize as an energy that needs reconciliation. In fact it could have a part of the reasoning {and motivation} for your travels to other parts of the world. It could also be why the last paragraph to do with the transition points back to childhood home {and childhood foundations which would possess energies into adulthood}. The pirate ship could symbolize suppressed desires for freedom and adventure. That is exactly what you are doing in your life today, traveling to different countries seeking adventure. Can you identify a specific reason for your travels? Perhaps the dream is addressing the underlying energies that prompt you to do so. The pirate ship representing the desire/need for adventure, you are working {with two guys} on the ship, and inner issues. The analysis of that is to the mam scene. What is that about?

There are actually two paragraphs that have the mother image. The last paragraph which specifically names your mother would likely be the mam scene the dream denotes but we can not dismiss the earlier mention. That is in the beach scene {beach representing a transition-beach to sea/renewal}. There is a powerful older woman, 'something really like mother like about her', fertile and something very maternal about her which makes her beauty almost like a goddess somehow. You look to the ocean {unconscious} and when you 'look back' there are more 'students' amongst which another woman woman topless. Being topless would expose the breasts which could denote motherhood, nurturance, and dependency. "I am awed I think I make powerful eye contact with the woman teaching." Translated meaning, 'connecting with inner aspects of knowledge/seeking approval with feminine authority'. It is after this paragraph the pirate ship scene takes place. Working with inner issues {with the wrench} and the 'food' problems.
{I won't go into the full paragraph interpretation but the tai chi action may be learning a 'defense' as a part of your transition}.

Then the photo analysis takes place. Two snakes, aspects that are hidden, a need for transformation as well as symbol for the Kundalini, the power of true transformation from ego to spiritual enlightenment {multiplied/multiple meanings/applications}. Killings are changes within oneself, death and resurrection {snake-a snake looses its skin and grows new}. Talk {inner} of an evolution. The actress as a little girl symbolic of a developing feminine power, the office practicality, status, accomplishments and your place in the world.
Then the mam scene.

The last paragraph and the mam scene
I still see these images and actions addressing childhood energies. But instead of being issues addressing emotional conflicts of childhood stress it may be addressing issues of a deeper need for emotional nourishment. This is where your aunt becomes a 'mother replacement' . What is missing from the drawers were missing aspects of nourishment. The attack is within you, emotional issues in conflict within you. The whole paragraph actions can be interpreted in this manner. There may be actual experiences involved but the symbolic references would be about nourishment your feel your aunt could provide {"I guess there are traits of hers that I wish my mother had such as this expressiveness of her nurturing side."}. Looking back {on my part} the whole dream could be addressing this one issue as a primary focus. It all seems to fall into place.

Two notes. One is the difference in having greater knowledge of the dreamer and an ability to analyze the dream on a personal scale as opposed to the outline I can provide with the limited knowledge I have from posted dreams. My belief is re-enforced that with indepth knowledge of the dreamer a trained/experienced dream analyst can properly and correctly analyze any dream. I restate that dreams are no longer a great mystery, we have solved the problem how to analyze/interpret dreams using Jungian psyche. And because I have gotten away from using the strict Jungian concepts I believe this method is as acceptable than if we did use strict academic standards. A psychologist who possesses the ability to interpret dreams as the primary method of analysis can get to the depths of the emotional issues in a short time compared to what it takes to do the normal analysis {Freudian}.

A second note goes to the childhood images/actions in dreams. As I stated in my last post, any time a dream opens with a description of a childhood home, time frame, experiences denoting childhood 'always' points to issues/emotional conflicts that specifically go back to those early years {I qualify 'always' knowing nothing in life is absolute beyond death and taxes}. What was different about your dream was the position of the childhood images. It was in the last paragraph which gave me pause from the offset but not to the point to make me believe it was addressing something different than when in the opening of a dream. What is different is perhaps the scale of the emotional conflict and the fact you are actually playing out in your adult life the adventurous attitude you naturally possessed which needed a strong stimulation in childhood. Stimulation your mother could not provide but your aunt could. Your aunts traits are your natural traits {the universal symbolic meaning of another person in a dream having associations you identify with}. The childhood issues would be those 'mother' aspects you needed and your mother could not provide and not about 'traumatic' childhood issues if the childhood images/actions were in the first part of the dream. The basic meaning/application doesn't change {there are emotional issues from childhood} but the scale and energies are different. I come away with a greater understanding not only of your dream but possibly something new about dreams that could point to 'universal' themes and placement. Every dream is a learning experience but some offer greater insights. And according to the laws of the hero path {Monomyth} these new insights come at a time when it is right/ripe for them to appear. This could apply to my own understanding as well as yours, this dream not only providing insights to emotional nourishment in your life but also pointing to why you are the adventurous type person despite the introverted childhood {I also experienced a similar introverted childhood and I am by nature an extrovert}. The goal is to find balance in both aspects and learning to balance all other aspects in life.



Let me note that the childhood applications I mention are my theory taken from my experiences in analyzing dreams. Each time I have had a dream where the opening had actions/images related to co childhood my analysis noted childhood issues. In every case the response was positive, yes my analysis fit, there were childhood issues and when specifics energies were provide {in my analysis} those also were confirmed. I believe this could very well point to a natural and 'universal' application in dreams. This could also apply to many images/actions in dreams where the same images/actions have a 'universal' application. This is not something an academic would state or even consider. But again I use basic Jungian concepts loosely and not the strict standards Jungian psychologists/therapists apply. I have met with great success with this method.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 65 Cocoa, Fl

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Yes

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Re: Tears with my Mother

Jerry
Right this is brilliant. There's a lot here. I definitely think you are right about my aunt as a nurturing figure in contrast to my mother. And also about the theme of nurturing being at the core of the dream. I have noticed that in this dream there was a host of female characters of almost all varieties a lover a colleague/female I don't trust, there was the powerful last up on level 9, then of course was the teacher and great mother kind of character, her students one of who also was topless and then there was my mother herself and my aunt (a theme by the way which has been cropping up in quite a few dreams recentlyso there is something very important in it). It is certainly to do with nurturing aspects. And I can see that my aunt certainly makes up for what my mam lacked this expressiveness and feeling of nurturing. The top drawer makes sense to me here as well. What I don't understand still is what the dream is asking of me or what it is trying to say. It is speaking of these dynamics of nurturing in my life but I can't figure out why. Am I to integrate the nurturing of my aunt or to accept my mother's style of nurturing. Am I trying to heal wounds or calibrate relationships? Anyway perhaps these are questions only I can answer since the associations are my own.
Yet as I really over your response again I am thinking about the travelling element and the broader sweep of the nurturing dynamic. Why did I go travelling? To be honest I don't know. I wasnt an excited but almoet a reluctant traveller. When I booked my flights I had finished my studies in Scotland and so it was ripe for me to leave there and I felt no pull to go back to Ireland at all which was interesting. It's where my family is and always that place but that had no draw for me no need. I guess I did not find it nurturing. Neither was Scotland nurturing particularly. A couple of months before I went traveling I decided to master lucid dreaming and dedicated myself to this. This required a very disciplined sleep hygiene and actually when I went to Ireland before I left o actually found it the most nourishing I have ever experienced in my life. I recall arriving in Melbourne on the bus from the airport and being anxious about hostels and the culture of drink and drugs in them. I knew this travelling was going to be a test for me more than a joy. So at first I was a reluctant traveller. Of course my lucid dreaming broke down but through its struggles I was introduced to Jung by fellow travellers and my life has erupted since with the magic that not just Jung but other such depth psychologies have brought to my understanding. I found a dufferent dream path though it had much similar (a lot of my intentions with lucid dreaming were to meet my unconscious and to interact and grow and learn in that realm).

Actually I recall my original travelling story. I was going off to create a new lifestyle for myself. Part of this was travelling but really I pictured a healthy and fulfilling lifestyle created from scratch. I would grow and expand in ways that I had been trimmed from before. I guess I was looking for a nurturing lifestyle. Yes actually I remember the words of an Irish philosopher I often thought to myself 'ask of your society whether it feeds you or vampires you. That is a crucial question' I guess I'd found that my society vampired me and I wanted a nurturing society. So in my travelling desire I was seeking the most nurturing environment in which to flourish. So yes actually this makes a lot of sense my reason for travelling had not been any tourist inclination but more of a journey to a promised land a seeking of nurturing society.

Also I'm delighted to hear that you learned also from this dream. That brings me happiness

One more thing actually jerry I don't know if this is connected but I had a very archetypically rich dream a few days after this with Gandalf a dragon around a cave entrance I wonder if this could be part of a greater story even though the dragon was male and gandalf is male so its obviously more to do with the Father side of things but still this seems like a big dream on the feminine side and that was pretty big in a masculine side.

Thanks
Jimmy

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 23 now in canada (previously travelling Australia) but from Ireland

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Internet search I think?

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes November 27- The Curse

Re: Tears with my Mother

Jimmy,
Your response stimulates my thoughts and leads me to believe the dream is focusing both on the need to reconcile the nurturing aspects related to mother/aunt as well as the deeper aspects of the 'Higher Self'. The number nine is the most powerful number and in Greek mythology is associated with the goddess, the powerful feminine aspects {which in my theory the feminine is superior to the masculine}. Your dream alludes to this power of the feminine but not in a way that distinctly points to the deeper aspects {which would involve the true self of creativity, spirituality and the 'hero adventure'}. Because you are traveling the world it must be an element {if not the primary element} of the adventure the dream is trying to communicate. This would be the message of the dream.

The Mother/Aunt Relationship
You stated in a previous response you lived an introverted childhood which mirrored your mother's personality. Yet it was your aunt who you saw as the stronger nurturing type. Her more extroverted personality probably touched your inner self {whether you are a true extrovert or not} and stimulated those energies. Whereas you do not have any real issues with your mother as a nurturing source, her personality and your upbringing was opposite of who you are in a balanced way. I am wanting to assume you are a true extrovert but I believe there is a middle ground and balance may be the true description of your personality {that middle ground is what we seek in our search for wholeness}. Your aunt completed the 'other you' and although there is not a real conflict with your mother emotionally there is that incomplete self. The number two would address both aspects {as well as any conflict}, the two guys being the 'two' of you {repairing the ship and making it work properly}. The analysis touches on many of these aspects without actually naming what the personal conflicts are {which only you can know, my having the limited knowledge I begin with}. The conflict is in your true self, true personality and balancing it and not so much mother vs aunt as the correct source of nourishment. It isn't an and/or, it is integrating who you were as a child with you are as an adult. Or more specifically who you are becoming as an adult {evolution}. That specific aspect is the deeper issue, your true self, balanced and on a higher level.

The Higher Self
I do get the sense {as I write my response} the dream was pointing to the mother/aunt issue as the primary message. But it was doing so because you are on a journey of exploration of the 'outer' world. In this journey you see a lot of things you never knew about, have gotten a different perspective of the world as well as yourself. The outward journey has awakened the inner self in its journey {we all have the inner journey, few people ever realize it}. When we look at the images/actions in the dream they can fit with this inner journey, but with the caveat you need to understand the underlying energies/foundations for your personality and personal attitudes. These are changing with your various travels. You are gaining new knowledge of the outer world which changes the inner self. But because your early life was 'introverted' your extroverted experiences seek balance. And because there was an imbalance in your early life that must be reconciled. You can not achieve wholeness until all aspects of who you are and why you are that person is understood and unresolved issues resolved. This is what I had to do in my life, reconcile my childhood and my father issues as I undertook my 'hero adventure' in discovering my true self {which led to my discovery of my intuitive abilities/dream work and my creative self in my web design/websites}. As I read heavily on Campbell and Jung {and the great many other like minded sages} I was also self analyzing my own life, making discoveries on both fronts. I believe this is what you are doing. The more I work with your dreams and get to know you {your true self as well as your personality} the more I see your journey mirroring my own. And my journey mirrors the standards in the Monomyth, the universal patterns of the human journey to wholeness. In essence I see your journey as one of great discovery and unlimited potential because you are consciously working on the inner and outer. At the young age of 23 {I was 42 when I began my conscious journey} you are at a stage to advance to a higher level of understanding few ever realize or get to {it may sound self serving but I do believe there is a higher consciousness/higher level of understanding when there is a conscious journey to wholeness, beyond what the 'normal' person attains in life}. I also see in your journey {derived from an intuitive mind where the dream speaks to that higher level of understanding} a path of self discovery that in later years will be of great benefit. But as with dreams I can only read the outlines of what that will be. And at this point in life you do not know what it is. Take this and store it away and when it occurs, well you will automatically recall the moment you first began your great psyche transition {I remember mine when I just happened to see Joseph Campbell and the Power of Myth on PBS-a true synchronistic experience/event}.
Note: My creative self is demonstrated in my websites. I began designing Myths-Dreams-Symbols in late 1998 {placed it on line as well} and it now has hundreds of pages of resourceful materials on Jungian psyche. It was an expression of my true self long before I found wholeness and reconciled my inner wounds. The Power of Dreams is a condensed version of MDS. I use both in referencing in my dream analysis.

Addressing Your Latest Response
I believe I have answered what the dream is asking/trying yo communicate. The nurturing aspects of mother/aunt, home/adventure, self {emotional} and Self {higher}. But ultimately I see the dream as a catalyst to continue your journey as you are doing. The time was ripe for new discoveries no matter how reluctant you were outwardly. The inner pull of the adventure and finding wholeness is the greater energy/force. Those of us who are fortunate to realize the need/requirement of the inner journey eventually take this outer journey. They go hand in hand and the zeal that is felt with the new discoveries overcomes the obstacles that society may throw at us {what Campbell called Social Duty, not doing what society tells/expects of us}.

The Monomyth
The journey is all about trials and revelations, and being reluctant is natural. But when you read the Monomyth you realize this level/stage is one that must be overcome or you are pushed back and have to begin again {Campbell uses the Arthurian traditions and the story of Percival in the Grail Legends to illustrate this aspect of journey/Refusal of the Call}. You can use Campbell's Monomyth as a guide as to what level you may be in your journey but realize within each stage there are also the corresponding stages of the various levels. Perhaps what is most important is to realize the journey takes time {Campbell asked his students when asked how long, "do you have 10 years to put toward it?"}. But you are living life and time is not important because you are discovering so many new things and knowledge. Seek what is within you that fulfills the outer life {Campbell's Follow your bliss}. There is where you find meaning {what is the meaning of life?}. Continue to pay attention to your dreams and learn to interpret them {it becomes easy after time, you see where the dream mirrors your life and true self}.

Joseph Campbell
“Follow your bliss.
If you do follow your bliss,
you put yourself on a kind of track
that has been there all the while waiting for you,
and the life you ought to be living
is the one you are living.
When you can see that,
you begin to meet people
who are in the field of your bliss,
and they open the doors to you.
I say, follow your bliss and don't be afraid,
and doors will open
where you didn't know they were going to be.
If you follow your bliss,
doors will open for you that wouldn't have opened for anyone else.”


Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 65 Cocoa, Fl

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Yes

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Re: Tears with my Mother

Jerry
Thank you for this beautiful response. A few things in this really resonated with me. What you are saying about introversion and true extraversion definitely rings true for me and it seems that we are definitely similar in many ways. I have been thinking about this dynamic recently and I realise that when the company is nurturing and aware (in an empathetic kind of way) then I absolutely love people and being around them. Being around such people (and they seem to be surrounding me more and more I am grateful to say) I feel no need to withdraw into solitude. It is only when I am around the normal forms of social interaction that I find my energy drained and feel a need to withdraw to recharge my batteries. Still I've always loved people but sometimes it's just hard to be around certain types for too long. It's like I feel drained by the negativity of a certain sort of realism which is so often crude and lacking a certain feeling. I dunno I still haven't fully figured it out yet but I know the feeling. It seems that introversion and extraversion can alternate.

It is interesting this issue of nurturing that this dream deals with. Since I've been in canada I've stopped trying to race to my goals and I've been working with an idea that I am happy but that clouds come up which distract from this. I've been working at dealing with these clouds but some of them are so habitual that they seem to crop up every day and obscure the sun. I've been trying to be gentle with myself I guess to be nurturing and to accept and care for these daily clouds of negative feelings. My focus on dreamwork has become part of this nurturing to find out the deeper causes of my discontent and to learn the lessons and heal these parts of me and integrate them. Of course it seems that the journey is going to be a very long one. This dynamic of my aunt and my mother has been recurring maybe 6 or 7 time in the past month and a half. I guess there is something of an ongoing dynamic at play with it.

Another point that resonates with me is this integrating who I was as a child with who I am as an adult. There has been a bit of a journey in the last few years in this respect. When I was a child I was very sensitive and cried at subtle things that wouldn't upset normal kids. This is not a very popular trait and does not lead to great pride since the common words of our society are more that crying is weak and there is a certain shame around sensitivity. I went from being this feeling kid to being a very intellectual boy and teenager. I was smart and very much a thinker. It is a way of dealing with feeling I guess I would self talk and rationally explain that there was nothing to be upset about. Over time my feelings faded. I was more thinker than feeler and that was the way until about 2 years ago when I experienced a time of crisis and grief where my heart was ripped back open again and sore as it was I found a strange gratitude and wonder at feeling so much even though it was negative and realised that I had been suppressing and had deadened my feelings. Since then I have relished emotion and sought to increase this feeling of aliveness which thought cannot bring. I am reminded of some words of Joe Campbell I read last week that people are not looking for a meaning of life but for the feeling of being alive. This seems to me an insight of the greatest degree. I guess I have been reconnecting with that feeling child these last couple of years and that this theme is a part of that integration.

What you are saying about the mononyth and this quote from Joe Campbell has me so excited and determined in this path. This inner journey I am coming across with Jung and Campbell is leaving me more and more awestruck as the implications of it are felt more and more. I'm not sure where I am in it but I shall like to explore where. I remember reading Jung's work on the chakras of the Indian traditions and his psychological interpretation of the journey through these and it has been in my mind again and again the last week as I am having these recurring dreams of water from floods to diving to finding myself breathing underwater or looking around underwater. Jung associates this with the solar plexus chakra of moving from unconsciousness to the unconscious which I guess is the ocean. It's extremely fascinating to see it occurong in my dreams although the flood is a bit intimidating I must admit.

Anyway enough of my musings thank you once more for all your help and guidance in the past few months and I wish you a very merry Christmas

Jimmy

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 23 now in canada (previously travelling Australia) but from Ireland

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Internet search I think?

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes November 27- The Curse

Re: Tears with my Mother

Jimmy,
A brief reply on this Christmas morning to let you know I read your latest post and thank you for being open about your life and journey. As i stated earlier you are fortunate to have realized your journey and begun the process of becoming your true self so early in life. Continue to explore your inner world to and you will find wholeness and happiness in life. It is not always easy to determine where you are in your journey but I can say spirituality {beyond religion} and creativity are aspects you will need to examine and make a part of your life. That will come with time.

Continue your conscious journeys to other parts of the world and be kind and compassionate to all things. Karma {cause and effect} is the ultimate rule that determines fate, the natural world being the world we live in and are a part of. But there are guides, helping hands in the hero journey. Stay the path and be assured these helping hands will be there for you.
With that I will leave you with another quote from Joseph Campbell.

“The Hero Path

We have not even to risk the adventure alone
for the heroes of all time have gone before us.
The labyrinth is thoroughly known ...
we have only to follow the thread of the hero path.
And where we had thought to find an abomination
we shall find a God.

And where we had thought to slay another
we shall slay ourselves.
Where we had thought to travel outwards
we shall come to the center of our own existence.
And where we had thought to be alone
we shall be with all the world.”

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 65 Cocoa, Fl

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Yes

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Re: Tears with my Mother

Jerry,

Thank you for sharing this quote is inspiring and amazing thank you very much and a merry Christmas to you!

Thanks,
Jimmy

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 23 now in canada (previously travelling Australia) but from Ireland

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Internet search I think?

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Yes November 27- The Curse


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