Ray,
Could be repression. Or it may be you are not quite ready. There are distinct stages of the journey and although you travel a long way there are still lessons to be learned. The inner search is a long psychological journey. Joseph Campbell told many stories about the Holy Grail {the true Self} using the metaphorical references to address the inner search. The same with alchemy. Turning ordinary metals into gold {discovering the true self through inner exploration}. As I stated about being your age before finally realizing my true inner dragons {I started my journey in 1992} I heard what was being said but did not fully grasp what was said until a breakthrough. Then it all made sense {realizing my own personal dragons}. I was free from the bonds that governed my life {unconsciously}.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 69 Altoona, Fl