Dream last night...

Went to a small restaurant/diner to meet several friends for lunch. When I arrived, I was surprised to see that they were already seated and eating. I also noticed that they had all ordered the same thing...green salad with red beans - arranged on a small, shallow plate. I walked to the front of the restaurant to inquire about a menu and was told that there was no need for one - there was only one selection offered...green salad and red beans. I was not very pleased at having no alternatives - but reluctantly agreed to the salad...providing it could be placed in a salad bowl. Again, I was told that my request could not be accommodated - to which I responded (pointing to the restaurant dishes) "I need something with depth...I can't deal with the shallowness!"

With that, I noticed the "old woman" across the dining area seated alone at a tall table and on a chair that placed her quite high above the floor level. She was not eating, but appeared very content. She offered me the option of sitting at her table, and as if reading my level of frustration said, "You know, it's alright to want more...not everyone will understand."

As always, comments welcome.

Deedee

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

hi deedee,
in a book by douglas harding ,called ,"on having no head",he covers what i think your dream is addressing.
after the long inner searching of middle age,all the wonderful spiritual progress,we reach what looks more like a dead end,a barrier.is this all there is?
do you conform to what is socially and religiously determined for our age(everyone eating green beans and salad) or do you risk alienating yourself from your relationships by saying ,there is more,i am off,see you later,as not everyone will understand.

in the reluctant messiah by richard bach there is a beautiful parable,a colony of limpets living on a rock, in the shallows,on the sea shore,they have always lived like this clinging on to the rock,then one day a young limpet says,i can't live like this anymore,i am going to let go.
the wise old limpets tell him that they have always lived this way,this is all there is,and if you let go the cuurent will wash you away,you will be smashed to pieces on the rocks.the young limpet says, he would rather die than stay like this,and lets go.
sure enough the current washes him away,he bounces a bit on the rocks for a while,but then the current starts to lift him up ,passing over various other limpet colonies further down the way,the word gets around that a fellow limpet has broken the rules and nobody has to have anything to do with him,because he's not one of them,but some limpets decide that if he can break the rules and survive,then they can to,so they let go.
some choose to call him a messiah and build a religion around him,but are still stuck to the rock.
the moral of this parable has to do with something we are all aware of,social and religious conformity,the thou shalt system.
follow your heart,and let go
food for thought.regard steve.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 49--eng

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} m

Hi Deedee,
Do you have any personal associations with the images or actions in your dream?

What shape were the plates?

What was the inside of the restaurant like?

Cheers, Stephen G.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 46

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Sydney Australia

Hi Deedee,
I like what has already been suggested - and how it fits for you.
I am interested in the 'old woman' ,,,, and her advice. Sounds like she has a regal air ,,,, an ancient wisdom
all the best
JC

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 46

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} m

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Brisbane / Australia

Hi Deedee,
Just had a second look at your dream. What stood out for me is the following question,

Why didn't your friends wait for you to arrive before they started ordering/eating? Real freinds don't do this. Your dream friends are eating the salad and beans in shallow bowls. Could this be saying that you have some relationships that are shallow/trivial/superficial? If I was in your position in the dream, I would feel unimportant, deflated. You could be feeling that you are in a uncontrolable situation, and what do people do when the are in these types of situations - they try to control what they can - I want other food - I want a different plate, but this didn't work for you this time, did it. Notice how in the dream you don't end up at the table with your so called "friends". You need a different approach for the second half of your life. Your inner wisdom, which is higher than everyone else in the restaurant invites you to her approach - It's okay to want more. More what? Friends/food/options.

The dream says you were frustrated. Was there a situation in your real life where you felt frustrated. This will probably give you a hint to what the friends represent. In your previous dream you mentioned you were having a problem at work. Maybe "friends" are representing the relationships you have with your co-workers - they're not really your freinds. They are shallow/trivial/superficial. You don't need to respond to what I have said. Just have a think about it. Cheers, Stephen G.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 46

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Sydney Australia

I've been working in New York for the past week and a half, so I missed responses to my dream posting (and the postings of fellow dreamers). As always, there is merit to all comments - and much insight offered, as well.

Humor me for a moment while I take a backward glance over the past couple of years! Aside from the trauma associated with the dissolving of my marriage, another equally unnerving aspect involves the disassociation/alienation of my church "friends" - long-term relationships which came to an abrupt halt when I made the decision that I could no longer conform to the expectations/standards being imposed on me. No immoral or illegal issues - just that I could not survive another day "stuck to the rocks". The risk to depart from the "known" in order to search for the "unknown" was huge and I was very mindful that the consequences would be far reaching. But, I absolutely never was/will be satisfied with a steady diet of green salad and red beans.

It's interesting that in my dream the friends didn't even acknowledge my presence when I entered the restaurant - I believe they've truly moved on without me. Likewise, I've moved on, too - and I belong with the wise old woman that says it's all right to want more...and that not everyone will or needs to understand.

Thanks, everyone.

Deedee

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

Hi Deedee,
I just got the feeling reading your posting that you were not surprised by your interpretation. Is your interpretation something you didn't realise about yourself? Did it give you that "Ah ha" sensation? If not, then you may have to circumambulate the dream message some more.

In order for the dream to be a compensation, you would have had to be recently thinking that you should try to reconnect with your "friends", or maybe relying too much on them?

Could this be a recurring pattern? Ask yourself does the dream overlay any other real life situations recently or in your life history? Cheers, Stephen G.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 46

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Sydney Australia

Stephen - it was a big time 'ah ha' moment...I had not actually made the 'church friends' connection until I was composing my response. Even though there are always work issues/stresses to deal with on a fairly ongoing basis, I do realize that my co-workers have been immensely supportive - true friends that would never start eating without you :)

I suppose that there could be a compensatory element in play as well - in that I have recently entertained the idea of making a reconnect attempt. However, with more clarity than even before I realize that they have made their choices - and so have I. It's time to move on.

Thanks, Stephen...you've been most helpful.

Deedee

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 47

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Female

Hi Deedee,
Thanks for sharing your moment of realisation. Before you move on you will need to ritualise the outcome in your conscious world. This is you have to do some small act that acknowledges you acceptance of the messasge. For example, write your church friends names down on a list and then destroy the list, or buy something that signifies your 'inner wisdom' and keep it with you for the next 30 days.

It is important that you create a ritual for these 'Ah ha' moments. It conveys your commitment to the message. Make sure any ritual does not cause physical harm to yourself or anyone else. They don't have to be big or expensive. Small, cheap and to the point is always better. Congratulations Deedee. Cheers Stephen G.

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 46

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Male

How Did You Find the Dream Forum? Sydney Australia