Hi Jerry

You are bang on the money with this interpretation.

Firstly, there was an inherent lack of 'cuddling' - I assume not as a baby but once I grew up a little - my mother who is very loving, has said that one of the biggest difficulties in her life was that her family are all boys and not very into hugging. I am very physical in that sense with my fiance and children, but it is strange and sort of uncomfortable in my parents / brother environment (though not so with my children - grandparents, though that may change as my boys too get older). So this could be where this need stems from.

Second, I believe I had another dream which was referencing the 'sunset' of that dating / flirting environment. In this dream, I was James Bond, but in the duration of the dream I was transformed into an old man, who was retiring. At that point the dream went from first person (James Bond pov) to third person me escorting the now retired James Bond to his wife's home. There was a very touching scene when he arrived at the house to find that his wife had left the porch light on. He was so touched that she thought of him so even after he had neglected her for so many years that he weeped. (I then went to a wild west style bar and had to ride the mechanical bull. I am wondering if this is a similar symbol to the trial of the perilous bed.)

The third aspect is that need to be loved. I had an "Oh yes" moment when trying to figure out a hero-complex I have. See, I love to play the hero, but I could never figure out what it was I was trying to achieve, because I don't like the spotlight or attention, I like praise but not directly. I find it embarassing. It was when I was watching the BBC version of Robin Hood and Robin's sidekick is explaining why he does what he does, and that is simply "He just wants to be loved." This is the same for me, it explains to me why I was so fond of hockey, and the role I had found there. It satisfied that function of my psyche.

Armed with that knowledge it is easier to let go of hockey and settle into my home life, knowing that I fill that role for my fiance and children as well as through work. All I really need to achieve is finding the time for that physical ritual to satisfy my desire for a healthy body. This is difficult at present, but I foresee life smoothing out over the next year or so as life becomes less and less of a struggle.

Thanks for the interpretation Jerry, I think you're bang on.

Cheers,
Rook

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 29 - Australia

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Rook,
Thanks once again for your willingness to discuss these personal issues. Not only is it good self therapy but by providing insights to those issues you are having to confront you are sharing insights to how the dream functions, and addressing a basic pattern that is so common in the human condition; an inherent need to be loved.

Ah! That emotion of a need to be loved. It is very often an emotional issue that we all have to confront, and is a pattern that usually begins in childhood. Even in positive childhood development there seems to be a greater need for more than what is given by parents. And although this one emotional issue may not 'make' a person be one way or another, it does greatly influence later life attitudes and actions. That is only logical, the environment we grow up providing the influential experiences that make up who we become, the young impressionable psyche of a child being greatly influenced by experience.

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The 'retiring' old man may be the wisdom self coming to terms with those childhood issues that have influenced your actions as an adult, as well as the 'sunset' of a need for the 'flirting/dating' environment. From my own experiences it was around the age of 30 that I began to move away from the need of acceptance from the opposite sex {the 'looking for love' in all the wrong places}.

James Bond is the hero and the dream is where the hero looks to perform heroic deeds of self healing. There may be a hero complex being addressed but the inner hero is also the focus. The third person is the dream and the subjective is the dreamer. Seeing oneself in terms of the third person is seeing oneself as they really are, the true self. The retired James Bond is not only moving away from the old flirting/dating self, it is the wisdom you have gained by the self examination you are engaged.

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It may be value to understand there are stages we go through in life. My oldest grandson is at a stage I recognize so prominently in my life and my son's life. I was once a sports nut but out grew that stage, largely due to my newly found interest, my bliss, in dreams and the deeper psyche. Your 'letting go' of hockey seems to fit with this stage. And your age coincides with the age I began to lose interest in sports. There does seems to be that 'natural' evolution that plays a role on maturity but not everyone reaches that point. Or is able to 'cross over' the barriers. And the biggest reason beyond the unconscious influence is a lack of discipline. If there is one aspect of the hero that is most important it is the discipline needed to stay the path. With the emotional baggage we accumulate throughout life, and the inherent childhood influences that unconsciously influence/control attitudes and actions, it is no wonder so few reach that place of 'Nirvana', of peace, harmony and bliss is life. That is the ultimate goal, the Holy Grail in life. Blissful harmony in this life.

Finding the time to satisfy the physical need for a healthy body. Physical fitness has been a 'part of my routine' for the past 30 years. It has been the one constant that delivered me from many days of negatives. If there is one thing I know about, one thing I promote as much as I do Jung's Individuation Process, it is physical fitness. It has to be part of the routine, integrated into the life. It does require a lifestyle change for most. But the benefits are major. The good health benefits are real. The better quality of life is real. The psychological aspects of a healthy body is also real. So many positives and so few negatives.

And there are other benefits that can 'titillate', such as being told you look 42 when the real age is 60. That happened to me today when getting my hair cut by two young female stylists, and it happens a lot. There is no down side to being healthy. And as long as there is a mature ego there is no harm in the benefits, even when the ego is 'titillated'.

My advice to everyone is to find the time to satisfy the need for a healthy body. I was 29 when I began my interest in physical fitness, lost 40 lbs in a year and learned to discipline myself. They went hand in hand. Anyone can do the same, and if they do there is no reason to believe they too will look 42 when they get to be 60. I don't consider myself exceptional, merely the exception. I try to pattern myself as an example. Not as a 'me' thing but something to share that is positive. Positive for me and those around me. Promoting a positive environment that I desire to live in. A giant step in that quest for Nirvana.

Nirvana is the condition that comes when you’re not compelled by desire or by fear or by social commitments....Joseph Campbell

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 60 Murfreesboro, Tn

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