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Avena. Images/Actions -somewhere else/outside mother's childhood friend's country home-childhood experiences associated with mother/rejected-suppressed/repressed experiences/emotions -by forest/lake-unconscious aspects Summary These tendencies/urges have their foundations in childhood and are associated with outside influences/experiences. The country house may have associations to the experiences and possibly your mother. Dream And i am somewhere else. I don't know exactly how to describe this place, but it is outside my mother's childhood friend's country house. I used to spend a lot of time there as a child, and it is sort of by the end of a forest by a lake. Images/Actions -fish is chasing me-unconscious energies/urges pursing you in conscious life -kill fish-put end to urges to be true self {fish is symbol for urges/true self} -can't bare to do it/it is alive-can't uncover the motivating source -not right to end it's life-emotions that are kept alive by substitution -better to run-avoiding the source -aggressively chases-aggressive emotional energies -beach by lake-emotional state of mind -have to kill it-put end to unconscious energies/urges -can't run forever-can't avoid the underlying reasons -cannot do it by myself-unable to control unconscious energies Summary These urges/tendencies are a constant. You know and may want to put an end to them but can not because they are unconsciously motivated by strong internal energies {to do with childhood}. You are unconsciously substituting needed emotional nourishment with something else. You are avoiding doing what you need to do because of current emotional issues {brought about at least partly by unconscious energies}. You know you need to put an end to these urges/tendencies {a continuous theme in the dream which probably points to an inability to do so}. You are unable to control the urges/tendencies Dream The fish is chasing me. I somehow know that i have to kill the fish, but i can't bear to do it because it is alive and i feel like it is not right to end it's life. So i decide that it is better to run. And i run and it chases me, very aggressively. I find myself on the beach by the lake and i realize that i really have to kill it, i can't run forever. But i cannot do it by myself. Images/Actions -mother's friend who is mother-rejected aspects related to mother{s} -she's not coming to help-absence of support -make weapon to kill it-develop ways to satisfy urges -making plastic cutlery/spoon/fork -artificial means for needed nourishment -sharp stick-purposeful crutch -taking time/hold fish in place-enduring unconscious energies that help support urges Summary You are substituting what was not provided by your mother with something else in your current life. There is and may have always been an absence of support from your mother. Because of this you have developed other means to substitute this needed love and nourishment. You use this substitute as a crutch for what is lacking in your life. You always hold onto these tendencies no matter how you feel about yourself {negatively}. Dream The one who's there to help me is my mother's friend who also is my mother somehow. But she's not coming to help me. She has to make a weapon to kill it, and she's making it out of plastic cutlery, maybe a spoon or a fork that she's making in to a sharp stick or something. She's taking a lot of time and meanwhile i have to hold the fish in place. Images/Actions -hold in place with spoon-control urges by providing nourishment -involuntarily hurt fish-spontaneous urges damage true self -pain by putting pressure- emotional pain pressuring urges/behavior -carving out its gill-removing its energies -disgusted by sight-consciously acknowledging negative aspects -fact I am hurting it-hurting yourself -friend is there with me-living with rejected aspects -hold it/exhausting-unconscious holding it/exhausting emotions -does not need to use spoon-reciprocal actions not needed -holding with hands-ability to control actions -not hurting it-positive actions/experiences that help -my turn again/hold it with spoon-give in to need for substituting needed nourishment -mother's friend sitting with plastic cutlery-rejected mother issues/artificial nourishment Summary You control these tendencies by providing nourishment from other sources {the substitute}. They damaging to you and cause emotional pain. You may feel disgust at yourself because of them. You are living life with rejected aspects {someone else in your early life may had the same -substitutes in their life}. You are unconsciously holding onto those early lief impressions/influences and you know you should/need to control these tendencies/urges. When ever you take positive actions to do so you again give into the tendencies/urges. You are substituting needed emotional nourishment not received from your mother. Dream I hold it in place with a spoon, a metallic spoon. But as i do it i involuntarily hurt the fish. I cause it pain by putting to much pressure on it, it is like i am carving out it's gills. And i am so disgusted by the sight of this, and by the fact that i am hurting it. And my friend is there with me and i ask her to hold it for a while because it's exhausting. She does not have to use a spoon to hold it in place. She is holding it with her hands. And she's not hurting it. But then it's my turn again and i hold it with the spoon. Meanwhile my mother's friend is sitting with her plastic cutlery a couple of meters away from us, not helping at all. Images/Actions -transported elsewhere-transferring energies -room with older sister/husband-experiences related to both/personal and symbolic -gotten new child-receiving/learning something new about yourself as a child -little girl-you -fish is there- emotional energies/urges you developed as a child -holding girl in arms-embracing these qualities and using them later in life -strange looking/old face/not baby's face-unfamiliar/unconscious aspects-from past experiences/influences -nothing we notice-unconscious aspects/energies -strange jokes baby being a girl-frustrations because of the motivating emotional energies -I am the one who starts it-these are emotional energies within you Summary There is a change where you are suddenly transferring emotional energies. Your older sister would represent your outer ego and there is something new you are now transferring onto someone/something else. The urges/tendencies remain but this new thing has become a focus. You may be developing an attitude about this new something and transferring your energies toward that. The same qualities that influenced you are doing the same with this new something/thing. But again it is an unconscious attitude. You are releasing built up tensions onto this new something. There is a transference of your emotional issues onto this new thing {which is represented by the baby}. Dream Suddenly, I am transported somewhere else. In a room with my older sister and her husband. They have gotten a new child. This time a little girl. The fish is there to. I am holding the girl in my arms. It's a very strange looking baby, it has an old face, not a baby's face. But it is nothing that we notice. We're making very strange jokes about the baby being a girl. I am the one who starts it. Images/Actions -sister sitting in chair holding girl-sister sharing same experiences -fish next to sister-sister exhibits same qualities/emotional experiences -does nothing about it-not affected in same way -let's it die on the floor-let experiences end early on -it stops breathing-no power to influence -fish can't breathe on dry land-emotional energies can't survive when person is well grounded -flirting/touching husband-communicating a need for affection from the masculine -he does same-reciprocal emotions -she is not watching/does not care/in same room-not getting/giving the needed affection Summary Your actual sister may be involved with this focus on something new. There are shared qualities/experiences both of you possess. She may also represent your outer ego, the shared qualities being new emotional issues you are now confronting. But the reaction is different. The affect is not the same. The reaction was one where there was putting an end to the shared qualities early on. This prevented an ability to influence as it has with you. The tendencies can not survive because the attitude is one that is grounded in positive qualities. A need for affection may be the new focus, the new something/thing. One of receiving as well as giving. You are not getting the affection in your present life you need. These new emotions may at least temporarily replace the older tendencies/urges but may also add new pressures to your life. This is what may have changed. Whereas the older tendencies/urges kept your focus on those needs, it kept you from thinking needed affection in your present life {relationship wise?}. Now those feelings have come into focus as well. Dream My sister is sitting on a chair,holding the girl now, and the fish is next to my sister. But she does nothing about it, she just let's it die on the floor. It just stops breathing. After all it is a fish and it can't breath on dry land. At the same time i am flirting and touching her husband, and he does the same. but she's not watching and she does not seem to take notice or care about it, even though we're in the same room. What tendencies/urges are there that 'control' your life? This is the primary focus of the dream. Jerry  
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