Jerry, you are correct and after meditating on the interpretation here is what I discern.

My deceased father was an alcoholic. Both he and a older brother engaged in the art of public humiliation-more so my brother. It created a sense of toxic masculinity and general fear of social ostracism. I am an introvert naturally which makes the toxic effects more behaviorally manifested and low self confidence combined with hypervigilience make the social piece more taxing at times. All other domains, work, etc there is no hint of these issues, not to other people as well.

The trigger has been a recent episode of hospitalization and prolonged recovery. The pain meds were a darkening experience into themselves so much so that the pain was bearable with no meds and better mood than the opposite, and got off as soon as possible. I took a midlife inventory and decided I needed to change things in my life. Being more apart of a community socially, exercise, and not working myself to death which is just plan insane. Hence, the dreams.

I still have to push the issue with establishing more male relationships and in particularly in a community setting as well. I have no problem getting along with women. However withdrawal comes naturally and works against me sometimes in balancing. B

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 54 male Oh

Have You Posted Before? Date of Last Post {Use Search and Your Post Name to Help Find Last Post} Yes, few days ago

Bob,
I appreciate the response. It sums up what the dark side is in your life and what the dream is attempting to communicate {to inform you so a healing can begin}.

Undoubtedly the issue of making friends with males stem from childhood and the experiences with your father and brother. Your problem is not alcohol but that relationship {the unconscious energies from those experiences being the motivating forces in your conscious life}. Something you experienced in early life was passed on, retained within your psyche becoming governing agents in your conscious life. The dark side is the relationship with your father and brother. The rape is metaphorical for resentful feelings toward the same sex {for women it would be the opposite sex}. The black crow going for your eye is the darker side which unconsciously is the driven side of your personality.

Jerry

Age & Gender & Location {Required}: 67 Cocoa, Fl